SHINYA | 深夜 • KNY various x Reincarnated!Reader - lillyhoplodrina - 鬼滅の刃 (2024)

Chapter 1: ACT I • Amaranthine I

Chapter Text

• amaranthine •

(adj.) undying, immortal; eternallybeautiful

(adj.) a deep purple-red

You f*cking died, didn’t you?

There’s no other logical explanation for these very puzzling circ*mstances. There’s no way you can feel the gentle grass beneath your touch, breath in the fresh summer air, or the goddamn hammering in your skull this vivid in a dream.

Your blurry gaze lingers on the unfamiliar surrounding area, slowly adapting to the pounding sunlight. This doesn’t make any sense at all. Instead of your run-down apartment, what greets you was such a beautiful Japanese (?) garden, that you could have never created at all from your imagination.

Your hands are flying up to your head, such a useless attempt to stop the headache. Various thought flies through your mind, and you try your hardest to grasp the last clear memory.

Alright, breathe [Name], just breathe and remember-

After another boring but oh-so exhausting day, pretending to be a normally functioning adult and working a very ungrateful job, you just wanted to sleep the moment you stepped foot into your small apartment.

The icy winter cold still clung to your skin, making you feel so itchy, and after minutes, it didn’t get any better. Off*ckingcourse, on the coldest winter day of the year, the universe needed to have another good giggle at your misery and broke your very much-needed heater.

You’re so done, like- so, so done with this.

Lugging your body into the tiny bathroom, your tired eyes instantly fall onto the small pill bottle, your tiny helpers when you know that no matter how much your body is exhausted, your mind will not shut up and let you have a rest.

You would never admit it, but- it is more of a habit now than just taking them when necessary. When your head finally hit the soft mattress, you were gone.

Why, oh why, were you so f*cking stupid? So utterly careless and irresponsible? You want to facepalm yourself to the next dimension; this kind of stupidity should be punished.

Oh-

Your eyes jump around. Maybe this is your punishment? Just because this place is one of the most gorgeous places you ever had the pleasure to lay your eyes upon, it doesn’t mean that it isn’t your personal hell.Who knows? Maybe it’s just a facade and the next thing you know is that Mothman comes flying down and eats you? Holy sh*t- what if he had a small finger snack?

No, no, no, no, nooooope-Time for a body check.

Touching down your body, you check everything that should be where it is; two ears, nose; eyes; lips. Good, your glorious face is still intact, and, noticing how you did it with two arms and hands, there is also nothing amiss. Wriggling your legs, yup, still moving and functioning, you almost sigh in relief,almost;being the keyword.

Patting down your chest, then your tummy, you abruptly stop and bring them slowly back to your chest- a lone tear slides down your cheek when reality hits you hard in the face.

This is hell. It has to be. Why else would your soft and squishy boobs be gone and only a more than flat chest be present? This can not be real. They could have taken everything, but God forbid, not your boobies.

Who would be this horrendous? You didn’t even have the chance to say goodbye. Cruel, this is so cruel.

The soft grass underneath you makes acquaintances with the unexpectedly tiny fist that you possess when a sharp pain greets you with the impact. You cast your eyes down, the otherwise flawless soft skin scraped and covered with dirt from the ground.

But that can’t be? The skin on your hands wasn’t this soft. It’s been years since they were. Now they have proof of your hard, thankless work, showing the world that you got bang for your buck and didn’t have enough to maintain them halfway.

It is foreign to see these tiny hands that probably never worked once in their lives. You don’t have these, butŌzora [Name]has these.

Wait-Ōzora?

That’s wrong, right?It should be [Last Name]. Yet, like fragments penetrating your mind, you see yourself dressed in what you can only identify as expensive but gorgeous Kimonos, living like a noble with a loving family.Not as an adult, no, just a five-year-old child. That explains some things. But should you be relieved that nobody stole your boobs or has a mental breakdown?

According to Ōzora [Name]’s, or your fragmented memories? You’re in an unfamiliar but familiar Japanese environment, in a child’s body with wounded hands. That’s... Not good at all. Especially not when the original owner or your past self (f*ck, this is confusing as hell) was a little ungrateful and arrogant but a very wealthy brat!

She’s a prick, not gonna lie. If you would have encountered someone like that, you would have pushed her into the mud. Always thinking she was someone so much better, being rude to the servants from the Ōzora household, and looking down on others with more unfortunate lives. She’s even arrogant towards her brother, the future head of the household, just because she’s marrying into a better household.

A fiance... You’re not even old enough to stay up longer than eight and you’re already promised to someone? That’s a weird flex, and one you’re not excited about in the slightest.This means, objectively and hopefully speaking, you’re not in the future. Who the f*ck would still make some arranged marriages this young and in modern times? Very little, maybe? You’re not so sure.

To summarize it: You’re very wealthy, even though just yesterday you worked yourself literally to death. You’re the definition of an unlikeable brat. Even though your whole life you would have never behaved in such a way, your mama raised a polite person, not a bitch. You’re five, but also already in your twenties. To top it all, you have a fiancee, while just yesterday your love life was nonexistent and the only thing you did against it was simping for fictional men and women.

Your conclusion? You’re f*cked, very, very f*cked. With not even all memories of this prick, you don’t have enough information about where you are and not enough knowledge to impose as some 5-year-old noble. Considering alone that you’re not nearly as graceful as you wish you’d be. If your new family sees how their daughter turned from a literal princess into a monkey, they would commit seppuku before even letting you shame them.

The universe must have a good laugh at this. Throwing you into such a youthful body, with a personality opposite from yourself and in ancient Japan. To be honest, this sucks. You don’t want to sound ungrateful since you get a second chance after having such an embarrassing and stupid death, but... Couldn’t it be in your country again? In the modern era???

Ugh.

Squinting your eyes at the stunning sky, while having a wistful gaze, you do what you have to do to show your gratefulness to whoever sent you here. Showing them your tiny but meaningful middle finger. A small breeze graces your skin, ruffling your smooth locks, and you’re sure you heard a tiny “f*ck you too.” but then again, how likely was that even?

A little huff of the air leaves your lips, feeling both tired and exasperated at the same time. Your hand lands down on the grass again and you mindlessly drum your fingers against the soft ground, bringing your gaze back to your surroundings.

But is this evenyourgood old universe? It is a good question, considering just everything. You’re not ashamed to admit that you may have read quite some fanfictions with similar beginnings.

You hope it’sGenshin Impact,that would be so sick. Maybe this is Inazuma?Oh, oh, oh!Then there’s a chance that the Kamisato Ayato is your neighbor? Everything would be worth it. Even your death wouldn’t be so embarrassing anymore if it means getting a glimpse of some very good-looking man.

Gosh, there’s something even better! You could get a vision, make a trip toSnezhnaya,become a Harbinger, and get one of their stunning coats! Ah, ever since they dropped that video of the harbingers; no thought behind your eyes. You only wanted to have the coat. How could you not? It’s so beautiful and so comfy. And you could hide many things under it. A cat, a snack, some weapons, the blood of your enemies.

Forget pretty men or women. You want, no, need that damn coat. Even if it costs your life(which probably would be)you will get it.

Five minutes ago you nearly had a mental breakdown. Now you’re giggling all by yourself because of a clothing item that you could have made yourself, if only you wouldn’t suck at everything you do.

But that is beside the point, the point is, you’re all alone, with dirty bloody hands, in an unfamiliar setting and snickering as if you successfully committed your first murder. If someone else could see you right now, man, that would be so embarrassing. But luckily there’s nobody near you, right? Like not at all, right?

Wrong, you f*cking donkey.

While you bathed in your euphoria of a coat and trembled in fear about Mothman, you failed to notice that your observation skill is sh*t. While you looked only in one direction and came to early conclusions, you never thought about looking for a tiny moment behind you. Then you could have managed to save the last drop of your dignity, but no, you are not that fortunate, just truly stupid.

“[Name]-chan, are you alright?”Did you just hear a frail angel calling your name in the most concerned voice that ever blessed your ears?

Wait.

Who f*cking cares? Someone addressed you, which only means that this said person saw you do weird sh*t.

f*ck. Oh, goddamn no, you’re not ready to face any living being at all. Nope. Interacting with strangers? You rather peel off your skin than do that, plus you have to act like a child. You can’t even act like a functional human.

Are you scared? Yes, super-duper terrified, there’s nobody to hold your tiny hand, no phone to quickly google aWiki-howstep-by-step tutorial for this kind of situation. Because you’re in desperate need of it, right this instance.

You will f*ck up, and that’s purely the only reason to be scared sh*tless, not because you’re scared to maybe confirm or not confirm any predictions you had. Quickly you send prayers;oh whoever, pretty please with a cherry on top. Let me have the coat, then I will forgive you for your bullsh*t. Thanks.

Now is the time to be brave. Do it for your future harbinger status. The Tsaritsa wouldn’t want anyone weak-minded. Don’t disappoint her! But... To quote Han Solo,l have a bad feeling about it.

“[Name]-chan?”

Alright, you’re getting quite rude with all your ignoring the divine voice that’s calling you.

You not so sneakily turn your head, wanting to know what sort of angel will judge you, but the moment your eyes look up to the silhouettes, you sense an imaginary rope thickening around yourthroat.

There, in the veranda's shade of a huge estate, stands a breathtaking woman dressed in such a lovely kimono, concern pooling in her orbs. Her whole appearance screams dignity, something the brat version of you could have never achieved in her lifetime, but even though someone with the tiniest bit of consideration would see that her health is not at its peak. If it was only her standing there, a warm and fuzzy feeling would engulf your whole being.

Yet, your blood runs cold, goosebumps crawling up your arms even with the warm sun shining down on you. The trembling of your body is something you couldn’t control. While your heart drums so loudly in your ears, some would be scared that your eardrums could break.

Next to the woman, on her left side to be exact, was a boy around your age, supporting his mother like the perfect being that he is. Wavy red hair, maroon-colored eyes, with a calm expression. A mark, patterns that resemble flames on the left side of his forehead. The only thing missing in the entire picture is the infamous hanafuda earrings.

How utterly unworthy and useless you feel.

And how could you not when you’re in the presence of the most powerful character of the whole good forsaken Anime? That one man that almost single-handedly defeats the main antagonist without batting an eyelash?

The goat himself,Tsugikuni Yoriichi, staring at you so intensely, that you want to cry. You fidgetnervously, the eyes of a literal demigod practically digging a hole into your skull.

“Man, I truly love Demon Slayer. I hope someday they release a Spin-off about the OG Breath User.”

Demon Slayer.You don’t need to describe what the Anime is about, not at all, fighting some nasty and some handsome demons at night while the Protagonist runs around with a box on his back containing an adorable tiny sister and so much determination in his heart.

True, you loved this series so much, but now it is a big nightmare, and why? You wouldn’t have felt all these negative emotions if it was the Taisho Era, but goddamn it, of course, you get thrown into the Sengoku Era, where your knowledge about the events is worth as much as a mush.

Is it because you wished to know more about the Era? Just because you hoped for a Spin-off, and voiced it in some Discord chat, whoever is out there thought“Why not give her the authentic experience then?”.If so, you would have rather died ignorant.

You have to rip your gaze away from him, with the feeling of small tears collecting in the corner of your eye. You know that when you look at him any longer, the first impression you will give off would be “useless”. Well, brat [Name] probably already did, but that’s beside to point once again.

So you fixed them onTsugikuni Akeno,who looks so young, with a petite build and fair skin. Slowly, you give her a nod, with a shaky smile. It is quite rude, but you don’t trust your voice at all.

If only your acting skill would be better, you must look like a complete mess in her eyes, instead of being relieved, even more, concern pooled in her dark eyes.

“Are you sure? It looks like you hurt yourself while playing. Did you try climbing the tree?” God bless this woman who’s having the basic concern for a child that’s not hers.

You shouldn’t be surprised at all that there’s a tree in a garden. It’s almost a given, but you despise the fact that you become surprised. Was it always there, or did it magically materialize when Tsugikuni-san spoke about it? Are you unaware of your surroundings?

All the years watching Detective Conan gone to waste, you didn’t even notice a tree in your proximity. At least one mystery is now solved, the reason your hands look as if you dragged them across a stony road just for the giggles and sh*t.

“Uh, I- Yeah? No! I mean, I’m alright, yes.” your voice is no louder than a whisper and so cracked. It would be a surprise if they even heard you at all, so you give them a thumbs up, which kinda hurts like a bitch,but you survived worse things. Signaling a very desperateDon’t mind me, please leave so I can cry without needing to crawl into a hole.

“What’s happening?” your beautiful unsuccessfulcharade isinterrupted when a new angel appears beforeyou. You crunch up your nose, displeased at this turn of events. More people to lie to, great. Looking at the woman that appears around the corner, andoh!Sweet Jesus, very much needed rescue in sight!

You know her, from your memories, your mother! The poor woman that birthed an unbearable child into the world and had to put up with her ass for so long.

“Ah, Miyuuki-san,” Akeno exclaims, turning her head in the direction of your approaching salvation. “It looks like she hurt herself while playing.”

Quietly you try to wipe off the blood from your hands. No need for her to concern herself with something, so unnecessary, you just want to go home. Yet, you’re as sneaky as a newborn deer so, she catches your movement and hell breaks loose. Your career as a ninja ended before you could have even given it a thought.

“Oh my, [Name] what happened? You’re bleeding.” your lovely mother turns sharply in your direction, great, even more concern directed at tiny you.

“Nothing, it’s not a big deal, really.” When does this finally end? You’re not comfortable with two mothers fuzzing about you at all. When was even the last time someone was truly concerned about your well-being? You don’t remember, it’s an alien thing for you, “I- I tried climbing the tree, but lost my footing. Just a small mistake... probably?”

While you try to unsuccessfully explain your story, your mother crouches already beside you, taking your so much smaller hands into her own and inspecting the bloody mess.Yeah, that doesn’t look yummy at all, but eh, bearable.

A frown is apparent on her youthful face, and a tiny bit of remorse hit you in the gut. You don’t even know her at all. Her small little princess is gone, and there’s nothing you can do.

It is a fact that you will never act like her. You’re an adult, a humble and shy adult, and not her outgoing and giddy brat. Did you basically steal your future?Ōzora [Name]looked up to Miyuuki and Akeno; wishing to be someday as graceful as them. Having a family and live peacefully until her dying days.You, on the other hand, could never be satisfied with that, being simply a housewife with children running around while depending solely on her husband. No thank you, while your last life also wasn’t enjoyable, at least you were independent.

Shamefully you averted your eyes, not bearing any longer to watch this woman who has only unconditionally love forŌzora [Name]. It isn’t directed at you, per se, and it makes your skin itch. It’s too much.

“I’m sorry,” you whisper. The woman instantly perks up, a small smile dancing on her face while bringing you into her arms. You’re truly sorry for stealing her precious daughter’s body, living now as an imposter in a once fictional world, your hands slowly coming to embrace the woman back.

She tightens her arms around you, obvious to your inner turmoil. “You don’t have to be sorry, it’s alright. Accidents happen, but next time just wait for your brother orMichikatsu,alright?”

Hiding the grimace on the shoulder of your mother while she brings you up. Yeah no, there’s no way you will want to be nearTsugikuni Michikatsu, the future Upper Moon One with some heavy inferiority complexes.

You already have a bad feeling about the identity of your supposed fiance. There’s no f*cking way you will wield this insulting possibility. Getting married to this man? No, never. You will not marry a man and have children with him, just for him to leave you behind to chase his brother. Disrespectful sh*thead, you may hurt your pride today, but you have too much respect for yourself to bend to such a bleak future.

If she ran around this early in his life, then wow, she was this unimportant to him to remember in his flashback chapters and that; you take now super personally. You’re gonna be a goddamn goddess in the future. You can feel it because the woman carrying you right now is one. If it comes to looks, you already won the genetic lottery, so you’re not gonna waste them on someone who will not appreciate it.

Sorry, Muichiro, Yuichiro, but search for another ancestor because this bad bitch right here will not take one for the team.

”I’mso glad you are fine, [Name]-chan,” another voice adds, Akeno’shand reaching toward your head and patting it gently. How could Ōzora [Name] become a tiny gremlin while being surrounded by such kindhearted women?She turns to her son, the more pleasing option between the Tsugikuni twins, and the one you nearly forgot about it, “Yoriichi, can you help [Name]-chan wash her hands?”

All the while she’s gesturing with her hands what she just said, pointing at you and making the motion of washing hands, oh. Right, he doesn’t have the earrings; so she still thinks he’s deaf, huh?

“What a great idea, Akeno-san, I will escort you back to your room,”your own mother beams at that, as if this was such a good idea! Yay, forceful bonding time with someone you definitely don’t want to be alone with. You take everything good you said about your mother back. “[Name], after you both are done, come back so that we can bandage them,alright?”

f*ck this, you never agreed to any of this. Damn that brat who was dumb enough to climb a tree that’s a hundred times bigger than her and dramatically fall or whatever from it. You’re just here to suffer the consequences of this ridiculous behavior.

A huff leaves your lips, well, sucks to be you because you simply can’t be rude and say nope and reject the presence of Yoriichi, he doesn’t deserve your cowardice, “Alright.”

At those words, the woman'slips form a hesitant smile before she sets you down on the floor, wow, what was this for? Didn’t she just radiant sunshine energy a few seconds ago and now she’s giving you a confused expression? Did she though you would throw a tantrum?Your mindrings out in alarm, f*ck, wereyou a dick to him too?

Damn it.You shift a little on your feet,making sure you have a good stancebefore peekingtoward the calm boy next to Akeno as if assessing a threat, which is ridiculous because he’s just a child.

He is still staring at you with these eyes, bruh, is he looking at your heartalmost exploding? Probably fascinated with the fact someone can stand still with it and not combust any second.

Or does he want a staring contest? You’re going to destroy him if that’s the case. Standing before him was a natural-born champ in staring until the other was uncomfortable. That’s your secret weapon,refined over years until absolute perfection.

So now you’re both peering intently into each other’s eyes, no one wielding, while both women sweat drop at this peculiar turn of events. Amusing how ten seconds ago you’d rather perish again than be alone with the demigod, and now you’re having a one-sided battle with said person.

But for f*ck’s sake, you don’t want to lose against a child, not when heso openly challenged you to such a duel. Think about your pride, and concentrate on the task.He may be, in every aspect, overpowered, but there’s no way you would-

OH f*ck, YOU BLINKED.

Facepalming yourself, with your still very bloody hand, ew, a small curse leaves your lips. You swear on everything that you’ve ever loved, that he hada tiny smile while basking in his win. Stupid, you had one goal and now even that’s shattered. You simply can’t win in this situation at all. This shameful encounter will affect you for the rest of your existence.

There’s a tug on your kimono’s sleeve, trying to get your attention. Peering between your fingers, confirming yup, it’s Yoriichi. It’s time to accept your demise and follow him, heading inthe direction of who knows where, all the while Miyuuki and Akeno’s eyes observe the both of you.

You will always be horrible at human interactions. No matter time, no matter the universe, that is one of the many things that will not change just because you got reincarnated into a gremlin. You used not to care about that much, back when you were well, an adult.

Now though? You are a sauntering disaster and you care very much, especially in the presence of someone so important.

How do you human again? Seriously, how? You have no idea in the least how to act and that could actually save your life right now as you follow with your eyes how Yoriichi helps you clean the mess that's your palms.

No words are exchanged, or more like, he's not speaking with you, figures, of course not. Why would he when the only thing you managed to utter was that he doesn't need to help?

So.

How are you supposed to talk with him? He,being the Son Goku of Demon Slayer, of course.Other than your Manga knowledge, you know nothing about him, and well, about his childhood is also not so much known. You can't just simply say sh*t like “Oh hi, I know you're not deaf, be comfortable around me, just don't mind me, cool?”And it doesn't help that you're pretty sure he already thinks you are the biggest weirdo ever.

Yeah, you are deadass going to cry soon. You are doomed, and it's only your first day in this ridiculous fever dream bullsh*t.

As the boy stops his movements, you bite down on your lip. Nervously, you peer at him from the corner of your eye, nearly jumping out of your skin when you realize that his hand with a damp cloth is dangerously close to your face.

Your fearful orbs jump to his calm, maroon eyes, and as if he was reading your mind, he points to his face. Your mind is too mushy to even comprehend what the heck he wants. The confusion you feel must be so evident, that he just sighs. Aye, he must be sodone with your sh*t.

“I'm sorry," you start, your eyes downcast, "I- I honestly don't know what you want,” you stutter out, what a loser you are, questioning the actions of a child as if he's threatening you with a cloth. To be honest, he probably could bring you down with nothing but his sheer willpower if he wants to.

The silence that follows makes this whole thing even more bizarre and uncomfortable. Can't you just faint on the spot and let the future [Name] handle the aftermath?

The brilliant idea that the two women had backfired, there's no way your stupid ass could ever bond with him. They didn't take into account that you're as capable as a newborn, and Yoriichi probably had zero interest in you. Now you feel a little bit bad he's also stuck in this situation.

“I- Look. I am sorry that you have to help me after I did something so dumb.” You whimper, such a poor attempt to explain yourself, but God, what else can you do? “And well, that you have to wipe off my blood. That's, ugh, probably so disgusting and I don't know, I'm just sorry.”

He sends you another of those unreadable looks that make him look even more unapproachable. How the f*ck did Uta do this sh*t?

Oh right, she's the exact opposite of you, a personified sunshine while you're just, well, a nobody? In a way, you could do so much better than this. You know it but you can't help it that you're so goddamn nervous and can't function properly.

You feel just so weirdly exposed under his gaze because f*ck, he can see your insides, that alone is so freaking weird; but that means he can also see how super anxious you are and decided to ignore your misery completely.

Or he was just as awkward as you but can hide it so much better. That's it. You don't want to accept any other reason, just, no. Don't forget he was a soft boy according to the manga, smiling so happily about a tiny flute that he received from his brother.

Shifting your gaze awkwardly, in a weird way, this thought brings you a tiny bit of comfort. Yeah, you're probably overthinking again.

“Your face is bloody.”

A voice suddenly answers and gives you almost a heart attack. Whipping your head frantically around to locate whoever the f*ck said that, is there now another person to feel with? But, no, nothing. Just you and Yoriichi.

You snap your head back to the boy before you, there's no f*cking way. But as if he reads once again your mind, he confirms it, “I wanted to clean your face, I doubt you can do it alone.”

Your brain must have stoppedfunctioning for a hotsecond, only gaping at him like a stranded fish. That's, wow, he answeredyou. According to his missing earrings, he didn't even speak to his mother but to you.

“Oh.” Don't make it, even more, weirder as it is [Name], it's no big deal. While in fact it kinda is though. Right, you remember touching your face after your devastating defeat. “I- Thank you.”

Again, you're avoiding eye contact, the dirt on your face does not help do cover the redness that spreads in embarrassment. Just let him quickly clean your face and get over it, then you can crawl back to your mother and end this horrible day.

Silence once again engulfed the two of and the cold cloth makes contact with your skin, making you almost flinch but you managed to stop yourself. Seconds feel like hours, that is until he opens his mouth once again, surprising you a second time. “You're weird today.”

Wow, straight to the point huh? No need for small talk.

“Am I?” You struggle a bit to say it without stuttering, but you can, which makes you a tad proud. You're not gonna lie and say you weren't curious about his opinion of you, or more like the brat version of you. Or about how you would normally have acted in his presence. “Why... do you think so?”

“I don't know... How to explain it but you seem scared.”Oof. Are you that easy to read? Ignoring your dumbfounded expression he continues, „Normally you would ignore me and ask about Nii-san and run to him but since before... your heartbeat is different. I have no idea why but you're nervous.”

There are other good points you could focus on from his explanation but what irks you to no end was the fact that he just hinted at the possibility that you have a puppy crush on Michikatsu.

“Are you saying that I followed your bother around like a lost duckling?” he nods to confirm your suspicion and you feel ashamed of yourself.

How young and naive your gremlin-self was, what a pity and maybe good thing that you took over. In the future, she would only have felt betrayal and heartbreak.

“That’s not gonna happen anymore.” Alone the thought of even acting like that anymore morphs your dumbfounded expression into a disgusted one. “No f*cking way, nope, that's pathetic.”

“You don't remember?” he tilts his head to the side, not taking his eyes off you for even a tiny moment.

It's a genuine question you don't have any truly truthful answer to. In a way, you remember it, but it's foggy and your precious, real memories are what overshadow the probably super embarrassing ones from the gremlin. You should be thankful for that.

But what are you gonna tell Yoriichi now? It's for the better when you don't reveal anything, at all. The butterfly effect is already a bitch, and it's already happening. He's talking, holding a whole conversation with you, and you don't know how to feel about it. Realistically speaking, you don't even think he would truly believe you and so, you decide to go for a half-truth.

“I am not sure. Even since I fell from the tree my memories are confusing, and don't even make sense at all. I obviously know who most people are, but I don't remember any interactions I had with them, wait, that reminds me I was probably an asshole to you wasn't I? Sorry.”

You giggle nervously while continuing your very long explanation, “Maybe I hit my head while I feel? I don't know, f*ck, do I even know how to read at all? I'm doomed, f*cked, utterly lost and I am scared because I know nothing.”

Once again, you hold off the tears from runningdown your eyes, ranting so openly about it makes you once again feel so vulnerable. It's not even nearly everything you have to deal with but it's enough already, poor you.

Don't forget about the poor boy before you, quite literally you just trauma-dumped him and for once he looks a bit lost on what to do. Comforting someone is truly not one of his strong points, and you can't blame him. It's his first time to even talking to someone, of course, he wouldn't really know what to do.

Yet, he clumsily pats your head, mimicking what his mother did to you. “It's alright, I also can't read and I can't speak as well as othersbut...I'm sure you can learn it again.”

You can't help the snicker that escapes you after hearing what he just said, it's such a silly thing to focus on but maybe he did it out of consideration. You don't know, but he's right, who cares if you can't read, it's not the end of the world.There's plenty of time to learn and adapt, it's only the first day.

“You’re right.” You smile at him, probably the first one he ever received from you, “Thank you, uh, Tsugikuni-kun?”

“Yoriichi.” he simply answers, ending your struggle before it even began about how to address him.

But, but, but wasn't this considered almost a taboo?Calling someone so casually that you're not close with? You wouldn't care, but damn, is this really alright?What the f*ck are you supposed to do? As ifsensing your apprehension, he sighs, “It's easier when you just call me by my name.”

“I-Alright. Then if it's alright with you please call me [Name].” To be honest, you will have a hard time adapting to the name Ōzora, and to have at least another person call you by your real name will be something comforting. “Oh! Please don't tell my mother about this. She worries already way too much.”

“If that's what you want.” He slowly turns in the direction of what you can only assume to be the direction of Akeno and Miyuuki.“But we should go back now so that Ōzora-san can bandage your hands.”

You almost forgot about them! The thought of actually befriending Yoriichi made you completely obvious to the still throbbing hands, so you waddle after him.

A fuzzy feeling engulfs you while you enter the maze of an estate. Maybe this will be fun?

Or maybe not.

The good feeling faded the instance you two rounded a corner and came face to face with the, in your opinion, not-so-tolerable twin, and, according to his expression, he’s also not in the slightest happy about encountering you.

You prayed this encounter would not take place today, but luck was never on your side.

Standing before you, dressed in black hakama pants and a white kimono, his hair styled into aponytail, while his purple-colored eyes only hold one emotion: annoyance. It’s not directed at his brother, thank God, but solely at you.

It was undeniable, but it still amazed you how they are literally the presentation of the sun and the moon and even though they are twins, it was so easy to tell the difference between them.

But why did your opinion abruptly remarkably change while yesterday, Kokushibou was one of your favorite characters?

Simple, because you take it personally now that in the future he would leave his wife and children, meaning in a strange sense you and maybe you’re too ashamed of your previous acts of a lovesick fool.

Is it childish? Yes, absolutely. You’re judging someone that at this moment doesn’t even do anything at all. The events didn’t happen and when they take place, it’s over a decade away. So, he doesn’t deserve your appalling and annoyed expression at all, but you suspect you will be done with his sh*t pretty soon.

“Ugh, it’s you.”And there it is. You’re done. No way did he just ‘ugh’ you, while you did nothing more than breathe the same air as him.

Seems like you two will not vibe very well.You’rebitingdown your lower lip to stop yourself from cursingout loud. Lifting your hand, you want to rub your neck, but a tug on the hem of your kimono stops you.Yoriichi has your kimono in a vice grip, reminding you without words what a stupid idea it would be to touch anything at all.

So the only thing you can do in this situation is to bow a bit and gift him a small greeting.

”Sup demon.”We love subtle but obvious foreshadowing, while these two obviously wouldn’t understand. For you, it was the most fitting nickname for him. “Truly a pleasure to see you, but we kinda have to go.”

He raises an eyebrow at that. First of all, you’re not shyly looking away but holding steady but very much uncomfortable eye contact, second what happened to your stuttering around him? And third, demon? The boy is reasonably confused.

You, on the other hand, were just exhausted and, for f*ck’s sake, you already cowered before a child today. This will not happen a second time. You maynot win a fight against Yoriichi, but you’re quite confident that you could take Michikatsu. He shouldn’t be that strong, doesn't matterif he already started his training. At the very least, you could give him a good punch, even with destroyed hands.

“Where to?”

Isn’t it obvious, Sherlock? “To Tsugikuni-san and Mother, I need to get my handsbandaged.”

Once again you’re lifting your two hands, Yoriichi still hanging on your Kimono, while you show your clean but very much nasty palms for the child before you to see.

He just grimaced at that and oh-ho?Is he scared of blood, or are they really that obscene to see?Just to be a dramatic little sh*tand to get away much quicker, you shove them nearly into his face. “See! And if don’t get to them quickly bandaged, I will leave a trail of blood, and that’s not good at all!”

“I get it! I get it! Put them away!” He flinches away from your tiny form and satisfaction blooms in your chest. Yes, fear me! Avoid me, f*cker! “What did you even do? Climbing a tree and falling like an idiot?”

You let both your arms fall to your side. Hesure knows how to destroy any good feeling you have. It’s already the second time in five minutes. But what irks you, even more, is the fact that apparently, you’re too easy to read. “So what? Happens to the best of us.”

Silence.

Untilyou hear him snicker at your misery. Oh boy, the audacity. But then again, you would also laugh if it was himwho fell from a tree.

“Haha alright, super funny.” You roll your eyes. Yeah, you’resuper done with this. So you turn to the more loveable twin, who has, as always, a calm expression. “Let’s go Yoriichi.”

“Wait a minute, Yoriichi?”That shut him up real quick, since when did start addressing his brother by his first name? No, since when did you even acknowledge him? Well, he quickly has to get used to the fact that many things around him will change.

“It's easier. Can’tcall you both Tsugikuni-san, that's just confusing.I am sure you would beat me with a stick if I start calling you by your first name, no?“You shrug your shoulders, not caring that you're basically breaking social norms and especially not about his confusion. “Or do you want me to? How about ‘Michikatsu-sama’?”

“I'm gonna vomit.”

“See.”Once again, you try to get past him, but he makes it incredibly difficult when he's standing in the middle of the corridor.“So don't make such a big deal out of nothing. Don't you have some training or?”

Why does such a young boy even need training already? Feudal Japan is wild, you know little to nothing about, it but it's not gonna be fun at all for you. That what you know, is basically just Otome knowledge but theidea of becoming a Japanese Mulan is so tempting. The problem?you can already feel your parents' breath down your neck. So yeah, maybe you're just a tiny bit jealous.

“Oh, right!” it's almost adorable how hiseyes almost sparkle at the reminder. Right, wasn't itMichikatsu's dream to become the best samurai?He's walking past the both of you, waving his hand when he's almost at the end of the hallway. “See you later Yoriichi.”

You grimace, taking back that he's adorable. He's a tiny demon in the making and gonna be a pain in your ass anyway.But yay, you survived encountering two important characters. Congratulations, now you just want the day to end.

Time to get your hand bandaged and leave this ticking timebomb called Tsugikuni household.

Chapter 2: ACT I • Amaranthine II

Chapter Text

Since the day of your miraculousresurrection, so much time has already passed.

You changed; everyone around youcould see it in your eyes, feel it in your touch, and hear it in your tone. You are not that ungrateful brat who only had the goal to childishly impress the young successor of the Tsugikuni household.

Now you’re seeking the comfort of the second almost forgotten son, and whenever you see Michikatsu you grimace as if you saw the manifestationof stupidity.

But what happened over time? Many things, that’s for sure.

Yoriichi has finally his infamous earrings, after convincing him that he doesn’t have to feel bad about not speaking as properly as his brother, he voiced his thoughts to others. You felt like a proud mother but ironically it was exactly on the same day as Akeno-san decided to gift him the accessories.

That made you feel a bit stupid. He would have talked about whether or not you were present. What came as a surprise was when she presented you with the same pair for you, just in your favorite color. That made you tear up because it made you feel as if you belong to them, that at the very least, Akeno accepted you.

With the biggest grin, you turned to Yoriichi, showing him your pair with the words, “Look,now we match!”. He gave you such a soft smile that it made you feel even more warm and fuzzy.

After this day,shyly and with the best puppy eyes, you could musterasked her and your mother if they could teach you both how to read. What’s better bonding time than learning something together, right? And the fact that it will come in super handy in the future.

When you two are not busy with reading or writing, you two sit on the veranda and justenjoy each other’s presence, it feels nice to just talk with him about everything and nothing at the same time.Sometimes you two do something more adventurous, and that is exploring the near environment. Running through the beautiful landscape, holding hands so that no one gets lost or falls, and ‘demigod’ was such a poor description for him, your first reaction to him was so exaggerated.

Yoriichi was flawed like any other human out there. He feels alien around other people, which yeah, of course, he does when he sees people transparent. You tried to make him understand it wasn’t anything weird for you and that he didn’t have to worry too much about it. He feels bad about his lacking communication skills, and social skills. No wonder when nobody ‘cares’ about him, other than his and your mother and you.

In a way, you saw it as odd that he even opened up about these things to you. Maybe he was comfortable enough around you because of your occasional breakdowns? It doesn’t matter in the end, you already decided to stand by his side, no matter what.It’s been a while since you had such a pure friendship, and you cherish these moments because one day, they are going to end.

Yet, what about Michikatsu and you?Bothof you made it your goal to annoy the other whenever you two meet. In front of the adults you’re all the well-behaved kids, but the moment they’re out of the picture, the insulting and teasing begins. It’s not unwelcoming at all, you would almost say you’re friendly to each other. Jerk, idiot, fool, asshole, dumbass, and so on.

After adapting to your new life, it became easier to see him not as the future Upper Moon One.You can’t stay that mad and pissy at him forever, can you? Since he was only a child of circ*mstances, he may see Yoriichi as pitiful but it’s still his brother. No one forced him to spend time with him, or even acknowledge him. But here he is, flying kits together, or playing play Sogurokuon the veranda against his father’s wishes because he wants to.

It was only natural that you would take every chance to protect these boys, even if yourbody is smaller than theirs. Mentally, you’re the adult. So when the father of the twins saw you three playing on the veranda, you took the whole blame. No way are you gonna allow him to punch a child for nothing. At the end of the day, you're the only one allowed to hit him.

Youwerebowing so deeply to the man, apologizing, that it was you who forced Michikatsu to play since he’s your fiance and you wanted to spend time with him. It will not happen again, and so on.

The man grimaced at your small form, but you didn’t care, his anger is directed at you and that’s all that mattered. The only thing you could do was grit your teeth so hard, scared that you will curse him while he only tells you to know your place and that your own father should discipline you better.Yeah, right, f*ck you too.

Inall these months you sawyour father only a couple of times, giving you some major asshole vibes. Hey, the same was the twin’s father. No wonder they are friends.And your brother? Well, you both tolerate each other and that’s it.

It’s for the best. Most of the time you’re visiting the Tsugikuni household with your mother and it’s not good to get attached to them.You thought about it every sleepless night.

What are you gonna do? What do you want to do? What can you even do?

You’re not in the Taisho Era, but in the Golden Age of Demon Slayers, and theknowledge you have about it is quitelimited. In simple words, you’re gonna be so useless.In the Taisho Era,you could at least help. You know enough about it to convince yourself that you can achieve something. But here?Yeah, not much.

Either you’re gonna sit around, do nothing, and play the part that this world forced you into, or frankly, you’re gonna get the hecky heck out of here when Yoriichi vanishes. Preferable with him and not on your own though, there’s no way you’re gonna survive alone, no matter how much it hurts to say this, especially not as a woman.

That’s why you did not even try at all to get closer to your father or your brother. Deep down you knew you will follow Yoriichi and attachment to them would only hinder you. Your throat is already tightening when you think about leaving your mother behind. Imagine if that would also be the case with them.You should just tell her something like: ‘Mother, I crave adventure. At seven, it’s time for me to leave the nest and choose my starter pokemon. Farewell, until I am the one and only champ,’ and be done with it.

Does that mean you will just pack your three things and bid adieu? No, you may be an idiot, but even you know what a dumb idea that would be. You’re gonna steal from your rich daddy because he owns you for all the emotional trauma you lived through (you did not), and it’s always good to have a start capital. After all, you don’t plan on living with Yoriichi and Uta forever, at one point you’re just gonna be a co*ckblock, and yeah, no, thank you.

Speaking of Uta, you’re excited to meet her, in the manga was not much screen time from her but she must be amazing. While you loved Yoriichi dearly, and maybe in some dark corner of your heart Michikatsu, it would be nice to have a female friend around your age. Maybe instead of a co*ckblock you should be her meat shield, or preferably not die and just overpower the demon until sunrise.

You should pester Yoriichi to teach you how he ’breathes’. He is, after all, the first user. So why not be the second one? In your mind, that sounds like a Masterplan.Not to mention, you’ve shown an interest in medicine and other medical stuffaround your mother, and possibly begged her to get you any books on the subject.Unsurprisingly it was not that much butbetter than nothing.

Basically, your plan is to run away when Yoriichi does with pockets full of money, train to your limits, eventually earn money from medicine or other medical treatments, protect Uta’s life with your own, and get your ass beaten by a demon.

Nice, shouldn’t be that hard, right? Well, in theory, everything is easy, but in praxis? Not so much, but hey, whatever happens, will happen.

It should have been a normal day like any other, but there was such a heavy feeling in your stomach. A feeling when you know you were only waiting for the inevitable.

Shortly after, the whole incident with the twins’ father, Yoriichi had shown you his newest most precious possession; the self-made flute from Michikatsu. Your first thought was, rude, that f*cker didn’t even thank you for taking the blame but your second thought was, oh holy sh*t. It’s happening for real now, huh?Soon he would want to watch his brother train and try it, too. That’s when sh*t really hits the fan.

That’s not good, no, no, no, no-

You’re not ready for that at all. A part of you knows that maybe you could have done more to let Michikatsu see Yoriichi as more than just a poor and pathetic child, but as someone on a more equal side without having the urge to vomit or telling him that Yoriichi isn’t deaf or sees things differently.

Yet, this isn’t your place to reveal. Yoriichi trusted you with all this and you’re not gonna spit on it just to change Michikatsu’s opinion or give him a gentle warning. When the time comes, you’re just gonna give him a well-intentioned talk, or explain it to him.

So, here you are. Standing in the shade of a pine tree, with a very determined Yoriichi holding your hand because wow, you need this, otherwise you would just run away. But of course, after he told you he is now confident enough to talk to his brother, there’s no way that you could have said no.

Michikatsu is practicing his swings, noticing both of you. Since you’re a polite child, you greet him with your typical ‘Sup demon while waving at him. The audacity of him to roll his eyes at your lovely greeting, continuing his training as if you aren’t even present. f*cker.

It stays like this for a few minutes and, goodness, you’re already bored out of your mind. The feminine urge to just throw rocks at him was strong, but no, it was a big moment. You can’t ruin it with your violent tendencies.

Until he finally asks, “What do you want [Name]?”

“Oh wow, can’t your lovely fiancee and your brother just see what you’re up to?” you sigh, well, time to annoy him a bit, “What if we missed you so dearly and you just ignore us? You’re breaking my heart.”

“What are you talking about?” He gives you a brief look, before continuing to stare intensively at his bokken, “Don’t flatter yourself. The only fragile and lovely thing I see is the hairpin you’re wearing.”

You click your tongue. His comebacks are getting better. In the beginning, he only gave you a nasty look or told you to be quiet, and now? Should you feel proud or annoyed?

“Thanks for noticing. I know it looks exquisite on me.” It’s the truth, and he’s only mentioning it because it was a gift from him, or well, Akeno-san probably picked it out and he wants all the credit. “What if we genuinely just wanted to spend time with you without hindering your oh-so-important training?”

“If it was only Yoriichi I would have believed it but not when you're with him.” He smirks at you, oh boy. Trying to be smug huh?

“And once again you're breaking my heart.” Wiping away your nonexistent tear, you give Yoriichi’s hand a small squeeze. “But yes, someone has something to say to you.”

Now he stops his movements and turns to the two of you completely. “[Name], if this is a confession againthen-”

“Not me you dumbass!” You interrupt him before he can even finish this shameful statement. Did he seriously think you're here to confess? Bitch, do you have some news for him.

You turn to Yoriichi, giving him an encouraging smile. It's his moment now, and even though Michikatsu’s reaction will probably not be the best it is important for Yoriichi.

From where you are, right beside him, you can hear him take a deep breath. He'ssqueezing your hand before he looks his brother straight in the eyes.

“Brother, is it your dream to become the strongest samurai in the country?” From the corner of your eyes, you can see that Michikatsu is holding his breath, completely shocked by this turn of events but Yoriichi is continuing. “I want to be like you as well.”

And with the softest smile, you have ever seen from him he finishes what he desperately wanted to tell his brother.“ Iwant to be the second strongest samurai inthe country.”

Shivers are running down your back, and goosebumps are rising on your skin. f*ck, there are even tiny tears in your eyes, because you are so proud of him. Even without you, he would have told him that but you were there when hepracticed over and over again until he finally managed to say this without pausing or stuttering.

The impact of a fallen bokken instantlydriesyour tears, wiping your head in the direction of the sound, and oh- this time your heart truly broke a little at the sight.Deep down, you wished for a different reaction, maybe at the very least a different expression but no. It's exactly as in the manga.

With the bokken on the ground, Michikatsu’s wounded hands and his expression morphed from shock into something you can only describe as disbelief and disgust. He will not say anything, you know it. You suspected it but it hurts.You are hurt for both of them, such a big miscommunication is happening right before your eyes.

Yoriichi truly looks up to his brother, you saw it as clearly. He was always so content and happy after Michikatsu spent time with him, even though he knows that Michikatsu is not allowed to.

His eyes sparkled when he told you about the flute and what Michikatsu told him that night,“Blow this if you need help, [Name], or I will come and save you. That’s why you don’t need to worry about a thing!”.For Yoriichi this was simply acceptance, he got accepted by his brother while nobody else would. Hell, even you felt emotional just because Michikatsu included you in his tiny speech.

Yes, Yoriichi looks up to his brother, not because of his skills or talents, but because in his eyes Michikatsu is an honorable and righteous person. He accepted, cared and protected him even though he is an unwanted child.

But Michikatsu on the other hand- You will have to talk to him. It's the least you can do for him, and for yourconscience. Do it now or do it when Yoriichi starts wrecking the subordinate?

You don't even have time to decide when fate literally decides for you. Before any of you could even say something, Yoriichi turns to the estate, and of course, it's Akeno-san and your mother supporting her while waving at your small group.

Your hand got squeezed one last time before the warmth leaves you, Yoriichi already walking in the direction of the woman and you hastily shout after him, "You did amazing Yoriichi, I'm proud of you!"

He turns to you, giving you a thumbs up, a skill you recently learned from you, well not a skill but more like if he doesn't want to talk or anything he can give you a thumbs up and you know.

Yet, now you're alone with a confused and probably angry child once again and boy, that's not gonna be any fun.Picking up his forgotten bokken, you almost shove it forcefully into his hands. Whatever he was thinking about, was broken when his eyes snaps to you instead of following Yoriichi's figure.

“Heisn't deaf?He could talk and hearthe whole time?“he broke the uncomfortable silence first, disbelief still evident, “Didyou know?”

He only got a nod from you,while you make yourself comfortable on the ground. This feels like it's either gonna be a very short talk or a long one

“Since when? Do mother and father know? Wait- No. More importantly, why didn't I know?”

Well, time for some very much-needed damage limitation. Yoriichi and Michikatsu’s communication skills in the future are gonna be, to put it nicely, utter sh*t. Maybe your role will officially go from fiancée to post-owl like Hedwig or to Tsugikuni whisperer?

“Since always? I mean, I thought so too but remember when I hurt my hands? That is when he conversed with me the first time, nearly passed out until I realized it was him.” You can see the gears turn in his head, realizing how long ago that was and before he can even hurl more questions at you, you continue to reply to his previous ones. "Your mother knows, your father though? I don't know and honestly, I don't care."

"Then... I was the only one that didn't know?" That is what annoys him the most, gripping the bokken harder.

"It's not like he didn't want to but-"

"Butwhat?!"

You flinch at his tone, he raised his voice at you and not in the playful way when you have friendly banter. That was unexpected and it stunned you for a second. But you can't blame him, if you were in his place you'd be just as pissed off.

"He's been practicing, you know. It's not like overnight he said 'oh, now I'm starting to speak perfectly'." Carefully, you try to find the right words while he intensely stares at you, eager for an answer."In the beginning, he was slow and used to pause a lot in the middle of a sentence, so at some point, he felt bad.He looks up to you, so he didn't want to start talking to you until he was sure he wasn't embarrassing himself in front of you.So don't be mad at him, or think he did it with any bad intentions."

He truly tries to comprehend what you are revealing to him, but it's hard to come to terms with it. The image he had of his brother is shattering slowly, and it makes his skin crawl. Is it because the boy he's always pitied is not as unfortunate as he thought all these years?

"If you suddenly feel murderous, please give me a head-ups. I do not trust a pissed you with a weapon in your hand, to be honest." You jokedafter he doesn't even answer you.

"Sorry."He snaps out of whatever haunts his thoughts andinstantly relaxed his grip, after hearing your small request. "Is that why he suddenly wants to be a samurai?"

"Probably? Maybe he wants to get closer to you?"

"But he knows he's gonna be sent to the templesoon..."

His eyes drift over to where Akeno-san and Yoriichi were and you fell silent after this.There's nothing you can say to this, because you know he's not gonna be one.

After this, Yoriichi drags you always to Michikatsu's training and you visibly grimace when you see instead of a lone boy, one of Tsugikuni-san's subordinates. That can only mean one thing, it's almost time.

But are you truly ready? Soon you're gonna be gone from this life, turning your back on your own family and simply vanishing. In a way, was it egotistical from you?

Maybe. But it is only a small part that feels bad about it. There are more important things filling your mind. Everything was ready, theoretically speaking. Your bag was packed, with essentials for a more comfortable start into the unknown.

You even wrote two letters, for your mother and Michikatsu, a brief explanation that you couldn't live such a monotonous life anymore and that there's no way you would let Yoriichi out of your sight, his chances alone out there are too small. What a lie, but a good reason as to why.

Is there anything else you need? Probably not, but you have a habit of overthinking, so you're going over your imaginary list if you truly have everything packed.

A few clothes, two or three books that contain at least some useful knowledge, money that you somehow managed to steal, food and water you have to pack when the time comes.

Oh! Right, you have a present for the twins that you still have to give them. The thought alone makes you want to giggle a bit, it's a bit childish but you managed with the help of your mother to make friendship bracelets! You can't wait to see how Michikatsu will look at you as if you're an idiot-

WHACK.

You blink, then again and again. What the f*ck.

Before you on the ground lies the subordinate that clearly was standing a few moments ago. Some nasty bumps are already forming andoh.

For f*ck’s sake, you were so deep into the imaginary survival list that you missed the main event. Damn, you furrow your eyebrows, youreally reallywanted to see how Yoriichi beats his unworthy ass. Andyou dreamed of becoming a Fatui Harbinger? Not with these sh*tty observation skills, dream onbitch.

You place a finger to your lips, maybe if you ask nicely he would do it again? Now that you think about it, Yoriichi has never denied any of your ridiculous requests.

Before you can even voice your thoughts, he's on your side again, holding your hand as if he didn't just a few seconds ago beat a full-grown man.

“I don't like it. The feeling of hitting someone.” The remorse was clear in his voice, there goes your pacifistic king.

Michikatsu is still gaping at him, visibly shaking up about the turn of events. Well, you probably would too if you weren't so busy daydreaming that you missed it.

“Well, you don't have to.” You nudge the broken sword on the ground, it reminds you to never have a physical fight with him. “If you don't like it, you don't have to. Let Michikatsu beat up the bad guys will we just cheer him on.”

With your obvious statement, Michikatsu snaps out of his daze and Yoriichi turns to leave.

Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait-Are we now just ignoring the nameless but hurt side character? Oh, we do. Alright, ok, nice. He's gonna survive. You narrow your eyes at the unconscious man before you, maybe you shouldn't leave any witnesses behind.

“[Name], let's go.” Yoriichi tugs at your hand, pulling you in the direction of the estate. No murder today what a lucky man you are, extra twenty-seven.

Oh, a lovely veranda, anopportunity to sit comfortably instead of standing around like a fool, how much you missed it. You plop yourself ungracefully on it, almost dragging Yoriichi down with you, and you giggle at his attempt to get you to sit properly instead of lying down like a dying whale.

The more gloomy twin in the situation watches with afrown, probably eager to get straight to his questioning instead of watching you behave like a clown. Sucks to be him then, being a clown is your calling and a full-time job.He is pouting, how adorable and you snicker at him without any shame, before giving in.

You sit nowproperly, letting your feet dangle from the edge, while Yoriichi sits on your right and Michikatsu on your left. That's kinda impractical, being sandwiched between them. When you questionsomeone, shouldn't you sit next to them instead of using the outsider as a wall?

Even Yoriichi is confused, probably thinking to himself, justthe three of us. You, me, and our childhood friend that you useas a wall to separate usfor whatever reason.

The urge to roll your eyes is strong, you will never get his weird whims and you don't plan on ever trying to understand them. That's a problem for hopefully future you, in the present you just want to eat the delicious cookies that Akeno-san gave you. Bless her, she knows how to make you happy.

While you fumble with the sleeve of your kimono, Michikatsu already started his questioning. Why,when, and what the f*ck.Youdon't even listen, there's no way for you to actively do any damage control.

Finally having the cookies in your fingers, you gentlygive Yoriichi one and nearly throw one in Michikatsu’s face. Sharing is caring andhe needs to breathe and shut up. His poor brother is overwhelmed with all the questions, struggling to answer one, let alone so many at once.

You see an eye twitch on the older twin's face, oh-oh, he's annoyed, good. Sticking your tongue out to him to deal some extra damage, he is ready to tackleyou.

“Don’t you have to be stupid somewhere else?”He reaches toward you and put his arm around yourneck, pulling you to his chest and reaching outto ruffleyour hair. f*cker, not your precious hair again.

“Not until four.” You try to shove another cookie into his mouth before he can answer you, “You're so much more likable when you are silent.”

In response you get your forehead flicked and it hurts like hell.You growl while slipping away from his grip, showing him your precious middle finger while mouthing ‘Bitch’ to him. No way will you corrupt Yoriichi’s pure mind with your foul language.

Yoriichi must have snatched the cookies from your lap before they could have met their doom because, in thenext moment, you have a new one in your hands and him trying to untangle yourmessy locks.That's why you love him. He letsyou do your stupid thingwhile being unimpressed about it all and just cares about you in the aftermath.

“It's simple.” And here comes the not-simple explanation from Yoriichi, but you couldn't care less when it feels so comfy when he untangles your hair. “Your opponent’s lungs expand before they strike, so just watch their bone movement, muscle construction, and their blood flow closely.”

He did seriously say all that without changing his expression huh? Time to help the struggling twin, “To save you the time and Yoriichi’sbreath, he can see through a living being's body.”

“Wait. So you can see the muscles and organs and everything for real?” He's leaning over your lap, almost pushing you out of the way to get Yoriichi’s confirmation.

Yoriichi nods, pushing him away from your personal bubble. You already knew all that, so there's nothing new for you but- wait.

Is he accessing Transparent World all the time? Does he even know what you look like with skin? You have never thought about it, are you just a meat bag in his eyes?f*ck- now you are confused. Great.

“Yoriichi?” You turn to him, now also in his face but f*ck it, you want to know! “Do you even know what we look like? I mean- how we look like for other people.”

Michikatsu perks up when he hears your inquiry, now also curious about it. It's a legit question, what if you lose Yoriichi in a crowd and he plants himself onto someone who has a very similar inside as you? That would explain why he holds your hand all the time.

“Yes.” Oh?“It's only when I focus completely on someone, but yes, I know what you both look like.”

Otherwise, he'd be missing out on somethingbecause when you grow up you're going to be damn pretty and it would be weird to have him remember you asthe walking organs he shared his childhood with.

Well, you don't have any more questions so you resume eating some cookies but Michikatsu has other plans, now it's time for your questioning.

“And you once again knew!” He accuses you and well, yeah.

“Yes, sir.”

“And you didn't tell me?”

“It was once again not my place to tell you?” you raise an eyebrow at him, “How would you feel when I tell everyone your secrets? Would suck huh?”

That shut him up. Well you don't know any of Michikatsu’s secrets, he never shared one with you but he gets the logic and back to pouting he is.What a baby. He's probably having his dramatic inner monologue about how the pitiful child was stronger than him, so dramatic, so unnecessary.

“Don't be so hard on yourself.” You pat his leg in a hopefully comforting manner, “I think you're amazing already.“

“Do you really think so?” Hiseyes widen a bit, and oh, do you even see a small blush but you can tell that he's a bit unsure about your statement.

“Yes! I remember that Tsukihiko needed much longer until he even got the basics right!”

Well, you don't remember anything like that but whatever yet it's true, you do think he's amazing and he's so much better than you will ever be. At such a young age he's already educated, and he has amassive talent for the way with the sword. If he wasn't so obsessed with his newly formed inferior complex, he would grow up as someone you wouldn't have minded marrying.

Meanwhile you? You don't have any talents, you're just a bystander.In no way do you have any special abilities like Tanjirou or Zenitsu,the only thing you have is knowledge and even that is useless.Well, you could try to get a Demon Slayer Mark and theoretically see theTransparent World but that would mean you wouldn't even reach the age of 25.

What aboutSelfless State? You're a selfish bitch, so another no.So back to being a terrible Tsugikuni whisperer or an even more miserable bystander who misses the events. Nice.

Michikatsu rubs his neck, looking away from your smiling form. Well, there's nothing more you can do, so you just shrug and turn to Yoriichi that is fumbling with his fingers.

“Can we stop talking about swords?” Ah, he's clearly uncomfortable, abruptly ending the whole topic. “I’d rather play Sugoroku or fly the kite with you both.”

Now you start fumbling with your kimono sleeve, the atmosphere turned a bit uncomfortable.Wasn't there anything you can do to at least make the situation the tiniest bit better?

OH- Right, friendship bracelets. You forgot, maybe now is the last chance to even give it to him. You pull three woven bands out of your sleeve, man, kimonos can be really practical.

“I made us friendship bracelets!” you announce proudly to get rid of this gloomy atmosphere.

One in red, one in purple, and one in your preferred color, you wish you could say you did them alone and without help but nope, your mother helped you the whole process. Gushing about the idea the whole time.It's not like you're trying to suck it up to them, but you feel a little bad that you and Yoriichi have matching earrings while Michikatsu doesn't.

“Are you serious?” Michikatsu raises an eyebrow at you, and his embarrassment quickly vanished.

“Yes, I'm super serious when it comes to stuff like this.” You quickly grab his arm, proceeding to tie it around his wrist before he can say no. “Iknow it's not exactly my best work and it's even a tiny bit corny, but well, Iwanted us all to have something to remind us of each other when we go our separate way someday.”

You turn to Yoriichi, doing the same for him while his brother inspects your gift. “Plus, it's kinda like aThank you for being my friends.”

“That's childish.” Mutters the older twin and nowyour face burns abit from embarrassment. Well, f*ck you, you grateful sh*t.

“Brother that is mean.” Yoriichi is quick to defend you, helping you to tie the last bracelet around your wrist. “You can't just say that.”

“If you don't want it just give it back to me.” You turn your head to Michikatsu, expecting to see him give it back to you but to your surprise,he frowns.

“No?!” He shakes his head, hiding his wrist from your view as if you're gonna steal it any second. “You can't take it back!”

That makes you giggle, and the gloomy atmosphere feels a little bit lighter.

“Thank you [Name].” Yoriichi speaks up, smiling softly down at the gift,“I will treat it carefully.”

“I'm just glad that you like it.”Holding your hand out to him, he's quick to take it into his own, squeezing it shortly as another thank you.

“And I hope you will not get rid of it when I'm not looking, demon!” You give Michikatsu a sharp glance, promising him pain if he even thinksabout it.

“WHA- No, of course not. I will take care of it.” He grumbles,already playingwith the unfamiliar accessory. “Thank you.”

It is sad, you know that in a few days tops, you will have to say goodbye to him. In a way, you wished that it would have never gotten to this point but- Yoriichi becoming a Demon Slayer is more important than your wish that things would have never had to change.

“I know what you're up to Yoriichi.”

It was a quiet night, a little bit too quiet. As if the world also knew what is gonna happen and is waiting holding its breathfor the moment everything is gonna change.

You begged your mother to let you sleep overat the Tsugikuni household, telling her about how the dynamic will change within it and how you want to be there for your friends.Of course, she allowed it and with tiny tears in your eyes, you hugged her so right. Mumbling a small thank you into her stomach, she laughed a bit at that, joking that it almost sounds as if you two would see each other never again.

You couldn't look into her eyes, guilt eating at your very being.

But that's how you ended up in Yoriichi’s room the last few nights, when the whole household was asleep, you sneaked out to sleep in his room. The chances that he vanishes without saying goodbye were too high for you.

The only thing you can hear in the small three-tatami room is Yoriichi’s breathing and your hammering heart when you uttered this statement and after a lifelong silence, he finally answers.

“You do?”

“Yes.” Your gaze is fixed on the ceiling, “And I want to go with you.”

He abruptly sits up from his futon, so uncharacteristic for him and you flinched. The quick motion alone made you even more nervous, but now that you can see him looking at you from the corner of your eye, it's even more nerve-wracking.

“No [Name], you can't.” This has to be the first time he denies a request from you, but you expected it.

“I already made up my mind, and if I don't go with you, I will just go alone.” Youalso sit up, searching for his hand before looking intohis eyes. “Your brother is important to me but I don't want to live a life where I am only his wife and that's it. I want to see what is out there, meet so many new people, and do more than just be a pretty accessory for him.”

Yoriichi grabs your searching hand.Histhumb strokes over your skin in a comforting manner, while your free hand plays with the fabric of the futon.

“I already packed my stuff.” You nod in the direction of your small bag, a nervous laugh leaving you. “So yeah, you can't really change my mind. It's my decision and I don't want you to go alone, even though I know you will be alright but I-

I am not ready to say goodbye to you.”

You avert your gaze, embarrassment coating your cheeks. Isn't it selfish to say that? Probably but it's true. The thought to say goodbye to Yoriichi and never seeing him again tears at your heart.

Since you woke up in this world, he was at your side and showed you nothing but kindness and trust. Another reason to go with him, is you don't want to lose that one person you're completely comfortable with.

Michikatsu expects you to be his wife in the future, the same goes for your father and brother. And your mother? You can't look her in the eye without being scared that she will not want you anymore when she realizes that you're not Ōzora [Name].

So maybe you're also running away from your responsibilities, running and running until all the connections the real[Name] had are gone and they can't judge you.

“Is that really what you want?” He asked, and it gives you hope.

“Yes, absolutely.” Mustering up adetermined expression you continue “If it's about Michikatsu, don't worry! He will find someone else, hopefully, someone he will love and not whoever his father decided for him. I know, that I want that, to marry someone I love!”

“What about your family?”

“It's alright. Mother will understand and you know I don't really care about everyone else.” You rub your neck, well, at least your not lying.

He's searching your eyes for any kind of doubts but in the end, he knows he can't convince you otherwise. It always has been like that, and he's happy that you are willing to go with him.

“Alright.” He lays down again, your hands still intertwined. “I am glad.”

“Huh?”

“I am glad that you're coming with me.” He smiles at you, and God, your heart flutters, it was easier than you thought.

So you throw yourself at him, hugging him and giggling. “Thank you Yoriichi, seriously, thank you.”

He hugs you back, and you both are lying there until sunrise.

Only one night later, around 2 AM, Akeno-san died in her sleep.

A peaceful expression on her face, as if her last days weren't filled with pain.You cried quietly, you knew it will happen but this woman was like a second mother to you even though it was not for long.

Quickly dryingyour tears, you silentlythanked her for everything she has done for you, while Yoriichi holds your hand, a solemn expression on your face.

Now it's time to say goodbye to Michikatsu.With your packed bags, yours bigger than Yoriichi’s, you made your way to his room. It felt like hours, nerve-wracking hours. You doubt that he will happy to see you with his brother, let alone announce that you too will vanish from his life.

You're seated next to Yoriichi, giving his hand a squeeze to show that you're ready, even though you're not.

“Brother?”

At first, there was nothing, no sound, no movements from the other side of the door. Yet you know it's only a matter of seconds.

“What?” His voice was clear, it sounds as if he was already awake the whole time.

“Mother has passed.”

Your own breath hitches, and you're sure if you would be the one talking, you would cry again.It's only natural when you hear his doubtful question. “What did you just say?”

The door slides open, and you can't bear to look up, even when you hear him mumble your name and what you're doing here. You just can't, your gaze fixed on the floor.

“Why would you say something like that out of the blue?” He must be frowning. “What's happened and why is [Name] with you?”

“Forgive me. Please ask our retainer Ito about what exactlyhappened.” A short pause, then “We will depart now.”

“Departing? Right now?” Slowly he's raising his voice. “Wait. What do you mean with ‘we’?”

The crack in his voice makes you look up and sh*t, you wished you had not. He's frowning, but more than that he looks almost devasted. His eyes are jumping from Yoriichi’s to yours. Searching for answers or just wanting to hear his brother misspoke.

But when you averted your eyes again, he got his answer.

“Yes, we want to say goodbye to you.” Yoriichi mercilessly continues, he's aware of his brother's emotions but still, time is ticking until someone will notice.

“I'm sorry Michikatsu-” You begin but he interrupts you.

“Why?”

“I can't let Yoriichi go alone, and I am not happy with this life.”Your eyes snap back to his, and it's the least you can do. “I want more than this and to be independent ofthe Ōzora’s. To learn even more new things and meet new people. And- I'm sorry but I just can't stay here.”

You quickly pull out the letter you have for him, holding it out to him. “This is for you. I tried my best to write it all down and I hope you can forgive him someday.”

With shaky hands, he grabs the letter from you, staring at it blankly and now you wished he wouldn't have cared for you at all. Maybe you should have played the lovesick fool instead of befriending him for real.

“This flute.” Yoriichi snaps his brother out of whatever thoughts he had, showing him the gift he got from him. “I will think about this flute as if it wereyou, brother.”

A small smile forms on his lips, looking so fondly at his flute and even you can feel the sincerity from his tone alone.

“No matter how far apart we are, I will never lose heart and I will work diligently every day.”

“And we have the bracelets right?” You add to Yoriichi’s small speech. “I hope, when you look at it, you will remember us Michikatsu and someday I know we will see each other again”

You don't have any right but you give him the best smile you can muster. He will not forgive you, you can see it in his eyes but there's nothing you can do.

So, Yoriichi and you bow low, at his silent treatment before you can suddenly hear him walking away and coming back after a few moments.You almost looked up in question when you feel something soft falling over your head and blocking your vision.

You grab whatever it isand you have to hold back your tears. It's his haori he always wears, the purple one.Before you can even ask why he already answers you.

“I have never given you anything for real, it was always frommother.” He does not look at you. “You can give it back whenwe see each other again.”

You crack another smile, mumblinga small ‘sure’ before departing with Yoriichi for real.

Hand in hand, you both wave at Michikatsu for the last time before vanishing from his sight.While running along the road to wherever your feet will guide you, you turn to look back. You can't help the small tear that glides down your cheek.

‘See you in ten years Michikatsu.’

When you turn your head back to the front, Yoriichi is already looking at you and you smile at him.

“Are you ready for our new life?”

“Yes.”

Chapter 3: ACT I • Amaranthine III

Chapter Text

You thought you were more athletic and had more stamina in this life but,oh boy, you forgot what a beast Yoriichi actually is.While you are gasping for your dear life, he looks not even in the slightest bit fazed about the fact that you two have been running for hours with little to no break in between. That has to be plot armor, right? Where is your magical superpower again?

That's seriously a bit unfair.

Yet, there's nothing that you can do other than let yourself be dragged by the hand through the province of Japan, you would drown yourself when you miss Uta just because your lazy ass wasn't able to keep up with Yoriichi. After this is over, you'll need an oxygen tent.

"I can carry you if you're exhausted [Name]." How does he even manage to talk while running for so long? You will never know, especially not when you're on the brink of another death. Doesn't matter that his voice is laced with worry for you.

"It's ok." You rasp out, ignoring how much your lungs burn. It does sound nice to not have your tiny legs work for you but ugh, you would feel bad, probably, maybe? "Just let's keep going."

Shortly after you managed with all your last energy to even answer him, you pump into his back, stumbling from the impact. You're quite sure your face would have met the ground if it weren't for Yoriichi holding onto your hand so tightly. He deadpans at you, it has to be crystal clear to him that you're not alright at all.

You suddenly feel like a child that disappointed her parents once again under his gaze. Man, since when does he have such a disapproving parent look? He is seven, for f*ck's sake, he shouldn't have mastered it already. Well, maybe it's because he knows you, and that's why. A sigh falls from his lips, wow, he sounds so done and it's been only a few hours.

You bite down on your lip as you take in your surroundings. Maybe it's been longer than a few hours, according to how the sun is mercilessly shining down on you. No wonder you're sweating like a pig.

"You look as if you will collapse any moment," Yoriichi mumbles while turning around and crouching down. "Let me carry you."

Never saw his back look so inviting to you.But, but, but, can he really carry you and two bags? "Are you sure?"

"Yes." This is the only answer you get from him.

Well, who are you to say no to a free ride? Either way, it's not like with you crawling behind that you will be faster, and damn, you're tired as hell. This young body of yours truly needs its beauty sleep.

So you launch yourself at him, as gently as possible, and curl your arms around him. You mumble a small thanks, before relishing in the warmth of his body. He grabs your legs tightly while hosting you up.

"Are you comfortable?" He asks, taking some experimental steps, before starting to jog along the road.

You smile to yourself at that, it's so typical of him. He tends to always make sure you're alright, but then again you're not one bit better. you don't know why but you don't want him to ever be uncomfortable or sad. Not on your watch. "Shouldn't I be the one asking that?"

He squeezes your leg in confirmation, concentrating on not falling or stumbling while you're on his back and your mind drifts to the scenery around you.

Since you woke up in this world, all you have ever known was either the Tsugikuni or the Ōzora household. You never noticed how suffocated you felt, but now? It feels as if you can finally breathe, the landscape is by all means nothing unfamiliar, same old trees, same old flowers. Yet, they look so much more appealing after losing the chains that were called Ōzora. Now you're just [Name], and nothing more.

Humming in content, you're so excited about the next few years that are gonna be, you pray to God, peaceful. You will meet so many new people, gosh, you will finally meet Uta! It's hard to contain your giggle, alone the thought that you could finally obtain a female friend is so great!

If your memory serves you right, then it will happen in a few hours, so enough time for a nap.

"I'm sorry Yoriichi," A small yawn escapes you. "I don't think I can't stay awake any longer."

He nudges your head with his own, his hair tickles your face at the motion. "Then sleep. I will wake you up when I take a break."

At this, you make yourself even more comfortable on his back, laying your head on his shoulder, face almost hidden completely in his neck. You love affection, truly, nothing is better than cuddling or holding hands with your personal heater, and you love how Yoriichi just accepts his fate.You don't quite remember when you started to be clingy, to be honest, maybe it was around the time you noticed that prefer body language over speaking in general. Who knows.

Yet, you probably should turn it down a notch. Can't have his future wife be jealous of you.

"[Name]?" You jolt awake, almost falling from Yoriichi's back.

"Wha- Who wants to fight?" f*ck, you snap your head up, locating whoever wants to throw hands. It took you a few moments until you remember what happened.

What year is it? How long were you asleep? What did you miss? Your blurry vision tries to focus on your surroundings, normally it would nearly be impossible to get you this quick awake, yet your subconscious must have known that it's important.

You do try your best to focus on your surroundings, it seems you have arrived at a mountain area. As far as the eye can see the place is full of compact fields and paddies. You are definitely far from home, while your home was already more populated than other areas, this one screams'village and nature'.

In any other moment, you would bask in this beautiful view, but right now? You want to go back to sleep, he's too warm and there's no way anything was as important as your much-needed rest.

"Yeah, yeah, Beautiful. If you want to take a break, alright. Don't mind me." You kiss goodbye to the scenery and close your eyes again, snuggling deeper into Yoriichi to the best of your ability. "Sorry if I drool on you again."

You can hear him sigh, poor boy, you have a feeling he will do that more often in the next few years. It would be a wonder if he doesn't ditch you in the next village and calls it a day. "No, there's someone there."

So, someone wants to fight? Since Yoriichi is a pacifistic king, and Michikatsu is gone, so you must do the dirty stuff. You groan as you slip from his back, having a seriously hard time to even standing straight. How the f*ck did you not see someone when you observed the place.

You crack your neck, a satisfying feeling spreading through you. Honestly, you don't have a lot of faith in your skills as a competitive fighter, but you beat Michikatsu's ass enough to have some sort of confidence to take on a stranger.

"Alright, who wants to catch these hands?"

Yoriichi takes your hand, man, that's impractical if you have to use them in a few moments but when he points in the direction of the threat, your eyes widen. You feel a tiny bit foolish, not only were you blind as a mole but also super dumb to expect a fight instead of a lone girl.

She is that one person you were so excited about meeting, only for your peasant's brain to forget her completely for sleep. Fair enough, you knew many people that would have done the same. Standing alone in her glory was Uta, dressed in an orange-colored kimono with a dark green geometric design with pink flowers in between. Black straight hair that reaches past her shoulders, tied with a white ribbon loosely in a ponytail. She truly doesn't look older or younger than Yoriichi and you. She is holding a bucket, silently staring down at the containment, no doubt the tadpoles.

After observing her for quite a while, you turn to Yoriichi who catches your gaze. Shouldn't he be the one to speak to first? Yet, nothing, no reaction in the slightest other than him squeezing your hand. You deadpan, already knowing that he pushing the task into your hands and you sigh.

Is he serious? He wants you to ask her. That should have been your first red flag, the first indication that maybe the future will not be as it seems but you just shrug. More annoyed that you have to do the talking instead of witnessing the beginning of romance as a silent bystander.

"Uhm, excuse me?" You shout out to her, getting no reaction at all, and a tiny miserable voice in your head was like'Oh wow, rude',you just continue."Are you alright? What are you doing here?"

You almost gave up when suddenly a quiet voice answered. "My entire family died from widespread disease. I am lonely since I lost everyone. I wanted to bring some tadpoles from the paddies back home."

She sounds almost emotionless, but you can hear the underlying sound of sorrow and your heart hurts a bit. It was something completely different to read about someone's past, and when someone tells you about it. When you read it for the very first time, you simply pitied her and that's it. But now? Gosh, it makes youuncomfortable how much sympathy you have for an actual stranger.

But who wouldn't? She's just a child who lost all her family in the Sengoku Era. You doubt someone will look out for her, maybe that's why she was quick to agree to let Yoriichi live with her, even though he could have also been a serial killer in the making.

She doesn't move at all, still staring at the bucket in her hands. You really don't want to be rude or anything, but who knows when the sun sets and you simply don't have the patience to wait for her to release them? Turning to Yoriichi once again, he truly is a bit useless in this situation. It's weird, without you by his side he would have done all the talking, so why is he so quiet now?

"Are you really going to bring them back home? Wouldn't the parents be sad if you separate them?" You ask, knowing full well that she would feel bad about it. If you're honest for a second, you do not know much about her but she has to be someone kindhearted and amazing. If she wasn't you doubt Yoriichi would have ever fallen for her in canon.

"No, I'm not..." She's slowly crouching down, releasing the tadpoles back into the paddies. "I would feel bad."

Wow, look at that, the sun didn't even set and you're already at this point. Nice, maybe you can be of some use after all. Now is the time to ask her, huh? But small doubts fill your mind, what if she says no? It's after all not only Yoriichi here, you're with him and you doubt he would leave you behind, he would never, and then what? You should have thought this through better, instead of flowing with the flow and hoping it will according to your wishes.

You bite down on your lip, a nasty habit you have developed whenever you're unsure, but nevertheless, you ask. "Then how about we go home with you? We are better company than tadpoles, I promise."

Yoriichi tugs at your hand, something similar to confusion and worry flashing through his gaze but you just smile at him, giving him a thumbs up.

Your eyes snap back to Uta, she turned in your direction releasing a small 'Eh?' and oh wow. She's super adorable, her eyes are truly like obsidian and you almost didn't notice the tears streaming down her face. sh*t, you're truly not the best to cheer up someone, especially not a child but can't just let her sit there and cry, can you?

"Hey, don't cry. I promise everything is gonna be alright." Quickly scrambling to her, you release Yoriichi's hand in favor to crouch down to her. You hand her,ah f*ck it, Michikatsu's haori to dry her tears, while patting her shoulder, smiling softly at her. Your eyes are full of sincerity. "It was hard, wasn't it? Being all alone?"

She accepts the cloth from your hand, wiping her tears with it while you can hear a muffledyes,over and over again. It almost lets tears spring into your eyes, in a way, you can understand what she feels, not completely but something oh so familiar. After all, you were also alone, thrown into a familiar but even more sounfamiliar world.

Maybe that's why you pull the still sobbing girl into a hug, in a way, you wished someone would have done it for you. Hug you and tell you it's gonna be alright. With the way she clutches the back of your kimono, it's also what she desperately needed.

All the while Yoriichi is standing behind you, and as you throw him a glance that screams 'You better do your part in comforting the girl or else' he's quick to stand beside you, awkwardly patting her head, in the same manner, he did to you.

After this emotional encounter, you were quick to introduce yourself with a big small, and, even more silently than normal, Yoriichi.

Uta was quick to do the same, all the while shyly asking again and again if you were serious about coming home with her. You thought you would be the one to ask if it's even alright with her, but she looked so grateful, it almost makes you feel bad. In the beginning, she was a bit more on the quiet side, as if she was careful not to say anything wrong, but she mustered up the courage to ask you both why you're out here all alone.

You let Yoriichi do his part, you were the one talking until this point and the exhaustion is settling in you again. So he can take one for the team and get comfortable around Uta, if only you weren't once again the one in the middle, holding Yoriichi and now Uta's hand. Is that it? Are you already starting to co*ckblock?

No wait- They are doing it so themselves, you're just once again the one caught up in all of this. Well, doesn't matter. They are not even ten, so who cares. It's probably just you overthinking.

After an uncomfortable long walk up a hill, finally, your salvation was within reach. Uta's house, which means sleeping. You can't wait to let your head hit the softness of a futon but before that could even happen she showed you both around. You were truly grateful that she lets you two stay at her home but you have to teach her to be warier about strangers- Who f*cking knows what would have happened to her if Yoriichi run in a different direction.

Yet- this was hopefully the start of the next peaceful ten years, and you have so much to do in that time.

You have to convince Yoriichi to teach you how to use the Breathe, and in general, you have to survive like any other human until theinevitable happens. You want to be as prepared as possible, and hey, maybe you only lose an arm or something?

It was truly peaceful and your life couldn't have been better. Uta became quickly someone dear to you and Yoriichi, it was only natural with her open and kindhearted personality (You still quicklytaught her to not trust any strangers).

You threemade ends meet very well, there was almost never an issue with food or money. Yoriichi soldfirewood, Utahas a garden with various vegetables, which she also sold, among other things, and you?

Apparently, you're the village doctor now, even if your knowledge was really limited in the beginning.Yet, it was rare that someone got any other illness than a cold or needs their wounds stitched from a work accident. Still, the village was grateful for any assistance, and quickly they welcomed you with open arms.

After pestering Yoriichi for months, you got him to teach you how he does his Breathing. Was he a good teacher? Depends, at first there were complications, but after working them out, you're both now capable of Total Concentration: Constant.

Honestly, it was such a long, so annoyinglylong way to get to this point. Yoriichi refused your idea of him hitting you if you ever stop using the Breathing Technique, especially in your lip. You had to promise him that if it ever hurt you for real, you would tell him and the whole project would stop.You have never told him how f*cking bad it hunted because you f*cked up so many times, but I am sure he knew.

Even Uta was against it, probably more about how you all slept in the same room and her not getting her full eight hours of sleep every night, but after witnessing how much fun it is to see your misery, she joined in it.

It was a game changer, using the Total Concentration: Constant.How you even survived until this point without it, will forever be a mystery. But that alone will not help you to fight with a Demon until sunrise and there's just no way for you to even get a Nichirin Sword.

For f*ck's sake, a Demon Slayer could spit you in the face and you wouldn't even know they are one. At this time, they don't have a uniform and it was common for men to run around with a katana strapped on their side. You can't possibly ask every single person to show you their sword.

Even if you got one through some plot armor, before getting a hit on a Demon, you probably would slit your tummy on accident because you have never picked up a katana in your life. The universe does not love you in the slightest.

After that realization, you were depressed for a few weeks, until Yoriichi finally found out why, and he wasn't in the slightest bit amused.

What a beautiful day, the sun is shining while a nice breeze caresses your face. You are sitting on the porch of the little house, and you could sigh at this peacefulness.If Yoriichi wasn't standing in front of you with a frown.

"You want to learn the way of the sword?"

You feel like a little kid again about to get the lecture of a lifetime. Sweating buckets under his piercing gaze, he is by all means not the small child anymore, he can now easily tower over you, looking more and more like his adult version and it does uncomfortable things for your heart.

"Uh- Yeah?"Get a grip, [Name]. Now is not the time to simp for him.Avoiding eye contact at all costs, damn your puberty.

"Why?" He stresses out, normally he would be moreunemotional, not using any muscle on his face but then again, he was more open about his expressions when he was alone with Uta and you.You're proud of that, knowing he is comfortable enough around to show them so openly.

And it's a fair question, you just have to be honest right?

"To protect Uta and you!" You truly try to sound as confident as possible, catching his eyes for the first time since confessing you want to learn the way of using a sword."Just- I mean,I knowwe live in a relatively peaceful area, but who knows when that changes! One day, you're out in the woods, doing your wood chopping. Meanwhile, Uta and I are dead because of reasons unknown!"

Youclench your hands hard in your lap,there's truly no point in lying. He knows you too well to know when you wouldn't be truthful to him and it's not only about a demon anymore, even though the possibility is high, but they aren't the only predators out there. Demons, wild animals, humans.

He sighs for probably the hundredth time in the last few days, all thanks to you. You almost feel bad about how tired he looks but what can you do? It is super important, and you're better safe than sorry.

"You both are not gonna die."Crouching down in front of you, he takes both your clenched fits into his own hands,intertwining your fingers and you almost melt at the warmth he radiates, but no. You have to be strong and not get swayed by his soft expression.

"Then we lose our arms, or legs, or an eye, whatever. My point still stands." It's your turn to sigh, almost rolling your eyes."It's just, you're not exactly a big fan of violence or hitting someone, so I want to be the one to protect you two, and without any form of training, I can't."

"You know that I would still protect you, right? It doesn't matter if I don't like violence or am a "Patcifistic King" You cringe, that's on you. You accidentally let the term slip from your lips a bit too often."I would never let anyone hurt Uta or you."

The way he stressed out the 'you' makes your heart flutter, and you want to curse at the blush that's slowly crawling up your neck. This is so, so unfair.You thought living with him for years would make you immune to such trivialambiguities, but nope, you getting more and more affected.

"I know. But-" You lower your gaze, shaking your head to eliminate the blush successfully."What if you aren't home? It's not like we are all together the whole day."

"You're right." You peek up at that, almost falling for it, only for you to deadpan at what he says next."From now on, I shouldn't leave your side."Bruh, and what about Uta? Well, most of the time Uta and you are together, helping each other with every task that there is.

"That's... actually sweet but not what I meant." You try to pry your hands away from his but to no avail. He has them in a strong grip. "Sometimes you come after sunset, or not for the whole night, which isn't an issue and you shouldn't change just because of me! You're great and everything. Yet, what if exactly in that timeframe something happens?"

In your mind, that was a strong argument and it's true. It was normal that Yoriichi sometimes doesn't come home for a night. The villagers love him dearly, getting every chance to just talk with him and that leads to him staying overnight at Murai-san's home. In a way, it was similar to what Tanjirou did while his family was massacred. So yeah, you're not taking any chances.

"Are you really that anxious? Did something happen? Don't tell me it's the boys from the village again." You can see how his jaw clenches, what a rare display.

"No... I growl at them every time they even breathe in the direction of Uta." You shrug, remembering one of the biggest changes and how it wrecked your whole world.As much as Yoriichi was popular, so was Uta. Especially for the male population that doesn't have a wifeand it doesn't help at all that she's not in the slightest bit interested in Yoriichi.

That must have been one of the greatest shocks you have ever experienced.When you casually, or not, asked her what she thinks about Yoriichi while rising your eyebrow in a suggestive manner, she beamed at you and told you "He's great, he's like a big brother!"You choked on nothing, hurriedly asking her if she didn't see him, maybe, as something more? But no, nothing. She completely saw him as nothing more than family.

It definitely turned your world upside down, wasn't it like fate for them to fall in love? Did you seriously co*ckblocked too much unintentionally? Thinking back to the last few years, both have never treated the other as more. No blushing, stuttering, or being nervous or shy around each other and you're definitely not the one who will force them to do anything they don't want to. It was hard to accept, it truly was, and your bewilderment lasted for a long time, but it is whatever.You want Uta to be wholeheartedly happy, regardless of some plot, or written story and if it's not with Yoriichi, then so be it.

That made a tick more protective of her though, while Yoriichi was a jackpot because you're biased as hell, you don't really know if some random boy in the village was good enough for her. Who knows what their intentions are, you will not risk Uta being heartbroken because of them.That's why you growl at anyone that comes too close, looking at her with hearty eyes that are almost pathetic.

"I don't think they want to get close to me, [Name]." Uta who has been watching your discussion with Yoriichi from the side finally voices her thoughts about the matter. Once again confusing you. She's looking at Yoriichi, both of them having a telepathic conversation when Yoriichi suddenly lets out an 'Oh.'

"Uh? Of course! They always flock to you when we are in the village or how they look at you! It's so embarrassing towatch." You huff, frowning a bit at her. More than anything you want to know what they are talking about."I may be an idiot, but I have eyes, you know."

"You are not an idiot." Yoriichi dismissesyour statement. What a cutie, but not what's important.

"When I am alone, they don't do anything like that." She shrugs, staring at you as if you should know that.Maybe you're super biased towards Uta but for her, it was crystal clear that you're the only one they make heart eyes at.How could they not? You're a confident, strong, and beautiful young woman, a kind soul who helps where she can but at the same does not take any bullsh*t from anyone.But then again, apparently, you're also blind, no way are you that obvious,even the quietest one of your trio is wrapped around your finger.That reminds her that maybe sheshould start looking for a suitable husband.

But in your eyes, they do though? Why else would they crawl out of whatever hole they were in, just to swoon about your best friend? It wasalmost normal when you were both in the village, getting goggled at as if you were some sort ofexotic animal, and the older the both of you get, it gets more persistent.What the f*ck.

"You're going to the village without me?"

"I- You know, that's maybe a discussion for another time." She also has the ability to look like a disappointed parent, before addressing the man who's still crouching before her, deep in thought about something."But Yoriichi, she does have a point. It's not only about potential other people, but we're living in the woods. It could even be a wild animal."

"See, even Uta agrees." That makes you feel confident. No way is he going to say no right? Not when even she who disagreed too many of your idiotic ideas suddenly is on your side.

"But where does that come from suddenly?" One of his hands travels to your cheek, placing it softly on it while searching your eyes for any answers but you break the eye contact quickly. It's embarrassing, and your mind turns to mush when he's this close. You don't have any issues being affectionate, but if someone gives you the same treatment you turn into a shy mess.

"I-Ugh." Time to get emotional now huh? It's annoying to show a vulnerable side of you, but it has to be done to show him that you're serious about learning some sort of self-defense."The thought that I could lose either one of you or that you could be all alone because of the actions of someone else makes me anxious, while I know I could have protected you. I would just feel better when I learn any form of self-defense."

"[Name]." You can hear your best friend mutter behind you, a touched whisper, and you are quick to use a finishing blow.

"It's true. I can't just bear the thought of losing any of you. I want us all to live a long life together!" Your embarrassment quickly vanishes as you look up again, looking so deeply into Yoriichi'smaroon-colored eyes that you almost didn't hear him.

"Alright."

"What?" Now you blink, did he seriously agree? Not that you're not happy but it's suspicious.

"But-" And here it was, of course, there was a but."We learn together, alright?"

That made you widen your eyes drastically. What?"Wait! But you said you don't like to learn it! I don't want to make you uncomfortable Yoriichi..."

"It's alright." He strokes your cheek with his thumb one time before retreating his hand and standing up. He smilesdown at you."If it's for the purpose to protect the people dear to me, I will learn it."

You hate that your heart beats even faster at the sight before you. It doesn't matter, it's just your weird teenage hormones, it will go away.

Chapter 4: ACT I • Amaranthine IV

Chapter Text

Making my way downtown, walking fast, faces pass and I'm homebound.Humming some old classics, you are truly walking through the village with your faithful company at your side.Now you look like a kid next to him, towering over you with his 6'3" height.Any other day you would have once again sulked about it, but not today satan!

Today was a good day, after months of hard training, you finally managed to use the katana at least reasonably well.Murai-san, the one where Yoriichi sometimes stays overnight when it gets too late, coincidentally was also a retired samurai. Why retired? Well, he lost an arm, but that does not prevent him in the slightest to beat you into a pulp orteaching you.

Of course, Yoriichi kept his promise and was instantly crownedthe model student meanwhile you had somecomplications.In a sense, you can now understand why Michikatsu was kinda jealous of him.In a sense, you can now understand why Michikatsu was kinda jealous of him. You had your fair share of moments where you were super frustrated and wanted to punch him for being so goddamn good.It did not help that Murai-san pushed you harder than Yoriichi, you weren't even pissed about it but actually grateful.Maybe he took you seriously? Or was it because you almost cut your fingers trying to do a cool trick? Who knows.

At the end of the day, you can proudly say you're confident enough to take down a lowly demon.and you got that feeling that Murai-san was actually a demon slayer instead of a normal samurai, it was a bit suspicious how he kept telling you 'go for the neck'.

But well, people die if you decapitate them.

The reason why you're running aimlessly through the village with Yoriichi is that a little bird told you that Uta suspiciously is often seen with a young man named Murai Kousuke,the son of your strict teacher Murai-san!Coincidence? You think the f*ck not.Yoriichi told you he's a good man from what he knows but then again, he's not exactly someone who can read people that well and it's freaking ancient Japan, you're not taking any chances, nope. You're happy for Uta, truly, go get yourself a sugar daddy or something girl, but ugh, it's complicated. Since Yoriichi is not the one for her, you just want to make sure that he's walking a green flag and not a red flag in disguise.

And so, you see the guy in question standing here, smiling at whatever Uta just told him. He has an honest face and looks like a really nice boy. When you first saw him his eyes were shining bright as if he'd found gold buried in the earth somewhere. His body was strong, even though he wasn't much older than you, and you could tell by looking at his hands how hard he worked every day. So naturally, when you saw him with Uta, you almost felt relieved.

"Uta," says Murai-san's son. "You've been neglecting me lately."

"Oh, uh..." Uta stammers. She turns back towards the house, her cheeks flush scarlet. It doesn't matter what she's thinking about—she's going to have to answer this boy. She didn't have the time to even tell you about him, maybe she was a bit scared to even introduce him to you.Quietly she says, "I'm sorry,"

"Don't worry about it." Murai-san's son gives her a knowing smile.

Utan sighs and puts on a brave front. She's still embarrassed, but she wants to put up a fight too. If she backs down now, there will be no end to Murai-san's son teasing her. She glances over her shoulder at him and says, "What do you mean?"

"Nothing," Murai-san's son replies cheerfully. "But I'll bet it's because you don't like me."

Utan scowls. "It's nothing like that!"

Oh wow, even your own eyes widen at that, never have you seen Uta react like that to anyone? She has it bad for him if he can get such various expressions from her. Uta is normally so shy around everyone but still is kind and friendly to everyone. This is the first time you've seen her this flustered by somebody else than you. Her face is flushed and her mouth is pursed tight.

"I know we haven't known each other very long, but we are 'friends'," Murai-san's son continues, "and I would appreciate it if you didn't avoid me."

That last sentence made her feel like he was saying: 'I am a friend and you should treat me as such.' But Uta is stubborn. She's always been so timid, she doesn't want to admit she likes him, even though deep inside she does and you can clearly see it. You can read her quite well.

"Uta!" You wave at her, trying to get her attention while Yoriichi and you walk over to the pair. You thought maybe he was just a good guy who'd take care of Uta, and you could leave the two of them alone but damn you're curious.She almost shrieks when she sees you two and you only gift her a knowing smile before you turn to Kousuke, greeting him. "Good evening, Murai-san."

Yoriichi bows a bit, greeting him while being too lazy to use his words again. Murai-san's son smiles at you both. "Hello."

The confident boy from a few moments ago was gone, now he's a nervous wreck. No wonder when you look him up and down, judging if he's gonna vibe well with your trio. Well, looks like he's only scared of you and that's good.You all stand awkwardly together until Uta speaks up. "Uh... Um, I think I need to go now, it was nice talking to you."

Kousuke nods, his face a mask of awkwardness.Man, it's super embarrassing. It was more fun to watch them from far away. Is this how teenagers in love act while others are around? Truly you shouldn't have come over but you needed to see him up close. It was already weird that you only know his father but then again, you have never bothered to get to know anyone for real.You shake your head at the sight and say, "Let's go."

Yoriichi follows along behind you, probably wondering why you suddenly changed your mind. Uta tries to follow you both but you turn to her, "Not you! Don't worry, just take your time. Today I am making dinner."

"Oh, um, okay..." Uta's voice trails off. "Are you sure?"

"Yes, yes. I was checking, so have fun!" You grin at her, and she just shakes her head at your antics, but she understands. For now, he passed your vibe check. Youwave at the couple that looks now so much more relaxed after you kinda give an unspokenblessing. Wasn't Uta more like the parent than you?

As soon as you both disappear into the distance, you exhale loudly and glance over your shoulder at Yoriichi. He's staring at you like you're some sort of puzzle, but he's giving you a small smile soon after. "Well, that went well. Are you now satisfied?"

You shrug. "I will never be satisfied but he is abetter optionthan Uta hanging around with some randomweirdo."

And after this super uncomfortable first encounter, you saw the couple more often together and Uta looks so incredibly happy with him, it's a sight to be seen. You're not sure if he has some magical way of making her smile like that or if she is just already head over heels for him… but either way, you decide to keep your mouth shut about it. It makes your heart swell with pride to see how comfortable she is around him.

Yet, just because you keep your mouth shut about it, doesn't mean the village does it. There's no 'dating' in Feudal Japan, nope, they get straight-up engaged, and while you already had that horrible experience, it didn't stop Kousuke and Uta. The news about the potential soon-to-be-married couple makes its rounds fast, especially when there's nothing else exciting happening. Sadly, it also shifted the attention on Yoriichi and you.

"Say, [Name]-chan, when are Yoriichi and you getting married." You hear one of the elderly ask, as you walk by, trying to get home as fast as possible. Your eyes are narrow at them as you turn towards them. Did you just hear right? Yoriichi and you? The f*ck? The elderly woman gives you an expectant look as you frown back at them.

"I don't know what you mean?" You are so confused, crossing your arms over your chest. "What do Yoriichi and I have to do with marriage?"

"Well," the woman tilts her head slightly, "since you all start living here nine years ago, we all thought it was only a matter of time with you two."Your jaw drops open at their suggestion.Do they think you guys will get married?

"No! No!"You shake your head. "We are just childhood friends; we aren't a couple." Slowly it's getting ridiculous, but, well, you can't really take offense. For outsiders, it may seem that way. Yoriichi and you are suspiciously close, living together, holding hands, and not really interested in others. You get it but still, it's a suggestion that makes your skin crawl, are you even allowed to see Yoriichi as something more?

You gulp down hard. Oh, god, now you really want to smack yourself for not thinking up a better excuse than 'we're just childhood friends.' Elderly people apparently love the childhood friends to lovers trope, and Yoriichi and you are in their eyes the definition of it. f*ck.

The woman smiles at your denial. She nods, a knowing glint as you feel a blush forming on your face, and continues talking. "But still, you two would make such a cute couple."

"Yoriichi and I are just best friends. Nothing more." You force out, feeling awkward under the older woman's stare.

"Oh, well then. Still, it would be nice to have another couple living here." The woman waves a hand dismissively. Her gaze turns to Yoriichi who is coming up from behind you and she chuckles, "It'd be nice to see kids running around our village, too. Maybe you should consider having children soon?"

Her words hit you like a slap across the face, and you stumble backward. What? Why? Lady, what the heck hecky is wrong with you? Your jaw drops open as you gasp in shock. You feel yourself growing hot and your heart begins to race in your chest. You try to calm yourself, but it's no use. You feel like you are on fire and the only way to cool yourself down would be to scream. You glare daggers at the old lady as Yoriichi comes up next to you, putting his arm around your waist and pulling you into a side hug. He pats your back comfortingly before he whispers softly in your ear, "Are you okay?"

"Yeah…" You nod. His voice calms your nerves and you relax against him. His hand rubs soothing circles on your lower back. You exhale slowly. "Sorry, I'm fine."

His grip tightens briefly, and he pulls away from you. You give him a small smile. He returns it, but he doesn't release your hand. Instead, he holds onto yours tightly. The woman excuses herself, giggling slightly at the cute display, thinking her point is proven once again and you want to roll your eyes.

"Let's go home, shall we?" He asks. "Everyone will be waiting for us."

"Okay." You agree quietly. He releases your hand and you both leave the elders and villagers behind without any further comment. As you walk home, you glance over at Yoriichi. He is watching you intently as you walk alongside him.

"Everything okay?" He finally asks, his expression concerned.

You blink a few times, unsure if you should answer truthfully or lie. Finally, you sigh and shrug, "Yeah, everything is fine."

He nods, but the worry is evident in his eyes. You sigh and let your shoulders slump. This is going to be a long night, you realize. You hope it'll pass quickly and you won't need to deal with any more questions about the future or whether you're planning on starting a family anytime soon. You groan internally, wishing you could just get through the rest of your life without hearing anyone talk about that subject ever again. But then again, maybe you should tell him about the weird encounter you had today. Kinda preparing that he will get the same questions.

"Well," You say hesitantly, "apparently the elders in the village think we should get married."

"Hm, they said the exact same thing last year," Yoriichi replies. "They're always asking me when I am going to settle down. So far, they haven't asked you yet, though."

That makes you stop in your tracks. Wait, they are already pestering Yoriichi about it, and he never told you? You murmur, turning to him, and looking up at his face. "I'm surprised you didn't tell me."

"I didn't want to bother you." He admits, and you raise an eyebrow.

"Bother me?" You scoff. "How dare you say that!"

"I know, sorry." He takes your hand in his and squeezes it gently. "Besides, I thought it wouldn't be a big deal." Well, alright. It makes sense, when he thought it wasn't a big deal why bother? You were busy with training and making sure that Kousuke was alright. Still, you are curious how Yoriichi reacted to these assumptions about you two being a couple.

"Well, I guess it's true." You grumble, rubbing the back of your neck and pouting down the road ahead of you.

"What's that supposed to mean?" Yoriichi asks curiously.

"Well, we are childhood friends and we live together. It's natural to assume that we might end up together." You mumble, and Yoriichi's brow furrows slightly.

"Ah, you mean because of the way we look and act toward each other." He clarifies. "That's not necessarily a bad assumption to make, I suppose. We do get along so well. We are comfortable with one another."

"Yes, but it's still weird when we are constantly being reminded that we are together." You huff. You take a deep breath, calming down. You shouldn't be mad, you are the one that brought this up.

"Well, I don't mind." Yoriichi murmurs. You turn your head towards him. You frown. You are the one that has been bothered by all of this, but Yoriichi doesn't seem fazed by the constant attention of the village. You are beginning to think that Yoriichi isn't really bothered by the attention.

"You don't?" You ask.

"No, it's nice." Yoriichi's lips curve upwards. You gulp, feeling a bit embarrassed. You can feel your cheeks burning as you stare down the road. Yoriichi looks at your flushed face and smiles.He squeezes your hand, and you find yourself returning the gesture."Come on."

You start walking again, and Yoriichi keeps hold of your hand. You look down at the ground, feeling uncomfortable under the weight of Yoriichi's gaze.

"You are blushing, [Name]." Yoriichi murmurs. You jump a little as his voice reaches you.

"I do not blush, that's for losers and Uta." You force out a smile, trying to hide your embarrassment. You can hear Yoriichi chuckle and squeeze your hand a little harder.

"If you don't want people to think that we are together, then why did you let them see you holding hands with me?" Yoriichi asks, and your head snaps up to look at him. Your mouth drops open as you realize what he is saying. "You let them see you holding my hand, of course, they will think that way."

Your cheeks flush redder as you nod slowly. "Well, that is how we usually walk together. We have been doing that forever and it's weird to not do it anymore?"

"It reminds me," He murmurs quietly before locking eyes with you. "You would have been already married to Michikatsu by now."

"Hm, true." He is good at changing the topic that quickly, but changing it to his brother is new. Yet, it's true, by now you indeed would have been married to Michikatsu, and that thought alone is weird. Years ago you often thought about him but now? Not so much, you're busy with your 'medical' job, training, and enjoying your time that Michikatsu wasn't present anymore. "Well, luckily I didn't."

"Do you miss him?" Yoriichi has a faraway look in his eyes, you are sure he misses him. But you? In a weird way yes, his Haori still lays next to your futon, and on nights you can't sleep you ask yourself if he's alright but that's it.

"Yes, I do," You murmur and watch the light play through the leaves as you climb up the hill to your home.

"I do too," He murmurs as you pass him, and you feel his hand tighten around yours. "You think we will ever see him again?"

"I don't know. It's possible." You turn to look at him, he looks sad and worried. "Don't worry Yoriichi, I am sure he is alright. He probably is sitting at home with his wife and bores her to death. Maybe he even tells her some stories about our childhood?"

"Yes, I think you are right," Yoriichi says softly and you grin at him. If you didn't f*ck up canon all too bad, you're sure you will see him soon. How old are you both again? Sixteen, so you give it maybe two years until the events start again and your peaceful time comes to an end. But weirdly enough, you're not scared at all.

Uta was in good hands with Kousuke, she will get her happily ever after without dying for the plot. The demon should still show up that day, and maybe Yoriichi will be present for that. The Rengoku look-alike will still come a few days later, asking about the demonic f*cker and you can still join without any troubles. And then, one day, Yorichi will kill a bunch of demons and then meet Michikatsu again, and that's how it is supposed to go. You've read the book, you know what to do. You are prepared.

You will just enjoy your time until it happens.

You thought after some time the whole ‘Yoriichi and [Name] would be such a cute couple’ would have been forgotten by you. Sadly that was not the case at all, it only made you more aware of Yoriichiand well, romance and stuff.

Itwasn't as if you have forgotten about your goals, they were actually quite simple. Do not let Uta get killed by a demon, join the Demon Slayer with Yoriichi, let Michikatsu not turn into a demon, and, as a possible goal, let Yoriichi kill Muzan in one go. Simple right? But then what?

When you accomplish all these then what will you do with the rest of your life? You simply don't have an answer, maybe you should settle down. In your past life, you hadn't had the possibility for it but now?

Yoriichi is handsome, and you are sure nobody could at the moment compare to him. He's a gentleman, knows you better than anyone else plus he'syour best friend. Or is he?

You've known him since childhood, there's nothing wrong with being this close right? It does not have to mean more than it is. But if you think that way then you're a fool!

Are you two truly just friends if you can feel his breath on your delicate neck in the silence of the night or when his hand finds yours, lacing together beneath the covers of this old futon?How tightly do your bodies have to be pressed against each other on the coldest nights until you admit you aren’t doing this only for his warmth?How many times does his thumb need to brush your quivering lips with an obvious excuse of “There was something” before you admit that this is going too far?

Or how long must you sit next to him in complete silence, holding hands, looking at each other before you realize you want so much more? Because you know damn well that you cannot hide your feelings from yourself anymore. The feelings you hold for Yoriichi, which have become stronger over time, are undeniable.But are these just the damn teenage hormones, or truly something bigger?

What ifyou areindeed in love with Yoriichi? Then what doyoudo with my feelings? Is it okay foryouto pursue him? Would it be acceptable for you to take the risk of falling in love withhim, knowing that I might bite you in the ass later?

Do you even care?

"[Name]." A voice called out, interrupting your thoughts.“You are already awake?”

"Yeah.”You replied, turning around and smiling at Yoriichi who had woken up early. His eyes looked tired but also contented. He smiled back, pulling himself up to his feetfrom the futon

"Good morning~" You greeted, stretching and yawning.

"Morning." He responded with a small smile,joining you on the veranda. His arms sneak around you, pulling you closer to him as he leans his head againstyour shoulder."Couldn't sleep?"

"Yeah, it's weird without Uta." You answered, it's been a few days since she moved out but your mind still wandered off, thinking about your previous question.“But I'm glad that she's happy.”

“She'singoodhands,”Yoriichi said quietly, resting his chin on top of your head. "ButI hope we'll see her soon."

"Me too..." You sighed. "I already miss her food. Her breakfast was heavenly.”

“Oh yeah...that reminds me, you haven't eaten yet, right?"You shook your head.Yoriichi chuckled, kissing the side of your forehead. "Let me prepare some food then.”

He stood up and walked towards the kitchen, leaving you aloneon theveranda. After a while, he returned with a plate full of rice, miso soup, pickled vegetables, and fish.He took the place next to you, handing you the chopsticks.

"Thank you," you smiled. "I really appreciate it."

"No problem," he smiled back, picking up a piece of fish.You bit into your own portion of fish, savoring its sweet taste. You then picked up a piece of tofu, dipping it into the miso soup.

"So, what's the plan for today?"

"Nothing special," he shrugged. "We could train outside again if you want though."

He truly knows you so well, if you aren't busy searching for herbs or helping around the village. The training with Yoriichiwas your new hobby, getting fit and sometimes getting a glimpse of shirtless Yoriichi. It's a blessing.Maybe you were just overthinking. You like the way it is between you two, so you will just go with the flow. If it will become something more, then you will welcomeit with open arms, if not, then it's alright.

You are eighteen years old when reality comes crashing down on you. The peaceful days, were soon over and how do you figure this fact out?Uta is pregnant, as in truly pregnant with a child from Kousuke. A round belly greets you every time you visit her and even so the first moments are filled with excitement, the small voice in your head reminds you that soon, your first encounter with a demon will happen.

"How far along?" You ask Uta. She's sitting on the floor of thetatami room, looking at you with widesparklingeyes.

"I'm six months." Her face beams up at you with joy.So you have still two months huh? That's enough time to give it your all again with some training.

"This is wonderful!" You exclaim happily. "Is there anything I can do for you?" Your mind goes straight into action mode; you have to train harder than ever before!

"I'll be fine, but thank you." She says quietly. "There is something else though…"

"Yes?" You're worried about what she might say.

"I- To be honest, I am scared, like super scared. It's my first baby, and I have heard so many terrible stories about how giving birth and... God, could you please be there when it's time?”

Youfeel like a huge weight has been lifted off your shoulders. "Of course! I would love to be there!" You hug her tightly.

"Thank you, thank you so much!" She buries her face into your chest, clinging to you.

"Hey, it's okay! It's going to be all right!" You reassure her. "And now we just have to wait for the baby to come. This is really exciting!"

"Yes, yes it is! But I can't help worrying that I won't be able to do it..." She sighs.

"You'restrong, Uta! I know you can do it!"She smiles up at you, grateful for your encouraging words, truth be told, you are probably more scared than her.

The days go by, and soon you're back in thebackyard. You've been training hard, so hard that you're almost unable to move. There are a few more weeks untilher child is due, so you spend your time thinking about how to prepare for this.You aresitting on the woodenlogoutside, staring at the sky as the sun slowly sets. The sounds of the insects fill the air, the sweet scent of the flowers filling your nose.

"I think I have never seen you train so much." You hear a voice behind you.“It's almost nighttime.”

Turning around you see Yoriichi,standing next to you with afrownon hisface.

"Oh, um, well, uh, yeah. Ithink with Uta having a baby soon it makes me a bit more protective in a sense?” You say while wiping away the sweat from your forehead.

“You look exhausted. Are you sure you should be training so hard?" He asks.

"Yeah, I'm fine, just a little tired." You reply. "So what did you want to talk about?"

"Well,Uta told me she wants to deliver the baby here."

You blink a few times and look at him in confusion. "Huh? Here as in, right here?”

He nods, and it makes sense. It's her house, she did grow up here, and she wants you to be there when it happens.Yet, you have a feeling that it is canon that wants to make your life harder and more miserable.

“Let's get you cleaned up. You trained enough for today.”He takes your hand and leads you inside.

It's almost time.Two months never felt that f*ckingshort and suddenly you do not feel ready at all. Uta and Kousuke are already moving into her old room, it was already exhausting for her to even do things so it was natural.

Yet, now you wished you would have convinced her to give birth in Murai-san’s home.Or at least somewhere else.

Youstand in front of the door, biting your lip as you wait for Yoriichi.Kousuke is in the village, packing some stuff, and will come back in the morning, and Yoriichi? Soon, on his way to the midwife.

There's no turning back now, huh?You try to imagine what might happen whenthedemon will strikebut it's all too much. You're scared that you will f*ck up badly.

Yoriichi is stepping outside, meeting your nervous form at the entrance. “Hey, don't worry. I am back before sunset.”

“I-” What can you say? Why not go tomorrow? Or the day after, or when Uta already got the baby? You had a feeling that the longer you will try to postpone it, even fate will pull its strings to make the demon show up no matter what. “Alright, but please be quick.”

You take his hand, squeezing it slightly while you stare at the ground.

“I'll be back soon." He whispers, giving you a quick peck on the cheek.

"Thank you," You mumble before he disappears.

The sun is setting, and the sky is filled with dark clouds. It's almost as if the weather wants to make you feel more depressedand anxious.

"f*ck, f*ck, f*ck!" You mutter under your breath, the wind blowing your hair around. "This is it! This is happening now!"

You walk through the house, passing Uta who is sleeping peacefully on her futon.You look around the room, thinking about how small it looks now compared to when she was younger.

It's not long until you hear someone knocking on the door. Youquickly close the sliding door to Uta’s room, gripping the Katana in your hands before rushing over to the entrance.

"Who is it?" You ask,even though you can already guess it. Soon you will come eye-to-eye with the monster that killed your best friend in the original story. But what throws you off ultimately was the teary voice that answers you.

“Onee-san, please,” Your heart beats faster, there's no way, but the crying voice continues mercilessly, “Help me please, I am lost.”

You take a deep breath, and then another. There's no way you let that thing into your home, and if it means pinning it down until sunrise, so be it. You don't have a Nichirin,just a normal one but you have a rope, enough training, the surprise moment, and a plan.You will kill it in the ‘Shinazugawa Sanemi pre-demon slayer style’, luring it with blood and letting it hang from a tree. Hopefully, it's a lesser demon without any fancy Blood Demon Technique, otherwise, you are f*cked.

“Oh gosh, just one moment!” You answer it, playing along while drawing out your katana. The quicker it will be over the better.

You jerk open the front door, and for just a moment you can watch the demon before you start your attack.It has the perfect disguise, the shape of a small child that even you almost thought you were making a mistake, but you can catch the vague scent of blood and feline pupils that are shocked by the katana coming swiftly at its neck.

It evades at the last moment, what would have been a perfect cut is now just a small gashin the neck. Blood is trickling down as it jumps back and you can see that it's regenerated.

“Onee-san, whyare you attacking a harmless child? That could have killed me.” It sneers in your direction. The attitude changed so quickly, it's almost comical.

“Shut up, we both know that you're anything but harmless.” You're shutting the front door close with your foot, not letting the demons out of your eyes. “It's disgusting how pathetic your acting is.”

“Thenyouknow that I could kill right now if I wanted to, woman.” It growls, ready to bounce at you any moment.

“So could a dedicated duck, you ain't special, bitch.”Statistically speaking, it was more likely that it kills you instead of a duck, but you will not give it that glorious satisfaction.

You take a step forward, preparing yourself for your next strike but before you can take another one, its nails are almost scratching your eyes out.

Out of sheer reflex and probably so much luck, you swing your blade again, separating its outstretched arm, blood splattering everywhere while the limb falls to the ground as you kick it away.Regeneration costs them stamina, and by the way, it searched for food, it means that its resources are low and that's good for you. The lower the stamina, the quicker it will go down.

“You bitch!” The other arm tries to grab your neck, making the same mistake twice as it also falls to the ground with a thumb.

“Wow, you're quite dumb huh?” Maybe mocking the demon before you is a bad idea, but after your first shock, it gets easier. The Breathing that Yoriichi taught you, and the sword training from Murai-san give you confidence.

Maybe a bit too confident, as it kicks your feet away, making you land on your butt while it grabs the arm on the ground successfully reattaching it. The other one is also slowly regenerating.f*ck.

As you try to get up, it jumps at you and the next thing you know is the unbearable pain in your left shoulder. Its sharp nails are buried deep into it, while you push your forearm into its mouth as it tries to take a bit of your neck.You will gladly sacrifice anarm if it means getting out of this sh*t alive. But then it happens. The demon stiffens as your blood gushes out of your wounds.

f*ck, no, no, no, no, no, no.You're not a f*cking Marechi, that's no- f*ck this sh*t. Fate or whatever gave you a death flag?Now you're f*cking pissed. A demon child is snacking your arm, fate hates you and everything just hurts.You hate it.

You grab the katana and bring it to its neck as it is more concentrated on your delicious taste to even notice your movements. It's notgraceful and there's no way you can cut through it in this position but you give it a try. It's halfway through until it got stuck, and the demon on top of you yelps, letting go of your arm and that's enough for you.

Grabbing its head by the hair, you jerk the sword out of its neck, just to quickly swing it onto it again, detaching its head successfully as you push its body away from you. Pinning its arms down with your legs while you hold up its head.

“Yeah-” You take a deep breath, before locking eyes with the demon that's cussing you out, totally high and wonky from your blood. “You are f*cking dumb. Turning into a mindless animal the moment you taste a bit of blood.”

“Says the idiot without the special sword that these hunters use.” It talksas if it is completely drunk, probably not even realizing what it even says while the body trashes beneath you.

“Don’t care. At least I'm not the pathetic excuse of a demon. You're kinda like a bitch in heat now huh?”

So now what? You have to tie its body to a tree but how are you are gonna do it?You scrunch up your nose, should you just cut off its limbs or?

You throw the demonichead into the forest, you just want a moment of peace and its constant shrieking gives you a headache. Withthe katana, you pierce its body to the ground; taking away its chance to stand up again.

That should give you enough time to at least tie up the body, and the head. Well, you can just kick it around until sunrise.

While you tie it up you thought that this was a little bit...Isit weird that it's kinda anticlimactic?Nothing about this was graceful or elegant, not even badass but just messy. It makes it even more f*ckedup that it is the body of a child. A very strong one but still.

The body is hanging from a tree, and you make your way over to where you have thrown the head. It was easy to find with all the insults it throws your way. Grabbing it by its hair, your pin it with your sword against the tree; next to its body.

Well, at least Uta is still asleep and well, alive!Congratulations on successfully accomplishing your first goal, when this is over, you need a drink.But for now, you have to wait. It's weird to have a conversation with a head that has a sword sticking between its eyes but whatever,“Hey, you demon f*ck. Since when are you running around and acting as a pathetic excuse?”

“Why the f*ck should I tell you?” It f*cking hissed at you. Alright, DetectiveMittens.

“Why not? You're gonna die soon. Have at least a normal conversation before you turn to ashes.” You shrug your shoulders,bad idea, you forgot that one of them is nearly in shreds.

“Dunno’, maybe ten or twenty years.”

“That's cute.” You settle down, ripping some fabric from your kimono to dress up your wounds. Would suck to bleed out now.

“The f*ck, why are you so weird? How did you even know I was a demon?”

“Well, it's the middle of the night, I know every single person from the village down the mountain and the next village is around 2 or 3 hours away. It's so unlikely that some random ass child that I don't recognizefinds this house and you smell.” You wince a bit when you see the damage to your arm. It's nasty and reminds you of your childhood.

“Doesn’t explain how you know what I am.” It rolls its eyes at you, now that you have a better look at it and do not have your life or Uta’s in danger you notice it's a boy with turquoise eyes and red hair, maybe around thirteen years old,clad in a dirty old kimono.

“I am a firm believer that some rumors have the tiniest bit of truth in them.” You will not expose your damn secrets to him, knowing your luck you will have some Hatengu bullsh*t situation where this small demon will telepathically communicate with Muzan, and the next thing you know you're dead. “It's more of a horror story for kids than a rumor but it had to come from somewhere.”

“Fair enough.”

For a short while there's only silence while you try to wrap the fabric around your shoulder, a cold breeze makes you shudder, it's always super cold before sunrise and according to your almost good sense of time, you give it maybe an hour.

“So, is that your thing? Searching for lone houses in the forest and hoping for a midnight snack?”

“Yeah. Humans are dumb, they fall for the ‘lost child’ act pretty quick.” He tries to act nonchalant but you can tell that his instincts to flee from the impending doom are running wild.

“True. If it makes you feel better, you also almost tricked me.”

“It really doesn't.” No wonder the Demon Slayer is hunting down his ass, he probably didn't even think about all the evidence he left behind. Half-eaten human bodies, now who could that be? Ding ding, a demon. Figures.

“Oh.” You would ask about his past or some sh*t, but he probably can't remember at this point, so you settle with playing with your destroyed kimono, you pout a bit. It was expensive, and a gift from Yoriichi and Uta for your sixteenth birthday. Maybe you can sew it? But you're super bad at it, and getting the blood out of it will be a pain in the ass.

You look at thechild again, he's probably a demon that got turned accidentally. It makes you wonder, are they truly evil? Some didn't even have a choice, and not everyone can have a plot armor like Tanjirou and Nezuko.

“Hey,” He snaps his eyes to you as you call out to him, “Do you have a name?”

He frowns down at you, before looking back in the direction where the sun will start to rise verysoon,“Why do you even care?”

“Well, you kinda traumatized me here, and it would be nice to know the name of the one who did it.” You crack a smile at him, half joking but actually not.

“I- I don't know. Can't remember.” He murmurs, and you hear a hint of sadness.

“Then I will give you one.” You clasp your hands together, once again a bad idea as the pain spreads through your left arm.

Now his attention is solely on you, wanting to know what kind of name you will give him, and luckily you have already the perfect one for him.

“How about Ichijū?” You beam up to him, almost giggling as you explain, “With ‘Ichi’ meaning ‘One’ since you're the first demon that I have encountered and ‘Jū’ as in ‘Tree’ since you know.”

He deadpans at you, then he sighs, “Whatever, I will take it.”

“Well nice to meet you Ichijū, I wish it was under better circ*mstances but I am [Name].” In the corner of your eye, you can see the already-illuminating sky, the sunrise only a few moments away.

And as if he now accepted his fate, his face softens as the first sunbeams start to show up above the trees, hitting the bottom of his body first as it slowly burns away. There's no screaming or anything. It's almost peaceful.

“I guess... Itwas nice meeting you.”

He smiles until there's nothing left of him; only the rope that hangs from the tree.All the adrenaline that kept you updisappearedthe second the last bit of Ichijū’s ashes vanished.

You are lying on the ground, letting themorning sun warm up your cold body, and quite frankly, you don't know what to feel. Relief because it's over and nobody died? Sad that it was a child that you just killed? Or should you mourn a what-if-friendship?You don't know, you don't know, you don't know. You feel everything but at the same time absolutely nothing.

The good arm, the one that still completely functions lies over your eyes, shielding you away from the rest of the world. Small tears building up in your eyes. Will you always feel like this after you kill a demon? Probably not, but it still sticks with you. This was not satisfying at all, you thought that you would feel at least the tiniest bit of joy but nope, apparently, you are a demon apologist, f*ck.

The sounds of the morning fill your ears. Birds chirping is such a beautiful sound, so much better than the demonic wails and shrieks you heard last night. A smile spreads across your face as you let yourself relax for the first time since last night. You don't even care that you are half-naked; you feel no shame or embarrassment whatsoever. You sit up, feeling your shoulder. It hurts like hell, but at least you are alive. Still, you need to clean the wounds and probably stitch them, which sucks already enough, but you have to quick, so it's gonna be messy.

You stand up, feeling dizzy from the blood loss. You don't even bother putting on the last bit of your kimono, just grab your katana and take off into the forest to the small stream. Washing the blood out of your hair and cleaning the cuts and bite marks, you start to bandage them up properly. The wound on your left shoulder is not as worse as the one on your arm, but both are deep, and you'll need to keep an eye on them. You will be sore for a while, you know, but it's a price you are willing to pay.

How are you going to explain this to Yoriichi and Uta? You walk back to the house, where you left the rope hanging from the tree. As you reach up to entangle it, you hear something. Footsteps. You listen carefully, and it sounds like someone is walking toward you.

Your head jerks up and you look around. f*ck, it's Yoriichi, and of course without the midwife, figures. You look back down at your shoulder and notice that there is blood dripping from your kimono onto the ground. sh*t, you really need to stitch them, there's no way to hide at least this wound huh? You look up again and see that he is coming closer.

"Yoriichi." You call out. At first, he's smiling and waving before he abruptly stops and looks at the complete mess that you are. His eyes are wide open.

"What happened?" He asks, voice shaking. What greeted him was your small form, bloodied up even though you tried your best to get rid of it. The once beautiful kimono hanging from you is bare covering your shoulders and you look just tired, the once glittering eyes that you possessed are dulled.

"Remember these silly horror stories about man-eating demons? Well, they aren't that silly." You say and show him the bite mark on your arm.

"What? Are you serious?" Yoriichi's voice cracks. You nod and wipe your mouth with the back of your hand. You don't want to tell him that it was basically a child, the thought still makes you want to vomit, but you have no choice.

"Yes, sadly." You say and try to put on a brave face, but you can feel the tears building up in your eyes. "But hey, I am alive, and Uta is alright, I think she didn't even witness anything with how deep she sleeps."

Yoriichi's face falls and he runs over to you, pulling you into his arms. He holds you close, and you lean your head against his chest, feeling the warmth of his body. "I'm sorry." He says and kisses the top of your head. "If only I would have gone a day later."

"It's not your fault, Yoriichi." You say, wiping your eyes. "You had no way of knowing what was going to happen. If someone told me that a sh*tty demon's gonna attack me, I would have laughed."

"Yeah, well, maybe we should start to listen to those stupid stories then." He says, but you just laugh. You want to sleep and just forget about it for now.

As you sit in your room, with Yoriichi assisting you in stitching up your wounds, you explained the events that happened. That it was a child, how it regenerated, and so on. The demonic basics, and of course about the 'Hunters' and the 'Special Swords' as Ichijū called them.

"So, if the Hunters are real, why haven't they come here before or be more known at least?" Yoriichi asks. Starting to bandage the living sh*t out of your shoulder and you just wince at the pressure.

"I don't know. Maybe because we're a small village? It's not like we get the news first here and to be honest if some dudes proclaim to hunt demons most people would just raise a brow and be done." You say, looking at your shoulder."But I have been thinking that maybe their own communication is just sh*t and in a few days some 'Hunter' will show up."

You look up at him, still feeling the bandages being applied. "But what do I do if he does come? Tell him 'Hey dude, you're a few days and it cost me an arm?'"

"Well, you can definitely brag about it," He says, checking the stitches on your arm. "But I have a feeling you want to join them."

"Am I that easy to read?" You sigh, now comes the hard part, convincing him to join you.

Without Yoriichi the future generation would be f*cked. "You see, I don't want to be an average person in an average village living an average life. I want to be someone who did something, not someone who closes her eyes and pretends to not know that there is something so evil out there and I could have helped someone. You know, Yoriichi, this feels just right to me, but I don't want to do this without you, I can't do this without you."

He looks at you for a long time, sometimes it is impossible for you to read what's on his mind.

"Why?" He asks suddenly.

Your heart sinks at his question. He wants to know why? What the hell am I going to tell him? It was true, you just wanted to do it, and not having anyone else to fight alongside made you feel even more vulnerable than usual, but more importantly, he is too important to not join for the sake of the future. You can't teach them the Breathe as well as him, and f*ck, you definitely can't magically create 'Sun Breathing', this world did not make you in the slightest OP. You struggled against a child and probably only survived because it was distracted for a second. And yet, Yoriichi is the man that has the ability to make things better, all with his own two hands.

"I've always had this feeling like we need each other," You answer him. "It's a feeling like I get when I wake up and see your face in the dark. But I also get this feeling every time you show me something new, or just show me that you're here. You know, it has always been us and now with Uta starting a family it just feels like the right thing to do, and don't you think that maybe your special talents could benefit them?"

"Let's see if even a 'Hunter' will come, otherwise it would be hard to even join or to find them." Yoriichi's hand reaches down and places it on your fidgeting one. Your eyes lit up, that's not a no! It's a maybe and for now, that's enough for you, but Yoriichi does not look as happy with the prospect of joining them. He keeps looking around for a moment before sighing, "We'll see how this plays out."

The following next week, everything was very much uneventful, the story that you told Uta what happened and she believed you wholeheartedly. It made you feel a little bit fuzzy that she trusts you so much, but that quickly vanished after she apologized for not being there for you. Did she forget that she was pregnant? What a dork, and she's not even fazed at all by the idea of Yoriichi and you may be joining the 'Hunters', more than anything she encourages it!

Other than that, you couldn't do much but only wait for the dude to show up, and do some minor housework. That's pretty much all you can do at the moment since your shoulder is still tender, so it makes sense.

And then, finally, on a rainy day, the moment you slip on your sandals to at least go search for some fresh herbs, the front door jerks open and instinctively you throw one of your shoes at the intruder. But who do you end up facing? A tall guy with abnormal colorful hair, long bright yellow hair with red streaks akin to flame tied into a ponytail.

You should have figured that he would just waltz into your home, but what freaked you out was how he looks just precisely the same as the Rengoku Kyojuro. Of course, you expected an unlikely resemblance but that was just unreal, they could be twins! The whole situation was surreal, even the vibe he gives off was the same as you imagined the 'real' one would give, for a short moment you thought you woke up in a canon timeline.

"I'm sorry, I didn't think someone would still live here!" He says with a chuckle, "I thought I would find corpses instead of well, you."

The fact that he said that, even if it was a joke, makes you deadpan, and a small frown makes its way onto your face, "Wow, thanks. If you're here for the demon, you're too late, he's dead."

"That makes my job easier. Did someone come before me?" For a short moment, he looks almost shocked before once again laughing, what a cheerful guy, and hands you your sandal as he proceeds to look around your humble abode.

"Nope. You're the first one. The demon came a few days ago, but I killed it, or well, the sun did-"

"Did you kill him yourself? How is that possible?"

You shake your head. "I tied him up a tree and let the sun finish the rest, and as you can see now my arm is for the time being useless."

"Damn, so you got in a fight with one of a demon and survived, what else do you know about them?" He asks. Now this feels like an interrogation, and you don't like it. Why is he acting as if it's some secret? Before you can answer him, you hear footsteps behind you.

Uta emerges from the kitchen, curiously looking at the two of you before bowing in the best way of her abilities in a greeting.

"I-I'm sorry, I didn't mean to interrupt..." She says. "I didn't know we had a guest, [Name]?"

"More like an intruder than anything." You sigh, signaling to the 'Rengoku'-look alike to follow you. "He's here to ask about the demon."

"Oh!" She looks surprised at that information before nodding. "I'll be in the back, please excuse me." And without saying another word, she quickly retreats into the house. You watch her go, slightly unsettled by the way she acts, maybe she's searching for Yoriichi?

You settle in your room, at first you thought of serving him some tea but then again, he broke into your home and rude people don't deserve tea. So instead you just sit on the floor in silence for a good few minutes, trying to figure out how you're going to talk to him.

"So, um-" The man in question clears his throat and smiles at you. "How much do you know?"

"The basics, kinda? Demons need human blood to survive, the sun kills them, they can regenerate quickly, and are a pain in the ass. Oh! And there's some special sword that can kill them?"

He nods along with you. "It surprises me that you know what the swords are. Did the demon tell you?"

You just nod at him, deciding against telling him that you kinda had a good short conversation with Ichijū. The feeling that it would be a bad idea was nagging at you from the back of your mind.

"He meant the 'Nichirin Sword', they are forged with Scarlet Crimson Iron Sand and Scarlet Iron. You know how that sun is the only way to kill demons, right? These Swords can constantly absorb sunlight, so decapitating a demon with it can permanently kill them. Once their neck bone is slashed by the weapon, their heads and bodies disintegrate into ash in a similar fashion to when exposed to sunlight."

You know about this already, yet while he explains it to you, he draws out his blade, showing it to and it takes your breath away. It's a standard-sized and shaped Nichirin katana but the red flame pattern along its blade is what makes it so spectacular. To see it with your own two eyes, directly before it's just wow. You can't find the right words.

"Can I?" Man, you want to hold it in your own hand, in a way, confirming that it's real and he lets you. Handing it to you, you grab it with your good arm, almost gasping as the light hit it right, making the colors shine even more brightly. Alone for such a sword you want to join.

"Before I forget, my name is Rengoku Kyoutaro."Rengoku bows his head politely at you, then looks back up again. His eyes fixed on your sparkling ones, it was a nice change to see someone being this fascinated about something. Nonetheless that such young woman shows interest in swords, and most of them avoid them like a plague. "And you are-"

"[Name]?" A voice interrupts Kyoutarou and you both snap your eyes to the newcomer. Yoriichi is standing at the door, taking in the appearance of the stranger that just stared at you intensely. He turns back to you, looking for any discomfort you may have.

"Yes, well, that's me. Nice meeting you Rengoku-san." you manage, still holding the sword while kind of gesturing to your best friend. You're a bit surprised by the way he looked at you; you think you might blush if he wasn't already looking away again. "And this is Yoriichi. Yoriichi, this is Rengoku Kyoutaro, the 'Hunter'."

"Nice to meet you Rengoku-san," he bows his head respectfully before joining you, settling himself right next to you.

"The pleasure is all mine, and well, we call ourselves 'Demon Slayer', sounds more specific." He shrugs while taking the sword from your hand and you pout. You want your own, almost as much as the Fatui coat. "Say [Name]-san, are you already familiar with the Katana?"

"Yeah, Yoriichi and I are training with it for a few years already, but he's so much better than me. Our teacher is always gushing about his model student." You answer him, smiling slightly. That's one thing you don't like about Yoriichi, he's not humble about his accomplishments.

Kyoutaro looks over at Yoriichi again, looking as though he wants to say something but doesn't. He turns his gaze back to you and asks another question: "How about you both join then?"

For Kyoutarou, he didn't need to think long about this before asking the question. Both Yoriichi and you had training, while Yoriichi looks like someone that definitely wouldn't have any problems, you on the other hand had already at least one run-in with a demon, so why not? Plus the organization lacks members.

You somewhat narrow your eyes at him, was it really that easy? Well, you shouldn't complain, it's what you wanted after all. Yet, there's still Yoriichi, he only gave you a maybe when you had the conversation, so you're nervous about his decision. As you give him a quick glance, he's already looking at you and gives you a soft smile and you instantly know what it means.

"Yes! Thank you!" You jump up in excitement. Your body practically vibrates with the sheer joy that's inside you. Yoriichi smiles at your reaction, but he isn't exactly happy about the whole situation. While you were talking to Kyoutarou he had been staring at you, probably wondering what was going on in your head.

Now that you've accepted the proposal the Slayer relaxes a little bit.

"Great,we're lacking a lot of people and the ones we do have are spread out around the country." He smiles happily, giving you an approving nod. Now that you've accepted the proposal the Slayer relaxes a little bit."But I think before you officially join, you should focus on your wounds."

Your eyes widen, and you feel like the air is sucked right out from under you. You take a deep breath and try to calm yourself down, in your excitement you almost forgot about it, plus at least you want to be present when Uta gives birth, gosh. Hopefully, that's alright.Kyoutarou must have read your mind, patting your head, "How about I come back in two months? That should be enough right?"

Once again, two months is nothing. What can you say?

Uta gave birth to a healthy baby boy, and it was an experience that made you question if you truly want to have kids someday or if you should pass. She almost broke your only functional hand and you promptly switched with Kousuke because nope, you need it soon.But, even though it made you sweat buckets and almost break your sanity to see your best friend in so much pain, it was worth it to see the newly formed family so happy as she carefully hugged her son for the very first time.Did you cry? Yes, more than you like to admit.

After a month of recovery, Uta finally got back on her feet, which made her very happy since this way she could spend more time with her son and well, with Yoriichi and you before you depart with Kyoutarou.

The day came when you had to leave, but before you did, Uta wanted to thank you one last time. You weren't expecting anything out of the ordinary from this meeting – after all, what else could Uta possibly give you at this point? But she surprised you by giving you something that you'd probably never be able to repay her enough for this.

Michikatsu's haori, which was already too small for you for quite a few years, was now newly sewn to fit your shape. Or more like, it's perfect since it is in your preferred color and the original is packed into with your belongings. She must have had a hard time finding the exact same fabric and you can't imagine how f*cking expensive it was.

"You don't need to worry about paying me back," Uta said. "It isn't just a present, it's more like a 'Thank you' for putting up with me for so many years." She was really serious about not needing to return the favor for this. You didn't know what to say in response to that, especially since you're pretty sure she doesn't even think of it as a gift or a debt being paid back, but instead, she just smiled and said: "Don't make things difficult for yourself, okay? And when you come back to visit, I hope you two will finally be honest with each other."

Your heart started pounding faster. Did Uta somehow hear your conversation with Yoriichi about the idea everyone has about you two getting married?! No, you couldn't see how that would happen. Maybe she overheard some villagers talking about it. But still, Uta was so right in a way. It would be nice for you to finally accept that you aren't just his best friend; you are something more. But then again… Meh.

Doesn't matter, what matters is the grinning woman before you, who is now holding out the haori for you to put on!

You put it over your very pale-colored kimono, paired with a black umanori-styled hakama, in fact, it's Yoriichi's old clothes but everything fits you perfectly. Even the haori is a bit loose. But despite its bulkiness, it feels light as air against your body and you're sure Uta spent hours making it just for you. You turn to Uta, whose face is shining like the sun and her smile is wider than you've ever seen before, and tell her: "I'll wear it until I die."

"Oh my…" Uta looks flabbergasted and then bursts into laughter. "No wonder no one can keep their eyes off you!" The moment she stops laughing, she grabs your hands, which makes you feel embarrassed and a little confused.

"Thank you very much for this. I'm very happy," you tell her sincerely. You mean it. You really appreciate this gift.

"You're welcome, just take care alright, I will miss you both dearly." She says and then hugs you tightly before you leave the house.

Yoriichi stands there in silence, watching as you leave the building for the last time. Then he walks over to Uta and embraces her before saying: "Thank you for everything."

Uta smiles at him and nods as tears rolldown her cheeks. And that's how it ends, in the most bittersweet way possible. You have no choice but to continue on your journey with Kyoutarou and Yoriichi, only hoping that now she will truly get her happily ever after that she deserved.

Chapter 5: ACT I • Amaranthine V

Chapter Text

Time felt extraordinarily low for Michikatsu.

It's been a decade since Yoriichi and [Name] vanished into the silence of the night, upon discovering the very next day the diary of his mother the confusion and distress turned into a fury of resentment and bitterness.

Both of them must have realized that his position was going to hand over to Yoriichi and so they planned this. It was not a spontaneous decision, it was a calculated move. They never bothered to let him in on their plans. Once again, it was something she kept once again as a secret from him, the disease his mother has been suffering from, the left side either Yoriichi or [Name] has been supporting.

That was just how insensitive both of them were, keeping to themselves with their secrets. Especially [Name], she always knew about everything, that his brother could speak and wasn't deaf, his extraordinary abilities and talents, and his mother's disease. He could already imagine what her excuse would have been: 'It was not my place to tell you.'

Not even her detailed letter could have given him any answers to the only question that haunts him since that day, why did she choose Yoriichi over him? Why did she go with him and left him alone behind, dealing with the aftermath of Yoriichi's actions? He thought that at the very least she would always stand by his side.

That moment, after reading everything over and over again, he heard the sound of his body searing with envy. From the bottom of his heart, he despised the prodigy known as his brother and grunge against his former fiancé.

Even as his father and the Ōzora household sent a search party for them, Michikatsu never let it slip to them that it was unfruitful to search at the temple, and with [Name]'s mother being the first to convince her husband to just stop, he knew that she also knew about the runaways plan. Even if he couldn't read it directly from Ōzora-san's face, she surely realized the situation when her daughter, his former fiancé went missing into the night.

The next morning, his father had a talk with Michikatsu, saying that there were no clear leads, nor any solid clues as to where they might be, but he still urged him for any clues that he might have had. But nothing. Michikatsu did say nothing, and a small part had hoped that his father would someday bring the news that Yoriichi fell off a cliff or got attacked by a bear, he just wished never to see his brother again.

But where would that leave [Name]? She would be so disappointed if she knew what Michikatsu thought day after day, for what gruesome things he wished. But who cares? She's not here, she chooses to go, yet, the image of her hurt-filled expression makes him sick, holding him in a chokehold.

He thought after everyone has given up on them, it would vanish but this feeling never left for the last ten years, it wasn't prominent, and it wasn't suffocating anymore. The only reminder was the bracelet and the letter. Nothing else reminds him of them, and as a foolish request, the only one he ever asked of his wife was to lengthen it so it would still fit his wrist.

His wife is a lovely woman, soft and delicate. She's so pure, a gentle soul but he couldn't find it himself to call this a love-fulfilling marriage. It was all just a pretense, for the sake of her reputation as a noblewoman, she had to act her part the same as he does. He had been playing along too long and pretending to be happy when deep down, he was actually bored. If someone asked if he loved his wife, he would answer with a white liel.

Even now, she's sitting there in front of him, their second son in her arms while the older one was playing in the garden with some servants. He couldn't stop himself from asking if that was it. Was this why [Name] ran away, scared that she would feel the same as him if she would have stayed? But as quick as these thoughts came he pushed them away. That's not how he should look at his wife, he just shouldn't. But that did not stop him from asking her to make the old bracelet fit his wrist, she looked almost delighted that he asked especially her and not a servant.

After a couple of days, she put it on his wrist again, it took several adjustments until it finally fitted his wrist and when it did, it felt right to wear it again. And he had been wearing it ever since, as a ghost of the past more than a bracelet, even though no one had noticed, yet his wife asked about it. He didn't want to think about it, he just wanted to forget. He didn't want to remember, he didn't want to hope.

So he told her that it was a gift from someone ages ago. They're just two figures of the past, nothing but names etched on paper in an old letter, like characters drawn in chalk on a wall. That's all they are to him now.

And yet-

He can’t bring himself to throw away the letter or the bracelet that is still tied around his wrist. He could not stop himself from wondering where they are, why [Name] didn't return after the years had passed, or if she was alive at all. The last thing Michikatsu ever wanted to hear is that she has met a terrible end, like how her parents ended up, that would break him. His heart can take only so much. Did she even know that the Ōzora household was no more? He doesn't know what happened to her brother, it's been years since he has heard from him.

"Oh, I remember you had a brother right?" Her gentle voice snaps him out of his thoughts. A gentle smile spreads across her face and she continues speaking while looking at the small bundle on her lap: "My father told me about that when he came back from the engagement navigations."

He nodded silently as he gazed at the ornament around his wrist. She smiled at him in a pleasant manner before going to the table, and he followed her. The teapot had already been filled, she poured them each a cup. She sips from her teacup, looking at him. "You know, today something peculiar happened."

Michikatsu looked out the window to look at the garden beyond, his face turned towards the sky, trying his best to muster up at least some interest, she did fulfill his request after all. After a few seconds, he couldn't help but turn his head back to her.

"What did happen?" he asked. Her eyes widened as she stared at him, she seems surprised for some reason.Yes, it was rare that he showed her this much interest.

"Today I was at the market with some servants because our son wanted to finally get out of the house," she said softly. "The boy really loves to play outside and see the different colors of flowers, and he always talks about how beautiful everything is so I have to agree with him. He was a bit too excited today andwe lost him for a few minutes!"

"Lost him?" Michikatsu said, his voice slightly louder than intended, it was almost as if he had just noticed that there was another person besides himself in the room.

"Well…yes. I was looking at a stall selling fruit when he suddenly took off. …" she paused for a moment and then continued, "I was so devasted but then suddenly this young couple brought him back and said they found him in front of a stall where there sold some candy. He seemed happy with them, but I had to look twice because he looked a bit like you."

Michikatsu's hand trembles, almost dropping the teacup.

"Luckily both of them didn't seem bothered by this fact and even brought him some sweets. Such a nice couple, especially the woman was so beautiful! And she had such a wonderful smile! I have never seen someone with [colored] hair and she looked so kind, so gentle, I wish I had invited them as a thank you." She smiled warmly.

"I'm glad our son enjoyed his day out," Michikatsu managed to say without breaking the cup in his hand, he did not know what to do with this information, his mind couldn't decide whether he should be happy or scared. He tried to remain calm, thinking of all the possible scenarios, and in conclusion: It must have been a coincidence. Nothing more. No need to worry about it.

His wife stared at him, a small sigh leaving her lips as she sipped from her teacup again.

The silence was awkward now.

It was as if the story that his wife told him weeks ago, was like precision, an indication that the accumulated time would soon begin flowing again. Faster and faster than it ever had for Michikatsu. For the last ten years, he could not once imagine that this is how they all would reunite again.

Any other night the sound of the crackling fire, the chirping of the cicada, and the light conversations of his subordinates would almost relax him but tonight the night was heavy. The wind blew hard through the encampment, a shiver runs down his spine. He can't put his finger on it, maybe it's paranoia acting up but he suddenly feels trapped. There were no guards around him and even though the camp was surrounded by twenty samurai, the feeling remained as strong.

He glanced at the sky; in a few minutes, it must be twelve o'clock. His heart beat fast, he could barely control the pounding in his ears. In just a few minutes, everything will change, a small voice tells him. One of his subordinates had said to get some rest. But he didn't have time to sleep because he needs to prepare. For what? He doesn't know.

As he stared out into the darkness, a figure slowly moved out of the shadows behind one of the trees and walked closer to the group of men surrounding the bonfire. At first, from this distance, he could have thought that it was just someone coming back from doing their business. But after the third step, Michikatsu felt goosebumps crawl down his spine.

The laughter turned into horrendous screams, he could see a head that was only a second ago still connected to one of his youngest aides now dangling from the hand of whoever attacked him, decapitated from just one yank.

His hands reached for his sword hilt but before he could draw it, another samurai ran from the darkness towards the group of men around the fire, screaming and attacking the figure. A few men tried to do the same as him but the monster ignored them. No matter how many wounds are inflicted on it, it doesn't even seem to care.

A loud noise broke out when the figure swung its claws around with such force it almost smashed right through the horde of men that fell to the ground, lifeless. Its arms were covered in the blood of his comrades and as if nothing happened, the monster looked straight into Michikatsu's eyes as he drew his sword. He doesn't know when his feet moved him to the events but it didn't flinch as Michikatsu's blade met its chest, the sword slid down effortlessly and split open its ribcage.

The creature let out a loud roar, its face was no longer mortal but instead had the appearance of a demon's mask with glowing yellow eyes. Its body grew bigger, taller, and bulkier. Spikes are growing out of its arms, three on each one. The slash on its chest healed at an inhuman speed, its skin returning to a smooth tone. It was like he saw his entire life flash by, and all because of the evil that was now in front of him.

Its face looked at him with contempt and disgust; a look of rage in its eyes, as it lifted its arms up and started swinging down with unbelievable force. Michikatsu couldn't believe how fast its movements were as if he was just watching an ant carrying something heavy. But then he remembered he was a samurai. He was trained to fight with every ounce of strength he had, with his heart burning for battle, with courage that is greater than any other warrior. So he raised his sword in defiance against his adversary and yelled with a voice louder than he ever did before.

With his sword still held high, Michikatsu's legs bent, and pushed his feet to get in close to the figure. With all the might Michikatsu had, he tried to push his foe back butit was too late.

The creature's fist landed on his left shoulder, the pain was unbearable but he kept going. It felt like he was being crushed, a thousand needles were stabbing him in the back, each one piercing through his heart. Not even the armor that he's wearing could protect him from this force. As soon as the blow landed, Michikatsu felt his bones break. His sword slipped out of his hands and he fell to the ground, his back hitting a tree.

The bonfire was going out, the last of the flames died and the moonlight illuminated what was once a lively encampment. A cold breeze blew through the clearing, and a smell of death filled the air. The only thing that was left was a few dozen dead bodies scattered around the area. Some had their heads smashed in, some had their limbs severed, and others had their insides spilled out.

Michikatsu lay on the ground, unable to move, he was paralyzed. Michikatsu didn't feel anything anymore. His head was spinning, his vision was blurred, and he couldn't move his body. He was just staring at the creature in front of him. It looked down at him and grinned, revealing its sharp teeth.

He heard the sound of a sword being drawn, followed by the loud clang of metal against metal. The monster looked up, startled, and the smile vanished. Then, with a loud cry, it threw itself toward the samurai who was fighting it. A single slash was enough to cut the creature's throat, and the night was illuminated by strong flames once again.

The corpse fell down, its eyes rolled back and blood spurted out of its mouth, as its whole being slowly turned to ash until nothing was left. Michikatsu was barely able to lift his head to see what happened. He saw the samurai who fought the demon, standing over where the corpse once lay with his sword dripping with blood.

Suddenly Michikatsu remembered one thought he had, would he even be able to recognize his brother after all these years? What if he wouldn't, what if he had already encountered him once but his mind failed him? But now, with this samurai before him that saved his life, he got his answer.

As if it was written by fate, Yoriichi stands before him. Looking down on his beaten form and all the ugly feelings of jealousy and hatred boiled up in him once again. As if it only waited for this exact moment. Michikatsu should be thankful, his life was spared, and he should be f*cking grateful for that but his mind does not let him.

"We came as soon as we could but forgive me brother that we were late." Not even as he bows down deeply before him, with a mature but soft-spoken voice, so unfamiliar but at the same time not at all. "Because of this, we couldn't save your comrades."

The 'we' flew over Michikatsu's head, he could only focus on the man before him, how strong and flawless he had become. A greedy sensation makes its way up his throat, he wants to possess the same amount of skill as him, the death of his comrades already buried deep into his mind.

Yet, that feeling vanishes the moment another shiver runs down his spine, with another scream shortly followed by the direction from behind his brother. The sound of swords slashing through a body and cries of pain echoed throughout the area. Yoriichi does not seem fazed at all, why was he not reacting in the slightest, even seemed relaxed.

His brother must be aware of what was happening. Yet, there was a calmness in his brother's eyes, tranquility that Michikatsu never thought he would ever see in his life again. A strange feeling comes over his mind. Fear, terror, dread—these three emotions he has never experienced before. And he can see it, with a hasty motion out of the shadows of the forest, comes another figure, another running from whatever it is hunting it. How could such a monster be so scared, the real threat for it is still bowing before Michikatsu, so how-?

Then it happened! Before anyone could react to it, another figure charged forward to the monster, a demon, he does not know what it is. Michikatsu didn't even have a chance to see who it was before they were upon it in one instant, a blade that shimmers in a beautiful [color] slicing through its neck, all the while a joyful giggle fills the air.

"Wow, what a wimp you were." The woman's voice is filled with mocking as the head falls to the ground, also turning to ashes as it makes contact with the muddy ground. "That was pathetic."

She kneels over the dead body, looking at it for a moment with curiosity before Yoriichi suddenly stands up, turning to her in a hurry. Obscurrying his view of her and only seeing his brothers back now.

"Are you alright?" He asks in a tone of pure worry. Where was the young child that did not even smile full-heartedly? "Any wounds?"

He walks toward where she stood a minute ago and grabs her shoulder to inspect her. She only responds with another giggle, and it makes Michikatsu's heart beat faster, but he does not dare to hope. How he wished his body would cooperate with him, to stand up and make his way over to them, to see if it was not a coincidence.

"What are you talking about? Of course, I'm fine!" Her laugh became more cheerful as if nothing happened at all. "Didn't you see how scared it was of me? Shigeo will not believe me, he's going to think I am a dirty liar when I tell him that."

"I can't say I would believe it either but you did great."Michikatsu could hear his brother letting out a sigh, before bending down to the smaller woman, wrapping his arm around her waist in an embrace, before turning back to him. Now he could finally see who it was, and he doesn't know how to react at all.

She had a long sword on her hip, which is of the highest quality that Michikatsu has seen, it was probably even better than his own.Soft [colored] hair that was tied behind her back in a ponytail, [color] eyes that glow like stars in the moonlight. She wore a white kimono with black hakama pants and Haori so familiar to his own, which made her stand out from the darkness.

His eyes drifted to her wrist, the same bracelet. The sight of the girl standing next to his brother gave Michikatsu chills; she looks nothing like she did when she was only seven. But then again, he should have expected this, after all, time cannot change people completely. It just changed their outward appearance, making her look so much more mature.

The two stared into each other's eyes for some moments, eyes wide until she run over to him. He almost thought that she would throw herself at him, the same as she did when they were young with a snarky comment but she drops before him, kneeling down in front of him instead.

"Michikatsu, I would love to say I am glad to see you again but you look like sh*t, are you hurt somewhere?" Her face looked worried as she searched hurriedly for any wounds before she turns back to Yoriichi. "Yoriichi?"

A frown formed across the woman's lips, she knew something was wrong between these two siblings. Why else would she ask such a question? But there's no way she could have instantly known of Michikatsu's thoughts about his brother, still, it made him gulp. Yoriichi looks at her long again before responding, "His left shoulder is wounded."

"Why is it always the left side, I am starting to see a pattern." She turns back to Michikatsu, her eyes unreadable for him, "Does it hurt bad? Can you stand?"

Her words caused him to freeze, his mind racing. His mind goes blank for a second before he nods quickly. "Yes, I can walk..."

It takes all his willpower not to fall onto his knees and beg for help, he needs to do this himself, he has to show them that he is capable enough. That he is strong enough even after such an encounter, it was childish but he feels as if they are all children again, standing in the Tsugikuni backyard instead of a death-filled forest.

"Good, we need to tend your wound before anything else," She said as she tried to help Michikatsu up and for a moment it seems as if he would take her hand before abruptly turning away. Rejecting her help. Her eyes widened in disbelief, as though someone punched her in the gut but then she sighs, "Well, alright. Then let's get out of here, we have much to discuss right?"

Yoriichi smiles softly at [Name] before nodding once more, taking the lead.

"Demons?"

Michikatsu whispers under his breath, feeling uneasy under your piercing gaze as you inspect his injuries, while Yoriichi explained to him what these things were that attacked him. It was surreal, any other day he probably would have dismissed this as a dumb children's story but after what he witnessed, there was no other explanation.

Demons are real; that much he knew now. He was not about to make light of their existence or deny his experiences after that night.

"Yes, trust me it sounds stupid but I had a similar encounter with one months ago." You answer his whisper, pulling up your sleeve to reveal to him a bad-looking scar in the shape of a bite mark, the small gift you got from Ichijū. It is still more of a bittersweet memory than a horrendous experience. "I was lucky that I only got some scars. Since then Yoriichi and I joined the Demon Slayers."

"And you?" He turns his gaze to his brother, who is silently watching you work on bandaging Michikatsu's shoulder. "Were you with her when it happened?"

"No." His voice seemed hollow to Michikatsu's ears, almost as though he was holding something back and you know why, this was still a sour topic for him. Every time he sees your scars he starts to frown or apologize for not being there. You can only smile at him, telling him over and over again that it's alright. "I was on my to bring a midwife back home, when I came back the demon was already dead and [Name] told me what happened."

Good times. Doesn't even feel as if it's been almost a year since that happened.

"Wait- Midwife?" You almost jump at how loud Michikatsu's voice got, his eyes jumping from your surprised ones to Yoriichi's calm ones. "You both have-"

"No! We don't have children or anything. Uta, the girl we lived with was pregnant." His words made you stop whatever you were doing before sputtering, a deep blush rising to your cheeks in embarrassment. You pull the bandage tighter, hopefully, it will hurt him.

Michikatsu stares at you dumbfounded, his mind racing with the information you just revealed. He almost sighed loudly in relief as his brother chuckles at your red face.

"When we, you know, ran away, we met her. Her parents died because of a disease so I asked her if we can live with her. Since then we all lived together until she married and got pregnant. One night suddenly Ichi-uh, a demon came, and well, now we are here."You explain as you finish up, stepping away from Michikatsu who stared at you a bit too intensely.

He grow up fine, like holy sh*t, if you weren't around Yoriichi every day and developed some kind of immunity, you would simp. Hard, without any shame, whatsoever. Women must have thrown themselves at him, there's no way they didn't. Wait- Is he married now, since originally you should have been his wife?

"Say Michikatsu, what about you? How has life been treating you?"

You have an inkling, after seeing his passive-aggressive eyes as he watched Yoriichi in the forest, that his feelings towards him did not change. Was it wrong to hope that even though he would not join the Demon Slayers? It would suck to say goodbye again but it's better than feeding into his dark thoughts and feelings. Right now, you aren't confident enough to say he wouldn't take Muzan's offer.

His mouth was slightly agape before he finally answers, "I got married and have two children-"

Whatever he's saying is going into one ear and out of the other, as long as Yoriichi pays attention, which he definitely will because it's his brother, he will tell you later. So, the same as canon, which to be fair can also be a coincidence but you would feel better if it was one or ten children.

What if- you weren't the original wife of Michikatsu, what if the original Ōzora [Name] should have actually died when she fell from the tree, and that's why she was never seen in their childhood? You frown deeply, trying to remember all the information about them from the manga, but ugh- nothing is there that will help you at all. The only thing you have is two panels from his wife and children, and that's it.

Thanks for nothing Gotouge. That's why you are at an annoying disadvantage when it comes to your goal number three. If you have known that this mission was the one involving Michikatsu, you would not have given in to your daily bickering with Shigeo and could have at least saved some of the others.

Yet, how could you have known? This mission was originally assigned to someone else until Master told you last minute otherwise.

You sigh heavily and shake your head to clear your mind. Whatever, it's not even important, what's important is if he wants to join or not. If he does not want to, then you can just leave it alone. You turn around with your arms folded in front of you, frowning at both Yoriichi and Michikatsu and you hear exactly that one thing you don't want to hear at all.

"You want to join brother?"

You turn to Yoriichi, giving him your best 'f*ck, NO. HOW ABOUT NO' eyes but of course, apparently you're not good at them because he only tilts his head at you.

"Yes." Michikatsu's answer made both Yoriichi and you exhale sharply in surprise. "I want to join."

Your eyes widen as you stare at him incredulously, not able to move from your spot. Why- why would he do such a thing? You know why, you were right. He has the mindset of Yoriichi is better than him and wants his strength to even surpass him. A decade ago, you had more sympathy and an understanding, you still do, but now? You are disappointed, not even angry.

"Well, that has to wait." You can't mask the bitterness in your voice, Yoriichi was quick to put a hand on your shoulder squeezing it as you continue, "You are not gonna join with your shoulder."

"It's fine, it'll be healed in a few days anyway." Michikatsu's eyes meet yours, and you know that he can see your disapproval about this whole thing, now you're the one done with this bullsh*t. How the tables have turned, huh?

"I am sorry but you should rest before even considering joining, let the pain pass so it doesn't become infected or anything." You stand up straight, shaking off Yoriichi's hand as you start to walk away, "Yoriichi will show you where to sleep. I will be going for a walk."

"Hey! Where are you going? What do you-" Before Michikatsu can finish his sentence, Yoriichi grabs his arm tightly as you leave in frustration.

"Don't worry. I will be back." You glare at Yoriichi, hoping to convey that you are a tiny bit upset with him but he only smiles back at you kindly and gives you a reassuring smile, as you keep walking away in silence.

"[Name]?"

You come out of your daydreaming, glancing at Yoriichi who seems concerned about something as he speaks. It's been a few weeks since your reunion with Michikatsu. You are both at the edge of the city where the Tsugikuni household is located, waiting for him to show up and escort him to the Demon Slayer headquarters.

"Oh, yes?" Your brow wrinkles as you look at him curiously, "What is wrong?"

"I wanted to talk with you." Yoriichi takes a deep breath and lets it out slowly, "What do you truly think about brother joining us?"

You blink at him blankly, unsure how to answer that question. You really don't want to answer him honestly. You don't want him to be disappointed or upset because he's always been happy since Michikatsu will be a permanent part of his life again, well hopefully.

"To be honest, I am not that delighted about it." You sigh, grabbing his hand as you try to explain yourself, "One part of me is happy that we three are going to be together again but he is leaving his life behind for it, his wife and children..."

You still did not make your peace with the fact that he's going to join, it's not that you don't want him around you but, you don't know how to feel about the fact that he's literally abandoning his wife and children. And for what? Because of envy? You don't know yet, in the end, he's an adult, who can make his own decisions and you feeling angry and sulky about it will not change it.

"I know..." Yoriichi whispers lowly, his thumb rubbing against your knuckles as his eyes search yours. "But we are also his family, and I don't think brother will leave them for good. He will visit them and maybe even introduce them to us."

You feel warm inside at those words but you still feel the anger burning in your veins. No matter how much you wished for it to be true, Michikatsu's eyes told another story. If the circ*mstances were different, you would have shrugged it off, but it feels too personal and even though it's been ages, he is still important to you. Sadly.

"Maybe so," you murmur, what else can you say? "If it's what he wants, then he should decide whether he will or not."

"I agree." Yoriichi's lips twitch into a smile and you laugh lightly before he pulls you closer to him, "I am glad that we three can be together again. It's been so long."

"True, but I have a feeling not much has changed since then."

You bite your lower lip as you look up at him, rolling your eyes. Well, if Michikatsu is going to be a dick, you will beat his ass, and messing with him will going to be once again you're favorite pastime. Yoriichi wraps his arms around your waist as you lean into him, smiling softly.

After a few minutes, all three of you are reunited again and a very awkward journey to the headquarter began. Will you survive hours of this heavy silence?

This seems familiar though.Yoriichi on your right side, hand tightly holding onto yours, and Michikatsu on your left side, having probably his nasty thoughts.Was it too late to just abandon everything and live a long life as a peasant? Yes, it was. If you thought Yoriichi would ever let you go, you thought wrong. He would throw his Nichirin blade into Kyoutarou's face and wish him good luck, maybe.

Doesn't matter, since you're stuck here.You just want to go home, throw yourself onto your futon and call it a day. Maybe ask for a raise because you do not get paid enough for this.And no- it wasn't a joke. You will ask for one, you earned it.

"Anything I should know before we arrive?" The older twin asks, apparently also a bit uncomfortable with the silence. There's no way he's truly interested, or is he? That would be a pleasant surprise.

"Nothing special, Masters is informed and approved already." You murmur in response as the wind blows by your cheek gently. Yoriichi's hand squeezes yours, he wants you to be nice, that traitor. "Otherwise, I don't know, there are only a few members that are worthy of mentioning."

"Is that so?" Michikasu raises an eyebrow, his voice sounding interested. "What about them?"

"Well, first, there's Rengoku Kyoutarou." you murmur, "He's the one that recruited us, his family already served the organization for a few generations. He is very friendly and helps where he can. Doesn't matter if it's about training or anything else. He's always busy so when he does have some time, it's worth spending."

"Hmm." hemuses. "That's good to know."

"Also, there's Suzukaze Shigeo. He is like my nemesis," Or how you call him lovingly in your head, Proto-Sanemi, now that you think about it, there are quite a few where you thought these have to be the ancestors of some of the Hashirathemself before reincarnation. Who knows?

"He's the one that attempted to give me a good beating after I tried to give him some tips, not sure why but he's a nice guy, actually a good friend who really cares about me. We are bickering every day but if I ever need him, he's there."

Michikatsu hums softly and you can hear Yoriichi laugh softly at your description of the Wind-user. You look over at him and he smiles slightly before turning back to the road, watching the path ahead. You take a deep breath before continuing your monologue, hoping that he doesn't lose interest during all of it.

"Then there's Hirayama Ryougo," You continue, looking at the other two in turn, "He is a quiet guy that prefers not to talk much so I don't see him that often, but when I do, we usually just sit down and play with the stray cats. Oh, and he's tall, like taller than you two."

Michikatsu glances over at his brother who answers his silent question, "Yes, he is quite tall. If I am not mistaken he is around 7'2" and a very skilled swordsman."

You smile widely at his reaction, astonishment is written on his face.

"And then we have Mizumoto Eiyuu," You stop for a moment and breathe deeply. "He is also a former samurai from his old village, super quiet, and has some sort of silent rivalry with Shigeo. They don't seem to get along but I am guessing it's a professional rivalry and they respect each other. He's a good teacher as well, he taught me a lot."

You look at the other two and you can feel them waiting for you to continue. Why Yoriichi was so invested, you don't know, so you just shrug it off.

"Last but not least is Atsuma Kuwajima," You mutter quietly as you look over at Michikatsu. "He is like the mother hen from our group. He keeps an eye out for us and makes sure we rest properly. He's also super clever, and a very good strategist but more importantly, he is so divine at cooking. I love his food, I would kill for it."

You chuckle a bit before you look down at your hands, trying to hide the blush that is creeping up on your cheeks. What a weird topic for you to describe people in! You didn't realize it but you had been talking nonstop for quite some time, you were getting tired but you couldn't help it. You hold these people dear to you, they were like a family to you even though it was a long way.

Your thoughts are interrupted by Michikasu laughing softly.

"You've become quite chatty lately," he says softly, looking at you with a small smile. "But I am glad that you found such good people, I can't wait to meet them."

"I hope you will like them as much as we do." You murmur back to him, "They are amazing, right Yoriichi?"

The other twin nods, "Indeed, it is never boring with them. You will probably meet them either upon our arrival or the next day."

Michikasu looks over at his brother who answers him with a simple nod of his own. You grin to yourself, cheerful to see them finally again and boy, you hope Shigeo teams up with you into annoying the living sh*t out of Michikatsu. That would be nice.

"Anyway," you sigh, "there are a few other things that you should know about the whole thing. We all live fairly close to the headquarter since the communication sucked ass before they started working on the Kasugai Crow system, and since you will live with us, don't be surprised about the others coming and going like they own the place."

In a meeting, it may have slipped from your lips that it would be so much better to have some kind of bird that would deliver the messages quicker, it was just a jab in right the direction. You didn't know the Head of the Ubuyashiki would directly start with the project after hearing how intelligent crows are. Well, now history may remember you as[Name], the first woman in the Demon Slayer organization and the one responsible for the great communication. Or not, since the corps are a secret so, jokes on you.

Michikasu blinks slowly but he listens intently, his expression serious. He must be thinking about something important. After a minute, he speaks up again, "I will live with you two?"

"Of course?" You say, shaking your head lightly. That's what he focused on and not the great crows?Didn't Yoriichi tell him? Why are you always the bearer of such important information? Seriously, you suck at such things. "We have enough rooms, or do you want to sleep outside? I don't care."

"It is no trouble for us," Yoriichi joins in, wanting his brother to live with you two. He almost gave you puppy eyes when he brought up that idea to you. "Since we are family, it only made sense."

Michikatsu slowly nods, coming to terms with his fate. If only he knew how chaotic it can be to live with Yoriichi and you. Everyone is shocked about this fact, they thought you two would more on the quiet side since Yoriichi was the definition of calmness and inner peace. Well, not you, definitely not you. You could be a pain in the ass sometimes, but Yoriichi doesn't seem to care, so you will also not care.

It was this simple.

Michikatsu is standing at the top of the hill near the headquarters building, gazing down at the beautiful landscape in front of him.

The weather was perfect and sunny, but the sun was too bright and merciless for you to enjoy any view you have seen too many times.You almost cried at the familiar sight in front of you, f*cking finally you're home. The other members have been waiting for your arrival for quite a while now, you see them waving at you from across the courtyard, it warms your exhausted heart.

"Welcome back!" You hear a voice call out as your favorite trash Shigeo runs up to you, wearing a mocking smile on his face. "What took you so long? We have been waiting for ages, and what about you [Name]? You look as if you're on the edge of death."

You sigh, swatting his hand away that has been poking your cheek. "You know me, from the womb to the tomb, exhausted. Anyway, we are back with the new promising member."

"As long as you're not dying before me." Shigeo snickers before he looks around, his expression changing into a serious one. "Welcome back Yoriichi, and welcome uh- Michikatsu, right?"

The twins both bow in greeting before Michikatsu answers, "Thank you. I am glad to be here."

He smiles politely at all of them, when you arrived where the others have been waiting, it's kind of sweet of them. A chorus of 'Welcome back' echoes through the courtyard, but you don't see Ubuyashiki-sama. Good, that gives you the hope that the meeting is tomorrow and you can finally sleep.

You already take a step in the direction of your estate, when suddenly someone grabs you by the collar, holding you back from reuniting with your super soft futon. Your eyes widen and you gasp lightly, the only thought that comes to your mind was someone clearly wants to catch these hands today.

"[Name] I know where you want to go but no." It's Kyoutarou, betrayal always comes from your closest friends huh? Tragic. "We have a meeting soon."

"Oh my God..." You sigh, struggling against his death grip before he picks you up like a misbehaving cat. "You want me to go to a meeting? The same thing that killed Julius Ceasar? Why not stab me 23 times right here and nowand be done with it."

Kyoutarou laughs softly, he looks amused. Does he even know what you are talking about?His hands squeeze down on your waist more, and you try to kick him but he doesn't give up, his grip just gets tighter and then just lets you fall to the ground. Shigeo openly laughs at your misery and you can even hear Eiyuu letting out a soft chuckle.

Yoriichi comes to your rescue, pulling you up and patting down any dirt. Did you say you were glad to see them again? You take that back. They are dirty traitors.

After your arrival, everything happens so fast. Michikatsu is now officially a member of the Demon Slayers. Yay, who would have thought?

He has become good acquaintances, or you dare to even say friends with the others. Everyone was excited to have another Tsugikuni in their group, which you get it. Yoriichi is after all the one that teaches everyone different Breathing Techniques, the corps actually hit jackpot with him as a member. Of course, they would be delighted to have his twin brother join.

Michikatsu finally realized that living with Yoriichi and you were not as quiet and peaceful as he hoped. You didn't lie when you said that the others are treating it as if it's their own home.

One morning, when you still blissfully slept away your responsibilities, cuddled up in Yoriichi's comfy embrace, Shigeo thought that he has not the patience to wait for your lazy ass to wake up. You promised to train with him after all. Well, that time he was serious with his threat to drag you out of your home.

You open your eyes slowly, stretching your body, and whine lightly. Your first reaction was to close your eyes again and bask in the warmth but you stop when you realize that there is someone else in the room beside you and Yoriichi. You look up, surprised by this sudden intrusion.

"Oh-ho." You give him a nervous smile, "What's up Shigeo? You don't look happy, wanna join? It's comfy, who even needs training am I right?"

That was the wrong thing to say, the next thing you know is that he grabbed your leg, pulling you out of your safe haven into the harsh and cold world. You yelp loudly, trying to kick him with your other leg to no avail. How does he manage to dodge that? That screams witchcraft, let this loser burn at the stake.

The loud noise must have woken up Yoriichi, watching the scene unfold in front of him before finally asking, "What did she do this time?"

"Nothing Yoriichi, this midget promised to train with me but didn't show up on time." He answers nonchalantly, trying to pick you up but you hiss at him, "So I will drag her out, I don't care anymore."

"Alright, I will see you both later." WHAT. WHAT. WHAT. Yoriichi turned back to sleep as if you aren't being basically kidnapped right before his eyes. But before he completely turns away from you he says, "You should keep your promises [Name]."

Hanging from his shoulder like a ragdoll, you can only wield for now. Shigeo grins at you as if he won. He may win the fight but he will lose the war, you're making sure of that, but nice of him to pick up your stuff, you can't run around in only your sleepwear which was a kimono but still.

When Shigeo exit the bedroom with you, Michikatsu is standing at the door having witnessed the whole spectacle. He was so confused, why is no questioning whatever just happened, was this normal? Wait- Shigeo is not even bewildered by the fact that Yoriichi and you slept in the same room? Poor boy, you don't care.

"W-what are you looking at?" You ask, feeling embarrassed by how much of an idiot you were making out to be. But why should you even be? It's only Michikatsu, you both tried to beat each other up over some cookies when you were kids. He should know that this is standard behavior.

"Nothing." The older twin replied, he really doesn't know what to say, that's his life now. "Just nothing."

Shigeo abruptly turns to him, almost dropping you in the process if it weren't for your firm grip on his clothes. That was on purpose, you know it, you're awake for five minutes and he used every change to make you feel miserable.

"Let me give you some advice, do not trust her when she promises you something. Especially not when it comes to appointments in the morning." The trash tells him, making you seem like some unreliable person, when in fact- Well, it is true. "That girl is terrible when it comes to waking up, always has been."

You can't see Michikatsu's reaction but you swear he's nodding. He knows that you're not reliable even though everyone seems to think you are. To give credit, you are reliable, when it comes to important things, everyone can rely on you on missions.

"See this ass right here?" Shigeo asks, pointing at your rear end, "This is the ass of a failure. Do not trust at all."

“You aren't a failure [Name].”

“Thank you,Yoriichi.” You reply, feeling warm inside, he still cares even though he betrayed you a few moments ago.

Shigeo gives him a deadpan before leaving the estate in a huff. It always felt good when Yoriichi tries his best so that no one destroys your self-esteem. But as much as it would pain you to admit it, there is truth in Shigeo's words; you need to get it together and keep your promises.

Michikatsu stares after Shigeo until he's finally disappeared from his sight, and then he turns his gaze back to Yoriichi. “Is that normal?”

"Yes, but don't get the wrong idea. I'm sure he didn't mean any harm." Yoriichi said as he puts his hands behind his head. "It's just the way he is, and he would never hurt [Name] on purpose. If he didn't care he wouldn't be so fixed on spending time with her.”

After being dragged around like a sack of potatoes, you decide to give in. It was terrible, as in, you want to die.

He took you to different training grounds around the area and made you do various things ranging from running laps to sparring. He's been hard on you but he wasn't in the mood to let up, you can tell he was furious for the first two hours but after that, everything was forgotten.

Still, you were on the verge of collapsing, you didn't even have any breakfast for f*cks sake. The only thing keeping you going is the hope that you can go back home and sleep in Yoriichi's warm embrace once more but nope. You don't get what you want.Instead of sleeping once more, Yoriichi decided to take your place as Shigeo’s training partner. They started with basic footwork before moving on to the basics of sword fighting.

You watch the entire thing unfold, sitting on the veranda with some delicious mochi that Kyoutarou bought for you. Seriously, the only reason you are still awake was the tasty food and the more appetizing sight before you.

Who would be insane enough to miss the chance to see a shirtless Yoriichi and Shigeo? Not you.

Yoriichi seems to take it easy on Shigeo, making sure to keep his distance whenever Shigeo was trying tostrike him. Shigeo does his best to match him despite how much faster Yoriichi moves than he is used to. What a sight to behold, you're so lucky to be alive to witness it.

From the corner of your eye, you can see that Michikatsu is approaching you, being back to his ‘serious’ self. He gives you a small nod before he sits down beside you.

"Is that what you're doing all day, watching Yoriichi train?” He ask, raising an eyebrow at how intensely you stared at them.

Yoriichi? Is Shigeo just air for him? How rude,you almost felt slightly guilty, but not really. No way will you ever feel this way for enjoying yourself, it's not your fault that they are running around like this before you. In fact, your inner Simp is very grateful.

"No, but it's always nice to see them train, I'm just enjoying the show." You say simply, grinning as you glance over at him."Why not join them though?”

"You genuinely have no shame.” He looks so done already, and you love every second of it. You never realized it but in a way you missed it.

"Not even a little bit.” You laugh lightly at his expression and then take another bite of your mochi. Michikatsu sighs loudly and you look up at him, feeling a bit proud of yourself.

"What's wrong?" You ask innocently. "I thought you would want to watch them, why else would you be here?”

The other boy gives you an annoyed glance before he replies, "I guess. It is strange to see Yoriichi holding a sword when I still clearly remember him saying he does not like the feeling of hitting people.”

"That's my fault, I kind of forced him when I wanted to learn the way of the sword." You reply, trying to cheer him up."How long have you been training with him now?"

"Just a few days now." The older brother answers, watching the boys continue their sparring.

"And how is it going? Can you already use Total Concentration?“ You ask genuinely curious while glancing back at the boys who seemed to be having fun.

Michikatsu chuckles softly at the idea of you being for once interested in him and his progress before he answers, "Yes. Soon we will start with the Breathing Techniques.”

"Seriously?! Are you kidding me? Do you know how long it took me to learn it? Months, almost a goddamn year!” You almost drop your mochi but you manage to keep it in your hands, looking back at Michikatsu, surprised.That's something you truly did not expect at all. You knew that Michikatsu was talented even more so than the others but still. Only a few days? That's insane.

He is so mistaken, not only is Yoriichi favored but he is too, it's a bit upsetting that he can't see it.

“You are amazing Michikatsu.” You mumble so softly, still in complete awe at his capabilities and you are not sure if he even heard you at all.

His expression changes ever so slightly.It could easily be missed by anyone else but you somehow manage to catch it. His eyes widen for a moment before he frowns and you can't help but wonder why. Does he not believe you?Is that why he reacted like that?

“Is that so?” The tone of voice makes you feel awkward as if he wants to ask something else.Hesounds almost disappointed.

"I'm sorry." You say quickly, taking a bite from your mochi.There wasn't a reason to apologize, but it felt like the right thing to do.

Or perhaps you have plenty of reasons to apologize.‘I am sorry for keeping all these things from you, I am sorry for not telling you about your mother, I am sorry for only standing beside Yoriichi and not you. I am sorry for leaving you behind, all alone.’

Michikatsu doesn't reply and that's probably for the best because your throat is starting to hurtfrom holding back these thoughts.

"Ithink Ihaveto go now. Thank you forjoining me.” You say to Michikatsu and stand up, ready to leave.

“Tell me, [Name]-”He saysquietly, grabbing your hand before you can move away.

"Hm?" You blink confusedly as Michikatsu stares into your eyes,searching for something, you don't know what buthis handis still wrapped around yours.

"Why-” He starts but soon after he lets a sigh, “Why don't you stay here? It's been a while since it was only us two.”

The smile on his face doesn't reach his eyes, and you know that this is not what he wanted to ask you. But it's true since you all arrived at the headquarters, Michikatsu and you were never alone.The only person who ever spent time with him alone was Yoriichi and you've been busy dealing with Shigeo's messor helping Eiyuumost of the day.

You hesitate for a moment, not knowing if you should agree or not but then you notice Michikatsu's gaze drifting down to yourconnected hands before he looks up again, staring into your eyes.He's waiting for your reply, hoping fora yes.You turned away from him a decade ago, in a sense, rejected him.That is what he must have felt the night when you ran away and didn't look back.

You take a deep breath and turn around to face Michikatsu once more, smiling gently as yousqueeze his hand.

"You are right. It's been a very long time right?" You say as you sit down next to him,offering him one of your sacred mochis.

“A very long time.”Michikatsu smiles softly at you but still, something feels off. "We shoulddo that more often. We can eat together like this, and talk.”

"Sounds like fun." You murmur in agreement, watching as Yoriichi comes over with a wooden sword in his hand, Shigeo hot on his trail.

The sight of his bare chest has youchoking on your mochi. How dare he, you know it's on purpose,he knows exactly how much of a distraction his body is and how much of an impact it can have onyou.Michikatsu pats your back, as you try to get your act together. Dear lord, first the weird situation with the older twin and how the younger one? Someone, please, have mercy on your poor soul.

“You are blushing [Name].” Yoriichi raises an eyebrowat yourreactionbut you can hearthehint of smugness. "Are you feeling well?"

“I am not blushing. That's for losers, Uta and Shigeo.” You shake your head at him and he laughs.

"What this? Are you that fascinated by my body [Name]?” Of course, Shigeo just has to use the opportunity to make you mad. It's not every day he witnessesyourblushy cheeks. “I am flattered but stop it, orsomebody could get the wrong idea.”

“Yeah, no, I wouldn't touch it even with a stick.”You shoot back, giving himan innocent smile. “But it's ok, at least you tried.”

Even Michikatsu snorts at this. It feels good to laugh withYoriichi andhim, it's like old times again.Even if it's at the cost of Shigeo’s pride.Before he can pummel you to the dirty ground,Kyoutarou turns around the corner and that can only mean one thing.

"Shigeo, [Name] you both have a mission!" Kyoutarou says cheerfully and then stops mid-step as he noticesyou holding back fromgiggling atShigeo and him that close to hurling you across the whole backyard for real.

"NO!" Shigeo protests with wide eyes.

Meanwhile,you let out a loud“YAY!”

Once again you're sitting on the veranda of your estate, watching the Tsugikuni twins. You want to witness how the older twin will come up with his own Breathing Technique, not because you are some good person that wants to cheer him on but because you want to learn it too. 'Moon Breathing', first of all, it's super pretty, second nobody else besides Michikatsu could master it in canon. So your petty ass wants to prove him wrong.

Slowly it turns into a daily occurrence with you sitting in the shade and just watching, but sadly without any mochi, and now shirtless men before you. Damn it, maybe next time. At least you're not alone. Eiyuu and Kuwajima joined you, also curious about how the whole training will turn out.

"Are you still sulking [Name]?" A voice asks beside you, Eiyuu, it's a genuine question but you can detect the slight amusem*nt in his tone.

"Of course," You answer flatly while staring at the two brothers, the older one is currently preparing himself for another attempt by taking deep breaths. "Shigeo is trash but this time he was the worst. Mocking me for not having my own Breathing Technique."

It is not because you couldn't learn one, if you wanted you could have already mastered 'Water Breathing' for example but man, as you said, you want to learn 'Moon Breathing'. If Michikatsu wouldn't have joined that's another case but he is here, so you want it plus, it's not like as if you exactly need some fancy moves with the illusion of Wind to behead a demon. If you remember correctly Genya didn't have one and he was still great, so f*ck you Shigeo.

"I'd say it's more like he's upset," Eiyuu says after a moment of silence, Kuwajima nods in agreement, both looking at you curiously.

"Upset? Isn't he always grumpy about something though?" Well not always but they get what you mean. He can be impulsive, and not think about the long-term consequences. That's why he has a scar on his lips. That idiot, he wanted to show Eiyuu that he was better than him, and the next thing you know his face was bloody.

Kuwajima shakes his head, "No, I think he meant something else. Didn't you reject his offer in teaching you the Wind Breathing?"

You frown, "Well… Yes. He wanted to teach me a Wind Breathing technique but I thought it was a bad idea since we all know what happened last time. You know, we can't always repair the estate, we aren't that rich."

"He never understood that, if anything he should thank you for refusing him." The Thunder user laughs slightly at the memory, "I'm sure it would have made things worse than they already were. But anyway, I think he means that he's upset that you rejected him. It's obvious, you might not be able to see it but he is very sensitive when it comes to you. Aren't you two like 'Best Friends' or something?"

You shrug, "Maybe, but he's not my best friend. I only tolerate him and his flat ass."

Eiyu sighs, "I don't understand. He's acting like an idiot, there's nothing wrong in rejecting someone. Especially if they are annoying and a simpleton."

"Yeah yeah, we know Eiyuu, you are his other victim. Makes me almost glad that he only comes to me when he wants food."

"He would never dare to. His love for your Ohagis is bigger than his weird complexes." You pat Kuwajima's shoulder. "And if he's ever mean to you, just tell me. I will murder him on our next mission, no one will know."

"That's why you are my favorite." Both chuckle, Kuwajima looks even a bit thankful, "I will bring you some later."

"Oh my, thank you." You chuckle as well, Kuwajima's smile is so cute, you could just eat him up. When you look back at the twins, you can see Michikatsu's annoyed expression and Yoriichi who is trying to encourage his brother to try again.

Ah, that is definitely not fun to watch. It is no secret that nobody managed to master 'Sun Breathing', everyone tried but it's too much for their bodies. Not even you attempted to learn it, why should you when you knew you would fail miserably, you can't even imagine how Michikatsu must feel right now.

You sigh deeply, "This sucks."

"Michikatsu seems to be getting frustrated," Kuwajima states, "It seems not even he can masterit."

"I'm surprised he keeps trying," You mutter, "We all know how f*cking annoyingly it is to even attempt to learn it. No matter how good of a teacher Yoriichi is."

"Exactly," Eiyu agrees, "Still, I don't think he has given up yet. Maybe he will come up with a new Breathing Technique though?"

"I doubt it," Kuwajima shrugs, "He is stubborn, and he doesn't seem to be aware of the fact that he is failing. He just wants to be better than Yoriichi, that's all."

You gasp in shock, is he also a legendary Tsugikuni whisperer?Probably not. He is just really observant and can read people well. Sometimes a bit too well, but you're glad that you're not the only one whonoticed the heavy atmosphere around the twins.

But he is wrong about one thing, Michikatsu will create his own Technique and you will be there to witness it. Should you push him in that direction? You don't know how long he will try and try again before he will move on from this. You shake your head.

"No, I think he will come up with one soon." Both raise an eyebrow at you. "And then I will learn it."

"Shigeo will throw a fit when he hears that." Eiyuu is getting a headache, this will only end in chaos.

"Then I will beat him up with my beautiful new Breathing Technique." You give them both a thumbs up, smiling widely.

The day passes by and you continue to sit and watch the twins train.

You don't know what is going through their heads, maybe they are also thinking about what they will do from now. It was almost nighttime when they finally stopped, Yoriichi does not look exhausted at all, Michikatsu on the other side tries his best to hide it, yet you can see that he was breathing more heavily.

"I am gonna wash up," Yoriichi informs you, giving you a quick kiss on your head, "I will see you later."

Your eyes glance over towards the older one, Michikatsu is sitting down beside you and starts to wipe his forehead, while Yoriichi runs off into the house. What a mess. You sigh, leaning back on your hands. You don't know if he'll be okay. He can't keep that up for much longer, it is physically impossible for anyone.

"So, how is it going?" You question, even though you know the answer but you are forcing yourself to sound cheerful instead of concerned.

"Not very well," Michikatsu answers flatly, turning to you. "I don't understand why."

"Well, nobody can master the technique as skillful as Yoriichi." You give him a soft smile, "From what I witnessed and heard Yoriichi always tweaked the technique when he tried to teach others since nobody could handle the strain that it puts on the body and thus made up of their individual weaknesses. That's why there are currently five other Breathing Techniques, you know, Stone, Water, Wind, and so on. They all are diverted from hisSun Breathing."

"Hm, no, I did not try the Sun Breath. It's embarrassing to admit but I have never even tried to master one."

He tilts his head, "Why?"

"It sounds stupid but I don't like them. They just seem wrong for me to use, and it's not like I have that much of a disadvantage." You just shrug, before starting to grin at him, hoping he will take your hint. "If you come up with one, I will learn and even master it."

"And what makes you think I would teach you?" His voice is light, but his expression is serious. "Having you as a student doesn'tsound appealing to me.”

You feel your cheeks flush,genuinely surprised at his statement, who wouldn't want you as a student? "Excuse me? What's wrong with me, then?"

"Nothing, nothing." He shakes his head, "Butit's almost adorable how convinced you are."

He did not just say ‘adorable’ right? You must have misheard him, Michikatsu doesn't seem like the type to even think about such a word.

“You know I will just annoy you until you yield.”You let out a small giggle and pat hisshoulder, "Or are you scared you can't teach me? It's ok, we all can't be good at everything."

"Do I look like someone who isafraid?" He answers with asigh, once again done with you.

“I do remember how scared you were of me when you ruined one of my books when we were kids though. You avoided me for a week!”

"That was because youalwaysh*t me in the face!"

"Yes, yes,youdeserved that punch." You chuckle, "A smallgirlhittingthe almighty Michikatsuin the face, that's pretty funny."

He scoffs at you, but soon clears his throat and turns back to the garden. "I will consider it.”

You take this as a good sign. The guy has definitely been working hard. You decide to go inside and grab some food, seeing as you haven't eaten anything yet today.

After you have finishedpreparing some food, you walk towards the door and open it. Noticing that Michikatsu isn'ton the verandaanymore. You close the door behind you and wonder where he might've gone. Maybe he went to his room or something?Whatever, not your problem anymore and it means more food for you.

Asyou leave the veranda, you hear footsteps approach you. You turn around and seeYoriichistanding there, his arms crossed.

"What are you doing here?" You ask, taking a step back as he approaches you, making sure you don't get any closer to him.No, you don't want to share, for once you wanna be able to say no to his face.

"I wanted to talk to you." He utters calmly, his gaze boring into yours.“Don’t worry, I'm not hungry.”

"About what?" Youlet out a sigh, what an angel, he knows you so well.

He guides you into the estate, wanting to have some sort of privacy and you can't complain. The thought of food and your futon makes you delighted. Evenwatching these two training all day made you exhausted.

"It is about brother." Yoriichi glances at the closed door behind you. "He seems frustrated and distant.”

Plopping down on your soft futon, you simply nod "Yeah, I mean, it is frustrating. He tried to master your technique and just couldn't. I would feel the same.”

Yoriichi continues to stare at you, "You know, I am actually happy. It shows that he isstilltrying tobecome better and better. Just as when we were kids. In fact, I admire him for that."

"Really?"Poor boy, even Kuwajima noticed Michikatsu’s real intention but well, who knows? Youcouldalso be wrong.

"Yes, really." Yoriichi moves to sit beside you,his legs touching yours. "PerhapsI should also make changes for him, I thought since we were twins he could master it.”

You glance at him, "I don't think anyone in this era will ever masterit as skillfully asyou.”

"Is that so?" His tone is curious, but his eyes are focused on you, "How does the future look like then?"

Yousquirm slightly, uncomfortable under his gaze your heart skips a beat and your mouth goes dry, f*ck. "The future?"

"You know what I mean." He gives you a pointed stare, and his hand reaches out and curls around your wrist.

"Uh,well, of course, I hope that we manage to defeat the big boss and not waltz off the burden to future generations.”You murmur, feelingsuddenlyflustered by his touch.What the hell?

Yoriichi's hand pauses on your wrist, and a small smile spreads on his face. "I hope that too."

”And I hope we can all live a fulfilling life, you know, all of us together.”You tell him, keeping eye contact.Yet, somehow it feels like a lie to you.

It is truly what you wish for, yet you didn't forget about the fact that someday in the near future, the Demon Slayer Mark will spread around like wildfire,and honestly, you don't have any idea how to stop it.His eyes soften, and you want to turn away from them.

"I guess, I'll be trying my best to achieve that."He replies calmly, his hand releases your wrist and instead places it on top of yours.

Your hands tingle with goosebumps. It feels nice, his presence so close, but it also makes your chest hurt. Your heart pounds rapidly and you feel your cheeks flush.Why? Why do you feel like this?On any other day, the closeness you shared was not this heavy, it was normal for you to be clingy, to either hug him or hold his hand. Heck, not even him kissing your head makes you feel like you do right now.

As if he could read your thoughts, he smiles, even more, his fingers brushingagainst your skin, making you shudder.

“Then what about us?” He suddenly asks, diverting your attention to him instead of figuring out why this feels too intimate all of sudden.

“As in Michikatsu, you and me?” You tilt your head to the side, “Well, I sure hope he will go back to his family-”

"That is not what I meant.” Yoriichi utters and you frown, "What I mean is,you and me. Not my brother.”

"Ah..?”The words were said so quickly, but you felt every single one of them and it made you breathlessand baffled.

Well, you are not sure how toanswer that.Younever thought that far into the future, it is well, not easy for you when there's still too much you are worried about.The possibility that Michikatsu will accept Muzan’s offer was still too high, it is not something you can control. It is not the same as saving Uta from her fate, the decision belongs only to him.

Muzan on the other hand, there is a tiny possibility for you to interfere, you just have to be paired up with Yoriichi for every damn mission. You are not confident enoughto actually do any damage, because nope, nein, not possible. That's for Yoriichi, you were only a distraction.And well, if Muzan still survives, then it will end with Yoriichi and you hunting him and other demons until you die.

“Well, thenwe will stay together, right? Like always.” That's the only thing you can say."It's not likeI am not going anywhere."

"Yes, we will, for as long as we can." He chuckles lightly,as he leans forwards, his lipsdangerously close to yours.

Youfeel your heart beat wildly again and your body goes limp. You don't dare moveand hedoesn't either, his lips remain close to your own, almost touching them. You can feel his warm breath on your skin, the way his nose brushes against your own.

Truthfully, you expected it. How could you not,to others you always looked like almost lovers, and honestly,it was only a question of when. The urge is too strong, your body feels tingly and weak, unable to resist him anymore.His hands grasp the nape of your neck gently and slowly, as if in fear. His eyes lock onto yours, and it's as though he is afraid that you would break the moment if you moved even an inch away from him, yet he is silently asking for permission, he still gives you a way out.

A tiny voice inside tells you that if you were to refuse him now, it will mean youmay have never a chance todo so in the future. Your mind is confused, you cannot tell if it is good or bad to have such a thought in your head.

As your thoughts go on and on, your hands slowly move to his haori, gripping the fabric tightly, wanting to pull him closer. You only need to nod your head, just a signal to show him that you want this.

And that's what you do, you nod your head.

“Good, then that means I get to take care of you for as long as possible.” He murmurs. You can barely register what exactly he is saying, you're too impatient, just wanting to feel his lips finally against you.

You feel him shift and-

Knock, knock!

Instantly you freeze up, the moment was broken by whoever was standing outside. Even Yoriichi stiffens for a moment. "Yoriichi, can I talk to you?”

Tsugikuni -evil, and loving it- Michikatsu.

WHY, GOD, WHY?!Yoriichi looks back at you, and you sigh, hoping to hide howdisappointed you were.

The door opens and Michikatsu steps in, not even giving you any time to move away from each other. Yes, right, privacy was a Luxus in this household.Whatever, it's not like it's suspicious, it's normal to see you both always a bit too close. But damn, did you seriously just got co*ckblocked by Michikatsu?

"Hm, yes, Iwould haveheardyou veryclearly fromoutsidethe room." He replies dryly, and you bite your tongue, making sure not to snort.You did not expect that.

"Right, anyway-"

Before he can continue, you stand up, taking your long-forgotten food with you. “Well, don't mind me. I will go to finally eat something.”

"Alright.”Michikatsu nods at you, and you only gave him a side glance. You can feel Yoriichi's eyes on you the whole time, before finally turning to his brother as you close the door behind you.

Well, that just happened huh?

“Teach me! Please, Michikatsu-sama!” You jump up and down, being too excited about the fact that he has finally come up with his own Breathing, “I will kiss the ground you walk on, I am nothing but your humble student!”

He sighs as you run around in circles before jumping onto him. You promised him to be the most annoying little sh*t in the world until he accepts. He looks at you over his shoulder, eyes squinting slightly when they look at you.

“I am surprised you could even jump that high.” He is being an asshole again, already super done with you. “Let alone have the strength to cling to me.”

You are not going to give up so easily though, no f*cking way you will let him get away with it. You take hold of one of his ears and start tugging at it, “Aren't you just adorable again? You only have to say yes."

His eyes narrow more as you release his ear, “I told you I would consider it.”

Your shoulders sag in disappointment, although you do manage a pout, "I know but still, I really want to learn your Breathing Technique."

Michikatsu’s lips twitch upwards as if he wants to smile, but he doesn't, instead, he just continues looking at you for a moment before he shoves his hand into your face. Trying to throw you off without success. He should know better by now, you will never back down. So he can try all he likes. His hand squeezes your cheeks and you glare right back at him, showing him exactly how annoyed you are, "Oh, come on! Now you're just trying to be rude!”

"No, I'm teaching you a lesson." With that, he pulls his hand away and you frown, shaking your head. Your anger fades away quickly though when you see a glint in his eyes. A spark of excitement that tells you he actually will teach you! You already grin in victory, knowing damn well there's no way he'll win this fight. You are much too stubborn for that.

"WHAT THE f*ck [NAME]?" Enter Shigeo, not being delighted at all.

You can guess why, scratch that, you know exactly why. He's still sulky about you rejecting his Breathing Technique, what a drama queen. You giggle, throwing the sight of your middle finger at him, He looks furious, but then again he always does. "That's what you get for being mean to me."

"Seriously, you reject my Technique because it is in your words "too destructive", just to turn around and want to learn one which is even more so?"

He does have a point, but you shake your head, "Because then I can annihilate your petty ass with my super cool Technique. Maybe then you finally learn how to fear me!"

Shigeo scoffs loudly, throwing up both hands in frustration. "You wish! As if I will ever be scared of a brat."

“I would call you an imbecile, Shigeo, but that'd be so cruel as you wouldn't be able to even spell it.”

"I am this close away from strangling you."

Michikatsu watches him calmly, but his eyes flick between the two of you, obviously wondering where all this animosity is coming from. Most of the time, you both were joking but now it feels a bit too personal. When you hear footsteps behind you, you stop abruptly, turning to see who has entered the room. The instant you feel Michikatsu move, you realize his brother has come upon us.

Well, Yoriichi, and what a nice surprise, Kyoutarou. Your eyes scan his form, searching for any indication that he brought you some Mochi again. The look he gives you, however, says everything. He doesn't bring any food, and you sigh, disappointed.

"I haven't seen you all in a while. Especially together, how rare!"

"It's been a long time since we've met again, Kyoutarou-san." Michikatsu greets formally, bowing his head. He would have bowed correctly if there wasn't you still clinging onto him. Seriously, what are you? A touch-starved koala?

Kyoutarou smiles at his greeting and then turns to look at you, "Sorry, I didn't bring you any Mochi today."

"It's alright, I will survive, probably." You try to be serious for a moment, but when Kyoutarou laughs it's pretty easy to smile along with him. Well, you guess it's alright, he isn't obligated to bring you any anyway. It's only polite for friends to feed each other after all.

"I heard you have taken up your own Breathing Technique?" Kyoutarou asks Michikatsu.

Michikatsu nods as he releases his grip on you, allowing you to let go of him, which makes you question when he even had his arm around you in the first place. He looks annoyed for a second, before saying, "Yes, I couldn't master brothers, so I came up with mine."

The conversation continues on, with Michikatsu explaining how it works. While he is telling the story, Kyoutarou and Shigeo are listening intently. Meanwhile, you are making your way over to Yoriichi, who smiles down at you.

"I was hoping to find you here," he says, reaching out for your hand. The second his fingers brush against yours, he leans closer and whispers into your ear."How are things going with Brother?"

You shrug lightly, before smiling, "He's being kind of sh*tty right now. But I am sure I can convincehim to teach me."

Yoriichi's lips quirk upwards in amusem*nt, "Good girl." He kisses the top of your head gently then releases your hand, watching you for another moment as he turns towards Michikatsu, and then Shigeo.

Your mind shortcuts for a good second before you slap your hands against your cheeks. 'Good girl'?That- you did not expect that, nor did you imagine having such a strong reaction to these simple words. What the hell?! This is ridiculous! You are acting like a total fool.

As Michikatsu speaks on, talking about the details of his breathing technique, he is also constantly glancing at you. You feel yourself blush a bit, super embarrassed that others witness an apparently new weakness of yours.

"Hey! Don't make her blush! She might explode or something," Shigeo says with a mocking laugh. Bastard.

Yoriichi only chuckles and shakes his head, "Don't worry about it, she's fine."

Michikatsu continues telling the other boys his Breathing Technique, leaving you feeling a bit grateful that at least Kyoutarou and he don't make fun of you. Why is everyone so damn nice to you? You don't deserve their kindness! When Michikatsu finishes speaking, he looks at you for a few moments before saying, "I will teach you."

A huge sense of relief floods over you as your heart skips a beat. Oh god, what if you were to faint or something? No, that's stupid, you can do this. It's time to suck it up and man up, even though deep inside you are still a babe. You nod vigorously and then look to him, "Thank you."

His face softens and he smiles at you, "Don't thank me yet."

Surprised, you look up at him and he holds your gaze for a moment before continuing to speak, "We will start tomorrow morning at dawn."

BITCH, WHAT THE f*ck, HOW ABOUT NO? YOU WANT TO SCREAM. He knows that you are completely useless at sunrise. You are terrible at anything that requires waking up early. You can barely wake up on your own, and the only reason you got out of bed was that Yoriichi at some point wants to start the day.

“I don't understand." Shigeo interjects, "Why does she get her way again? No wonder she's starting to act like a spoiled brat."

You ignore the comment as best as possible, because, wow, rude very much. Not that you are bothered by his comments, either way, it's not like you care about being a spoiled brat anyway. At least not anymore, you have bigger fish to fry than what people think of you.

But Michikatsu smirks at Shigeo's comment, putting a hand on your head. "Well, [Name] is the daughter of an administrator to a daimyō, she did get spoiled as a child."

You glance over at him, surprised that he even brought this up. The moment he speaks, you are filled with embarrassment, and your face is hot. God, you don't want them to know that, you just wanted to be [Name], you have thrown anything else away years ago.

Shigeo seems to notice your irritation, "So, she is basically a spoiled princess."

“Who is a spoiled princess?” Out of nowhere, Kuwajima asks, Eiyuu and Ryougo beside him.

Great, now everyone will know, where's the next hole you can crawl into again? Kyoutarou chuckles softly at Kuwajima's question and shakes his head slightly as he answers him, "Apparently [Name]."

You shove Michikatsu's hand off while shooting daggers at the Flame user. What is this? Expose [Name] day or what? Kuwajima looks almost shocked before turning to face Yoriichi and Michikatsu and then Shigeo. "I knew it! I should have realized it sooner."

Both Yoriichi and Michikatsu smile, while Shigeo grins wide. You roll your eyes at his reaction, but can't help but smile too. You know they don't mean any harm with these comments, and yeah, you're technically spoiled but that is because they can't say no to you. It's their own fault.

Shigeo bends down to you, "No wonder you are as intimidating as a bunny, it all makes sense now."

"Bunny?" Eiyuu repeats curiously as he looks between the two of you, blinking rapidly several times in disbelief, now he has down it. He's only waiting for your reaction, hoping it's gonna hurt Shigeo's pride.

"What are you talking about? Bunny? What the heck does that mean?" You frown, trying to bite his hand as he pokes your cheek. "I am gonna bite your finger off and shove it up your flat ass!"

He lets go as his mouth opens in shock and then laughs at you as he pulls back. "You are even as adorable as one."

"You are dead." You glare at him and hisses, "You are so dead."

"What? You don't like 'Bunny'? How about 'Hime'?"

"That's why you suck Shigeo," Eiyuu flatly states, holding you back from pummeling the bastard to the ground, "No wonder she rejects you every time. Wouldn't be surprised to find your body in the river tomorrow."

The others chuckle as he speaks, but Shigeo glares at him with a huff. Now they all want to mock you, you are seriously considering punching someone tonight. Or maybe not punch, perhaps more like kicking. Either way, you have had enough of everyone's bullsh*t.

"Enough talk!" Kyoutarou says cheerfully as he claps his hands together once more. "It's time for us to go to the meeting with Master."

As promised, Michikatsu begins teaching you his Breath Technique early the next morning. You are exhausted beyond belief from last night and even worse when it comes to dealing with the heat. It feels like your brain has overheated and your heart is burning in your chest.

When he shows you how the breathing technique works, his explanation makes sense but when it comes to actually do it for real, it becomes difficult. And by hard, you mean super difficult. You have never felt this way before and it makes you wonder what kind of crazy idiot decided to teach a girl that involves intense physical exertion during the hottest time of the day.

Michikatsu doesn't seem too concerned. On the contrary, he looks impressed as he watches you struggle.

"Good girl, keep going." He praises, patting your shoulder encouragingly.

Bitch, excuse me? You groan and turn away from him before looking up into the sky. Why does he have to pick up your weaknesses and use them against you? Your face scrunches as you try to control your emotions and thoughts, f*cking idiot.

Sadly, you found out about another weakness of yours pretty quickly. You may have something like a hand kink, because when you struggled with a specific stance, Michikatsu took matters into his own hands and positioned your body correctly. That's when you noticed that he was some really pretty hands. He has smooth skin and his fingers are long enough for gripping objects without crushing them, and god, did you mention the veins?

You feel a small shiver run through your body as Michikatsu reaches out for your shoulders and pushes until you are standing properly in your pose. He knows, doesn't he? f*ck, please no, this is humiliating. Isn't there a possibility of unseeing them? You very much would like an instruction for that, please as simple as Ikea assembly instructions.

There's no way you will survive this, and without thinking you blur out,"Can you please, I don't know, put them away?"

"What?" Michikatsu questions, frowning in confusion. What the hell is wrong with you suddenly? He looks at where you are staring, "My hands?"

"Yes," you reply with a sigh, knowing full well he won't let it go for an annoyingly long time."It's just…they're distracting me."

His brow furrows further before he sighs and lets his hands fall to his sides, "You have no shame at all."

"Not at all," you say sarcastically, rolling your eyes as you turn to look at him and continue with his training, without any distractions, what a win for you. As the sun rises higher into the sky, you realize that if anyone should ask you about your progress today after your first session with Michikatsu, you don't even know what to say. 'Oh, you know, the usual, he unlocked a new kink for me.'

At some point in the morning, your legs are shaking so badly that you fall over, collapsing onto the ground with a grunt. Michikatsu looks up at the sky for a moment and then shakes his head before walking over to kneel down by you. "Are you okay? Are you dizzy?"

"I'm fine," you gasp, looking up at his worried face, "I'll be fine soon, promise."

Michikatsu nods slowly and helps prop you up on your feet, "Then we continue."

The days pass by in a haze of sweat and exhaustion. The training continues on and on, and you are forced to push yourself physically harder than ever before in your life. But Michikatsu never gives up on you; he keeps pushing you even though he has to be exhausted himself. And somehow, he manages to do it without making fun of you. Instead, he treats your pain and suffering with patience while also understanding that at times, you simply cannot do it on your own.

And after weeks of training under Michikatsu's tutelage, your progress has been nothing short of remarkable. While Michikatsu teaches you how to use your sword better, the other boys watch over you with great interest. They see the changes happening within you that nobody else is privy to a more controlled and confident presence, less fear in battle despite the danger you may face, and a stronger sense of confidence as the months drag on.

What can you say? You promised yourself that you learn his Breathing Technique and that's exactly what you did. It might have taken some time to get there—in fact, it was a lot longer than you expected—but eventually you managed to master it. Michikatsu smiles as you bow before him in gratitude.

"Thank you so much Michikatsu," you tell him honestly before smiling shyly up at him and saying, "I don't know what I would do without you."

"Probably learned a different Technique." He states, which causes a giggle to escape from you.

You are still so not used to his teasing. After all this time together and you have not yet figured him out. You hear a few of the others chuckle with amusem*nt as well. Kuwajima looks over at Michikatsu with curiosity in his eyes while Eiyuu and Ryougo both stare openly at you with proud expressions on their faces.

You wish things will not change, you want to be this happy with them for a long time, and sometimes there is a luxurious amount of time before anything bad happens. Unfortunately, you know better than most people that things can change in an instant, yet, it is easy to turn a blind eye to the inevitable.

A year is a long time to get yourself too comfortable.

The Demon Slayer Mark is a mysterious marking that Demon Slayer can awaken under specific conditions, and it is the reason why you see the future that you have hoped of crumbling to ashes.

These are similar to birthmarks that appear on their face or on their body, each person possesses a unique pattern to their Mark which occur to be based on the Breathing Style they use. The Mark can only be awakened under very specific conditions, but if they manage to do this, they grant special abilities while enhancing the bearer’s pre-existing traits.

It is nothing more than a horrific curse disguised as a blessing. The marked ones have a price to pay for that, paying one's lifespan in advance in the exchange for such strength.

It is spreading around like wildfire, for them, it was like a present from the gods, for you it was nothing more than a countdown until they will perish to it. First, it was Michikatsu, then it was Shigeo, then Eiyuu, and so on, until all your loved ones got it.

But why was it suddenly happening? There is one special property of the Mark, that it is able to spread from one bearer to the other as if they were resonating which each other. Yoriichi was the cause; he was born with it and will be the only one to live after the age of twenty-five.

And you- You're no exception to this rule either.

You were so stupid to cling to such a childish mindset, as if you, who has been at Yoriichi‘s side for over a decade would be immune to such a curse. The moment you picked up a sword it was over. You should've known better, truly.A mark in the shape of a crescent moon is burnt into your skin, right above your heart. Sealing your fate, for once and for all. You do not believe anyone will ever see how old age looks on you, you doubt you will even reach twenty-five.

The only thing you were grateful for was that you were alone when it happened. It was a solo mission, a stubborn demon disguised as a human. Who else than you, a Marechi, would be better for the job? Just lure it out with your blood and be done with it. Yet, fate had different plans.

You wailed and screamed, stabbing your sword again and again into the ground where the demon as turned to dust. There was only one thought running through your head; ‘You will die, you will die, you will die and there is nothing that you can do about it!’

Nobody will ever know how much you cried that night.

At least you did not have to be the one to tell them, to watch them grieve for you. You may be selfish, but you would not wish them to look at you any differently. It is enough when that they worry about each other, they shouldn't have to about another one.

The first few days were a flurry of confusion and chaos, the effect of the mark taking over you became apparent, and you avoided the others like a plague. The worry that they will instantly know was eating up your mind. You even wanted to tell them about the mark, but you are afraid that they would see it differently now, as it is a symbol of your impending death.

God, Yoriichi, he will know for sure, with his ability he will the second he lays his eyes on your form. His ability, being able to see right through you, will able to predict that you will succumb to your mark. In a sense, you keep your promise.

You will stay by his side until you die.

After a turbulent meeting with Ubuyashiki-sama, bless his pure soul, you are sitting on the veranda. You are deeply buried in your thoughts, playing absently with your Hanafuda earring as you watch the gloomy weather before you.

He just informed you about the last meeting they all had together, apparently the first one died because of the Mark. You feel bad that you let out a sigh of relief that it was not anyone from your friends but a twenty-four-year-old Slayer whose name and face was unknown to you.

Yoriichi was gone after you came back from the mission, you were informed that he has his own solo mission and would be back in a few days.Yet, you have a feeling that Ubuyashiki-sama knows, why else would after you stood up to leave tell you he will not inform the others?

The thing is, you did not expect to be found out so quickly, so ruthlessly. Before you knew it, Michikatsu bumped into you, and he knew at the moment you laid your eyes on him. How he looked at you told you that he had already figured it out.

You blurt out the first thing that came to your mind, which is 'Nice weather huh?.' He looks at you in disbelief, his eyebrows furrowed in confusion. It was raining, you feel so foolish to say something as stupid as that.

The silence is devastating until he finally asks “Are you serious?”

You nod, unable to say anything else. The next words from Michikatsu's lips are 'Oh my God,' followed by a deep sigh.

You turn away from him, feeling embarrassed and guilty. 'Well… I mean, we are all gonna die sooner or later. So yeah, it shouldn't really matter.' You hear your own voice echoing inside your head and you feel so pathetic. It sounded so cold even though it was true, but still… Your heart aches to the point of tears, for him, for your friends, and for yourself. But you force yourself to not let them fall.

Your hand reaches your chest, touching the place where the mark was burnt onto your skin and you wonder what it feels like for him. Would it feel like an invisible chain around his neck or would he now be able to ignore its existence?

How does he deal with it? You want to ask him, but you don't even dare to look in his direction anymore. How could he even stand you? You're such a coward; hiding your pain and pretending everything is fine, even when it isn't.

Michikatsu is still standing there beside you, looking down at you, waiting for you to talk to him. You take a deep breath and look up at him, your eyes meet his gaze. There was hurt etched across his expression, his eyes telling you that he understands exactly how much it hurts to see everyone you care about suffering.

“Master told you about the meeting?“ He sighs and sits down next to you. It was silent between you two for a moment as you contemplate your answer before you finally speak.

“Yes, he did.”You sigh. His hand rests on the top of your head and you flinch lightly as if you were scolded. “Do you know about-?”

You can't read his expression but he nods his head slowly. You swallow hard against the lump that is forming in your throat. He looks like he's trying to stop himself from saying something and he shakes his head slightly. You stare up at him, searching his eyes for some sort of reaction to how he's dealing with this whole situation.

“f*ck, seriously, this f*cking sucks.” You mutter, unable to hold it in any longer. Your body relaxes once you release the words, but your sadness remains. “At least, I still have a few years left.”

“Does Yoriichi-”

“No, he doesn't.” You interrupt him, shaking your head. “He's been on a mission since before I came back. Nobody knows, well, except you now and I want to keep it that way.”

Michikatsu stares at you, almost as if he wants to say more but he stops himself. He takes in a deep breath and then lets it out. His hand moves off your head and he lays it on his lap.

“I'm sorry. I didn't mean to make you uncomfortable.” You look at him apologetically. “It's just that nobody else knows yet and it's… well, I guess I'm still afraid. Not knowing how they'll react makes me anxious and it's not like I'm the only one with it, they are all probably scared, and yet I don't want to give them another reason to worry about.”

What are you even doing? You know that he is also scared of death and you are here dumping all your anxious thoughts onto him, are you really that selfish? But you cannot help it, you need someone to share this burden with. And right now, Michikatsu is the only person who understands you, who understands what you are feeling.

"You're not alone." He says, his voice husky and low. You look at him in surprise, you've never heard him sound like that before. His voice sounds like a whisper and it sends shivers down your spine. “Besides, you don't have to act like everything is okay, it's not like I don't know exactly what you're going through.”

You smile at him, the first one you truly mean since that night. He smiles back at you and you both continue to sit there in silence for a while. You stare out at the gloomy weather and listen to the rain pattering on the roof as time passes by.

Eventually, the sun peeks out from behind the clouds and the sky clears up. That is when he asks you, “What is your plan now?”

'My plan?' You think to yourself. You glance at him before answering. "I guess, hunting demons down until I die. The only thing that changed is how long it will take until it happens.”

"That's not much of a plan," he states matter-of-factly.

"Yeah I know, but it's the only thing that I can do.” You shrug as you let the sunlight warm up your skin, “Besides, I knew the danger when I joined the corps, even without the Mark, the risk of dying any day was always there. It is just that now I know that I do not have that much time left and I am content with that.”

His gaze is penetrating, it pierces through you and you can feel your pulse quicken under his scrutiny. Yet, you can see that he's surprised by your statement. Your eyes are gleaming with the sun illuminating the sky again,it is as if you already made peace with this horrendous fate. His throat is dry, how could you just acceptit?

"So you really are content with dying?" He finally speaks up after you pause to look back at him, you smile and shake your head slowly.

"Of course not!” You exclaim,“I mean, I don't think anyone would be. I just accepted that there is nothing I can do about it, andthat's enough. I don't want to waste my life worrying about it every single day. I can't change it anyway, so why bother?The only thing that saddens me is that I can't spend much time with the others anymore.”

You sigh, letting your mind wander back to all the times you spent with them. All the memories you shared together. Well, at least you have these moments, smiling at the thought.

"What about our succession? There's absolutely no hope that anyone will even master it, they will disappear from this world.”Michikatsu's voice is tinged withdistressas he says the last sentence.

Shouldn't he have that conversation with Yoriichi?

"Well, I'm notthatworried about that. If it comes down to that, I willwrite itdown like Kyoutarou and who knows maybein ten or a hundred years someone will master it.”You reply with a smile.“I am proud of our era, we accomplished so much but I am sure someday there will be one that even surpasses ours.”

"That's what I thought you'd say." He takes in a deep breath and lets it out slowly, his eyes scanning the horizon. "I guess, there isreallynothing we can do about it, there is no time left.”

You look at him, concerned. You feel that he's trying to convince himself of somethingyet, your mind wanders. Is he now also sickened by your optimism? He never shared any of his truest thoughts with you, and you can't blame him for that.

In a way, you hoped that being by his side would changehis mindset that it is alright not to be someone like Yoriichi but his last sentence shattered even this small hope. Of course, it was not enough. You can't change something that is burned into his mind sincehischildhood, no matter how much you want it, you can only watch.

God, maybe this is too much. Maybe he didn't even consider it or even thought about it all but, even if he will be furious at you for even thinking that way about him,you don't care, youhave to get it out. You grip his arm tightly, as you blur out.

“I know that we have no real future, that we don't have time but please, don't consider turning into a demon!”

Michikatsu is silent, his face blanks as he stares at you. Your heart pounds so hard inside your chest that you can hear it, the blood rushing through your veins. You hold on to his arm, clinging to it for dear life. You're afraid that if you let go,he will really accept the offer that Muzan will presenthim.

He looks at you, his eyes searching yours for a reaction. You're breathing heavily, your cheeks are flushed red and your hands are trembling. Your body is trembling with fear and youcan't stop.

"Please, just don't do it!" You whisper, feeling your voice shake.“It is really not worth it!”

You stare at him, waiting for a response. He's quiet, his expression unreadable. You wait until the silence becomes unbearable before you finally,break it."I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said that. I guess I just-”

“Why?”He interrupts you, his voice is low and his eyes are full ofdespair. His hand grips yours, squeezing it hard enough to hurt. You gasp in pain but you do not pull away.

"I'm sorry,I don't want you to end up like that.“ You repeat, looking down at your lap. "I never told you about Ichijūright?”

Of course not, you have nevertalkedaboutIchijū, they only knew him as your first demon encounter or the reason for your scars. It is the first time you have even muttered his name since that night.You take a deep breath before continuing.

“Ichijū is the name I gave the demon that I encountered before I joined the corps, you remember the story right?”

"Yeah, I do," Michikatsu answers, his eyes glued to yours. "Why are you telling me this now?"

“He was just a child, maybe thirteen but he was already a demon for a few decades, that's what he told me. Yet, he didn't even remember his name or anything about himself. He had been living like a wild animal for years. I saw how his mind worked, he was like a child but yet he was a demon.“

Some people choose to turn into a demon, but I believe most of them did not even have a choice. They forget who they are and live with their instincts. Nevertheless, that is in my opinion pitiful. I don't want to start pitying you someday.”

Michikatsu does not say anything as you finish speaking, his mouth hanging slightly open, so you just finish your small monologue, “Well, in the end, I can't force you or decide for you but, trust me. If you turn into one, I will come back from the dead and seriously kill you.”

You never had the chance to see Yoriichi once again, it was as if fate wanted you two to be apart. When he came back from a mission, you were on one, it was disheartening.Truly, you didn't even catch a glimpse of his red hair, nothing.

So it was again another solo mission, Ubuyashiki ordered everyone who has the mark to not do joint missions anymore. The fear that it will spread, even more, killing even more slayers was too great. That means you are alone, but more importantly, no chance for you to encounter Muzan.

f*ck, your luck seriously runs out now, huh? You're starting to wonder if this is just another curse or just a bad joke from God. No matter how hard you try, no matter how many times you tried, Ubuyashiki always ends up sending you out alone. This time is no different.

Your body aches with exhaustion, it is a f*cked up feeling to experience how your body slowly but surely withers away. Your muscles grow weak, your body trembles, and your joints are stiffening up. But even so, you refuse to give up. As long as you can still move, you will do your job. If you can't change the fact that Muzan will survive, then at least you haunt other demons, and in doing so save the lives of others. So you continue your search through the darkness, following the faint glow of the moon.

Your footsteps echo on the damp ground as you walk across the muddy earth. The sky is gloomy and the air is heavy with humidity; it makes everything feel dark and depressing. You keep on walking, your steps soundless on the soft mud until something suddenly grabs your ankle and pulls you down.

You scream as you fall on the ground, your back hits the damp earth painfully hard as you roll over onto your back and look up at the looming figure above you. f*cking hell, are your senses already that clouded? How could you even miss this?The shadow looms over your prone body as it crouches on top of you, its presence so close that your skin crawls and chills run down your spine.

"Goddamnit.” You stutter in a strangled voice when you realize how stupidly easy this was for them to catch you off guard. Even so, your mind refuses to accept it and you try to scramble your limbs.

You kick at the demon who looms above you, you're just too pissed at yourself that you didn't notice it immediately. You should let him bite you, every demon froze up when they smelled your blood, it is even more effective when they taste it. The longer you fight, the higher the chance of your blood being spilled, so why not do it now?

But instead, you only manage to kick it off your body. The creature lands heavily on the ground and you quickly crawl away from him, standing up in the process. It's hard to stand upright but you manage somehow. Your eyes scan the surroundings as you take a deep breath, searching for signs of other demons nearby. There is nothing to be seen around here; there are no traces of any kind of other demons nearby, and even the night itself is as silent as the grave.

"Where the hell did you even come from?" You growl as you step forward towards it, your fingers itching with anticipation. Even so, you are careful not to make too sudden movements. If this demon wants to play with you, then so will you. "I'm really f*cking tired of these sh*tty solo missions."

"Wouldn't you like to know?" The demon chuckles as he gets to his feet again, how its eyes gleaming with malice makes you shiver. This thing isn't normal; there is something else about it… But what?

You don't have time to dwell on it for long, the demon rushes towards you, swinging its arm as hard as it can. You dodge to one side and roll into a crouch, then leap into the air, trying to get a good slice at it. As you land, you look over to see his arm fall down and it regenerated in a split second, you're almost impressed at how fast it was.

Then you realize it, he could possess some sort of Blood Demon Art, which would seriously suck. That means you won't be able to easily defeat as you have hoped for. Ugh, whatever, it's not the first time.

 Your eyes dart back and forth as you search for an opening, you have to be quick, or else the bastard might be able to cut one of your limbs, making things so much more difficult for you. The moment you think that you find the perfect spot to strike at him, the demon moves faster than you expect. It grabs your hand before you can attack, and pulls your arm close to it.

f*ckf*ckf*ckf*ckf*ck-

Then, without giving you a chance to react, it slashes down on your left arm with its claws, cutting through the thick fabric of your clothes. Your cry echoes in the dark as blood spurts out from your wound, your vision blurs and everything around you seems suddenly so far away.

"f*ck!" You groan when you notice it's trying to pierce your arm with its claws. You quickly kick it away, but your arm is already bleeding profusely; it's almost impossible to do any proper damage to this thing now, yet at least he's gonna get a very good sniff from your blood. It growls in displeasure when you try to move again, but you can see how its body stiffens, it is clearly surprised by the sudden intoxicating smell.

It can still move faster than you can expect. You curse as you barely manage to roll out of the way, only managing to avoid getting slashed in half because of your reflexes. Still, even though it is fast, its movements are getting sloppy, his eyes are unfocused, clearly not in the right mind anymore and that is your one and only chance.

Even with only one functioning arm, you quickly took your stance, using the only form you could possibly perform now, "Moon Breathing: First Form: Dark Moon, Evening Palace!"

You quickly draw your sword and slash swiftly in a singular horizontal motion in a crescent shape, aiming for its neck. As it makes contact with it, the demon grabs your left arm, the one barely hanging on your flesh, and it pulls hard. You can only imagine how gruesome it must look, getting your forearm torn away from you, still you manage barely to cut off its head.

The head hits the ground and rolls away, its body still moving forward. The severed body continues to limp on for another step, then falls to its knees and collapses in front of you. Your eyes dart to the severed arm which lies in the hand of the fallen demon, you want to vomit.

That- God, f*ck, why is it always your left side? This isn't what you should have focused on but f*ck, you don't want to come to terms with the fact that it is your arm lying in the dirt.

You grit your teeth together painfully, holding back nausea from all the pain surging through every inch of your body; there was nothing else you wanted more than just collapsing onto your butt here and letting the darkness take over everything… But no! Not yet, you can do this. So instead you focus on doing something about your injury before going unconscious.

"f*ck." You curse under your breath, ignoring the throbbing ache in your arm, as you tear up some cloth from your pants, "Damn f*cking bastard…"

This sucks so much, sh*t like this shouldn't happen at all. Your career as a Demon Slayer is definitely over.

Your legs are shaking when you finally collapse against a tree, you've been walking for probably some hours or just a few minutes, it doesn't matter. What matters right now is that you're exhausted beyond belief and your entire body hurts. Even though your mind refuses to accept it, you know exactly how f*cked you are because of the wound on your arm.

If only you had let him bite you, maybe you wouldn't end up this injured. Now, even if you get treatment soon enough, they will not be able to save your life. It's too late anyway; you need to find somewhere safe where you can rest until you die. You slump down against the tree trunk, looking around for signs of other demons nearby.

But there is no sign anywhere near you. All you can see ahead is an endless expanse of the dark forest. You try to move again but feel that you won't be able to do anything more. There is no way out except death, if only there was someone who could help you—

The sudden thought makes your eyes snap open again, but what did you think? Who would come to rescue you? The answer comes quickly to you: nobody. No one in their right mind will ever dare to enter these woods after hearing about the danger. That was the reason why you are even here in the first place.

So you sit silently and wait for the inevitable end.

It takes less than a few minutes before a figure suddenly appears from behind the trees, and you tense up immediately upon seeing it. A f*cking demon, great. It must have smelled your blood, you can't even die in peace huh? But instead of rushing towards you, it simply walks slowly towards you while staring at you with crimson-red eyes.

Its presence has completely ruined the serenity of the night; now everything seems so much darker. Your heart begins pounding heavily inside your chest when you realize something else, the thing that just appeared doesn't seem like any sort of demon you've seen before. You don't really know whether or not to believe your own senses, but you still find yourself unable to deny the fact that he looks too familiar.

His skin tone was so pale, and his features are quite handsome, if somewhat pale compared to most humans' complexion. Even so, there is no doubt that it isn't human. You try to take a good look at the man and push to remember where you saw such a face before. This can't be possible, because surely you wouldn't forget such a handsome face unless you were drunk. He is a tall and muscular man, with curly black hair, sharp, almond-shaped eyes colored in red—

"Ah." The sound escapes your lips as recognition hits home. Why are you so f*cking dumb?

You lift your arm, trying to face-palm yourself, well, if only your hand wasn't missing, and then you chuckle, of course, only you would have the luck of encountering him when you were already on death's door and yet, somehow you're not surprised by his appearance?

Kibutsuji- f*cking, goddamnit, why is it always you- Muzan.

"Oh my, who would have thought that I find something so rare here?" He smiles as he approaches you, chuckling as he lifts your arm closer to its face, inhaling deeply through its nose. Its red eyes gleam like hot coals in the night; they burn into yours making you feel uncomfortable. "It's been a while since I met such aMarechi."

You stare up at him blankly for some moments. Great, you should have taken it with you, but then again, why even care anymore? More importantly what was the progenitor of all other demons in existence doing here in the first place?

"Well, it is nice to meet the Demon Lord personally." Your eyes fall to your arm that he so rudely tossed aside. It really isn't funny, you aren't in any position to be joking about anything right now, especially not with Kibutsuji. But still… The bastard just happened to appear out of nowhere? That's impossible.

"So you are aware of who I am?" He raises an eyebrow at you, amused. You can see how his pupils dilate slightly as he looks down upon you from above, taking note of every inch of your body.

"How could I not?" you mutter under your breath, keeping your eyes firmly glued to the ground. "It is like an instinct to instantly know."

"I see." He doesn't say another word after that, instead, he simply walks toward you and kneels beside you. His hand reaches out a sudden feeling of disgust rises inside your stomach as he touches you, but you know there is no use trying to stop him.

His hand strokes along your neck before reaching up to your earrings. You flinch slightly at the roughness of his touch, but you manage to remain still. If you start screaming at this point, he'll be sure to kill you and you prefer to die on your own terms, yet you can't help to ask, “Did you meet him?”

His fingers trace your earrings, the same ones as Yoriichi, and your breath is stuck in your throat. And then one by one, every last hair on your body stands straight out. You're petrified, paralyzed by fear. Even with your clouded mind, you can sense destructive pressure, a great power that could swallow up your life without blinking an eye. And yet simultaneously, you sensed something else, too—the most dreadful thing of all: amusem*nt.

The moment he looked down at you with those eyes filled with a coldness that could turn flesh to stone, the air seemed to grow thin around you, leaving you unable to breathe properly. Your chest feels like it's caving in, you don't need any confirmation now.

"I see," Muzan said calmly, "you're also one of them."

With that single sentence, the air grew even thinner. His voice was so clear, but the words were anything you feared of.Yoriichi met him and didn't manage to kill him.Still, there's one question that burns in you, the only tiny hope you can cling to. "Is his brother-”

“Oh?” Muzan's smile is so sharp that it pierces through you like a knife. The corners of his mouth curl upward in a cruel, mocking sneer, and his tone of voice also turns to mockery. “He couldn't decline my generous offer, now could he?”

You feel like you're suffocating from the heat inside your skull, and your head grows hot enough to melt iron. It's not just your head; your entire body begins to sweat like crazy. But more than anything, you're terrified at the thought that Michikatsu turned into everything you had hoped he will not.

Was it all for nothing? No matter how hard you look, you simply can't find a single shred of hope anywhere. All you want right now is to finally die because dying seems better than enduring whatever lies ahead.But before you could take your last breath, apair of hands reaches out to touch your face. Those same hands are cold as ice, they make your skin crawl.

"How about you also become a demon?" He whispers, his voice is so cruel that it sends chills up your spine. You shiver violently and try desperately to tear yourself away, but his grip is too firm.

“No, I will die, and I will haunt you until you burn in hell.” Your eyes focus one last time, instantly being hit by the gaze of those scarlet eyes, the last thing you will ever see and you smile, “I promise you Muzan, you will pay for your sins.”

You hear nothing but the sound of your own labored breathing, nothing but your heartbeat pounding furiously against your ears. Your eyes begin to close slowly, your consciousness slipping away from you as you go to meet your demise. Just as your eyes shut and darkness surrounds you, you faintly hear the faintest of laughter.

It was a foolish thing to say, but you were already going to die either way.

"You shouldn't thinktoo highly of yourself!"His voice cuts through the dark like a knife, and suddenly, your head slams against the ground with such force that it feels like you were struck by lightning.

You feel pain throughout your entire body, and it's excruciating. The only thought running through your head was how in the end, you couldn't keep your promise.

You couldn't stay by Yoriichi's side until the end, huh?

They found your sword a few days later, almost hidden behind the wildlife of the forest, but it was a clear message:Ōzora[Name] was the first of the pillars whodied.

And the others were quick to follow you, one after another either died by the Mark or were hunted down by eitherMuzan personally or their former comradeMichikatsu.

The only one who survived was Yoriichi, but also he met his end sixty years after this tragedy under a blood moon.

What is themoral of the story? No matter how much we try; no matter how much we want it... Some stories just simply don't have a happy ending. This chapter might end up having a happier ending if Yoriichi had managed to annihilatethe Demon Lord,if you had tried a little more.If you weren't so innocently naive.

It could have been written in the past tense, but now that he's gone, it will be written as a tragedy in your book.

And that is life itself; the bittersweet nature of our existence.

Yet, this isn't the end, not for you, this is just another finished chapter.

You found yourself wandering around the streets of Edo with the sole purpose of looking for someone.

It was still raining cats and dogs and the wind blew fiercely off the mountains, making you wish you hadn't come outside with such weather. If you would've known it was going to rain like this, you would have waited it out.

Now there's no doubt that the day has been a complete waste, and the only thing you got out of it was a soaking-wet outfit and a headache. And the worst part? No matter where you looked, you just couldn't find him at all.

A loud rumble of thunder shakes the street as a flash of lightning lights up the night sky and then, out of nowhere, you see a figure suddenly appear from between two houses and you sigh in relief.

There he is!

As soon as you spotted him, you began running toward him, and as he turned around and saw your form, he frowned. You're drenched from head to toe, and your hair is wet too. "What are you doing here?"

He looks so worried, so concerned about you. You don't know he would care so much, but somehow it makes you feel warm inside.

"Because I was worried about you, I didn't even see you for a moment today!" You whine as you grab onto his arm and start tugging him along, you're practically pulling him through the city. "You probably didn't even eat today huh?"

“Let's go home, Hakuji.”

Chapter 6: ACT II • Yūgen I

Chapter Text

• yūgen •

(n.) an awareness of the universe that triggers emotional responses too deep and mysterious for words

The sun starts to sink in a glorious blaze of color across the sky. From somewhere nearby you can hear the quiet and gentle splashing of a river, a far more pleasant tone than the panic shouts from around you.

There is a half-empty ache in your soul. You feel cold yet almost serene as your eyes open after what felt like a deep slumber and your body aches for warmth and silence, but the wet clothes cling to your body would make it impossible for you.

And yet, there’s only one thing you can think about as you focus on the various reddish tones painted across the sky.

Scarlet; the color of the ichor that dripped from your arm that was solely a tangled mess of flesh and bone, glistening on your lips in the deepest shade. The same blood-red hues that came with pain, agony, and mockery, those despicable crimson eyes, the last thing you remember before you—

Everything comes rushing back, the memories, the feelings, the sounds, and the smells, all of them a blur as you sit up, gasping desperately for air. Everything in you screams as your body tries to regain your ability, the Constant Breathing you’ve mastered over the years. These mind-shattering noises of voices around you, blurry faces invading your field of vision, follow every breath you take.

“Ōzora-san!” they shout again and again. “Are you alright?!”

Oh, when was the last time someone called you by that name? You try to shake off their concern and turn away, curling into yourself once more and trying to stop this terrible spinning sensation inside you. But even so, someone pulls at your left arm– the one which should be gone– shaking you awake.

You manage to focus enough through the haze in your head to see a bunch of children around you. Unfamiliar faces full of panic and terror, as if they just saw a dead person come back to life. You cast your eyes down and see your bloodless small hands, too small and dainty.

As you touch them, feeling every single finger on each hand carefully, you realize why. Your skin is soft; delicate. No longer rough from calluses or scared fingers. The skin that could only belong to a young child.

No, you shake your head, no, no, no, this can’t be happening again! This can’t be right. It can’t, it can’t– but when your gaze falls upon the river, right next to you and the sensation of the damp reddish kimono on your frozen skin.

Your fingers shoot up to touch the familiar feeling of your earrings, but there’s nothing for you to feel, only the soaked hair that sticks to your face. Yoriichi– you couldn’t keep your promise, you couldn’t change their fates. For what has it thrown you into this, if not for that?

There’s a rage inside you, violent and burning—but god; you are so tired of seeing red but it’s the only color you see now. These pathetic cries, these shouts calling for help, your hands are shaking as you pull your arm away from the death grip that child- the boy had. You don’t want to be touched, and your knuckles bruise as they make contact with his face.

What a failure you are; what a pathetic being. Letting your wrath out on someone innocent as your blood boils fiercely. Your fists are like rusted blades. The heart inside you is silver, wet, and breaking.

You have returned born once again, taking over the body of a child who should have died in that river, but a part of you is still there, laying against the tree, green leaves plastered to your cold skin, black soil staining your body. An ache deep in the pit of you for anything besides this great, terrible silence, born of feeling unalive.

You try to force yourself up, your arms heavy, and even though everyone around you has stopped their frantic calls, you can feel those same eyes upon you, peering at every inch of your frozen flesh and every breath as it exits your mouth. Their whispers can be heard clearly through the haze that surrounds you; as if their voices are speaking right inside your head–

How did she survive that? What happened to her? Why is she acting so strange? Is this really Ōzora-san? Was she always this cruel?

They’ve got it all wrong. It’s only the body that survived hosting now, a soul made of nothing more than the pain, the memories, and the past. A mess of flesh and bones that shouldn’t ever be moving or breathing again. But they think they know you and what you’re capable of because you look just like them, with your soft hair and youthful voice—never would Ōzora [Name] display such an act of violence and cruelty. But you do; you are scared, confused, and heartbroken.

You glance down at the boy’s face decorated with a split lip, bruises forming on his face, and at your split knuckles. A shaky sigh leaves you, still feeling his skin under your fingers. A sense of familiarity repressed the madness.

Wet footsteps are the only sound echoing through the area, as you never once look back at the mess you’ve made.

It took barely two days for word to spread throughout town about what had occurred in that place by the river, which you learned was on Edo's outskirts and yet, these whispers quickly quiet down. No way could a delicate girl like yourself have beaten up that child.

Only a week later your mother, Ōzora Miyuuki, found you in the street, clad in stolen hakama pants, kimono, and haori, a desperate attempt to feel like yourself while nibbling on some Mochi that you bought from some money you may have stolen. To see her again, the same as you vividly remember, but with tears streaming down her eyes, broke your heart anew.

In the course of the next few months, you could find out a lot. This time there weren’t any memories you have access to before you regained conciseness in this body, so it depended on you to get the basic knowledge.

Currently, it is the Edo Period, exactly the 3rd year of the Enkyō Era, so you were already dead for over two almost three centuries. Your father died last year in the great fire that swept through Edo, Tsukihiko despite his relatively young age works at the magistrate and was rarely home, which you call bullsh*t.

The hope you had that the gods may have mercy on your soul and had you directly reincarnated after your death, even though you are already nine years old, turned to dust. Your mind and stomach couldn’t handle this information, the desire to see him again is overwhelming, stunning your already restless mind. Still, he’s dead, long since a rotting corpse, only bones buried somewhere without a proper grave—f*ck, you don’t even know where.

Our brains so hate the idea of losing something valuable to us that we abandon all rational thought, and we make some really poor decisions. For the first few days, there was no desire to eat or sleep. When you tried to swallow anything, nausea overwhelms you, and when you tried to close your eyes, regret and what-ifs are haunting you, leaving you sweating and crying.

‘Almost’ is the worst way to love someone, but maybe it is a good thing that this love never got explored because if you did, that would be the end for you, and yet, unexpressed emotions will never die. They are buried alive and will come forth later in uglier ways.

You spend those hours trying to make sense of everything that happened; feeling guilty for not being strong enough and angry that all of it had been so senseless. It hurts; more than you thought possible, with every breath you take, a sharp ache in the center of you.

When the pain finally dulls, the throbbing inside you slowly lessens, as well as your other pains. You have become used to the stress and pressure in the surrounding air. Most of the time, you either help your mother in the household or started your routine of training. It is the only thing that not even death could take from you.

This life isn’t one of calm — it has never truly felt like home — but you’ve learned to adjust your feelings and desires to keep going forward until you could see through another day. It was good for a while, being empty. You didn’t hurt anymore. But as time went on, it was like you could hear yourself from far away, begging for permission to come back.

To be honest; wrath was also now a big part of why you keep continuing. For f*ck’s sake, you almost got kissed by one of the most handsome men in this world, by the goat himself, the one who the gods himself favored and he wanted you! The thought of something more intimate would end up with you destroying yet another door.

f*ck, curse that worthless co*ckblocking bitch. He has to take responsibility for that sh*t, you will not accept a dumb apology, and he has to slit his belly like the “honorable samurai” that he is. You will punch into his stupidly handsome face, and call him every goddamn insult that you know of.

The thought alone that you know for sure that he’s wandering around as Kokushibou, still very much alive, makes you flare up in the desire for revenge.

But for now, here you are; one year after the fateful night, walking through the streets of the current largest city in Japan. Edo was always busy, with many people coming from the countryside seeking their fortunes in this place of riches and fame.

This area is filled with noise, screams, laughter, and most importantly money and that was tight in the Ōzora household, despite your brother’s work, your father’s income is missing, and because of that, it was harder to make ends meet. So what does a girl have to do when everyone in your family, except you, works themselves to the bone so that you can eat every day without care?

Right, you use your skills from your previous life, your more than good looks and innocent facade for the greater good; pickpocketing.
It isn’t the first time you have done this, hell; you stole in your previous life from your own family so that Yoriichi and you had a comfortable start. It is far easier to steal from strangers.

This is where your looks come in handy. Whenever you pump into one of your targets, you apologize quickly with big tear-filled eyes, such a fatal weapon! Of course, this wouldn’t save your ass in the long run, so you maintain the image of a polite and friendly young girl who helps whenever someone is in need, desiring nothing in return. In the eyes of these fools, you are a saint.

That, of course, comes with a price. There were too many times that men would stare at you with an infatuated gaze and touch your hair or arm with roving hands as you walked past. The glances didn’t bother you that much, but being touched made you want to scream out in disgust as if those fingers could burn their way right through the soft skin of your flesh.

You have been walking for a while now, glancing at the sun; it’s already halfway to the horizon. The little number of coins are shoved into a pouch which you then conceal under a fold of your kimono. The faint clinking sound makes your stomach flutter with anticipation.

There was maybe another reason you choose this kind of way to earn a bit extra.

None other than Upper Moon Three–Akaza, and you’re a hundred percent sure that you’re in the Era where he was still human. There were just too many coincidences! Whispers about a Demon Child, almost two hundred years until the Taisho Era, your mother told you about a man, a friend of hers, in the slums whose back is broken and his son who’s nursing him, yeah, the list goes on and on.

Why else would you be here? No way did they dump you into an era where there was no canon character, just for sh*ts and giggles? You don’t f*cking think so! This is some sort of divine amusem*nt; punishing you for being a clown!

There was only one problem: it feels as if the menace to society is avoiding you! It sounds super absurd. Yes, Edo is a big city and the chances of running into that one person you're looking for by sheer luck are not that high.Akaza's human appearance, for the most part, was almost what every other man or child looks from behind here, except for the pale blue eyes with unusually-colored pink eyelashes.

And yet, it shouldn't be that hard right?

WRONG! You even accompanied your mother to the slums, f*ck, you have even met his father already, bless his soul, he is great, but never once did you even catch a glimpse of Akaza! Not even in the places popular for thieves, nothing but you don't give up!

Maybe it is a bit selfish or unlogical as to why you want to meet him that bad but, in this era where you almost know nothing of, he was the only familiar individual for you, the only one you know and that is something you desperately cling to.

And that's why you have now this monotone lifestyle at the moment; you leave the house, walk the streets, get annoyed, and come home again.

You don't want to waste another damn year, you're already ten and that's whythis time, you have some sort of a plan, you look down at your body again, seeing how different it is from your old self—the clothes are expensive and clean, but they hide your figure quite well, on first glance you look like a boy, but if anyone looks at you a second longer could instantly tell that you’re not. It’s just to play it safe, you’re not sure if otherwise, Akaza would fall for your plan.

Your feet carry you along, heading toward the area where you know many half-rich idiots swarm like annoying flies. Your heart beats faster, the excitement building inside you as you approach closer to your goal, finding yourself standing before a large group of people gathered around a food stall. They all seem to be enjoying themselves, laughing and joking with each other.

You watch them, observing the movements of the crowd, trying to spot any suspicious characters. After a few minutes of watching, you begin to walk down the busy street again, feeling slightly disappointed. If this keeps up, once again this will end up in an unsuccessful day.

A sudden chill runs through your spine, yeah, you also remember that you almost demolished some poor boy but thanks to all the blood you don't remember his face at all, otherwise, you would probably already apologized for it. You let your guard down a bit, thinking about how embarrassing that how the whole situation was, and you beat him up for touching you. It wasn't even anything out of nasty intention, he just wanted to make sure you were alright!

But, you guess things aren't always fair sometimes but then again, what is? You sigh, well, whatever; you can live with it for now.

In one last turn of the corner, you would enter the area where you live, however, you bumped into someone, or did that person bump into you? Nah. You weren't that gullible; the moment you feel his clumsy attempt at pickpocketing you, it was obvious. No accident, but intended, a good plan but what a lousy performance.

For such actions, he has only a few seconds to be successful and out of pity, you let him steal your money without making a fuss about it, well, is it truly pity when you have already snatched his bag of money? Probably not, since he wanted to steal yours first, it's only fair.

"Sorry, my bad." The boy says, not even looking at you as he walks past you, he must have been around your age. Black hair, a dark blue-gray yukata, rather muscular for such a young age, and definitely not your problem if he cries about the moneylater. Oh, how wrong you are.

"Don't worry about it." You dismiss him, already thinking about the Mochi you will buy, his bag was definitely heavier than yours.

Walking down the road, you open up the bag, counting through the coins as you whistle. Jackpot! This day was not in vain, from rags to riches in just a few seconds. This will fill my sugar-craving tummy for the next few days.

Just then you heard a voice calling you from behind. "Hey!" It sounded rather urgent and loud.

Looking back you saw that the same black-haired kid that robbed you was chasing after you, but now that you got a pretty good look at his face, your heart beats faster! Sometimes when you meet someone, there’s a click, nothing like love at first sight or something cheesy like this, but a click that you just know that the person will become important to you.

Pale blue eyes, the ones you have been searching for the last few weeks are staring at you in disbelief as he stops before you. The boy who bathes every day in Respect Women Juice™ finally showed himself to you!Internally, you're screaming, because holy sh*t! He looks so soft compared to his demon appearance, not even his eyelashes could destroy that beautiful face, it makes it even more pretty!

Why did all the antagonists win the genetic lottery? Oh wait- never mind you just remembered Gyokko.

"Yes?" You can't help but smile at him brightly.It was about damn time you encountered him and all that thanks to your petty nature, nice! "Is something wrong?"

His face is a little bit red, is his stamina that bad that he is already exhausted after running this little? Or is it anger or embarrassment? You don't care at all, your mind is filled with hundred ways how to befriend him in the best way possible. The excitement is radiating off your body in waves, this day keeps getting better and better!

He gulps and takes a deep breath. Finally taking the courage to say, while his hand rubs his neck, and you get a glimpse of his forearm, two black criminal tattoos, "That's my money that you—"

Before he even finished talking, you grab his wrist, pulling him away from the crowd that got nosy after hearing him. Nowhere else to go, you drag him to the nearest alleyway, why Akaza, or should you, for now, call him Hakuji instead,letyou drag him around was strange.

Well, he is bewildered as to how the hell you even manage to have so much strength while having such a thin body. What do you eat every day that you canmanhandle him without even trying? Whatever it is he wants the same.

After walking a few meters ahead of everyone you pull him against the wall, closing the distance between you quickly, scolding him in the process, "That was seriously stupid of you. Why did you think it would be a brilliant idea to confront me when there were so many people around?"

Instead of the lovely smile, you wore just a few seconds ago, you frown at him, what a great way to start a friendship! But after seeing the tattoos, any soft way to handle this was out of the window. Seriously, he already had two strikes and with this stunt, he almost risked another one.

"What are you even talking about?!" His expression was a mix of confusion and irritation, which made sense since you stole his stuff, but still. "Besides, you can take a step back?! Did you never heard of personal space!?"

"Don't act like a damn damsel in distress after all you also stole from me and then you have the nerve to confront me? Are you brave or just stupid?" You scoff, before letting go of him, "Seriously, how do you think this society works? Who would they have believed more? You, the one with the criminal tattoos, or me? A helpless girl who isknown for her kindness?"

"You and kindness? Stop joking, since when were you kind in any form?" Hakuji blinks several times, shaking his head slowly, "How the hell can I be so goddamn unlucky?"

You open your mouth about to say some bullsh*t, when in fact it is the truth that you're only pretending to be kind, well, in a weird way you are kind, you don't have to help others but you still do it, only for your reputation but that's beside the point. Right now it hits you that he sounds as if he knows you! You have a bad feeling about this.

Sengoku Era Ōzora [Name] was already a pathetic and embarrassing person before you took over, you don't even want to imagine how bad this one was. Don't panic, maybe he heard from all the odd jobs you do, or maybe his father spoke about you? As if.

"Oh? Do you know me? From where?" You fake a bubbly façade, in reality, you're sweating buckets.

Your mind continuously chants f*ckf*ckf*ckf*ckf*ckf*ckf*ck like a mantra, hoping that he could at least recognize your aura as a kind person or at the very least be slightly better, a noble hero or even a nice criminal but right now you feel like the shadiest person on earth.

Not that Hakuji could tell, well, jokes on you because he can see that you're nervous as hell. The smile that you wearing right now is too stiff, nothing like the one you have shown before. Your smile is basically frozen from horror and nervousness and everything that this conversation might do to it.

"You don't remember, huh." He begins, confusing you even more with that simple statement, "I thought beating the living sh*t out of the one who pulled you out of the damn river would be some unforgettable event, looks like I am wrong."

Haha, f*ck.

The realization hit you like a ton of bricks, no, no, no, no, no! You already f*cked up the moment you woke up in this stupid era?! You're screwed, any potential friendship with him is ruined, oh gods help you, how could you be this dumb?!

For most people, it goes, observes, thinks, and then does something. But no, for you, it goes, punch your survivor in the face until you can't even recognize him and run away. Why can't you be normal for once? You screw things up without even trying at this point.

Your lower lip quivers slightly, the conflicting emotions staggering at the very bottom of your tummy. It'stime for your special move, the one you have mastered after countless missions with Shigeo, which you vowed only to use in a very hopeless situation in this life.

You drop down to your knees in front of him and no, not in the suggestive kind of way, you're bowing while your head is touching the ground, with a shaky and pitiful tone you whimper, "I am so sorry for punching you, repeatedly, and not showing any gratitude for saving me from nearly drowning! Please forgive me for my stupid behavior!"

Shigeo was an idiot, one that had the magical ability to make others angry while being oblivious about it.How the hell he could sleep at night peacefully without being tormented by his idiocy you don't know, but it was super fun to watch him rile up others or pull some stunts that left you wheezing in the background.

It was all fun and games,that is until Ubuyashiki-sama had enough of you two, and ordered you to apologize instantly whenever such an incident happened.Did they accept Shigeo's half-assed apology? Of course not, no sane person would.

Did they accept an apology from you, from a beautiful and innocent-lookingwomanwhile sounding as if you're being on the edge of tears? Which was just an act but whatever!Yes, they did, almost instantly.

The act of sitting on the ground, creating a scene, and apologizing to someone, usually the other person would have a tendency to forgive, that's seen as part of etiquette in the Japanese social consciousness. That's right, perfectly performing Dogezaand having no shameis your secret skill!!!

"Um— Get off the ground first, it's pathetic to look at," Hakuji frowns and shakes his head several times but the look he gives you is not full of anger and spite anymore, well, maybe there is a trace of that, but mostly it's mixed with confusion and embarrassment. “It's no big deal, no need to be so dramatic.”

Liar. It must have hurt his pride at least a bit a year ago.

His face still reddening, probably from the sudden situation of you kneeling and bowing in front of him but this time you weren't even acting about being remorseful, for once it is a sincere apology from you, even if it wasn't Hakuji you would have bowed and asked for forgiveness. Your mother raised you to be a decent human beingafter all!

"But it is, I was rude towards you, I should've treated you better," You mumble out loud, rubbing the small rocks away from your forehead as you stand up, luckily there's no blood but it still hurt quite a bit, "In my defense, at that moment I was almost dead or even was for a few moments, sometimes you just can't control yourself or something— Which of course doesn't completely excuse my behavior."

You give a weak smile, trying to hide the fact that you are a total idiot right now. You don't know why you did that, you should've just left it at the apology, but here you are, being dramatic again.

Hakuji is looking at you like he has never seen anything strange and bizarre before, but that is to be expected. Most people wouldn't even utter an apology to a criminal let alone bow so low before them. But there's also the matter of how you seem to be blushing like a little schoolgirl.

"I'm sorry too, I shouldn't have stolen your money, if I had known you were I wouldn't have even tried." He says while waving his hand as if to dismiss the whole matter, "So just forget it."

Does he mean he didn't do it because you're a girl or because it's you of all people?It feels like the latter, and also a bit like he just confirmed your suspicion, he avoided you! You don't know how to feel about it but you can see it in the way he avoids looking directly into your eyes, even going as far as frowning!

"You're just annoyed because I'm better at it than you." The words that involuntarily leave your mouth are soft, almost soundless, but somehow as damn loud as they echo through the alley.

There's a small pause of silence between you two, the wind blowing around you. His lips are slightly parted and his face is turned downwards as he seems to be thinking about something, or even more likely ignoring you. After several seconds have gone by he slowly turns his head up to look at you, his gaze boring straight into your eyes.

"So what? At least I'm stronger than you." He pauses to take another look at your face, "What if you get caught someday, what then? Just because you're pretty doesn't mean everyone will fall for your act."

You beg to differ, at least you know you can protect yourself, not for nothing have you spent years learning how to wield a sword. Oh— OH!

Your eyes widen as you realize the critical error you made. You don't have a katana, not even a Wakizashi, only a poorly homemade Bokken. f*ck, you hadn't thought of that, it is true that you can manipulate people with your words, but what if you get caught because of a mistake?

Of course, you're fast and everything, but you never know when you target a person, you shouldn't have at all.You got too co*cky.You always do this! You don't think things through and assume that you would win no matter what the case may be.There's that uncomfortable phantom pain in your left arm, a grim reminder of how foolish you were.

"And what about you?" You mumbleweakly, trying to ignore the discomfort once again, "No matter how strong you are, if you get caught again, it's only a matter of time before you're banished from Edo. What do you think your father would do if it came to that?"

That was harsh.Even though it's partially true, he looks like he has been punched right now. He looks confused, almost like he had expected a different reaction from you. But you don't care, you know exactly what will happen when he gets caught again.

"Why do you even care? It's not even your problem!" His brows furrow, his hands fidgeting nervously behind him, "Besides how the hell do you even know my father?"

That is where he's wrong, you're a nosy bitch but more importantly, after meeting his father, you seriously can't turn a blind eye to that. He probably knew that you're the gremlin that beat his son's face unrecognizable and he still looked at you with warm eyes. It would suck to visit him someday, just to witness him hanging from the ceiling.

"I don't know why but my mother is friends with your father, so she visits him sometimes and I tag along that's how." You answer without thinking twice, "Sometimes he talks about you, so it was not hard to figure it out, or are you not Hakuji?"

"Then you should know why I'm doing this, how else am I supposed to get the medicine for him? I can't just stop because of that." He snaps at you while pointing at his tattoos.

"Did I ever say you should stop? Just get better at it and don't get caught." You sigh, before your eyes snap to him again, "How old are you anyway?"

Is he younger or older than you? It was a random question but you can't tell his age because he's already a lot more muscular than other kids are but you remember that he would get his last tattoo at eleven.

"What the—"

"Just answer please." You interrupt him, again, which was rather rude but you want to know how much time you still have before canon comes around and annoys the living sh*t out of you.

"I turned ten two months ago." He finally says, his voice slightly hoarse and tired, "Why?"

"The same age as me!“That at least gives you a year to befriend him, nice, you can make him more skillful without being too obvious about it. And of course time for a few other things, huh, now that you're thinking about it maybe your medical knowledge could finally come in handy!

"I know." He mutters back.Poor boy, he must be so tired of your sh*t, the sun is already gone and you're still bothering him.

"Wha— Ok, whatever.“ You ignore that for now, maybe his father told him, who knows, "In any case, that rules out finding a job, or doing anything legal to earn enough money."

"If there was some other way don't you think I wouldn't have tried it? This is the only method available for me right now."

Child labor wasn't uncommon, but the conditions and the wages were utter sh*t. Even if Hakuji were to start living an honest life in his father's eyes, he wouldn't be making nearly enough money to help out and you know exploitation when you see it. Sadly when you still lived in modern times you couldn't always act your wage, but damn, maybe you should have.

You sigh while looking down at your feet as the thought of Hakuji being so young and having such a tough life, really made your heartache, that's when you realize something else, and your eyes snap to him again.

"How about we work together then?" You ask, the words leaving your lips before you could stop yourself.

"I—what?" Hakuji blinks twice but he seems confused instead of angry, "What do you mean by working together?"

"Just, think about it. How about I teach you how to steal without getting caught? Never once did someone catch me, hell, never did ever anyone suspects me! We might even work together at times, I'm good at distracting people," You exclaim, your eyes blazing with excitement, "And in return, you can teach me to defend myself, without any sword whatsoever."

It would be a win-win situation,the chance you get more time than just a year, he might not even be banished from Edo and his father won't even commit suicide.Alright, you risk that Hakuji and Koyuki may never meet but that's a problem for later!

He looks back at you like he can't believe what you just said, he opens and closes his mouth several times before saying anything. At first, he looks as if he's not going to say anything at all but finally, reluctantly, he speaks, "If I agree to this, there is one condition. You take the whole blame if something goes wrong."

"Deal!"You nod quickly and grab his hand to shake it, his face instantly turning red again, "I accept, nice doing business with you."

Hakuji is staring at you like you've grown horns, but he slowly shakes your hand. Maybe it's because he can tell from your expression that you really meant everything you said.

He still seems a bit uncomfortable but he manages to give a slight smile as he lets go, "Don't let me regret it[Name]."

So he truly has known who you are since the beginning huh? Damn, you hope the former Ōzora[Name] wasn't that much of a bitch.

Chapter 7: ACT II • Yūgen II

Chapter Text

"Ojisan, are you awake? I made some Onigiri for you!"

That was the only warning you give before you open the door to the more than small house.

How time flies when you’re trying your best to alter fate, it’s been already a few years since your embarrassing first encounter with Hakuji. By now it was common for you to at least visit every two days with or without your mother.

Sometimes even every day when you’re incredibly anxious, which is currently pretty often. The sole reason for that is how Tsukihiko started to pay attention to you when you turned 14, it’s medieval Japan, you know exactly what this means, you’re not that stupid or oblivious.

It means Tsukihiko does his job as the family head which means a not-so-lovely arranged marriage to some dickhe*d with the same social standing, and quite frankly you’re not in the mood to even humor your brother with your presence. If anything, you just want to avoid him altogether, but so far he hasn't shown any signs of giving up on his silly scheme, so you have no choice but to flee the moment you wake up every single day.

A shiver runs down your spine again, and you shake your head to get rid of the foul feeling in your stomach before you enter.

There's no need to knock, but it is proper manners to make some kind of sound so as not to startle him. You can't expect a sickly man with a bad back to get up and open the door for you every time, Soyama-san doesn't mind after all and besides, he always seems quite happy to see you and gosh you share the sentiment.

"[Name], how many times did I tell you that you don't have to do this," He looks up from the book in his lap and stares at you for a moment, then his face brightens into a smile. "You need it more than this old man right here, how else are you going to grow up someday?"

"Ojisan, stop joking. My height is normal for my age," You take off your shoes and move over to sit beside the futon, it was a newer one, one that will really keep someone warm in the winter instead of the old patched one, "Just wait, I'm sure I'll be even taller than my mother pretty soon."

"That's not what I meant," He shakes his head as he smiles again, "I mean that you have to eat if you're going to grow up healthy."

"I'm fine, you don't have to worry about me," You laugh and reach for the Onigiri, handing him one, "Besides, I am not the only one who's still growing."

He is such a gentle and warm man, his presence alone is so calming to you. You could spend hours just listening to him talk about his past, dreams, and hopes for the future.

Soyama-san should have died three years ago, the day Hakuji would have gotten his third criminal tattoo but, thanks to your efforts, he didn't. You avoided a major plot point of the story, but you know that he has little hope of ever seeing even more of the future, and you would rather not dwell on that.

In a year, Hakuji would have met Keizo and Koyuki, but looks like that isn't happening anytime soon. Do you feel bad about it? To be honest, not that much, still you send a silent apology to Hakuji's love interest for occupying him.

But, hey, you're just doing your thing, and it's not like you've been doing nothing for the past few years, besides your deal with Hakuji, you've spent some of your time helping to nurse him back to health while Hakuji was busy, with some of the money you even managed to buy some medical books but you feel as though you are doing very little for him.

The books were just almost a waste of money at the end of the day, there was hardly any useful information in them and now you are already toying with the idea of making the medicine yourself. It would definitely be cheaper, but it was hard without a proper diagnosis and it's not like the doctors of this era could give you a precise one.

Osteoporosis, rheumatoid arthritis, ankylosing spondylitis, fibromyalgia syndrome, and the list gets longer and longer.

Add to that his strong cough and these absurd living conditions. So you do what you can, keep the house in good shape, air it out as often as you can, take care of the housework, drop off food, or sometimes cook. It's not a burden for you, it's more of a natural thing and besides, it's just these little things you do but you wish you could help him more, but you don't have the skill to do so.

Besides Hakuji and you make enough so that he and his father to lead a halfway more comfortable life. Your teaching, if you can even call that, paid off quite well. After finally realizing that not only being strong is enough, but also being stealthy and having a certain knowledge of human nature.

Don't steal from the same place every day and not near the slums where someone could recognize you, change the place randomly and not according to a pattern, don't notice the faces of your victims, you accidentally steal from the same person, steal only when you are 100% sure you can do it.

But most importantly: Only steal from people who appear to be able to afford a steal. It's not something to be proud of, but then stealing it from someone who needs it as much as you do, is a big fat no.

Of course, you did not teach him anything related to the Breathing Techniques, you know your luck, and another Upper Moon who can use them? Yeah, no, you're kind of in "Team Human", and teaching potential antagonists to be even more powerful isn't pro-human at all.

Yet what you're kind of proud of is how well you and Hakuji work together, whether it's pickpocketing or taking care of his father! He even started to open up about your highly affectionate self by reciprocating your high fives, and spontaneous hugs. The thought alone that you're both smooth little criminals makes you giddy. Yoriichi surely wouldn't be delighted about you disregarding the law but that's another thought you do not entertain.

If the two of you were traveling together to do your usual job, it's even easier to get money. Most of the time you're the one distracting the targets since most people already know you and your friendly personality, which one was fake as f*ck, or what was it? Who knows. Hakuji then steals from the more than distracted person, and ta-da, it's done.

It was so easy it was almost ridiculous and by now you suspect that in a weird way, you have some sort of plot armor of your own. But it's something you can only do for a while, no matter how talented and skillful someone is, there is bound to be a casualty, a mistake and you can't afford that.

So you both started to sometimes do the odd jobs you did before, but now, you both get paid for it a bit, it's not much but you hope that someday it could become enough that you both can end your short career as thieves. Hakuji's bad reputation is also slowly but surely disappearing, it does kind of help that your own was pretty good, and yet—

Who are you kidding? It's too much fun. And as long Soyama-san doesn’t know? Well, your guilty subconscious tells you that it isn’t that fun.

"Thank you," He smiles up at you, snapping you out of your thoughts, and takes another bite. "I can't tell you how much I appreciate your mother and you taking care of me."

"You're welcome, Ojisan," You smile back, swallowing down the guilt, it was already an awkward situation telling Soyama-san the white lie that Hakuji and you only make money through the odd jobs, "It's the least I can do."

"That's just like you," He chuckles again, and his voice gets deeper, "A very nice girl, I'll be sure to thank your mother for raising such a kind child one day."

"You can thank her when she comes around later," You chuckle, looking towards the window for a moment, "She said she had to go shopping, and that should not take that long."

"Oh, is that so?" He glances down at the book on his lap for a moment and then turns the page. "Will you be on your way when she arrives?"

"Hm, yes. I have to look if Hakuji needs anything or has any problems with work. We can't have him slacking off, can we?"

He looks up at you again with that soft smile he always wears whenever you start talking about his son, "You've already taken care of him quite well so I see no need to worry but I'm glad that you both manage to become friends."

"Hakuji is a good person, very much so," You reply, feeling rather proud of the boy, even if the beginning of your friendship was not very smooth in the slightest. Soyama-san starts patting your head gently, as though to say that he is very pleased with your response to him, "He probably takes after his dad in that way, doesn't he?"

"You sure know how to flatter this old man here, don't you?" Of course, you do, His hand stops patting your head, as you giggle slightly, "I am happy to hear that though, he really is a good son. Always protect each other alright?"

"We will, Ojisan. You only have to worry about getting healthy again." It's strange hearing you talk that way, almost like a real child, when there was never any person in your life that resembled something like a father figure for you, but you're sure that Soyama-san is someone who comes closest to it.

"It's too early for that sort of thing to worry me." He grumbles softly, shaking his head and looking at you, "I'm fine."

"Yes, of course." You smile again, but the look on your face says more than a thousand words could ever say.

You know it's going to happen, maybe not soon but before long Soyama-san won't be able to get up from his futon at all anymore. He already needs the help of others for that. So while he might feel fine now, there is little doubt that his health would worsen.

You have seen his face, heard him cough, and seen him lie down in the dark, unable to move a single finger or a toe. It wasn't pleasant, and yet—

”What are you reading this time?”

“Nothing known or anything like that.”He turns towards you and smiles at you, a small gesture that seems to light up his entire body, “It’s just a short novel about a couple of swordsmen fighting against a couple of men-eating demons.”

What– You stare at him, wordless, and it takes some time until you're able to ask, "Are you sure you’re not reading The Tale of the Heike? Or was it Genji? From what I heard it’s pretty popular. ”

He looks over at the book once again, before chuckling slightly, "I can not read that story one more time, but no, it’s just a small tale about the Sengoku Era. It's a bit far-fetched but it helps against boredom.”

You can’t even act to be surprised by this, maybe a survivor wrote it, or some former slayer to help the organization gain some public attention. But it sure as hell reminds you to get some sort of lock for this house, and wisteria, and some sort of weapon or anything. Yeah no, you shouldn't take any chances.

Yet, you would lie if you say you do not miss being a Demon Slayer. You weren’t one for that long and your end was kind of not heroic at all but– You don’t know where to even begin to start to search for the organization and in Hakuji’s backstory there was no demon or slayer present.

Well, except Muzan but that would result in another Bad End for you, so no thanks. You still shiver when you see any reddish color that resembles his eyes, and you are very glad to have two functional arms again. No way you would risk having one ripped off again.

So you can only give Soyama-san an unsure smile, not at all having a small mental panic attack before the two of you then turn back to each other, he continues to read the book and you continue to watch him while cleaning around the small house.

“You’re still here?" You turn around as Hakuji approaches you from behind.

It must be quite the sight for him right now. You've already cleaned most of thehouse, so you started keeping yourself busy outside of the house,yourhands are stained with dust and dirt, but it's still strange to see youdoing something without gaining anythingin return. What a shock.

But seriously, at this point, wouldn't it be easier if this two moved into your home?Even if you miraculously manage to repair this, it would still be more comfortable for everyone. Maybe you should bother your mother about it later-

Ah, wait never mind, Tsukihiko would throw a fit. An unmarried young woman living together with the rumored Demon Child? Your value would sink drastically, not that you care.

"Of course," you turn back around and smile up at him,“Someone has to keep him company after all. Especially now that you've finally learned not to get caught.”

Hakuji grins slightly and shakes his head, "At least I learned something. You're still just as bad as when I started teaching you how to fight.”

He does have a point. You might have picked up quite a few moves by now but there is no denying that your skill level is nowhere near his, and he only keeps getting better and better! Good for him, it sucks for you., but if you had a proper Katana you could take him easily in a fight.

“I'm just better at stabbing people instead of punching them.”You reply with a smile and lean back against the wall, stretching out your legs, "Besides, there is no reason to stab anyone unless they deserve it."

Hakuji hums quietly to himself before shrugging, "Well, I guess that's true enough, but I know you would stab people if it weren't for the risk of getting caught."

"Am I that predictable?" You laugh softly to yourself, ah, since when does he know you so well? Four years of meeting almost every day do its wonders but still, he doesn't even realize that what he said was incredibly rude, yet somehow you don't mind. It's actually kind of comforting.

"A little bit," He says bluntly, causing you to chuckle again. "But then again, sometimes I can be pretty clueless about your thoughts."

You can only give him a small smile at this because we'll, yeah, it would be bad if he could, to be honest.

Even though your relationship has grown a lot over these past four years, there's just no way that you're telling him that one day you're leaving. As much as you want to talk about whatever you want with him, especially now that he knows more about you than most other people around here, it wouldn't really be right in a sense.

Your plan was to leave when you either are completely sure that Hakuji will not be banned from Edo or when through the never-ending fate, you miraculously drop him off at Koyuki’s.

You hope for the first option though, that way you would have more time than just three years to embark on a holy journey to find a six-eyed demon who deserved to get punished. Or you could just take matters into your own two hands and finish off the sixty-something no-name characters before they could poison someone and then vanish into the night.

And by the looks of it, your mother is starting to pick up hints as well; she's been acting strange recently which is probably why you feel like something is going wrong. Maybe there's nothing, but maybe there's something, maybe that something is the bane of your existence named Tsukihiko.

That stupid idiot should think about his own marriage and not yours because you will not marry someone he picks for you. Nope. Nein. Not happening.

You shrug away all these thoughts when Hakuji interrupts them, "You look worried."

"I'm not." You lie, it's not exactly a lie, you're just annoyed. Why couldn't you have gotten reincarnated without knowing anything at all? Living a bliss full life of a fool instead of worrying every second of your existence?

"Really? You've got dark circles under your eyes," He points out, "You're even grumpier than usual."

Oh yes, very observant of him, “Maybe I'm just a bit tired–”

You try to play with your nonexistent earrings, a habit you can't get rid of no matter how much time passed when you notice that Hakuji has already grabbed your wrist. You start to pull back in confusion when he shakes his head slightly, still holding onto you tightly as he proceeds to clean off your dirty hands with his sleeve.

Your lips part in shock as he starts rubbing your hand gently while he cleans off the dirt from the cracks between your fingers and then from the tips.

As the wind continues to blow, just for the tiniest moment, instead of black, you saw long red hair, but it was over the moment you blinked.

You have no idea what to do, but you just smile softly at the boy before you, “What a gentleman you are, I remember when you flinched every time I breathed the same air as you.”

Even if Hakuji always rolls his eyes or lets out an annoyed huff as an answer, he always does these small gestures to make sure you're comfortable. What a tsundere.

At that, he rolls his eyes, "Who wouldn't? Your punch hurt more than any beating I ever got.”

Ah, good memories. "Stop being so extravagant, you're only saying this to make me feel better.”

"Maybe, is it at least working?" Hakuji pokes your cheek playfully.

“Maybe?” You sigh dramatically, feeling strangely like yourself again.

Even if just for a few moments, and staring at Hakuji's messy hair and scratched-up face; even though it's just for a short period of time, it's almost like seeing a completely different person.

He doesn't look as soft as he did, puberty is hitting him hard. That reminds you–

“Hey Hakuji, let's steal a sword.”

Hakuji freezes midway through cleaning another part of your finger with his sleeve, he looks up in confusion to meet your gaze, eyes wide open. After an awkward silence that could probably kill someone else with its weight, "Why would we want to do that?"

You glance down at your now clean hands and snort lightly before shaking your head and letting go of your breath, "It's been a while since we stole together? For the last few months, it was either you or me, so why not?”

The memory of how it felt when you held your first own katana, how heavy it was, how cool it looked, how it cut through the air… it makes you excited just thinking about it. It would not be a Nichirin, but it's better than your bokken.

"You're right but..." He says with his eyes closed, he keeps rubbing his hand on yours, still hesitating. “It's not something we can just pickpocket from someone.”

Should you be concerned that he doesn't even question you as to why you suddenly want one or have that annoyingly fuzzy feeling right now? Doesn't matter.

You give him a knowing smile, "We have to find one somewhere, either from some blacksmith or some drunken Samurai or even better Rōnin!”

He groans at your enthusiasm and starts to scratch his head, a clear sign for you that he's already trying to formulate a plan, "I don't think that they'd leave their swords unattended around here."

That is true; the most common thing people carry around with them is money and valuables; however, there is always the chance of getting lucky.

“I mean, instead of stealing we could just do what Benkei did?”

“Benkei, as in Musashibō Benkei the monk who tried to take some swords from various samurai in a duel?”

Benkei was said to have wandered around Kyoto every night on a personal quest to take 1000 swords from samurai warriors, who he believed were arrogant and unworthy.He is commonly depicted as a man of great strength and loyalty, and a popular subject ofJapanesefolklore, but that's beside the point.

You gave him finger guns, when Hakuji furrows his brows at your actions, because, “That's correct, I'm surprised you know that.”

“Did father read that book again?”

"No, he has a new one, it's even more absurd but that doesn't matter.”You wave away his words without realizing how cute you look when you pout,"The point is, that would be perfect for us since we're both far stronger than any regular person and can beat anyone else. Or most of them.”

Hakuji blinks several times before opening his mouth to speak once again, "Why not just steal the one from your brother?”

You want to flick his forehead, and you would have if he doesn't have a vice grip on your hands. That his face isn't completely erupted in a scarlet red blush by now is a wonder. Or he just doesn't realize it.

But how can he be so intelligent and dumb at the same time?

“Steal the sword from Tsukihko, who works for the magistrate, and who would the second his sword is missing drag you personally to the magistrate because he's totally the biggest fan of our friendship,” It's your turn to sign heavily, “If you want your third criminal tattoo that bad just say so.”

He growls under his breath but relaxes visibly after a moment of silence, then shakes his head while meeting your eyes seriously.

"I just can't win against you, can I? Especially your random ideas.” You're still waiting patiently for an answer until he finally sighs loudly and releases his hold over you with a shrug, "Fine, let's see where we end up going with this."

He really can't say no to you. You give him a triumphant smile as you threw yourself at him, trapping him in a hug.Now his face is decorated with a blush, and the only thing he could do was pat your head before trying to break free from you, “But if you get caught, you're alone!”

"Well, I don't plan on getting caught," Your voice mocks and Hakuji narrows his eyes dangerously for a split second before relaxing back into his normal expression, but not without taking his hands off of your waist. “And even if I do, it doesn't matter.”

"Why?" He asks casually but it feels like there is more behind it than what meets the eye.

You tilt your chin up slightly as you step away from him, even though the gesture is done almost automatically, "Because I am always ready to fight any battle."

You both know that the real reason that you aren't worried about being found out is that you'll find some way to escape or use the situation to your advantage somehow. So instead, why worry about something that will most likely not happen?

Hakuji tilts his head at you questioningly, "Do you ever think of how people would feel if they knew that you are actually a criminal?"

"I can tell you that I'd rather be hated for what I have done and be happy with who I truly am than be loved for who I pretend to be. As long as I have someone by my side who understands me, who believes in me and I believe in them then who cares about the rest."

He sighs and gives you a pensive look, "A simple “I don't care” would have been enough.”

“Then why ask?”

The wind continues to blow, pushing around the two of you. The cool air makes you shiver in a comfortable sort of way.

"Right, why do I even bother?" Hakuji grins playfully at you, before shaking his head, "Well if we're doing this, we should wait until the festival–”

“Festival!?” You cut him off midway through his sentence because your heart begins beating wildly once again, excitement welling up inside you. Now that it was mentioned, you have never been to one, not in your past life and certainly not in this one!

"Yes, did you forget? It's already May again.” Hakuji was thrown off by your sudden excitement, but he scratches his cheek thoughtfully and quickly gets back on track, "That means the shrine's annual spring festival will be starting soon."

Your eyes are shining brightly now as if the sun itself has descended from above. With the perfect timing as well; you cannot think of anything better than stealing a sword during a celebration where everyone is drinking heavily, plus seeing an authentic traditional festival for the first time? You call that a win!

Hakuji looks at you oddly and shakes his head while making a confused face, "You are acting as if it's a big deal.”

It's not like you want to steal Koyuki’s glorious firework moment with Hakuji or anything, no you want something so much better–

"There'll be so much food, Hakuji! How can I not be excited?” You grin at him like an idiot and before the realization hits you, “Wait, can we even afford any food there? Do we have enough money?”

He chuckles slightly and pokes your nose teasingly, “Don't worry about the cost. We have more than enough, thanks to the odd jobs we do. Besides, we have enough medicine for time being.”

"That's good to hear." You sigh, feeling a little bit less worried about your decision. After all, you're sure that this will work out.

The night feels endless, though it was not very long ago that you had set off on your own journey alone, you didn't want to take up more of Hakuji’s precious time after all.

But as soon as you said goodbye to him, promising to meet up with him in the morning again, an uncomfortable feeling was spreading inside you. It is not the same sensation as when you hunted down demons, or when one was trying to ambush you.

Thanks to this new life– or new body that hasn't awakened the mark, your senses were sharp again, and you would know when one was following you.

It is a different feeling, one that made your heart feel heavy and dull, just as if someone were pouring sand down into your stomach through the top of your throat. What makes it worse is that you couldn't pinpoint what it could possibly be, whether it's from just a bad gut feeling or guilt, you cannot tell.

Perhaps it is just because you know start with your own plan after all these years? A katana was only the first small step, but one that made it all far more real.

Not even stepping into your own home give you any comfort, but it should be alright, your mother was still with Soyama-san and Hakuji. But without knowing why exactly, something was making you uneasy; maybe it was something else entirely. For example—

“[Name], how about we have a talk?”

Ah, of course, he would be the reason for that, your brother, Tsukihiko. Your face instantly morphs into a frown after seeing him, standing there with his stupid face. He had never looked more annoying than now.

In the Sengoku Era, you avoided him like the plague, because it wasn't necessary to develop any form of kinship with him. As quick as you were in his life, you were gone again.In this one though, you're forced to spend at least a bit of time with him, but you've already spoken with him enough times, so there isn't much left to say, except the occasional 'Hello', and whatever useless words he could think up at this point.

Thinking he some hot sh*t for being the head of the household. It's not like you dislike him or anything, it's more of just your modern mindset clashing heavily with his, which makes it hard for either of you to not end a discussion without someone yelling some insults.

"Oh? What did I do now?" You ask playfully, forcing some sort of friendly smile on your face, you truly try not to sound annoyed, but in reality, you are, maybe because of his attitude, which he seems to have learned from your father. "I can't think of anything as to why you should pay any attention to me."

He looks back at you with an unamused expression, "Don't try too hard dear sister."

You wanna vomit, it's that bad huh? Calling you dear sister, that he doesn't shiver in disgust is almost worthy of praise from you. Almost, yeah, you're done already.

"I am always trying my hardest, dear brother," Your voice is dripping poison while his eyes narrow slightly at the sight of your reaction. Why he is even here is beyond your understanding, but when a member of your family visits the house where you are staying, then naturally you have to acknowledge their presence. And that's what you did, so it's time to dip again, "You know what, I think I forgot something at Soyama-san's home, let's talk later."

You make sure to add a small bow as you try to leave, with the hope to escape quickly. Not for him, or because of him, but because if you stayed around him any longer than necessary, you would definitely scream.

Physically he's as much as a threat to you as a butterfly, mentally, no big deal, but something about him just brings out your childish side. Something about him pisses you off and you don't even understand it, or how he managed to get under your skin like this.

"Whatever you forgot can wait." He says, blocking your way to the door, "We need to talk about something."

Next time you like to get reincarnated as an only child, thank you very much.

“What is it Tsukihiko?" You sigh, knowing that it's probably best to just hear him out and be done with it, just like ripping off a bandage, "What could be so important that you even came home earlier and made sure that mother isn't home."

His eyes narrow dangerously at your comment before he smiles at you, a shiver runs down your spine when suddenly, "Marriage."

"You're getting married? Who's the unlucky girl that you manage to pay—"

"No, you are."

OH HELL NO, PUT THE BANDAGE BACK ON.Well—It's not a shocker, not really. You're far more surprised by your own reaction, and not without reason, because even Tsukihiko looked at you as if you have gone mad.

You snorted at his declaration. before interrupting into loud laughter, looking at him closely, wondering if he was actually serious or joking around. He looks completely serious though; he's not smiling and his eyes are focused on yours.

"No way, that's ridiculous! Why would I ever wanna marry someone handpicked by you?" You laugh harder until tears begin running down your cheeks and you wipe them away hastily, "Brother, are you serious? No, you can't be, did you forget how old I am? Fourteen, as in, I should play with dolls and not play wife."

"I am serious, and it is not uncommon for women your age. Playing with dolls? You?Mother should have already thought you the way of managing a household."

"Women? That's not the right word, you mean girls, young girls who aren't even adults, brother."

Your face contorts in disgust when you remember the fact that he isn't wrong, in this era, it was quite common, which doesn't mean you will smile and go along with it. What disgusted you, even more, was the thought of becoming some man's property, just because your brother decided it for political reasons, or just to birth an heir.

"You're being stupid." You say, still debating if you should laugh again, just for your own amusem*nt.

He sighs dramatically, like the utter bitch that he is, and shakes his head, "I'm sorry, but I've been thinking about this for a long time now. I wanted to tell you first instead of going behind your back."

"Which you already did, didn't you?" You point out, deadpanning at him, "Don't think I haven't noticed how restless mother is these past weeks."

It wouldn't be strange for her to want to find a husband for you soon, but you have a hard time believing that she would agree to a loveless marriage or one where you have no say in it at all. She values the happiness of her children over anything else, perhaps that's the reason why Tsukihiko is practically ambushing you.

Trying to convince you to submit to this absurd plan of his, jokes on him, the last time you were engaged you ran away. Ain't no way you wouldn't do the same again, well, if it weren't for Hakuji—

"It's not like I'm forcing you into it," His voice sounds slightly desperate like he wants to convince himself more than anyone else. "But it's one of your responsibilities as a member of this family, and it's what father would want too."

"And why should I care about the opinion of a corpse?" You scoffed, turning your eyes away from him. It hurts you deeply, deep down your bones, "Besides, what makes you think you have the right to decide such things? Father is dead, and I won't allow you to use him as an excuse or as a tool to manipulate me into giving in!"

To be honest, you don't care in the slightest about what your father would have thought or not, no, what pains you actually is that you do care about what specific remains would think of you now.

Would Yoriichi want this for you?

A loveless marriage, but a chance of a life without involving yourself in things that shouldn't matter anymore? Situations that may cost you your life once again? Like your desperate wish to search for his brother,Yoriichi would surely disapprove. Or would he see your current situation differently? Maybe he'd support you wholeheartedly, even approve of it.

He frowns at your harsh tone, "Do you want to continue living like this forever?"

"What is that supposed to mean?" You asked incredulously.

"It means," He takes a moment to gather his thoughts, or to brace himself for your reaction, "you should stop playing around with that boy and start taking things seriously. You know, it might seem fun right now, but sooner or later, you little "friendship" with that little thief from the slums, don't you understand? It will tarnish our reputation, it will drag our name through the dirt."

It took everything in you to remain calm and keep your mouth shut; you knew that there was nothing you could say that wouldn't be an insult to your brother's sole existence. Instead, you remained silent, you felt almost sick hearing his words, as they echoed inside you, and as an answer to this you could only think:

What the actual f*ck, who does he think he is?

"That's not fair, brother," You finally spit the venom out, "I'm not like you, I don't care about appearances, I live my own life, I'm allowed to do what I please, and befriend whoever I want. What right do you have to tell me otherwise?"

You're angry, annoyed, and frustrated, but most of all you're afraid, you feel fear rising up within you because you've realized that you're losing control.

It's not his business how you choose to live your own life, nor is it his place to judge you for it. He must know that, you're sure he knows it, yet he still tries to force his opinion upon you, even after all you've said to him, even though he understands the consequences, knowing fully well that you'll hate him for this decision afterward, or lose at the very least any form of respect you had for him.

But how can you blame him for this, it isn't his fault, and maybe deep down he doesn't want this for his own sister. Maybe right now, you're the brat, the stubborn brat, because he is doing his job as the head of the household, as the one to secure a future for this family as the oldest sibling, while you are acting defiant.

But despite that, you simply don't want to, and that's not his fault. The problem is you can't bring yourself to bend to his will, to accept to marry someone you don't know or care about, someone that just isn't—

You close your eyes tightly as you bite your lower lip, fighting back your urge to cry.

"I guess you got your heart set on marrying a poor farmer, or a ronin, whatever." His words sting you because what a fool he is, he simply doesn't get it, "But I advise, you should get this childish thought out of your head. It's time to take responsibility."

"I never said—"

"You don't have to say it." He cut you off with another sigh. You hold onto your self-control desperately, holding back the rage boiling within you as you stare at your older brother, who stands there, hands tucked behind his back. This is the first time you realize he truly resembles your father.

Fine, if he doesn't want to hear anymore, then you're done. It's not like as if he ever intended to find a solution or to ask about your thoughts. It was just him informing you of his decision, without your mother interfering in it.

What a clever move from him, but jokes on him if he thinks he won, just as you told Hakuji, you're ready to fight any battle. Especially this one, since he is clearly unaware of how far you would go to get your way. Some things may be out of your hand, but dear god, you have read enough Korean novels, and you are prepared, well, kind of.

So, you glare at him coldly, feeling your resolve slowly returning, "Don't expect me to simply accept this, Brother."

Tsukihiko's jaw twitches, anger flaring up in his eyes, but he quickly regains composure. Before he has the chance to speak, before you can make him regret saying those cruel words, you just show him your precious middle finger.

Then you turn around and leave.

Chapter 8: ACT II • Yūgen III

Chapter Text

You wake up drenched in sweat and shaking all over, gasping for air like you ran miles. Your breathing calms down a bit, and you look around to confirm you're safe, that you're alone, and thatI was once again just one of your endless nightmares.

As much as you try to push them aside, however, the image ofyourselflying broken against the tree still lingers in your mind, your throat constricts with sorrow as you rememberthe pain, and the terror you felt as you lay there bleeding, helpless. You shudder involuntarily remembering the sensation of warm blood trickling down your chest, staining your clothes red.

The ghost pain that shoots through your arm again, will there ever be a time when you will forget it? You can't help but wonder, why now you started dreaming of this wrenched night again. It's been a long time since you last had those kinds of dreams, and it scares you, terrifies you, and it makes you question yourself.

There are so many emotions swirling inside your heart that you don't know which ones to follow and focus on. You can hardly bear it and you shake your head furiously, trying to dispel the memory of your nightmare or memory? You don't know, you just try to regain your sense of reality.

In some twisted way, it was better than the other ones, the others where you always recall all the wonderful memories, the happy moments spent together with your loved ones, your friends, and your comrades alike. Those times when you laughed, smiled, cried, fought, argued, and played with each other.

But you have come to realize lately, that every loss, big or small, leaves a scar on your soul. Not even death can erase that wound, leaving behind its ugly scars, that's why you prefer the ones with you lying against the tree, just waiting for the end.

It doesn't matter, it shouldn't matter.

You wipe tears from your eyes as you struggle to sit up and rub your throbbing temple, hoping that by doing so you can ease the ache. You stumble to your feet, barely able to put weight on your leg, but you manage nonetheless. Yes, in a few moments, the sensation will be gone again, just like always.

And today, you have to be strong. Today you can't be distracted by your fickle feelings or your unending grief. So let us pray, that you don't break. Let us hope, that you can stay strong throughout it all. For you cannot afford to fall apart.

No time to dwell on the past, or on what unholy conversation you had with Tsukihiko days ago, these are problems for another day.

The festival begins today, meaning the first step in your plan starts today.

Right now, the sun has risen higher, and you need to get ready. You slip into your kimono and tie up the obi, you brush your hair until it shines, putting extra effort into getting it neat and tidy.

There was no particular reason as to why, but you just feel like it, yes, once in a while you actually care about your appearance. Huh, never would you have thought to dress up for stealing, but here you are. Well, it's actually for the festival, but who cares, you are pretty, you feel pretty and ultimately it makes you feel better about yourself.

"[Name]." You hear someone call out, and you spin around, finding Tsukihiko standing outside of your room. The sliding doors are still closed, and so you let your face constrict into a disgusted expression.

Ever since that conversation, he has been even more annoying than before. Every time he speaks, every time he looks at you, you can see him planning out how high your value on the marriage market must be, probably. You don't care, or you wish you didn't.It was hard to not care when he quite frankly is not discreet about it.

And no matter how much it angers you, how you would love to start being an absolute dick towards him, crush his pride and self-esteem, you can't. Just because you’re angry doesn’t mean you have the right to be cruel.

This makes the idea of runningaway suddenly sound like a good idea again, the last time you did it it worked out quite well. Why shouldn't it this time? Oh right, no Yoriichi, not even a half-thought-through plan, so never mind— for now.

“I’m having murder thoughts. Come back later.”

"No."

Damn it.

After another lovely session with Tsukihiko, you fled into the slums, again. Where else would you go if not there?

And the result of the little fight with your brother was that you're deeply saddened by the missed opportunity of a queen unable to maximize your slay. That's right, you sucked this time badly, no cheeky comeback, no mental breakdown from your brother's side.

Nothing but exhaustion, whichwas bad, really bad.

And so, once more, you find yourself in the household of Soyama-san and Hakuji. The house is quiet as you walk into the house, where you spot Hakuji preparing something in the cauldron, while Soyama-san is reading some kind of book, deep into it as usual.

“Good morning!” You greet them, smiling brightly.

Your presence is immediately felt as you come in, and they both turn toward you at once, as they greet you back. Smiling as you see them bow to you. Soyama-san is smiling and looks relaxed, her face is full of cheer and kindness, just like he always does, although, he appears somewhat more tired than usual.

"Good morning." He smiles back. "Are you feeling well today?"

"I am fine, it's been a long day already, though." You respond, trying not to think of the sh*tshow that occurred over the past few days but then again, every day is like this. And so, it has become an everyday routine, to be honest, one that is rather boring in retrospect, but that is not something you feel like dwelling upon today. "I hope I don't bother you two?"

"You know you could never be a bother. Why wouldn't we be happy to have you around?" The older man tells you, his smile wide before his expression became a bit strained, "But are you sure you are alright? You don't look well."

You blink, ah, yes, don't you love it when your complexion betrays you when you try to lie your way through life?

Before you have a chance to deny it, Hakuji was already on your side, abandoning whatever task he did to reach out his hands to touch your face. He slowly reaches out to catch a loose strand of your hair, tucking it gently back behind your ear, before he slowly glides his thumb across your cheekbone inspecting the dark circles under your eyes with a worried expression.

Your mind must have shortcuts for a few moments because you can't even register whatever questions he's sending your way as he tilts your chin up, forcing your head to look into his eyes. You're by far not immune to such intimate gestures, and the biggest question is since when was he so touchy?

Ah, probably from you, who else if not you? You love to show affection towards your loved ones. But being on the receiving end turns you into a mess. The way he caresses your face feels so pleasant, and yet it's a bit unnerving, too, making your heart race as his hand lingers there.

Time to stop, you can simp later. Preferable when you're alone, and not in the presence of his father for example.

"I've had a lot on my mind lately, you see." You explain to him, patting his hand away before he has a chance to do anything else, like invading even more of your personal space, you're not sure how much longer you can keep a stoic face. "Nothing to be worried about."

"That is good to hear?" Hakuji blinks at his hand, before abruptly turning his face away, trying to hide his blush as. he makes his way back to the cauldron. Cute, but sucks to be him since everyone in this room has already seen it.

Soyama-san, however, merely nods his head while throwing a knowing look in your direction, "That is all right. If you ever need someone to talk to, then we will be here. Isn't that right Hakuji?"

He doesn't answer but just shrugs his shoulders, you feel an overwhelming urge to pat him on his head like a kid. He's cute and awkward, it's rather hard not to smile when looking at him, and he does have a very appealing face, even if you haven't really noticed until now. Well, you have, but now that he's looking more and more like his adult version?

Damn, you're so weak to handsome or beautiful faces, or how Michikatsu would have said it, you have no shame whatsoever.

"Thank you for your kindness." You shake yourself from such thoughts as you turn to help Hakuji with whatever needs to be done, you can see that his father wants to say something but he seems reluctant to do so, perhaps afraid that you might be offended.

And so, you try to keep your mind focused on work, cutting some vegetables into smaller pieces to add them to the soup pot that Hakuji has prepared. You stir and chop away for a while as Soyama-san watches you curiously. It feels good to be around other people, especially people that seem so kind and caring.

But there is a certain tension that permeates through the house, as you watch your hands working with such delicate movements. It makes it harder and harder to concentrate as time passes by.

After several minutes of silence, Soyama-san is breaking it, "I hope you don't mind me asking [Name], but are you feeling unwell about what your mother has told me?"

You frown, unsure of what he means, and then your eyes widen as you realize the implication of his words. Without a doubt that it had something to do with the whole marriage bullsh*t, after all, Soyama-san and your mother are close, so it wouldn't be weird if he knew about how the Ōzora household was currently chaotic.

At your side, Hakuji looks confused but you shake your head in response to his questioning look. Wondering how the hell he doesn't know anything about whatever you and his father are talking about. Did he miss something?

"Ah, she told you?" You ask with a forced smile, "It's nothing major, it's just annoying how my brother tries to manipulate me, even though I have already made it clear I am not interested in the whole thing."

"Well, yes, she did," The older man smiles softly, his expression softening at your reply. "But sadly, you can't expect him to stop. After all, he is your brother. He would want to do what is best for you. I was quite surprised to learn that your brother has been in such an uproar lately since he has been so quiet otherwise."

"What?" Hakuji's head turns in your direction, "Since when is your brother interested in anything that has to do with you? Didn't he ignore you all this time?"

"And I wholeheartedly wished that he would go back to these sweet times, but no, he suddenly loves to make me suffer." You sigh, before shaking your head, "He's so dumb."

"It is as I suspected, he's a moron." Hakuji nods, a small smile creeping on his face as he leans towards your ear, "Do you want me to punch him? I know that would make you happy."

You feel the heat rising up your cheeks and you have to force yourself to look away from his blue eyes. Instead, you nudge his side, "Oh yeah, please, if you don't care about getting another pretty tattoo on your arm."

"You think they are pretty?"

What?You try to pretend that you didn't just hear what you heard, because, well, weird.

"Hakuji, you shouldn't call someone a moron," Soyama-san breaks the momentary silence between the two of you, and you almost thanked him, almost, "He is just trying to do what he has to do as the head of the family."

At this point, you're exhausted again. Yes, you get it, sucks to be reincarnated into a time where such things are normal but still, you don't really feel like having to go along with every bullsh*t that gets thrown your way. You don't like the idea of having to deal with your brother's constant bickering. He's an idiot. And you're sick of it.

But, you have no choice, you have to stay, and why? Because you are trapped here, and it is your own fault, you did it to yourself. Because you want to save the lives of people that technically you don't even know. Because you are a selfish brat who likes to think that she is doing something worthwhile, that you're important.

Laughable, truly, you couldn't change the fate of Michikatsu and Yoriichi. You could leave at any time, but then what? Where would you go?

It's tiring, being stuck here, constantly trying to solve a problem that can't be solved, trying to make sense of something that makes no sense, trying to put a puzzle together that is never going to be solved, it is exhausting, it is frustrating, it is maddening.

"Is that so?" You try to keep your voice level, but it's difficult, and Hakuji sees this as his cue to start preparing the table for breakfast.You give them a smile, but it's not very convincing as you continue to busy yourself with the kitchen chores.

You are so tired, you don't even want to eat anymore.

"Yes, of course." Soyama-san nods, "It's only natural that he wants to find a suitable and good husband for you."

Your heart stops at the sound of shattering bowls, as you look around the room, what the hell?

You see that Hakuji had dropped them, a bewildered expression on his face, as his eyes snap towards his father, who only looks only apologetic.You, on the other hand, were already on the floor, trying to pick up the broken pieces of china, you quickly realized that the damage was beyond repair, and you couldn't help but let out a frustrated sigh.

"You are joking right?" Hakuji asks while he is slowly snapping out of his daze, reaching down to help you, "Marriage? Seriously?"

You shake your head, looking down at your hands, and suddenly it feels like a big deal. It's not. It's just a stupid tradition that you do not even agree with, but with Hakuji suddenly behaving this way, it is hard to have any eye contact with him. It is hard to tell what he even is thinking.

"Yes, seriously." You say after a long while of silence, your head still down so that nobody sees how you roll your eyes, "But it doesn't matter, it's not like I agree. So it's not like I have to go through with it."

"Oh, okay," He says, looking at you in a strange way as if he's not sure how to take what you just said. "So you don't have to go through with it?"

Preferably no, of course not, but this universe has the tendency to spit in your face for sh*ts and giggles, so now you're actually nervous.

This feels like a cliche trope of a Korean webtoon, the one where the protagonist makes a deal with some mysterious Duke of the North with black hair and blue eyes, and proposes a marriage of convenience because she has full knowledge of the future, great right?

Would be amazing if you could do that, only that the humble you do not know any goddamn Duke or anyone else for that matter. Hell, your knowledge of the future is completely useless since Hakuji's backstory is focused on his father and Koyuki, and you're not exactly a historian.

You look a Hakuji, who in return looks at you with hopeful eyes as you try to formulate some sort of answer that doesn't involve lying, so, well, this sucks. Seriously, now you want some sort of secretive duke of the north, then you would at least marry someone handsome.

Black hair and blue eyes don't sound so bad, tho.

Wait. Hakuji has black hair and blue eyes, and he's handsome, maybe-

"Well, it is a custom, isn't it?" Soyama-san answers for you, "At one point [Name] has to get married."

Oh wow, that gave you a very much-needed reality check, what the f*ck were you thinking?

You turn your head away from Hakuji, picking up the rest of the shards from the ground while Soyama-san is patting his son's back in what can only be described as a comforting manner, which makes you tilt your head.

You beg to differ because you have to do sh*t if you don't want to and why does Hakuji need comfort? Aren't you the victim of this whole mess?

How unfair, if anything you should get your head patted or something.

"No way, what if her brother sells her off to some old creep!" Hakuji exclaims as if the thought just came to him, "Or she ends up with a weirdo that she can't stand! I'm telling you, there is no way I will allow it."

That makes your heart almost swoon, how precious he is, you can't help but smile, and you feel a rush of warmth, a sudden wave of emotion that you don't quite understand, it is not an unfamiliar sensation.

Soyama-san chuckles at this, "Then why don't you marry [Name]?"

"What the fu—"There's a sharp pain as you curse out loud, because of this ridiculous statement, you cut yourself and you're not sure if you heard him right. But it looks like your ears are perfectly working, it really doesn't help that his expression slowly turns into one as if he just heard the best goddamn suggestion of his life.

Haha. What is happening?

The rest of the morning, no, the whole day until the evening was pure awkwardness and discomfort. You're not used to seeing Hakuji act like this, it is strange, it is unexpected, and you don't know what to do.

Was this really such a big deal to him? It was after all just a joke, nothing to grumble over for a whole day, especially not when you both had some critical plans.

But, well, it is also a little bit annoying, so much so that you end up leaving the house for a while, you know, just to clear your head. You are a little surprised when Hakuji follows you and so you're fine with that.

"Where are we going?" He asks, looking every were but you as you walk side by side, "I didn't expect you to leave the house."

"To the festival, where else?" You reply, keeping your voice light as you look up at the sky, enjoying the warm breeze against your skin, "Plus, we had some plans for tonight."

Hakuji frowns as he walks next to you, "Maybe it is a bit late to ask but why do you even need one?"

You really wanna have a sword, and you will get one, even without him. The urge to stab some people has been over the roof the last few days, and you're not sure how long you can contain your anger until you start demolishing random things, or your brother, or setting your brother on fire.

Yes, arson sounds like heaven.Now that you think about it, you can't even remember when the last time was that you had a chance to do something that was just for you.

"It's just something I want to do," You explain, “Like it’s just personal preference.”

“Whether or not to stab someone is not personal preference.”

You sigh and bite your tongue, that is so not true, but that is beside the point, you're not going to kill anybody, yet.

"I just feel like getting a sword would make me feel more complete," You say, and Hakuji gives you a curious look, "Maybe then people will start to fear me, plus, if I don't need it anymore we can sell it."

"I know you don't mean to, but sometimes you come across as very villainous."

You laugh and roll your eyes, "Thank you!"

"That wasn't a compliment." He starts poking your cheek again, so you grab his hand and intertwine your fingers.

You just shrug, because why not? It's not like you would care if someone truly saw you as some sort of villain. It wouldn't make much difference in the grand scheme of things, so in the long run, who cares? Well, and to be fair, you shouldn't even exist.

"So what kind of blade did you want?" He asks after a while, "A katana? A wakizashi?"

Your eyes widen a bit when he says this since you haven't thought about it before now, "Well, to be fair, I can't really be picky. I am going with the first thing we find."

He only sighs at this, but you're not wrong. You both can be considered lucky if you even find some drunken samurai far enough from the festival and preying eyes.

"Lighten up Hakuji, it could be a whole lot worse!" You pat his shoulder, "Like, I don't know, Imagine we would be amateurs! That would suck."

“But it could definitely be a whole lot better too.”

"And my will to live is dwindling at an alarming rate, but you don't see me complaining, are you?" You say to him as you look ahead, "So, suck it up buttercup, we’ve got work to do."

You want to get this over with as quickly as possible, you've been planning for ages, and for once the plan isn't falling apart on its own. No, this time, you have a pretty good feeling that everything will go according to the script.

So, you smile brightly at the boy beside you, as you pull him towards the bustling festival, "It's crime time, Hakuji!"

The sun has long set by the time you find what you were looking for, a drunken idiot, hopefully, a Rōnin, who was probably trying to go home but decided that the shabby back alley with trash lying around was the perfect place for a nap. Not that you're judging him, because what a mood, if you could you would do the same.

But in the end, you're in fact heavily judging him.

"Is it really that easy?" Hakuji asks you in a hushed tone while looking at the man as if he was garbage, as you approach the man who is laying against some house, "There's just something about it that bugs me, but I can't put my finger on it."

You nod your head while taking a closer look.

The poor guy is so out of it, he doesn't even notice you kicking him, of course only softly. He is truly super drunk, or did he got knocked out? That would explain the smell of iron, but he's breathing so it doesn't matter, you will have a moral conflict with yourself another day, he doesn't even realize when you take his sword.

It is a beautiful katana, at first look, it is well-maintained and probably very well-forged, you would know since you've seen quite a few masterpieces that some Demon Slayer had in the Sengoku Era, so you're mildly surprised to find that some drunken trash Rōnin has one in a similar quality.That is some f*cked up black magic, isn't it?

And yet, just as Hakuji said, something about this dude is off, maybe it is because he is only wearing a katana even though most people would also wear a wakizashi with it,but you don't have time to dwell on it. Not that you're in a rush, you just quite simply don't care.

"Well, that should do," You say, turning towards Hakuji and giving him a grin, "We are done."

"That was underwhelming," Hakuji frowns while you pat his cheek, "If I am going to be completely honest."

“Oh? I'm just glad that everything is going as planned!” You exclaim before pulling him away from the man. Okay, you hadn’t, but it sounds cooler when you say you planned it rather than it just being f*cking random.Who knows when he's gonna wake up, and you would love to not witness it.

"That’s because we had no plan.” He grumbles and you give him a curious look, "I mean, seriously, this whole thing was just luck."

You laugh, shaking your head as you pull him by his arm, "But you're right, this was kind of disappointing. This was the most effortless steal we ever did."

It was easy, maybe even a bit too easy. He lay there like a present but it is also not really your problem. Maybe for once the gods are smiling down on you?

A small reward for all the bullsh*t you had to put up with, which makes you frown, you deserve something better than just this though. Like, hm, for example, a comfortable life without having to worry about the canon events, or saving the life of some canon fodders? Preferable one where you can be lazy for a few years.

Bullsh*t,all the Japanese gods you’ve never paid attention to would never ever grant you such a gift without a catch and you know what, f*ck them all.

You think of such a thing as a fleeting thought and a passing fancy, but then you pick up some voices, people speaking loudly, so you know that it is time to either run or hide before someone recognizes you or anything else happens.

But running is no option, the voices are already just around the corner. With a drunken man behind you, no not drunk, knocked out forcefully, and Hakuji with two criminal tattoo's beside you who has the stolen sword in hand? This is probably the worst place you could ever find yourself being cornered.

There's no way you could sweet talk your way out of it.You would still fight them though, you're not a coward after all. It's a pity that you’re kind of infamous in Edo by now. If someone doesn't know you, they at least heard about you.

The little Hime of the Ōzora clan managed to change the rebellious demon child into a now hard-working angel.

You wanna vomit. They would die of shock if they knew that Hakujiwould totally help you bury these bodies, but it’s a job that you can do alone as well, you don't want him to get banned from Edo after all, and watching so much true crime has taught you a lot.

So hiding it is.

"Quick!" You say to Hakuji who looks back at you, his expression showing that he has absolutely no idea what is going on, "We need to hide!"

He doesn't even have the chance to respond you already grab his arm and begin to drag him, not that it takes much effort. The whole alley you shove him into is empty, save for some boxes and wood planks that are stored there. You pull him against the wall as you take advantage of his slight confusion.

It isn't enough to be completely concealed but it will do for now, as long as there's nobody with sharp senses. Then you cover his mouth with your free hand, trying to mask the sound of his breathing while you feel the tension building in your body.

The voices get louder, only two, but they seem to pass by, but still, you're not going to let your guard down until they are completely gone, after all, this alley is a very likely spot for people to hide.

You release your hold on Hakuji's mouth as you look at him, holding one finger put to your lips. His eyes are wide open in surprise before he closes them, his face is a little red. There's a frown adorning your face now, f*ck, did you almost suffocate him? You have to apologize later.

"Sorry," You whisper into his ear, but he doesn’t react, he's just staring at you, "Are you okay?"

If only you knew what kind of predicament Hakuji is in now because he would love to recoil and try to get away from your touch because you were close. Too damn close.

He looks at the face in front of him, feeling as if he is seeing you for the first time, no, that would be a lie. It is not seeing you for the first time, but seeing you as something more than just his friend.

It is the first time he wants to curse out his father because he planted the thought of marrying you into his mind. He never thought about you in such a manner before, never entertained the thought of you as such. Yet, there is a strange fluttering tickling at his ribcage for a while now before he shakes the feeling out, focusing on anything else but—

It feels nice, being so close to you, way too nice.

"Y-Yes, I'm fine."

He wants to slap himself. He shouldn't think about things like that. This is the worst situation to bethinking things like that.With a heart throbbing painfully in his chest, he blinks before he shakes his head, trying to get a grip on reality again

You nod your head but he can feel it, he can see that your face is flushed from all the tension and anxiety, your cheeks are slightly red, and so are your neck and even your ears, which is kind of cute.

That boy is now completely whipped. Great.While Hakuji is quite literally experimenting a simp awakening, you are too focused on the conversation betweenthe two people passing by.

"Is he dead? I hope he is, if not, I will kill him for sure this time," One says, sounding annoyed before they continue, "I swear, he is nothing but trouble- That idiot, how did he even survive the selection?"

"Maybe it was pure luck? Beats me, not like I care." The other one replies back with a sigh, "I mean, we could help him, but who am I to play God? Let's go already, I'm tired of this sh*t."

"Are you serious? We can't just leave him here, what if—"

"Why not? I know you’re a little behind the times, but that’s extreme even for you. He is useless now." The second guy answers in a tone, as if he just stated the obvious, "Look, what good is a swordsman without a sword?"

"I can't believe you. I take everything back, you're the idiot and an asshole."

"Yeah, yeah. I'm trying my best, thanks" A yawn, "You take the kid back to the weird 'flower or whatever it is called' house, and I'm gonna go after the demon."

"Why are you like that? This is not a thumbs-up situation."

Hakuji frowns, probably thinking that it is some sort of insult but you blink rapidly before your mind catches up and your brain registers everything. Your heart thunders in your chest while your eyes light up, and you hit a goddamn jackpot.

Like a mantra, it is ringing in your head as pure euphoria engulfs you wholly; ademon, demon, demon, demon, demon, demon, demon.

The wretched fool is a Demon Slayer and you have a Nichirin blade on your hands again! What the hell… is this a fever dream? Butoh my god, how long has it been?! Too damn long!

You really, really wanna get a look at the color of the blade, but then you would expose yourself for sure. So you're patiently waiting for them to get the f*ck away because you're getting impatient. They have gone quite some distance away already but you're not talking chances.

"I think they are finally gone," You say as you let go of him and take a look back at the street. It's empty now, "Come on, we should leave. If someone saw us then—"

Hakuji cuts you off by grabbing your shoulder with one hand and pulling you towards him. You blink, your brain not catching up with all the suddenness, but after a moment, you realize that he's looking at you with a troubled expression.You can’t help but immediately become flustered under his gaze. God only knows what he is thinking under this black hair of his.

The way his eyes look at you makes you feel as if you're suddenly in danger.

Your face grows a little red,he's so close to your face. He looks like he has something to say butstruggles to do so.The only thing that makes it a bit more obvious is the fact that he's having a hard time breathing as well. He looks like he's about to choke on whatever he's thinking about.

Ok, seriously, what the hell is going on?What is he so nervous about?

And yet, you still feel as if this isn't right, something is wrong here and it feels like your insides are twisting and turning around each other.

“[Name] what if, you know,”He mumbles before clearing his throat, trying to speak again.“I mean, god knows, you deserve a hell of a lot better but why don't we mar–”

He's cut off by aloud bang, making you both flinch, as the sky lights up in beautiful colors.

Fireworks, of course, you nearly forgot about the festival due to all the excitement.They are so bright and pretty, they are almost blinding.

"Wow, they really go all out here, huh?”You gasp, watching as the firework bursts in a variety of shapes and sizes, all different kinds that light up the night with their beauty.

You feel a small smile spread across your lips,feeling the warm feeling spreading through you like a fever. It feels like the last few days have been nothing but pure torture, just thinking about all the sh*t you had to put up with.

But now, finally, everything is starting to come together, or maybe it has always been like this.

A sigh leaves Hakuji as he grabs your hand, squeezing it for comfort, and then pulling you along as you leave the alley. His eyes are focused on the fireworks, "Let's go, maybe if we are quick enough we can actually go to the festival before it ends."

As much as you love Fireworks, you don't think you'll make it there in time. But it is worth a try, so you nod your head while holding onto his hand as he pulls you along.

“This is not how I thought tonight would go,”Hakuji says fondly, his icy-like eyes shining with what you can only describe as happiness.

“I know, isn’t it great?!”you giggle happily.

The festival was great and even more fun, but unfortunately, you're both already on your way back toward his humble home. It feels like you were away for hours, though you're not sure exactly how long you were. Maybe three, four, or five at most?

You feel the weight of the sword on your hip as you walk next to him, holding your hand in his. It is quite comfy walking like this, so natural and nice like the whole situation just came to be because fate wanted it. You know for a fact that it did not, that the events that lead you here weren't fate but pure luck.

Well, who cares? You ate so much yummy food, Yakisoba, Takoyaki, Okonomiyaki, heck, even Ikayaki, and all for free because, in the last few years, you helped them out in some form, even though you don't remember! Not that you complain, what idiot would decline free food?

Besides, you met a bunch of interesting people, whenever someone asked about the sword, you just told them some bullsh*t story. Something along the lines of "Oh we found it laying around, someone must have lost it. We want to give it to the magistrate after the festival." Which earned you some praise from the people. They are so gullible, it almost hurt.

And the best thing? Hakuji even gifted you more than just a beautiful hairpin! Well, he stole it while the stall owner was busy ogling you, but that doesn't matter.You're more proud of how skillfully he managed to do it, you felt so proud.

It's an exquisitely crafted floral kanzashi, it looks like a crystallized lotus and you almost snickered as he gave it to you. It's almost ironic that Hakuji would gift you something in the form of something that is in a way associated with his future pain-in-the-ass colleague Douma.

While you love the kanzashi dearly and you will wear it until you die, again, you can't help the slight shiver running down your spine. Was it a coincidence or some sort of obvious foreshadowing? If so, then wow, how unoriginal.

You try to push it away by thinking of something else but unfortunately, your mind is empty and it seems as if nothing will get rid of this ominous feeling in the pit of your stomach.

The sky above you is dark and the moon barely makes an effort to illuminate the path ahead, leaving only faint light from the few lanterns. Thanks to them you can make out the silhouettes of buildings up ahead. You don't really notice but, wasn't it awfully quiet?

Normally it would be at least bustling with a few people walking home, chatting and laughing at each other. Today though, it is dead silent; no voices, no footsteps on the dirt roads.

Your mind starts racing at this and you feel slightly alarmed as the lack of human sounds becomes more pronounced. There were no people around, no animals, and most importantly, there was absolutely no sign of life whatsoever.

Oh, right.

A demon was on the loose, you nearly forgot, well. If these idiots didn't manage to take it down, maybe you should later? Slowly trying to get back into the whole ordeal of slaying and searching for them?

You aren't scared that Soyama-san or your family could be in possible danger, especially considering your bad luck with such things, but you took measures that he didn't end up as some midnight snack. If you will ever get yeeted into the Taisho Era, you're gonna bow low and thank Gyomei for giving you the idea of burning wisteria incense.

As you turn to look at the man by your side, his icy-like gaze meets yours, and even through the darkness, you can clearly see that he's looking straight at you. You know this because he has the most peculiar expression on his face, one that you have seen a few times now.

He looks like he wants to say something, but he never does. Just when you start wondering if something happened between the two of you, the silence is finally broken as his voice echoes into the night.

"Did you have fun tonight?"

That single line makes you grin and shake your head in disbelief. Of course, you had fun, it was after all such a successful evening, you even forgot about all the awkwardness from the morning. That alone shows how amazing this night has been!

"I did!" you answer in excitement, feeling the smile stretch across your features. "What about you, did you have fun too?"

"Of course, it's always fun with you, well, not always, but usually." Hakuji looks at you expectantly. He seems to want you to say more and your curiosity gets the best of you, you really wanna hear what he wants to say. "But I am glad that you feel better now."

You look up at him and raise an eyebrow, you appreciate the sentiment, "Let's forget about it. Your father was just joking, don't take it too seriously."

"I know that, it just doesn't sit right with me," he says as he turns his gaze back onto the path ahead of you, walking along silently as he stares off into the distance. "But I think he does have a point."

Huh. Huh?What the f*ck?

A bead of sweat rolls down your forehead. You're not even sure what exactly he means, and weirdly enough, you would like very much not to find out, thank you.

Nevertheless, like the complete self-destructive clown that you are, you open your mouth, "What do you mean?"

Hakuji looks back at you, his eyes glowing slightly with an emotion you haven't seen since, since, doesn't matter, though there is also a slight hint of fear as well. The latter is only present for a split second before disappearing into the ether,"About what he said this morning."

There's a short silence until he opens his mouth again, gazing at you, giving you no room to breathe, "About you and me."

That look, that expression.

It reminds you of someone. He really looks like someone.

The sound of your own heart beating seems deafening, drowning out even your own thoughts. Your chest rises and falls rapidly, you can feel your body tense your legs refusing to move forward while your mouth feels like it is stuffed with cotton.

Your brain freezes, unable to comprehend the information in front of you, only the red of his cheeks.

Such lovely red.

Red, you despise this color with every fiber of your being, but at the same time, you adore it.You want to run back into the darkness and never come back out, it's like a siren, tempting and beautiful, and yet you cannot look away.

You opened your mouth and almost saidsomething. Almost. The rest ofyour life might have turned outdifferently if you had. But you didn't, because, because; you don't like it.

Those who have felt this emotion, change quickly, they crumble and everything breaks down after it. It's a foolish emotion that leaves nothing behind.

Yes, it leaves nothing behind–

"That is not what I meant. What I mean areyou and me. Not my brother.”

"Well, thenwe will stay together. Like always. It's not likeI am not going anywhere."

"Yes, we will, for as long as we can."

Yoriichi.

Oh, no.You don't detest red, you hate it for what it makes you feel, for what it stands for.

Your very first emotional attachment, your very first unspoken love. It is stopping you from moving on, you had made up your mind already months ago you can't stay here feeling this way.

With a glimmer of hope for a fool's fantasy, of loving and being loved, with the satisfaction of precious moments. With warmth, and a glimpse of happiness. They become an even bigger longing once you have got your taste of it, no matter what.

To you who is lonely, in agony every night, and a coward.

This would be just another cruel punishment, but, now it's time to end this.

"I am kind of tired, how about we talk about this another time?" Truly spoken like a weakling, "It was a long day, so I will head home before Tsukihiko organizes a search party."

You're sorry, you want to apologize, but you can't. What are you supposed to say? There is no simple explanation for your desperate attempt to change the topic, or more like completely running away from it. Why you can't simply agree with his suggestion that he hasn't spoken out loud?

Because it wouldn't be fair towards him, you would break his heart. You can't use him to fill that empty space in you.

Hakuji's smile wavers briefly before returning. He doesn't say anything else as you take your hand from his grip, until, "Alright, but shouldn't I bring you home though?"

"Don't worry. I see you tomorrow." You swallow with difficulty as an invisible rope tightens around your neck andbriefly turn around and start walking briskly down the road toward the house that's right behind you.

You keep a firm grip on the sword at your hip, it is a comfort, the only one you can possibly have right now, as you walk through the eerie quiet streets of Edo. The streets are mostly empty due to the fact that most people have headed home after the festivities, except for a few drunken people who probably will be heading home too after they sober up.

The silence of the night feels like a suffocating blanket over your head, you really feel the absence of all sound. But that isn't what makes you anxious; no, it is your own mind that's gnawing at you.

There's no way that Hakuji could have seriously developed any form of deep emotions for you, especially not something as grand as "love", he's a teenager, maybe it was just his weird hormones speaking? Or just a tiny harmless crush?

Or, maybe it was just compassion towards you? Trying to save you from a terrifying marriage, trying to repay you for everything you did for him and his family? Gosh, you should have heard him out instead of running away like a brat. The more you try to reason it out, the more your mind seems to twist into knots of anxiety, leaving you unable to concentrate on anything.

But that wouldn't explain the look in his eyes. No matter how ridiculous that idea sounds that Hakuji could truly feel these things for you, it doesn't change that something in you told you to run and run and run until you can't anymore.

How could you ever dare to think of being involved with him in that manner, or anyone for that matter? Your heart can barely handle such things, so how could you possibly think you would have a future when the past is still crawling up your skin?

It hurts, you're trying not to dwell on the past, but your mind drags you back. maybe part of you wasn’t even trying, to begin with.You are too mentally unwell for this.

Man, you really have to talk to him tomorrow, don't you? Even though you prefer to skin yourself and jump into boiling water, you don't want to ruin the bond you have with him. Just remember, it was only pity, compassion, or whatever. No big deal, you've survived worse.

Wait, you didn’t.

Wonderful, you remember what a loser you were, you had one job, [Name], one f*cking job. One simple thing! And it ended in utter failure.

You're not sure if you should feel more guilty about being a complete failure or simply the fact that you're so pathetic and incompetent at life, or maybe you're a bit too harsh about yourself. At the least you can say you tried, right? And again, spoken like a true loser.

Maybe you should be a hermit in the mountains for a while.

You turn around, realizing you have no idea where you were going. The houses here are pretty small, there aren't even any gardens and they are quite close together, so the whole place feels claustrophobic.

You decide to walk a little more, plus ultra, and go even further right, but as you turn another corner, the sickening smell of blood hits your nose.

A wave of nausea rolls up into your throat,there's a sound, one you are sure you would never ever forget no matter how often you will die.

The sound of fleshtearing apart, bones cracking,and something being devoured–It all brings you back to that one night, to your first gruesome death in this world.

Oh, sh*t, no, stop it, it's just a memory. But the image, oh how vivid it still is, of course, it is, only five maybe six years have passed since. For you at least.

But you feel your skin prickle and goosebumps rise on your arms,as you make your way toward the sound. You take your newly acquired sword out of its sheath, turning it around as you study the blade from all possible angles, making sure there are no flaws or imperfections that will affectyour fighting ability in any way.

It is a dark shade of blue. As if itcouldn't decide between black or the characteristic blue of a Water Breath user.

Figures, it is the easiest to learn after all.

However, it irksyouthat this fool of a slayer did not take care of his sword properly,yes after all it was a good idea that you stole it. Now it is in better hands.It doesn't help your nerves much though.

Your eyes adjust to the dimness, and your eyes scan across the street looking for anyone who might be watching. No one seems to be. The houses on either side are mostly empty, the streets are deserted with not even a dog barking, or a cat meowing, only that disgusting sound.

A figure crouches down into the darkness within, hunched over,with another person laying beneath itand holding an arm up toward you, as if begging foranyaid.Or could that person truly

"Please, please–! I'm sorry!" A voice that sounds like it was made from the deepest pit of hell, “I won't do it again, I swear but please stop!”

Man, you really weren't in the mood to see someone getting eaten alive this night. And yet, when you look closer down upon it, you cannot help but almost let out a gasp of utter confusion at the scene.

The one underneath the body, the one who's getting snacked on, it's a man, nothing shocking about it, other than his slit pupils, sharp fangs, and long fingernails. Looking like a wimp, ademon, definitely a demon.

So, it's cannibalism? Even though there are plenty of humans around? You heard of it, but it was too rare.You step forward cautiously, reading your sword to first behead the one who's eating and then finish off the one who's begging and praying to every single holy deity out there.

Sucks to be him because the gods don't care.

But then, before you can even take a breath and move in for the kill, the onewhohasbeen having a midnight snack suddenly turns towards you and you stop dead in your tracks.

Your breath is taken away by the sight of the man, he has pale skin, and amuscular build along with broad shoulders, even as he sits you can already tell that he would tower over you and has short, straightpale blond hairstyled in an unruly undercut.There’s no way it’s natural but at the same time, it has to be, you're in the middle of the Edo Era.

He wears a traditional dark purple kimono with velvet-colored trim that is only loosely tied byablack and gold belt, giving you a complete view of his muscular legs, you almost didn't notice his sword. He also wears a black sleeveless shirt that has a high black collar with golden accents, overall the accessories he wears look expensive.

Thanks to the kimono that is almost completely sliding down his shoulders and arms, you try your best to ignore the leg in his hand, and you can see that he must have some tattoos on his back and arms. And well, on his feet were traditional sandals with white socks, but that doesn't really matter.

You can't see his eyes at all because he wears a blindfold or bandana, you don't know, decorated with a patterned streak that covers them, making it impossible for you to know for sure if he was staring at you, engaging with you in an epic staring contest or at the demon beneath you who's throwing a tantrum.

He looks like a slu*t, a pain in the ass, a manwhor*, and you don't have to talk to him to know that he's an arrogant bastard, and with the way he smiles at you, fangs showing, he's a potential babygirl, and you hate it because, ugh, every fiber in you tries to deny it, butUGH–

Your blood test just came in, it's hopeless, oh no, you're hopeless. It's slu*t positive and you can't even see his eyes but goddamn it, you know he's gorgeous as hell. But it makes you wonder, this is after all a world of fiction, in no way there be someone running around looking like that if they weren't important.

Nonetheless, you have to give yourself some credit; you don’t look fazed in the slightest, only the slight arch of your eyebrow, even though internally your screaming bloody murder.And when he finally speaks after a moment of silence, you recognize the voice, he's extra number two who wanted to go after the demon after calling the passed-out clown essentially a shame to humankind.

“Oh, you're the one that stole that idiot's sword.” He almost sounds amused.

"No sh*t, what gave me away?" You have no time to be polite, too busy to remember if he was important or not, it is on the tip of your tongue. "Me waving it in front of your eyes?"

"It helps, but I saw you being cozy with the kid in the alley." He says, doing a dismissive hand gesture, with the leg, great, "I'm more interested in why, obviously you know of the existence of demons, you're using the Constant Breathing technique, the one only advanced Demon Slayers can constantly maintain, but you have the need to steal a Nichirin sword. So why?"

You are gonna ignore the fact that he called Hakuji a kid because what a lie, Hakuji doesn't look like a child anymore, the man doesn't even look as if he's much older. f*ck, this reminds you of what happened earlier this night, ugh, you wanna refuse to even entertain the thought of your cowardice.

Though now you have to give him credit, because what the hell, he's wearing a blindfold how can he see something as tiny as your breathing with it? Either he has actually quite sharp senses or he is the Demon Slayer version of Gojo.

Please no, you can barely handle yourself, you would not be able to be someone who's also a little sh*t.

"Hey! Are you both f*cking nuts? How can you have a normal conversation while one of you is eating me?" Oh, you almost forgot about the demon, "Just let me go already!"

"Be quiet, the adults are talking." is the only answer the demon gets from his torturer, even going as far as looking like a disappointed parent.

"Adults??? I'm older than both of you combined! You would be lucky to get as old as me!"

"I sure as hell hope I'm not getting as old as some crusty-ass demon who's a wimp," you whisper to yourself. You’re heard, though, as the demon throws some insult in your direction and the swordsman is snickering at your comment, "Seriously, does he taste better than he looks?"

"I wouldn't recommend it," He shrugs as if you were having the most normal conversation in the world while dropping the leg as he stands up, one foot firmly on the back of the demon, "Thanks for the meal, but I'm done, so I'm gonna kill you now, alright?"

You don't even bother watching the spectacle, you, for once, are gonna use your brain, as the unknown man is finishing his mission. As he unsheathes his sword, you catch sight of his red-colored blade, it's not the same as Yoriichi's but of the Flame users. So Flame Breathing and Demonic Transformation? That much you can say with certainty.

Interesting, but doesn't help you that much.Demonic Transformation is intriguing enough though, in the Sengoku Era there wasn't a single one you encountered, the only one you know of is Genya but he couldn't use a Breathing Technique.

Ugh. Think, [Name], think with your peasant's brain, and use your ultimate fan knowledge for once.

"So, what's your deal?" Huh? "I know you aren't an official corps member, but you can use the Breathing, by the way, which Technique do you use?"

Oh, he's done. Nice, you sent a quick prayer for the demon, wishing that his dumbass doesn't get involved with Muzan in the next life before you turn your attention back to the man who holy sh*t, is f*cking tall. Curse your tiny body, he can easily spit on your head if he wants to! Unfair.

"Moon Breathing." A simple answer, because this feels like a job interview, and you suck at these and will even if you live another hundred years, so you try to divert the topic away from you, "And you're eating demons? You should be careful, if you consume too many, it's not gonna be a nice ending."

"Oh? Are you worried about a complete stranger?" He dares to grin down at you, asshole.

"f*ck off, if you wanna end up like the whiny bitch you just killed be my guest."

"Don't worry, the only thing that could kill me for real is if someone would slice me in half and there hasn't been a single demon that could. Besides I've been consuming them for quite a long time by now, and nothing happened other than the advantage of having some sort of demonic power while staying human." He sounds so sure of himself, you wish you had that confidence.

You wanna roll your eyes but his statement rings a bell, it sounds so familiar, but where. Where the hell did you hear that? Or read it? You keep staring at the man, gosh, you don't even know his name. Sliced in half, demonic transformation–

"Hey, I know I'm handsome but if you keep staring at me like that even I get flustered–" You don't hear the rest of his shameless babble.

"Yeah, yeah, super handsome, you're right." You mumble a halfhearted answer, too damn busy at the moment.

It was then that the world around you began to spin, his words ringing in your head. Sliced in half, demonic transformation, until you finally remembered–

"You aren't dead yet, even though your torso has been sliced in half. Around three hundred years ago there was a swordsman who ate demons just like you. He died when I sliced his body, so perhaps for you, it's head?"

f*ckf*ckf*ckf*ckf*ckf*ck, SWEET BABY JESUS,COULD IT BE?

Your eyes widen, maybe, perhaps, what if, it's him?He could be the swordsman Kokushibou told Genya about while looking down on him as if he was some co*ckroach. It isn't 300 years ago, but the Michikatsu you know wouldn't bother to remember something as trivial as an exact year.

Do you have for once something that people call EX Luck? You wanna kiss his stupid gorgeous face because the possibility is high that it is him! He got only mentioned for that single sentence, no appearance or name, nothing, but there's one thing you have learned since you have woken up in this world. The higher-ups like to toy with you, and your poor souls and this wild ride of a night can't be a coincidence.

"Hey, what's your name?" You can't contain your excitement, practically beaming at him, you wanna know the name of the man that could be your golden ticket to finding Michikatsu, "I'm Ōzora[Name]."

He must be so confused by your sudden change in demeanor but you don't care, and he finally smiles, "It's Akio, nice to meet you,[Name]-chan."

"The pleasure is all mine." You grin at him.

Oh Akio, if only he knew that you will do everything in your power to not let him vanish out of your life now. He's doomed to a friendship with you.

Chapter 9: ACT II • Yūgen IV

Chapter Text

“Well, what do you think?” you ask, bouncing on your feet.

“He’s nice, my father likes him.” comes the dry answer from Hakuji, his only reaction is to rub the back of his neck as he watches how your new 'friend' Akio is having a conversation with Soyama-san.

You don't hear about what they are talking about, and you don't care as long as Hakuji's father isn't in any form uncomfortable. But he has a soft expression as he listens to probably some bullsh*t story from Akio, intensely listening. So you turn your attention back to Hakuji, “Figures, what about you?”

“I hate him with every fiber of my being, something about him makes me want to punch him.” He points his thumb toward the man in question, who laughs happily at whatever Soyama-san just told him, "Can I? Maybe I feel better after that."

You giggle with absolute joy at how brutally honest he is, “Why am I not surprised, is it because he's blond?”

"What?"

In your mind, it doesn't sound so far stretched, maybe it's deep-rooted in his very core that Hakuji has an instant dislike towards blond people who are annoying, Douma is blond and annoying, and so is Akio.

Well, not in your case, weirdly enough Akio and you get along pretty well, maybe because you both don't question each other when the other says something dubious or weird.If anything, the more you think about it, the less sense it makes to you why he would like Akio. A mysterious man suddenly shows up with you which is already dubious as hell.

Thanks to the odd jobs, you may have many acquaintances, but never once did you bring anyone here, let alone introduce them as your friend, let alone introduce them as your friend.

"Say, how did you meet him again?"

Funny story, after our weird conversation, I got lost and I saw him snacking a demon, yes they are real, I thought wow that's kinda sick and cool at the same time, then I realized that he was my most important chance at finding my former fiance from my previous life who by now is a demon with six eyes and weird looking sword, and so I thought: I'm gonna follow him for the rest of my life.

"How many times do you want to ask me? After the festival, I got lost and he helped me to find my way back home. We talked and that's it." Your explanation sounds too simple and boring, but it's the truth, just only half of the whole story.

Your sense of direction was actually sh*t when it's an unfamiliar area, and Akio found you at least as interesting as you him, so he helped you get home, and that's when you got some intriguing pieces of information.

Currently, there are no female corps members, well at least no slayer or hashira according to Akio's knowledge. He could be wrong but he only knows of some female Kakushi, and probably a few medics. Which is a shame, because you would love to meet another woman that slays demons finally.

But what's even more disappointing than the lack of some women being absolutely badass is that you're the first one he's ever met who actually uses the Breath of the Moon, nobody learned or mastered it.

These dumb peasants couldn't learn it even after you wrote down the most detailed explanation ever witnessed by mankind. It's disheartening to know that you wasted so much time writing it down when you could have spent that time eating mochi or annoying someone to death.

Hakuji looks over at Akio again before glancing back at you, "So, why is he with you almost every day now?"

It is a fair question but it's hard for you to think of a convincing answer that doesn't involve him being in your home all the damn time and sleeping under the same roof as you, since he somehow managed to win the heart of your loving mother and even of the damn fool Tsukihiko.

Well, your mother was just thankful to Akio for bringing you safely home, and after hearing that he has nowhere to stay because he's just passing through she insisted that he stays with you until he has to go again. And Tsukihiko? He just probably preferred Akio over Hakuji, to be honest. Plus, Akio looks like he was from a higher status, so who knows what his gremlin mind is planning again.

But if Hakuji knew all of this, he'd probably get an aneurysm from stress, "Maybe because he isn't from here? But look, your father was probably sick of seeing only our faces every day, and Akio seems pretty entertaining, I haven't heard him laugh that often for a few months now. I'm just glad he's enjoying himself."

Hakuji's father is always in good spirits, but Akio seems to bring him a whole new level of happiness.

"I can't believe you are trying to make me feel better about this," he snorts as he pokes your cheek, "Do you even know anything about him?"

Actually, no. You barely know anything about him, except the basics, okay, you know what he looks like, though it would be hard not to,he's basically radiatingconfidence in waves, and you instantly know that you could never compare to him.

But that's beside the point and so Hakuji does have a fair point of being on guard around him. But you aren't exactly worried about Akio hurting you, so you give him a bright smile, "Don't worry, if he does anything dumb, I can stab him."

"You know, not every problem can be solved with a sword." Comes his calm answer, slowly but surely regretting that he has ever helped you get one in the first place.

You nod, he does have a point, "Right, maybe I need a second one in case the first one breaks. It would be nice to have a spare."

With how Hakuji only sighs at your answer, you're sure that right now, in this exact moment, he's questioning every single choice he had made in his life that he has the displeasure of ending up here. Well, welcome to the club, you do that almost daily. He will get used to it.

"No seriously [Name], what do you know about him? Do you even know if he has a surname or how old he is?" This sounds like scolding, doesn't it? The audacity to scold you about your unsafe behavior and care about your well-being!

Something delighted bubbles beneath your skin, almost beaming fondly before you’re able to crush it once again. f*cking hell, stop being so quickly affected by sweet gestures, it's embarrassing, "I don't know, I never asked, but he's obviously older than me. Why do you know old he is?"

Hakuji just rolls his eyes at you, "He's two years older than us, that's all I know."

What?

"How do you know that?" You peer at him from the corner of your eye as you try to figure out how the f*ck that manwhor* can be that young. Are you that bad at guessing the age of someone? Apparently so but you can not stress it enough, because how?!

In what universe is it possible to be that big and be not even an adult? Oh, wait, Genya is also super tall even though he is young. Is it because they are eating demons? Maybe you should start taking a bite or two in the future.

"Because I asked." He taps your forehead as if it was the most obvious thing in the world.

"Oh." Makes sense, yeah, of course, it's that easy, huh?

Unlike you, Hakuji is actually able to ask freely. You on the hand? If you don't care about someone, you don't bother, but if you want to befriend someone for real? A mess, internally you have to survive ten meltdowns until you can even hold a simple conversation.Well, so befriending a canon character is a lot easier because, in a weird and bizarre way, you know them.

Akio? You know nothing about him.Absolutely nothing.Andno matter time, no matter the universe,you are a walking disaster.

You have the tendencyto over-analyze situations because you're scared of what will happen if you are not prepared for them. Your biggest archenemy isn't Muzan who had the pleasure to finish off your miserable life, oh no, it's the damn butterfly effect that scares you sh*tless, or for that matter, not to be able to change anything at all.

Wow, in this life you are doomed, you definitely are.Couldn't you got merely be thrown into the Taisho Era? Actually, that would have been too easy, what did you get instead? Difficulty level: Sucks to be you, loser.

You have to fight back the groan as you turned your gaze back toward Akio, who currently tries to balance his sword on the tip of his finger. It's quite a sight, the way he moves so gracefully, and how he balances so easily as if he were born with a sword in his hand.

Well, that is until he loses balance and bonks himself on the head with the sword, hearing him curse under his breath.

No wonder he died at the hands of Michikatsu, or should you call him now Kokushibou, well to be fair, you almost suspect that nobody ever lived to tell the tale of encountering him.

Despite it all, you can only agree with Muichiro, Kokushibou is majestic as f*ck, doesn't matter as human or as a demon.Even you did quiver from time to time in his presence, because wow, how could you have not?

And it doesn't help that you can clearly imagine that Akio probably said something stupid while encountering him, and oh god, you know how intimidating Michikatsu can be when he's not amused about your idiocy, you were after all the main victim of his intense gaze and very much disappointed gaze.

"I'm f*cked," you murmur to yourself, feeling not so confident anymore.Ah, damn, now you miss him, you almost forgot why you were even mad at him in the first place.Somebody should give you some sort of prize for dealing with this.

But hey, at least you have Hakuji who is patting your head tenderly as if he has any clue why you're suddenly radiating despair throughout your every being. You're not even sure why you feel like this, but then again, you didn't expect you'd be able to have the opportunity to actually meet Michikatsu in this life.

You were so busy preparing forthe inevitableand being the main cause of your own misery that you never expected that there would be a chanceto make peace with the past, maybe even move on.

Now you are starting to have second thoughts.

But then, you won't really have anything to sayto himexcept for asking him why he killed everyone you ever cared about— what if he really did? Oh God, if everything did go the same way as in canon what did he do to Yoriichi's corpse?Did he just— did he just let his body lay there until who knows when someone found him? Did he eat him? No, knowing him he probably kicked him, picked up the flute, and never looked back.

You shake your head at yourself as you try to stop your imagination from running wild, just at the moment to witness Soyama-san having a bad coughing fit. He coughs up blood before either of you has a chance to do anything, but when everyone starts to panic he holds out his hand.

"Calm down everyone, I am fine," he says, sounding far too composed despite the fact that he's hacking up blood from his mouth, "It is nothing. It'll heal in time."

That's the biggest lie you have ever heard in the last few months. Soyama-san is lying right to your face for the first time since you have known him, and yet there's nothing you can do except to bring him something to drink for his soar throat as Hakuji brings him a cloth. All the while Akio is patting his back, enormously gazing at him as if he can see anything clear through his blindfold.

"He's fine, he just needs some rest," you murmur in a low voice as you turn to Akio, "We probably should get going."

"Yeah, it's for the best." Hakuji nods once in agreement before he places the soiled cloth on the ground beside him before he stands up with Akio and you, "I will see you out."

This would go on for weeks, almost a routine at this point, with Akio and you leaving the moment Soyama was feeling even more unwell. It's the unspoken truth that his time was quickly running out, and you three could do nothing but watch and make it as comfortable as possible for the man that you saw as the first father figure in your life.

You accepted this, hell, you knew that at some point this would happen.

This doesn't change the fact that it hurts, but even more so for Hakuji. Heplessly seeing his father slowly withering away, unable to help, you have been there yourself, so you are quite familiar with the feeling except it was yourself who wilted away instead of someone dear to you.

"At least he's prepared, you know?" Akio is the one saying those words over, and over again as you all take turns tending to him. You do not have the heart to argue.

The last thing you want to do is be an annoyance to him as he tries his best to be supportive as he can be as someone who didn't know him that long."And he can be with his loved ones until it happens. I think he's a fortunate man for that. Not many have that privilege."

You agree wholeheartedly. At least, you are hoping so because Akio has a point about how he has the opportunity to say his goodbyes and that also Hakuji has this chance. One he didn't have in the original story, he got banned from Edo, with his father blaming himself for everything and hanging himself.

A tragedy and yet, it is such a twisted thing to feel actually grateful that it did not end that way, but if that is so, then why does it hurt so much? You know, you really should be pleased about his survival until now, right?

But here you sit, yet another day of this routine, watching how Hakuji and Akio train outside while you care for Soyama-san who can't even sit up anymore, but his head is turned to watch them too. His gentle eyes seemed to be filled with so much fondness a human can possibly conjure.

When Hakuji started to become restless and uneasy when he didn't know where to put his bottled-up feelings, Akio and you dragged him outside, trying to distract him and get him engaged in something where he can let it out, and that was with Hakuji trying to either beat the sh*t out of Akio and spare with you.

It's only a few hours a day, but it's better than nothing.

And you? How do you cope with these feelings? How do you deal with this? In the only way that you know of, in the middle of the night, slaying any demon that you can lure in with your blood.

It's unhealthy, the bloody bandages are slowly piling up.Ultimately, it's better than laying awake, getting consumed by your thoughts, and doing nothing. Besides, for every demon that you slay, you eventually save various lives that you don't know of.That counts for something, doesn't it?

Killing demons isn't a bad habit to have when you're feeling a little off balance. The moment you feel your life coming undone and everything goes to hell, you just go out, away from prying eyes. It doesn't take long for one to show up after you let a few drops of your blood fall to the ground.

Well, if it wasn't for the worried gaze of Hakuji the next day when he catches a glimpse of your bandaged arm. Akio not so much, he is sometimes present when you go out, so he just quickly distracts Hakuji the moment he wants to ask.

You're not ready to have such a conversation with him or tell him about demons. Or anything else for that matter. Despite everything, there's still something you both haven't talked about. His almost proposal.

"I'm glad," Soyama-san says in between small coughs. You look at him, seeing the small smile on his lips, "That Hakuji will not be alone when I'm gone. To know that he has you two at his side means a lot to me."

Your throat tightens as the words leave his mouth. Your fingers tremble as you wipe up the sweat from his brows. You try your hardest not to let show any of your emotions for fear that he might see how you are already grieving for him.

But maybe he has already noticed it and is waiting for the right time to talk about it, but for now, he just wants to keep living out his days peacefully and enjoy the company of his son.

"Don't worry, I don't think he would get rid of us even if he tried to," you say as you try to reassure him, but it was a lie. You're a goddamn liar, you made up your mind long ago.

"I know," he replies softly before taking a sip from his cup of water which you had brought him, "I can't imagine a future where you two are not together, since you’ve both known each other you have been inseparable."

Oh god, please stop.

That is such a painful thing to say, you think as you bite down on your lower lip to keep your emotions in check, but he continues as if nothing happened, "The only reason why I am so afraid of death is that I cannot see you two growing up into adults. That I will miss seeing all the beautiful things you both will experience in life."

You swallow hard. You can feel your eyes moistening as his words echo in your ears. You hate it when he speaks like this because it always makes it difficult to remain silent, "Soyama-san, you make it sound like a goodbye. Don't—"

"I know," he interrupts you with a smile before he takes another sip of his water, "I know."

His voice is so calm and peaceful despite the fact that he has been so sick lately, so frail, yet he looks so content now as he drinks the cool water in a single gulp. It's strange how he's not letting himself be swallowed by this disease, even if it is eating him up from the inside out, he's not giving up that easily.

"It's not that, I'm just..." you start to stammer as tears begin to sting your eyes, "I wish it would have been that way, I really do, with you seeing all these things."

He smiles gently at you and then he takes your hand into his own, his skin is cold, and for a moment he stays quiet, as though trying to find the right words to say.

"There is no need to be sad," he says before he gives your hand a squeeze, "I am at peace. I have been at peace all along, just as I said, there is nothing to be feared about death for me."

He smiles gently at you and then he takes your hand into his own, his skin is cold, and for a moment he stays quiet, as though trying to find the right words to say.

"There is no need to be sad," he says before he gives your hand a squeeze, "I am at peace. I have been at peace all along, just as I said, and I am happy, that I have raised my child well, that I have been able to be blessed with so many wonderful people around me."

Your heart feels like it could break from how much love and warmth is emanating from him right now.

So you turn your gaze towards the men outside, seeing as Hakuji actually managed to punch Akio in the face, a goal he had since he had met him.

“Hakuji really turned great, didn't he? When I first met him, he was so awkward and rude,” you smile fondly, Hakuji grinning at Akio proudly while the other is shouting something about “that it doesn't count”andyoucan't help but chuckle.

"He certainly has changed. He's not just good-hearted, but he is also intelligentand strong-willed." Soyama-san says quietly as he looks overat his son,catchingthe scene from afar asHakuji continues his boasting, "He told me what happened [Name]-chan.”

You frown, unsure ofwhat exactly he meansbythat,but you have an idea, still, you ask, "What do you mean?"

Soyama-san's voice softens as he turns back to look at you, "How he almost proposed to you.”

Your eyes widen, and you feel the blood drain from your entire body as you try your best to stay silent so that he doesn't see how shaken up you are over the thought of this, "He mentioned this?"

"Yes."

“Oh, God,” youmutter, very much embarrassed by the sudden words. You blush furiously, burying your faceintoyourhands.

He chuckles softly before he looks back outside, "I am not surprised in the leastand I certainly wouldn't mind having you as my daughter-in-law.I could not even imagine anyone else but you."

“Well, uh, I mean, I guess so, yes." Your voice sounds shaky and weak even to you but that's the best you can manage right now, a choked-up laugh leaves you as you ask him, “Soyama-san, are you trying to ask me to marry your son?”

"It depends on your answer.“ Your eyes widen, your face completely engulfed in a furious blush, and he laughs at that, "I am just joking, don't worry. I know you have your own life to live, with your own future to choose from. And I would never push you into something if you didn't want it yourself, but don't be surprised when he will ask you again. I know my son after all.”

And that, to be honest, scares you endlessly, because it would imply that Hakuji, your pure partner in crime does not only has a short fleeting crush on you but something more profound. Something permanent, or at least long-standing — something so intimate and personal.

Romantic love is something complicated, for you at least. It's too much trouble. Too difficult.

It wasn't difficult to love Yoriichi, it was easy, you still wonder when exactly the line between friendship and romance blurred for you. You're certain there was no great epiphany, nothing like a moment of sudden clarity. It simply happened, and you had the courage to accept this undeniable fact.

And it is an undeniable truth that Hakuji would also be someone so easy to love. He's kind and considerate, and he makes you laugh so easily, and you like that about him. You love that sometimes when you're with Hakuji you simply forget that this chapter may have a tragic ending.

You think you're happy, and you are. You think you're lucky, and you are. You think you're in love, and maybe in a twisted way, you are. And then you think, and think, and think again and you're not.Part of you wants to hope and try again as if you have never been hurt before. But the other part of you wants nothing to do with love ever again, especially if it’s not meant to last.

And what Hakuji wants from you is beyond what you can give him at the moment, maybe someday, but not now. Not when you still have to cut down the ties that bind you to a certain past. Maybe you could make him happy if you were willing to leave everything behind.

But you aren't willing. You'll never be. Even though you've already left so many things behind.And yet, you will tell Soyama-san that one thing you have wholeheartedly accepted already—

“I think I'd like that, I mean, I'd be happy to have someone as him as my husband." You assure him in a whisper and he gives your hand a gentle squeeze as you can hear Akio snickering at you, making the whole situation even worse.

You shrink into yourself, trying to become smaller and smaller, the mortification making your cheeks even more flustered. You shake your head, hair swinging back and forward as you try to get rid of the embarrassment.

Of course, that stupid idiot heard the whole conversation with his demon-blood-infused ears, but unbeknownst to you because let's be real, you are far too unbothered about your surroundings to even notice that he wasn't laughing at you but at an equally embarrassed and blushing Hakuji.

You aren't surprised to find Hakuji standing at your door in the middle of the night, you will not even question how he got in and it isn't surprising when he wordlessly throws his arm around you in a bone-crushing hug. Stumbling through the room, you both fall on top of your futon, but this pain is nothing.

He doesn't let go, just laying on top of you and he doesn't need to say anything. There are so many emotions emanating from him, and you just know what happened.

With trembling lips, you grasp his kimono and squeeze him as tightly as you can. Your heart beats loudly in your ribcage, and then it breaks. You try to speak but your voice fails you; the tears come suddenly, unbidden, streaming down your cheeks. It feels worse than being stabbed.

"I'm sorry," you say into his shoulder, "So very sorry."

You don't know what else you're supposed to say, there's nothing you could ever say to make this better. The tears continue to flow; they are salty now with sorrow, and yet they cannot cleanse your soul of all its pain.

And you're not the only one hurting, your pain is nothing against his sorrow. He lost his father tonight, and his world will never be quite right again.

There are sobs racking his body, and your heart aches for him. He has always been there for you, even if he never would realize it but if it wasn't for Hakuji, you might have gone mad. But now he is grieving, and he needs you more than ever. You feel helpless because everything you can do is inadequate, and yet at the same time, you know that nothing else matters in comparison to helping him through this loss.

It hurts, so much, to see him suffer. To see all his life crushed to dust by such a loss. All these years you've looked upon Hakuji's face, and he seemed strong and sure, but now — now his strength gone with the wind. Now he is nothing but a broken man weeping for someone who was the world to him.

And still, he holds you like an anchor, keeping you safe in the midst of all this turmoil. His tears soak your hair, his breath hot against your ear and neck. But he won't say anything, and you wouldn't expect him to. Not now. He just clings to you, clinging to his own pain instead.

But you're no help either, you can only hold him and cry. And so you remain in silence while he weeps, and perhaps you both believe that somehow it will make things better. Perhaps you both believe that by doing nothing, by not speaking, the sorrow will pass like a dream.

Of course, it doesn't.

The grief did not pass the next morning, it was stronger than ever.You woke up with a headache and a sense that the whole world had gone black. You felt hollow, empty. It was a feeling you knew all too well. It was like death, only it was a thousand times worse, far more real than the phantom sensation that haunted your nights.

Hakuji didn't say anything either. He sat quietly on your bed while you got ready. There's no time for shyness or anything else, no time to be surprised or chuck something against Akio's head who storms into your room without announcing himself.

One look was enough for him to read the atmosphere, and another one to understand what happened. Akio doesn't ask any other questions, not now. Instead, he makes his way over to the grieving boy, tousling his dark hair roughly, and it almost makes you smile. He truly does not know how to comfort someone.

Though there's no twitch in your expression, nothing. Just a sigh that leaves your lips. Because you know what is coming, and you know that it's gonna be tough for everyone present.

The rest of the day drags horribly slowly, the way toward the slums was silent, and everything was silent as you see the man you have considered a father figure on his futon, so pale and peaceful, with a smile on his face. He died peacefully in his sleep, but you know he was in so much pain.

You don't know what to say, what to do, there's really nothing you can do to make this better. It isn't your place. But you have to, and so, with all the resolve in your heart, you turn to them and mutter, "We have to bury him."

Hakuji is looking at you, and your eyes meet his in a long gaze of understanding. This is the first time since yesterday that there's some sort of emotion, and although it isn't happiness or joy or any such thing, just some sort of peace, there's relief and gratitude in seeing him again.

Akio stands beside him, he is silent as well, and perhaps the two of them realize that they share the same feelings. That neither can say a single word to ease this pain.

So it takes a few hours for you to dig out the grave. Hakuji carries the corpse, while Akio and you dig the grave. It is a hard and laborious process, the sun beats down mercilessly, sweat drips into your eyes and you feel your hands becoming numb. And yet you continue until finally after a grueling day spent laboring under the heat of the sun, you have a hole in the ground big enough for him.

And then you lower the body into the earth, and it was time for the final goodbye.

You can feel Hakuji tremble beneath you as if he's about to break apart. You wrap your arms around him and hold him tight. He buries his face against your neck and you cling to each other, unable to bear the weight of all this emotion.

Akio has to drag the two of you back towards the house after the sun started to set, but this time there was no argument. Just silence. The three of you walk in solemn procession, and your feet are lead, your limbs heavy; all you can do is stare down at the path ahead and keep moving forward.

You don't want to think, you don't want to do anything.

But you're quite thankful for the blond, the first few days he has been awful and he was so patient with Hakuji and you. He cooked, and forced you two to eat, and forced you to do anything. Even if it was only to swing your sword around and nothing more, it was better than mopping around.

Akio even managed to get Tsukihiko off your back, you don't know how and you don't want to, but that was only for a short time. When you finally could function like a normal human being, you started to take care of Hakuji, and that sadly meant that your brother was back to crawling up your ass.

And after two months, you finally snapped.

“I don't want to take over the role of the heartless bitch in this group, and Hakuji, I love you, please don't kill me, but it's been almost two months,” you carefully try to bring up, standing the in the middle of the room as if this was some sort of war council, “It's time to kiss this place goodbye for good and go on an adventure.”

The silence that follows your statement is so thick and heavy it could be cut with a knife. Well, it's only uncomfortable for you since you can't currently read Hakuji’s expression at all, maybe because you can't even see his face in the first place.

Currently, he's lying face down on the futon, not even raising his head to acknowledge your statement, not even a grunt, nothing.Well, at least he's still breathing. You hope. And his ears are red from your bold declaration of your affection. So everything is good and you're not gonna bother.

Akio, on the other hand, is grinning lazily at the mention of finally leaving this place behind, it's a miracle that he has been even staying for so long and not leaving you behind because it got too boring. Well, to be fair, he was mostly simply amused by whatever was happening.

“Oh? Where does this enlightenment come from, little Hime?“

Akio asks curiously after a brief pause, a stupid grin adoring his face and suddenly you have the urge to wipe it off his face with your fist.He's always cheerful and energetic, he is definitely an asshole, the one who does whatever he wants whenever he wants and doesn’t care about the collateral damage. But somehow, he seems different right now than usual.

Maybe there's the tiniest chance that deep down he acknowledges the fact that this isn't just one of your daily meetings to discuss the life-changing topic of what you all gonna eat today.

“You know where it comes from already, Akio-chan, don't bother pretending otherwise," you inform him spitefully, now is truly not the time to f*ck around, right now, you have more important things to do, "Time is running out, well, for me at least, and that means I gotta do what I can do best: to skedaddle the f*ck out of here before sh*t goes down for real and that would preferably be with you two."

Your gaze drops to Hakuji, who is now hastily rising from his position, almost throwing himself at you in the process. How did he do that without looking like an idiot? You don't know, you could never— the peaks of being a pretty boy, you guess.

"What do you mean by that? Did something happen?" Hakuji's questioning is so sudden and so severe, you feel a wave of dread sweep over you when he asks, reaching over to feel your forehead as if to check for a fever, "Are you sick?"

You're so confused as he inspects your face, searching for any sign of sudden illness. Where the hell—Oh!

You should have phrased that better, you idiot, with how you basically declared it, and with his father now gone, it sounds alarming, doesn't it?

"What, no, I'm not sick don't worry." You're quick to tug his hand away from your face, holding it instead. Stupid heart, swooning at his protective behavior towards you, how dare he be this precious.

Akio follows the interaction, looking at the raven-haired boy with exasperation, and before a grin can form on his lips, you silence him with your best don't-you-even-dareexpression. It doesn't work, he's laughing now."Did you forget Hakuji? Idiots don't get sick."

"Who are you calling dumb?" That statement is promptly followed by a pillow mercilessly thrown at his face, and wow, how did Hakuji do that so quickly and so precisely with only one hand?

Oh, why is he now reaching for that innocent tea kettle? Not that it would make any lasting damage to Akio, a stupid bitch who heals faster than anyone else because he's eating nasty sh*t. How unfair, maybe you should truly start to consider doing the same.

On any other day, you would follow the happenings with a sh*t-eating grin, sadly not today.Butguess what, motherf*cker? This doesn't stop you from throwing some insults that will fall on deaf ears.

“That's why we don't have to ever worry about you, stupid asshole,”is your polite answer, flipping him off with your free hand.

The cushion falls from his face, albeit slowly and almost comically, revealing his smug face once again, and what is his answer to your weak insult? A damn finger heart.You groan at that, and Hakuji deadpans at him. That's it, he loses his privileges to learn mysterious modern stuff from you, not that he knows.

When will this clownery stop?Never, and you know that.

"And still you both love me." His expression becomes mischievous, and you can only guess what kind of stupidity he will now grace upon you, "Especially you little Hime, always trying to undress me with your eyes. How shameless, not that I mind though."

"That was lame," But still, there it goes. Your last f*ck, simply gone just like that. Forever, never to be seen again. You're quite frankly out of f*cks left to give.Yes, yep, alright, you're done, so tiredly done.

And there goes the innocent tea kettle, flying threw the room with a force you have never witnessed before, hitting the target straight on. At least it's empty so Hakuji will not waste any of the precious tea.

The loud crash that resounds through the room is so satisfying, it gives you the good kind of goosebumps. The one you get when your complete being is filled with euphoria.

Yeah, he deserved that.But his snickering doesn't stop, of course, it wouldn't.

"Maybe you should get your eyes checked," Here comes a not-amused Hakuji, bless his poor soul, looking at him as if he's some sort of insect, "And while you're at it, also your nonexistent brain."

"I hope it hurt, oh god, please Akio tell me it hurt," You grin, knowing full well that Akio is risking his life with these statements simply for the fact to annoy Hakuji, or preciously to distract him from thinking of his father.

What better distraction than riling him up by making moves on his current love interest? What a great friend, the best weirdly enough, but you're thankful, even though you have to suffer under his blatant flirting.Well, it boosts your almost delusional high ego, so whatever.

"The only thing that hurts is my poor heart," What a dramatic bitch, dramatically clenching his kimono where his rumored heart is supposed to be.

"What heart? Do you get delusional now?"Was that a question?It didn’t sound like a question. Sounded more like a statement.

"Yeah, someone could punch a hole into your chest and there would be nothing,"you sneer and let out an audible “tch” sound as if it was obvious.

But now he's looking at you as if you just said something purely ridiculous, a smile that screams 'At least you're cute', "Don't be silly, of course, there's gonna be nothing when someone punches my heart out of my body."

You hiss the moment he has the audacity to crawl over and try to pat your head, what are you? A child? Or worse, five? On a scale from one to ten, you're a solid twelve, thank you very much.

Hakuji just pushes his hand away from you, and then actually wipes his own clean on his kimono, as if Akio is dirty, the trash from the last week that has been forgotten. God only knows what he is thinking under this black hair of his.

He can be sopetty, you love it.But ugh, now that you take a second to think about it, it does make sense huh? Of course, there's nothing left after getting a whole ass arm through your body.

"What the f*ck." You hate to admit that he's right,not that you would ever voice that out loud. Before you do that you prefer to get burned alive, or skinned alive. You know what? It doesn't matter what kind of torture, everything is better than admitting that Akio is right.

"Do you wanna try? I volunteer to check if there's anything in there." Hakuji asks so calmly, it sounds angelic in your ears. As if heaven descended on the earth, and for once wants to bless you.

But by now, you just know that you can't have nice things when Akio opens his mouth,"You? Please, your punches feel as if a small kitten tries to grab my attention. Get stronger first before you say such bold things."

And that's your cue to step back, and let them both try to strangle each other, being unsuccessful for yet another time.

Like braids in short hair, you too are barely holding it together, feeling your will to live again swindling at a rapid pace, so you ignore their stupid argument, it's better for your already crumbling mental health anyway. So it's time to stress eat until they calmed down.

Mochi, the only thing that can, for now, make you happy but where the hell did you place them again? Scanning the room real quick, it does not take a detective to solve the riddle, duh, of course, they are on the table.

You twaddle over there, as gracefully as a newly born donkey you dodge the mess of limbs that shouts insults at each other. Not your fight, not your problem.

What good would a war council be if not when two parties are fighting each other like little children on a playground while the rest is shamelessly watching and eating?

First one, then the second, then the third until you're done, not showing compassion to Akio's or Hakuji's portion. It's their fault if they are careless.Blissfully you lick your fingers clean, you're not wasting anything at this point, well, until you finally remembered that you don't have time for this very amusing display before your eyes.

Stupid, you have to plan to run away, to get them to run away with you and not kill each other before that.

Throwing yourself onto the pile of two raging boys was easy, the power you hold over them massive because once your body made contact with them, their movements halt altogether.

A chorus of ‘What the hell?’, and ‘Damn did you get heavier?’ echo in your suddenly deaf ears,“Dimwits, idiots, jerks, stop quarreling and listen to me for once! This is no joke!”

“It’s Hakuji's fault,” Akio retorts at the same time that Hakuji exclaims sharply, “It’s Akio’s fault, [Name].”

You don't care, you were present to know that is fully Akio's fault, but you grace them with a piercing gaze, done with this f*ckery. The silence that follows is your cue to continue your rant.

“Tsukihiko is slowly crawling up my ass, and I don't like that, I really don't. It's annoying, it's stupid, he's stupid.” You furiously punch against Akio’s chest, again and again, showing how severe the situation is, “That f*cker would sell me for rice corn, no scratch that, he would by now pay someone to marry me, it's that bad.”

"Damn, for real?" You almost fell for Akio's sudden pity for you, almost, "You think he would pay me to marry you?"

That was apparently the wrong thing to say because Hakuji start to fight him again, but now with you on top of him. Great. So it's on you again to hold back the furious man as the other one starts to snicker again.

"Are you even from a prestigious family? I beg to differ." Hakuji exclaims, tugging at Akios hair, "There's no way!"

You must weigh absolutely nothing to him because no matter what you do, you can only cling to his back and hope not to fall off and hurt yourself. That would suck, seriously.In response, you puff your cheeks in irritation and return your burning gaze to the boy who holds the entire room's attention.

"But I am! Seriously! I would never lie."

What a pitiful attempt to seem believable, and you laugh at him without any shame, "Yeah? And what is that poor family called that shares the same blood as you?"

"Rengoku."

Liar, liar, pants on fire, you tug at his ear,"Ha, Hakuji I think I'm seriously getting deaf from all the noise, did he seriously say Rengoku?"

"He did." He confirms.

"I did." And now Akio confirms it.

In complete silence, Hakuji looks almost worried while you have a complete inner meltdown. Of course, he wouldn't know why such a name would make you react that way. A bead of sweat rolls down your forehead, and the room suddenly feels so damn small.

"Don't be ridiculous! Rengoku? Impossible!"He has to be a dirty liar, ain't no way, this can't be real.

"Dude." That's the only thing he can say whilein your last attempt to maintain your sanity, what do you do? Right, with your tiny grabby hands, you rip the blindfold from his face. If he is one, he must have at least these owlish eyes, or eye color. While his hair is blond, it's so much lighter and there are no red tips!

And then you gaze into his eyes for the first time, golden eyes that fade to red with white pupils, andthe sound that leaves your throat sounds like a strangled monkey. All the while scrambling to get away from him while dragging the poor confused Hakuji with you. Sucks to be him, he's your shield now.

"No way, absolutely not. I will not acknowledge that! I absolutely refuse to believe that! Nope, no, nuh, nein. Get out, f*ck off!"

You smell panic, yeah, you're panicking, why? You are not even sure, but this situation is just gold— pure gold, and bad for your health. But no matter how you look at it, that's a Rengoku for sure. Maybe not a pureblood one, but a mudblood.

Alright, stop with that sh*t now, it's the wrong fandom, and you don't wanna get reminded of the utter despair you experienced because you never have gotten that damn letter. You're a muggle, nothing special. Draco wouldn't have even looked at you, not even graced you with an insult.

But what are the odds? Is someone f*cking with you again? Is this a joke?No, it's not but what the hell. Thanks to you, Rengoku Kyōjurō will not be the only one from that family to have a history with an Upper Moon.

Man, you already mentally apologizing to him, wishing him luck because he will need it.Thanks to you, Hakuji, or more like Akaza will have some serious and deeply rooted hatred towards the family.

However, you have to give the foolish spawn of the Rengoku household some credit, he doesn’t look disturbed in the slightest by your outburst. He arches an eyebrow, giving the impression of someone who has dealt with your bullsh*t for years even though it's been only a few months. You're that easy, huh?

"So, you're interested now, Hime?"

What is with this stupidity?Now, to give you the credit you deserve, you do not instantly throw something at that smug face.

"Don't even think about it, only over my dead body," There comes the tired response of Hakuji, who looks like he's done caring about anything and just basks in the bliss of you clinging to him. Yeah, right, who cares about Akio when he has you in his arms again?

Hakuji has it hard, truly, sitting here, being this close to you and not kissing you? You can hear him sigh, and you just roll your eyes.

"Yeah, no, but thanks." You trail off, choosing your next words almost carefully,"You don't exactly seem like husband material."

"I would be a great husband! The absolute best!"

Now it's Hakuji's and your turn to start laughing hysterically at him, never have more funny words been spoken. And it doesn't help that he looks so serious now.

"I'm so sorry but we all know that Hakuji is the only one in this room that would be the absolute best husband." You wheeze out, speaking the truth for once.

Hakkuji grabs you tighter, so much happiness bubbling under his skin, "That's right,get in line loser."

Akio crosses his arms defiantly and pouts, and it's not hard to see what he thinks about you two now:Idiots. Stupid idiots. Stupid, stupid, stupid.

Aw, now your tummy hurts, great. You brush away the tear that rolls down your face, and with the other, you cling to Hakuji to not fall over from all the laughing, "I'm sorry, okay? Don't pout, it's adorable, so cute."

He rolls his eyes, grabbing the long-forgotten blindfold from the ground, and securing it around his face once again. That's better and doesn't freak you out. Everything is alright again.

"You two are made for each other, how disgusting, bullying the poor hard working people without any shame."At this, you nearly spit at Akio and he quickly backpedals, yeah, as he should. Cower in fear, you dimwit.

"I smell jealousy, it stinks." Hakuji is quick to answer, once again throwing something in the general direction of Akio.

Soon this whole home will be destroyed by flying objects. Not that you mind, but it would help your plan to run away, and without a functioning and standing household, these two are forced to accompany you.Oh, yes. It's all coming together.

Wait. How the hell did you all manage to once again drift away from your very serious problem? Playtime is over now, time for business.

"Yeah, yeah, he's a stinky boy, and we love him but I'm still running out of time!"you chip in cheekily, hating how you kind of have to throw yourself into the center of attention as if you're some dumb damsel in distress.

The sigh both of them let out after your remark is almost terrifying in synchro, how curious. A hand lands on top of your head, and you don't even have to check who it is, of course, it's Hakuji. Your knight in not-so-shining armor.

"You're still on about that? I thought it is obvious," He starts patting your head gently, and you crane up your head to look at him, "I don't know about the waste of breath over there, but you should know that I would never just let you leave without me."

And then, someone squishes your face almost painfully, "Sad to agree but as if I just leave the only entertainment of my life alone. Who else but you two idiots could make existing at least a bit fun."

This right here warms your heart endlessly, in a sense you knew they would run away with you. Yet, a small part had always some sort of doubt.

But not anymore, you smile at them, beaming,"Well, then hold my goddamn hand, you losers. From now on, we're using the buddy system until we get seriously sick of each other!"

It will be fun, you told yourself.

What could be better than starting an adventure with your new demon-eating bestie, and your maybe soon-to-be fiancee because you're damn sure you can't say no again if he will ever ask you again? Nothing, you told yourself, how utterly naive and dumb of you.

You always asked yourself, what could possibly go wrong? Nothing you couldn't handle, you told yourself, like a precious newborn doe-eyed fawn. Not knowing that the dude with the gun is not your friendly forest neighbor, just like your bunny-like friend Thumperbut a stupid bitch.

Ever since the day you started to have this little friendly trip, you feel the light inside you dwindle a little more with each passing day andyou might have avoided this a million ways if you had been more careful, but who are you to waste thoughts on something that may sound like a good idea in your head?

But then again, many things do sound heavenly in theory, but in practice not so much.

For example, having a very relaxing bubble bath in your bathtub and having quite a few drinks, sounds fun, until you're too drunk to get out. Or sex on the beach sounds exciting and fun, no, there's sand everywhere. Everywhere, even after a week. So have you heard, you're a pure soul and totally do not speak from any personal experience. Amen.

However, why was this adventure that has been going on for months by now, not so great anymore?

Is it the lack of money? No, oh god no, that's not the issue, all three of you together have enough to build a house or two if you all feel luxurious again. You three are the Monopoly man of the middle class of the Edo Era, the only thing missing is a monocle and a stylish hat. You always have enough to pay for an inn or food or whatever anyone wants simply because they have the urge.

So that's not the issue, is it that all three of you have no idea where you would end up, that you have no concrete destination in mind? No, you three may share a single brain cell, but surprisingly that was also never a problem. Quite the opposite, it is fun! Nonetheless, you want to magically end up at Koyuki and her father's dojo, someday, maybe, who knows.

But once you have been wandering around for days, or a little over a week, you're not sure anymore, and that is simply because nobody has a sense of direction in your little group. Well, that is until you all arrived at a big city and Akio proudly exclaimed that "See, we are back in Edo, and you didn't trust me. Kneel and bow, you insects and beg for my forgiveness."

His dreams and Hakuji's and your sanity shattered when a friendly woman explained to you all that this was in fact not Edo, no, of course, it isn't, it's Kyoto.

For you? Heaven, a nice surprise, your eyes glimmering at the thought of trying some local specialties while Hakuji is insulting and beating the sh*t out of Akio. You felt like a tourist, spending maybe a bit too much money, but it was all worth it. You have eaten like kings and saw many future sightseeing attractions.

And the best thing?

You didn't get thrown out of the inn, for as always being a complete pain in the ass. Normally it would go like this, you all arrive, Akio has a smug smile on his face, throws his arm around your shoulder, and demands two rooms. Naturally, only the best one for him and his beautiful wife, what a damn liar, and the shabbiest one for the unnecessary burden while signaling towards Hakuji.

Nobody laughs, especially not Hakuji and it doesn't matter how often Akio does it, it still rills him up. And he's quick to call him out for his lies, and sadly verbally and physically fight him on the spot. Children, both of them. You are used to it, so you just sweatdrop as you try to navigate with the inn owner about some discount, without any luck because they all tell you the same damn thing.

Please get the f*ck out and never come back.

Ergo, yes, it's quite a shocker when you weren't thrown out again, no, the owner found you all loveable, fun, and something along the line of so quirky. The whole experience was so bizarre, you thought you were in some parallel universe for a moment.You are sure that was just a joke, but no, they were serious.

But then they wiggled their eyebrows in that improper way when you told them you all only need one room, and that's when you realized why the owner found you all so loveable.Yeah, no, not in this life.

Yet the food was yummy so, you didn't mind that the owner thought you have your indecent fun with two very much attractive men. They were probably just jealous, of whom of you three, you did not want to find out.

And hey, at least the [Name] in their imagination got some deserved fun, good for her. That was when you got jealous, and it was time to get the hell out of there. That place would have corrupted your mind otherwise.

But that's beside the point, there was even a nice lady who gave you some sort of map, and wow, yeah, you were far from home.No wonder you haven't encountered any demons at all, Muzan is apparently nice enough to have them linger only in the "Edo prefecture" or well, the modern Tokyo prefecture, or simply the Kanto region.

Why? Who knows, it's a manga, it's all coming from the imagination of one person and you don't want to think too deeply. But if you have to guess, it's because of the damn flower.

As a matter of fact, you know where they are, those prissy little flowers that are complete jerks, who probably think to themselves; "Blooming is hard, we’re so fragile, let’s just peek our little petals out every few years for just a few hours at a time. In sunlight! Oh, yes, we like sunlight.”

And they are damn picky about their damn soil too; "If it’s not juuuust right, we’re gonna shrivel, we’re gonna shrivel up so hard, we’ll show you, don’t look at us, we’ll shrivel up because of that too ‘cause we’re so sensitive, boo hoo, sob." Bitches, these flowers are bitches.

Nonetheless, when they bloom, of course only if they feel like it, somewhere around Mt.Kumotori where, oh, what a nice surprise, you have been living with Uta and Yoriichi for almost a decade, not that you would tell anyone. You're not that stupid, seriously, but maybe you should not start poking the bear named Muzan.

The last thing you need is to get turned into a demon for real, that stupid bitch can read thoughts and either you die on the spot or accidentally think about these damn flowers, or maybe over every single event that will happen in the future. That would be bad, truly bad.

But you're drifting away from the question of why you slowly but surely are not amused anymore about this whole trip. And it's simple. Your patience is running thin, so damn thin. It's fragile, so quick to break by now, just like the damn flowers. And why? Because of that.

"Bitch."

"Vermin."

"Idiot."

"f*cker."

"Asshole."

"You're a waste of breath."

"You're a punishment towards humanity."

You sigh for the twentiethtime in the last hour. Yeah, it's annoying, irritating, and bothersome and you're in the middle of it all. These two cannot stop, maybe it's the boredom, maybe it's just that they see each other every damn day for months.

There's sadly no squirrel this time to help you out of your misery, that was fun. Akio had to fight a small precious squirrel because it stole his blindfold, it was a majestic sight to behold, he looked like a clown. And it helped to stop these two from insulting each other for hours.

Now you really need another one to save the day, you look around, meekly, but no, none. Only judgmental gazes from the people around you. This is not good, not good at all. A blush instantly rises to your cheeks in pure embarrassment and you want to hide your face in your hands.

You don’t fault people for gawking at you like an animal on display at the zoo, you would totally do the same if you saw some idiots throwing some insults at each other without even looking and their poor friend in the middle of it all, having a yet another small breakdown.

Okay, you have officially f*cked up. Wait no, these two f*cked up.

You're damn sure that thanks to them you all can sleep under the stars again. Ugh, f*ck, stupid idiots, you do not want to cuddle with some insects or worms again, no you want to either cuddle with Akio or Hakuji, preferably Hakuji he is the better hugger, Akio drools but you should have known better, they should have known better.

Is this puberty? Is it the hormones? Is there no single thought behind their stupidly beautiful eyes?

No wait, perhaps it's because you're mainly the one who uses the single brain cell you all have been sharing. That sound about right.Yeah, it makes sense.

Ah, [Name], once again you surprise yourself with your brilliance. What a queen, go off.

You stop dead in your tracks, you cannot believe it.What the f*ck, what the hell, you're now praising yourself?

Why, oh why, did you decide that fateful day to steal that ugly ass sword from that knocked-out dude, why did you run away from Hakuji and found a wild Akio instead. Is this your punishment for stealing, lying, and being a terrible human being altogether?

Maybe. The chances are truly high but f*ck this,you need to have a conversation with someone who isn't Akio or Hakuji, someone with common sense, ASAP, it's an emergency, sir. Their stupidity is getting to you, and you're all doomed if the last drop of intellect is also withering away at a rapid speed.

As you three round a corner, for once your cry for help is answered in the form of a damsel in utter distress, hallelujah! Jackpot!Yes, oh my dear gods thank you so much for this, you will neverdoubt their holy power and gifts ever again—

Wait, uh, of course you mean, oh no, poor girl, you have to help and oh so sadly leave the site of these dimwits. How terrible, so terrible, and heartbreaking.

You grin to yourself, ready to whoop in, and have an excuse to not listen to any more bullsh*t, it's not surprising that these two feel the shift in your demeanor and instantly hold you back from being a hero.

It's just that you hate how you in fact become surprised, the f*ck is wrong with them.If you haven’t got rid of your last f*ck months ago, you would be losing your mind.

What the f*ck is happening, there is an adorable girl in despair before you, clearly, in eyesight, not hidden, nothing, it's not an illusion, getting dragged forcefully around by some ugly idiot and these two are just watching?Well, kudos to them for noticing, you guess.

You should be proud that these two are not laughing at the poor girl, primarily Akio that asshole, or completely ignoring the situation while yawning and asking what you all gonna do later, mainly Hakuji.

Oh god, oh god, oh god, you ruined him, you ruined the Respect Women Juice consumer number one Hakuji personally. His pure soul, all white and shiny is now corrupted and dark, all thanks to you.

No wonder you get punished most of the time by ridiculous circ*mstances. Or is it because you normally wouldn't even notice anyone in need of help and ignore them, so these f*ckers just follow your bad example? It isn't even on purpose! You swear it's not because you're lazy or disinterested!

And this time you noticed with your perfect 20/20 eyesight a maid in distress, you're ready to spring into action but your friends are so f*cking incompetent. You want a refund, no you demand it!

Oh, right, lovely girl, back to focus on her.

Alright, adorable is the understatement of the day. A frail, fair-skinned young lady, and with what you can see she has large, rounded beautiful pink eyes, and black hair that is neatly tied into a large bun, while wearing a circle-patterned, pink kimono that faded into a snowflake pattern, and if she wasn't in so much misery, she could pass off as an angel.

You wouldn't even question it, it would explain how something so beautiful walks this nasty world. But she's young, certainly younger than you, and wow did you just discover something along the way of a maternal instinct? Because damn, you sure as hell have the urge to protect her.

So, who's the fool that forcefully drags around your newly adopted daughter? You don't know, but does it matter? He looks as if he doesn't even deserve to breathe the same air as anyone that is present right now, and young, oh so young. Just like her, a child, but an aggressive one that needs a got beating.

That does bring the question as to why dear lord are you getting held back? Because of the sword on the child's hip? That's hardly a threat to you. Hell, you're sure that the brat is actually struggling to carry it, no way he could ever do any damage to you. After all, you carry two and have no problems.

"Earth to losers, are we just standing here or, I dunno, do something?"you murmur, pulling at both their sleeves, almost desperately. Who are you fooling, you're desperate.

"I wanna see how this plays out." Comes the answer from dimwit one, and yes, he is a lost course. "You think that's his way of flirting? Never seen such wild sh*t."

Alright, time to turn toward the one with common sense, your last hope, Hakuji, your loveable man that would never ever do anything wrong. Go my Duke of the North, and show this world that you still respect women! Direct your inner protagonist energy at that worthless worm and prove us all wrong!

"Is it even our place to interfere? Maybe this is just an innocent fight between children or siblings." He nudges your side, daringly so in an affectionate manner, the audacity, "I'm not in the mood to throw hands with a child, to be honest."

"It is probably not different from fighting Akio though."

The only answer you get is a gasp from said manchild, followed by a simple, "How rude? I'm better than some grumpy child with a third-class sword."

"Only because you're blade is better doesn't mean you do not have the intelligence of a child. Maybe that's your long-lost brother or even your son? He has the same loser aura as you."And back to bickering they are andwow, disappointed but weirdly enough you're not shocked.

Fine.

You tried, that brings you to use force then.With a confidence that you normally do not possess in the slightest, you stride forward, leaving Hakuji and Akio behind to eat your dust. You will gladly throw hands with a child, you're pissed and annoyed, and hungry. That fool is doomed, especially since there's nothing holding you back.

The adorable girl weakly tries to protest against the brat, who alone from his stance radiant truly the arrogant loser energy, and for you it's enough when you notice that the cutie is not in a good condition at all. Her face is red, and tears gather in her eyes.

"Stop making such a big deal out of it. How about you start being glad that I want to take you out on a date?" She's shrieking away from the fool, and you would too because damn, that's one annoying voice if you have ever heard one.

So, damn the consequences that may be fatal later on, you do what every normal angry person would do and youlike to go on record as being opposed to the use of violence being used for purposes of conflict resolution, however!

Bonk his head mercilessly and forcefully with your sword. Not the good one, no, with Tsukihiko's, and the brat can be glad that it's still in its sheath. It must hurt according to the sudden hiss that comes from his filthy mouth, good, that was your intention.

"Hey trash in human form, how about you stop touching her, never heard of consent? " You bonk him again before he has even a chance to react to anything that is happening, and now he's almost kneeling in pain, letting finally go of the poor girl to hold his head. He will have some annoying headaches in the next few days.

"Who do you think you are?" Eventually, he turns towards you, and finally, you can see the brat that hurt your precious daughter up close, and what a joke. You quite literally look down on him, the sun blazing from behind you, and so he has to squint his eyes before they widen again, his face red from what you guess is anger., "I— Huh, Wha— Wait, who are you?"

You can only scowl, did you hit him too hard? Does he have some brain damage now or why else he has such a hard time forming a simple sentence? But it's unlikely that he even has something like a brain.

Well, well, well, doesn't matter, now it's time to look at thispig kneeling in the dirt, where he belongs, for real good, and you're so disappointed.

He does not have the looks to be pretentious.Not in the slightest, no. He can't even tie his ponytail neatly, with all the strands hanging around, if it was intended to create some wild look, then without any success.Thick eyebrows, sharp eyes, and that's it? He is normal-looking, nothing special, an NPC you would forget the minute he's gone.

Perhaps to the unassuming eyes of normal people, he could be something along the line of good-looking, but not to you though. You have been surrounded by the most attractive and stunning individuals that have ever walked this earth, Yoriichi, Michikatsu, the Sengoku Squad, Hakuji, and Akio, and it hurts to say even your own brother was good-looking but that piece of trash before you is not it.

”Oh hell no, you don't get to ask any questions you insect, who do you think you are to treat a woman that way huh? Do you think that's attractive? It's pathetic, it's filthy, like a dog in heat, I should hit you again.” Your voice is colder than Russian in winter, even you're impressed by your icy fury, “She should be glad? Nah, don't make me laugh. That's not how it works, you should be delighted to even be able to lay your slimy eyes on her, maybe I should gouge them out. It's better for the safety of every female in this area.”

Your beautiful rant is accompanied by laughter and snickering from your buddies behind you, not that you can hear it. Too busy to give that sad of an excuse for the male species your unfiltered opinion.

In all the years and lives you had to endure, you had your own share of encounters with some very questionable and nasty men. It's a sad truth, but you always managed on your own, or your idiots, the ones that you can proudly call real men, who were quick to bark at anyone and did not shy away to resort to violence.

But the child who looks so scared, so fragile, could not manage such a horrendous situation on her own, and she's not the only one. The are hundreds, thousands of women, hell, it could take only one bad day that even you would not have the strength or luck to return safely home. But with traumatic scars so deep, so filthy, and filled with so much shame.

The one kind you can not wash away from your skin, no matter how hard you scrub your body until it bleeds. Because you still see, still feel the hands on you, so foul, so goddamn dirty and they do not go away. Never.

Yes, you will not show any mercy for such behavior, and the precious child is swift to recognize that you’re here to aid her and protect her. So she makes haste to hide behind you, grabbing tightly onto your haori so that her knuckles are probably white from the sheer force. As if you vanish if she lets go, pressing in an urgent manner against you, and my god, her body temperature is too high.

And you let her, covering her even more with your body, naturally, you do! Women have to support each other and respect each other, especially when these sickos don't.

"Why are you getting so riled up, huh?No need to be so aggressive!"He throws his hands defensively before him, his face is a remarkably interesting hue of red, and you don't favor that color, "Do you have any idea who I am? If you knew you wouldn't dare, you bitch, you—"

By all means, you're not a person who's easy to anger, you do not care if someone calls you some names. You don't start kicking, screaming, and cursing over such minor things. You curse a lot, that's true, but it's always fun and games, it shows your adoration towards your losers.

You can’t help it though but think that you could kill the guy before you. Not just talk about it, joke about it, but truly kill him. It's such a powerful and inviting thought. It's so rare for you to be seething, to be this furious, and it’s all that is left in you, and feeling that being like that at this moment, it’s scary.

"Look at me, look me in the eyes. Does it look like I give a single f*ck?" You look him straight in the eyes, dismissing his anger with your hand, "You could represent our damn country and I would still slap you the sh*t out of you. I won't hesitate, you scum, filthy rat, dickhe*d, douchecanoe, bastard. Is this how your parents raised you? You are an utter disappointment, I pity them."

"The f*ck did you just say?!" He barks at you, finally standing before you instead of kneeling. That must have hit a deeply rooted nerve, perhaps some sort of daddy or mommy issues, not that you care. Yet, the red is evolving into an even deeper shade, a vein pulsing on his temple.

"You want me to repeat myself? You're a disappointment! Dirty trash! How about you stop thinking with your tiny dick and bow down again and beg for forgiveness!" You lean forward and jab your finger forcefully onto his chest. Again, and again.

You don't want his apology but the poor girl that is now traumatized for life deserves one, it's the very least that he could do to get out of this situation with all limbs intact.

"As if I would ever bow down to some filthy low-life." He drags out these words, slow and with a hint of disgust on his tongue. His hand, the filthy one who touched the girl gripping the hilt of his sword, "You as a woman should learn to respect men, I should teach you a lesson."

You instantly stop, as if frozen, and your very own world turns red. Your fingers press the skin of your palm so hard you wouldn’t be surprised to see blood leaking from them. With your other hand, which was still occupied by holding Tsukihiko's sword you threw it to the side, not caring if it gets any scratches.

So he has chosen death, if he wants to get physical, alright, you give him a good fight, his ever last fight. One where he will lose his hand, then the other, and then you will stab him repeatedly, any moral you previously had was gone the moment he had the backbone to talk back to you. He asked for it after all.

Everyone but the fool before you instantly feels the shift in your demeanor. Hakuji and Akio know you for long enough, the girl who clings to your back even can feel it. But your boys are not quick enough to hold you back, not fast enough.

You do not take a single step forward, no, you raise the back of your hand, quick, almost graceful, and swing it down with an intenseness you haven't displayed in a long time.It doesn't damage you the moment it makes contact with the skin of the scum before you, it could never hurt you, but it hurt him.

His head swings to the side, followed by his body and there's a hideous crack sound echoing through the otherwise silent street. His saliva flies from his mouth, as he falls on his ass, back on the dirty ground where he belongs.How pathetic, it wouldn't be surprising if his jaw broke, the peaks of using Total Concentration Breathing every single second for years.

It is not enough, not for you at least. It doesn't satisfy you at all, because, because, because—

He should have groveled on the ground from the start and begged for forgiveness, now he has to beg for you to spare his unworthy life. He shouldn't have made an enemy out of you, anyone else but not you.

You have decades of unresolved anger in your veins, it is something sharp, something hard, pulsing so hot under your skin, a scorching flamethat quickly turns into a wildfire.

It is elegantly defined by your ability to surpass such strong emotions. The last time you felt this way was when you died and woke up drenched to the bones next to the river, it's the same red, it's the same sensation. And where does it come from? Who hurt you this much?

This shabby and ugly world hurt you, it took too much from you. It took your friends, never will you ever see your comrades ever again, you couldn't even tell them how much you loved them. It took your Michikatsu from you, he's a demon now, he is out and about killing innocent people, and he brings so much misery now, so much death.

It took the only father figure you have known from you, Soyama-san deserved the world and more. He should have died at an old age, after witnessing his only son getting married and starting his own family. Not because of some ridiculous illness, so slowly and painfully.

And it took your beloved Yoriichi from you. No goodbye, no farewell, you have nothing that reminds you of him, you got so suddenly ripped away from you. It's unfair and pathetic. He must have wandered for decades, alone, grieving you. What if he blamed himself?

All of this defined your already boiling fury, now you let this anger free from its cage once again. All because of this lowlife before you.

Sadly you do not get even the chance to inflict more deserving damage,the moment you grip your own sword, because with the girl clinging so tightly onto you, you can not throw yourself at him so freely is when Akio and Hakuji finally jump before you. Not to protect you, no, you don't need it but that the scum actually has a chance to survive your wrath.

Now you can only see Akio and Hakuji's backs, blocking your view completely, and feel Hakuji blindly grabbing your hand tightly.

He must possess some sort of magical power but his touch alone calms you down your rigid posture softens. The anger still dances in your blood, but the boiling fury from before is gone, leaving behind only adrenaline and never-ending hatred.

You do not see the face of the boy anymore, but you're sure he must be terrified.

First, a woman insulted his whole existence, and with only one slap from the back of her hand, he's down, defeated, and now two strong and very scary men who are dressed so richly that he suddenly becomes aware that maybe, just maybe, your group is of a higher social standing than him are staring mercilessly down on him.

That, of course, is bullsh*t, there's nothing noble about your group, right now you're just some homeless travelers. Not that he knows.

"Don't you even dare," You don't know what is happening, but according to Hakuji's pissed tone, something very stupid that the scum would regret, "If you know what's best for you, you better start running kid."

Akio mockingly shakes his head in disappointment, "Aren't you too nice again?I think we should f*cking castrate that bitch on the spot, we would be doing the world a favor by doing so.“

"And let that little sh*t still wander around? Now you are too nice, why even let him live, I'm sure nobody would miss this lowlife."Comes the answer from Hakuji, arrogance practically oozing from him. He totally spends too much time with the dimwit next to him. Ruined, your poor boy is ruined.

"Ew Akio, you would touch that? I did and I'm sure I'm carrying some sort of disease now." Of course, you have to throw in your very important observation, "You better step away from it before you two catch it too."

"Another reason to let him not see another day."

"Hakuji, we can't murder someone in broad daylight. Too many witnesses. Let's wait until nighttime."

"Right, if we get arrested,[Name] would cry." He nods before quickly adding,"No, she would only cry for me. Akio, go, do your thing, and get arrested. Do us two favors at once."

“You bastard!”

You smile, feeling the light, warm feeling fill your chest. Your anger is gone as you watch those idiots interact, it's dumb, so childish. But it's them.Nobody even noticed the lowlife stumbling on his feet again, and doing what a coward does.

Running away, without apologizing.

You blink, what a bitch. Next time you will make him eat dirt again, and force an apology out of him. Not that you want to see him again, but you would very much refrain from seeing that f*cker ever again. He can choke to death, you wouldn't care.

Both men turn around and examine your face, searching for any lingering irritation, or wounds, or if whatever was said to you hurt your very much delicate feelings. He didn't, he didn't do sh*t, you're more worried that these two will make a big deal out of it,

Plus there's still a very adorable girl hiding behind you so you just smile at them awkwardly, not sure what to say, which apparently was the wrong choice.

Akio is the first to break the weird silence, "Do you want me to run after him and punch him? Kick him? Stab him? Just say the word and I'm on my way!"

Hakuji squeezes your hand delicatelyas if you were made of glass, something precious, but his expression tells you that he too would run after him and destroy his existence, you only need to wish for it, and yet, "Are you alright?"

"Of course I'm alright! Do you seriously think that some random walking trash can could hurt me? As if!" You huff, but your smile becomes more sincere, "Really, don't worry about me so much."

They can get over you any other day and time, but not now. It's time to check if the real victim of the whole situation is alright. So you try to be as gentle as possible as you turn to her, which is hard.She's still gripping your haori, showing no indication to let go.

Huh.

Well, this sucks, because you suck at comforting people, and if they put up a fight or don't even give you the chance to try then you're f*cked.Maybe these two will help? As you gaze at them you lost all hope, they are as lost as you are. So yeah, they will not help.

"Uh— Miss? Hi? Are you alright?"You sweat a little, and looking over your shoulder you can only see her dark hair, "Do you need, uh, help or a hug, or I dunno, something to eat?"

"Smooth," Akio chides you, "Real smooth."

You want to whack his ugly face. As if Hakuji can read your thoughts he does it for you. What a man.

So you continue to frown at Akio, at least you're doing something, when you're upset something to eat always cheers you up, especially sweets and you wouldn't mind buying her so much that she can eat them every day for the next two weeks.

Whatever, he's not worth your time, your attention is back on the adorable girl, who finally lets go of you and blesses you with the most soft-spoken voice you may have ever heard, you thought Uta had the mostserene and melodic voice, but this adorable girl takes it up a notch.

“T– thank you,” She mutters softly, avoiding your gaze, fidgeting with her hands in a nervous manner, "And– And I'm so sorry, that you've put yourself in such trouble for me."

Oh no.Be still, you silly, silly heart.

Your cheeks redden, making you glad that she's not looking at your embarrassing form. The boys do witness it but you don't care at the moment Man, not only is she precious but also polite. Whoever raised her deserves a price for that, and a big fat thank you.

"You don't have to apologize, you did nothing wrong," You smile at her, as softly as possible even though she still stares at the ground, "I'm just glad that nothing worse happened to you."

"Are you hurt anywhere? He grabbed you quite harshly." Is that concern you hear in Akio's voice? For a stranger? The world must be ending soon, or is it just the sheer force of the overwhelming adorableness that the girl radiants? You respect that because same. After all, you already adopted her in your mind.

He and Hakuji are even keeping a good amount of distance from her and you, just to not spoke her even further. They are both men after all, and she just had a traumatic experience with the opposite gender. Maybe there's still hope that these two are not some lost causes.

"Ah– No, I'm alright, I think." Her face is still unnaturally red, and you don't think it's because she's shy, which she is but you remember how warm she was as she pressed herself against you.

Yeah, she's probably not alright. More like a sick person with a high fever who got dragged around the city while the sun is uncomfortable shining down on her the whole time. f*cker, you should have hit him more.

"Are you sure?" You ask, and she only nods. A sigh leaves you, rubbing your neck, "Well, how about we escort you home then? I would feel super bad to let you go alone, who knows if this f*cker is waiting around some corner."

At that, she finally looks up at you, meeting your eyes without shying away. There's something akin to relief and gratitude, and maybe even awe? Haha, no, probably not. There's nothing amazing about your group.

And yet, the longer you look at her, waiting for her answer, the beautiful hairpin in the form of a snowflake is glistering in the sunshine. It instantly catches your attention and— Okay, you need somebody to tell you how to start breathing again because you just f*cking stopped doing it. It’s panic time, is it not?

Goodness, that’s— that'sKoyuki, right? In the flesh and f*ck, you feel suddenly so dirty and undeserving.

Why? Because she’s so innocent and adorable, while you’re dirty, filthy, and corrupted by all the world’s bitterness. You will infect her if you look at her long enough. You use foul language, while she probably has never even heard of the word asshole or f*cker, and oh god, you used these words in her presence already! You ruin everything that is soft, don’t you?

You cannot let her get near Akio at any cost. No way, no. That poor girl would explode from all his teasing. You cannot even let her near the current Hakuji, his heart is black, and he's not gonna be soft or anything.

Wait.Does that mean you slapped the living sh*t out of the f*cking scum that will later kill her, poison this angel to death?

f*ck, no, damn it, you should have stabbed him to death! sh*t, this can't be. You had the perfect opportunity to save this girl and her father from the absolute scum of the earth, the disgrace of humankind, the trashiest trash, and you only slapped him?

You hate your life. Truly.You can only scream at yourself. On the outside, you just stand there quietly, breathing in and out, still waiting for her.

Slowly she smiles at you, and to your surprise grabs your hands, yup, she definitely has a fever and needs to get home quick, "Would you really do that for me?T– thank you so much!"

"Of course! Right, you losers?" You ask your friends behind you, throwing them a gaze that screams pain if they don't come along, and to your utter delight there's a chorus of "Yes!" answering you back, "Just lead the way alright?"

Again she thanks you as she weakly drags you in the right direction of her home.

So, there's truly no escaping canon, huh? You don't know if you should be glad that you met her or cry.

On one hand, yay, it's Koyuki! That means you're one step closer to achieving your goal of searching for Michikatsu.But on the other hand, why do you feel so nervous? Souncertain, so doubtful if you still want to continue with your plan.

For now, you will bring her home and decide later.And teach her not to trust any strangers.

Chapter 10: ACT II • Yūgen V

Chapter Text

This chapter contains material of a highly sensitive nature including:

Graphic Death; Execution; Decapitation; Extreme Violence; Mutilation of a Corpse,Child Abuse; Child Torture, andUbayashiki being a f*ckin bitch

That may be triggering for some individuals.

So far, the first few months living under the same roof as Koyuki and her loving father Keizo were pure delight. Life is great when you don't have to worry about anything but teaching a frail young woman some self-defense to kick some nasty individuals in the streets and tell the tale.

Well, for you at least. You got treated by the small family of two as if you're their newest addition, a big sister that looks out for Koyuki, be it either to keep some leeching neighbors away or nursing her back to health. The only problem was that Koyuki doesn't want to be separated from you no matter what.

Like a duckling who finally found its mother again, or maybe it's simply her desire to show her gratefulness.And you let her have her way for now, she truly was too dainty, too fragile, too pretty for you to reject when she pleaded with her doe eyes. It's only natural that you'd be overjoyed to have a cute girl like her as your little sister.

Hakuji is not in the slightest amused by that, while Akio thinks it's hilarious that Hakuji is jealous of a small defenseless girl.

And for Keizo, you're now the second daughter in this household which he established from week one since he generously let you and begrudgingly your companions stay with them.

Yes, after hearing the story of what happened and how you stepped in for Koyuki, he simply laughed and patted your shoulder. All the while thanking you, so yeah, you got treated like a treasure, which probably is also out of pure gratefulness for protecting his daughter, while the boys are quite literally now his unwilling students and even more unwilling errand boys.

For months, everything is actually fine and dandy.

Thanks to you three, the constant harassment Keizo had to endure to hand over his dojo finally came to a stop. You haven't even heard anything from the lowlife that you gracefully humiliated on open streets. Suspicious but it's whatever for the moment. And if any rumors were floating about, no one would ever dare approach Keizo in the first place knowing that Hakuji or Akio isn't far.

It was easy to slip into the comfort of these peaceful yet monotonous days, it was almost too peaceful, and you almost forgot about Michikatsu.

There's nothing to worry about, nothing to be prepared for. Day in, and day out it was waking up, doing house chores, and entertaining Koyuki until you get dragged away by Hakuji so that you can entertain him, then he got dragged away by Keizo and Akio. Sometimes you would join them in the Dojo, sometimes you would simply explore the area a bit more.

Weeks ago you found quite a nice spot where you can relax without fearing that anyone could disturb you peaceful moments with yourself, where you can freely let your mind wander and think. A beautiful area surrounded by trees and various flowers and while you are sitting under the shade of a tree, letting your eyes wander from flower to flower, it hits you:That was your daily life now.

And it was so goddamn boring.

Your face remains emotionless, all of the curves of your face remaining still, while your brain was starting to turn dull and lazy. You were restless and tired of being cooped up in this small town. It felt suffocating to you after so many months of peace. And as much as you enjoy being treated so precious here, well, you couldn't deny the fact that the novelty wore off quite some time ago.

Even if this sounds awfully selfish and unappreciative.

So you keep it all inside, adoring a content smile and you wish sincerely that you could feel content with this,but every time you are alone in your little hiding place, it all bubbles out. You've been sitting there for hours now, thinking if it is even worth escaping this monotonous life you lead and every time you can't seem to come to a decision.

Aren't you just wasting away at this point? You have the potential, no, you have the strength and the sword to pick up your old occupation. There are people suffering out there under the existence of demons, every day people die at their hands and you could change it, there is no way to stop it but at least you can help.

You can do this, you're strong enough.

Even if you tell yourself all these pretty lies, you know deep down, you wouldn't be doing this for a noble course. Aren't you merely being selfish to think about your own wants and needs when Koyuki and Keizo's safety should be your priority? When you are the only one who knows what these people are capable of.But it will only happen in approximately three years, so it should be alright, shouldn't it?

The more you sit there, the more your mind keeps wandering and your eyes drift from flower to flower, until you finally pluck one, observing the rich violet color and the delicate petals. You stare at it for a moment, feeling the warmth of the sun on your face, the cool breeze blowing across your cheek.

A purple-colored Viola, huh?

It was such a common flower, nothing special with various meanings; innocence, modesty, remembrance. It can express nostalgia for passing love.

A chuckle escapes you at the absurdity as you crush the delicate flower in your palm, your nails drilling into its soft flesh, crushing it to pieces. You let the pieces of the flower fall on the ground, watching them scatter to the wind, leaving behind a scent that lingers for a while.

Perhaps this was a sign, no more denying it. You really want to see him again but god, how selfish must you be to want this more than anything, to risk everything for that, while you have already made a good enough life here?But this is the one thing that you want so desperately. So, so much, that it hinders you to continue to live in the now.

"Damn, what did that small defenseless flower ever do to you, little Hime?"You don't even have to look up to know that apparently, Akio was chilling in the tree you have been sitting under for a few hours. So much for your own secret safe haven. You can't even muster up to be surprised.

"It looked at me the wrong way that little f*cker."The words that involuntarily leave your mouth are soft, nearly silent, still, he hears it and a snort escapes him. "Should have known better than to provoke me."

"Yeah, I am sure the other flowers are now shaking in fear." He doesn't say anything else.

Instead, he simply jumps down from his spot to join you. He sits next to you, looking out of the corner of his eye at you, by now it wasn't even a rare sight to see him without his blindfold, more bizarre is that his expression is blank.

"So, since when have you been watching me like a creep?" You sigh as you start picking up another flower, and another.

The atmosphere makes you want to busy yourself with something, anything. So why not a flower crown? It's been a while and you're sure Koyuki will be overjoyed about the little present. Wait, can you even do that with Violets? Time to find out.

"Ever since you started to have your little pity party." He stops for a second, throwing you a concerned gaze. "But in my defense, I was the first one here!"

"Wow, this makes it so much better," It was your turn to snort at him, "Let me guess, you ran the second you had the chance to escape cleaning duty. What a wimp you are."

He didn't deny it, instead, he just starts picking up some Violets and handing them to you whenever you need one. He doesn't speak or say anything for long minutes. His fingers were gentle, careful as if he was afraid of breaking the petals. His actions weren't forced, there was still a sense of purpose and meaning to them that is unlike his usual brash mannerism.

It's only after several minutes that he finally breaks the silence.

"This is seriously tiresome," Sometimes you wonder if he is incredibly observative or if he can read your mind. But Akio pretends to not notice your change, rather, he asks, "Why are you playing "Happy Family" when it's something you don't even want?"

Your eyes snap to his, as your hands start to tremble, the flower crown almost crushing under the pressure. He doesn't catch your eye, his gaze is focused on the tiny flower in his hand instead.After hesitating for a while, your voice barely audible, "But I do?"

"You're a bad liar sometimes." His answer is immediate, blunt. No hesitation. No emotion in it at all. He's not even trying. "You're restless, every training session with you is getting more bloody and aggressive. There's no way that you can fool me, [Name], you're bored out of your mind, aren't you?"

His tone isn't accusatory but you can feel him waiting. Waiting for you to confess it. Like a priest waiting for the sinner to confess his deepest darkest heinous deeds and he's serious. Why else would he suddenly call you by your name instead of that endearing nickname?

So you throw the flower crown at his face, a silly attempt to break this serious atmosphere. It was suffocating and doesn't fit in the friendship between Akio and you, "There's no way you can read me that well, I am a mysterious person. Have you read my secret diary or something you loser?"

"Oh? A secret diary? " He raises an eyebrow at you, and finally he starts to smile again, "Maybe I will next time. Then I can finally embarrass you in front of others, or blackmail you. Depends on how nice you will act in the future."

"Being seen with you is already embarrassing enough."

"Not with that face I have, you should feel gratefulthat you can look at it every day for free." He chuckles as he picks up the flower crown with his fingers, holding it between his thumb and index finger while placing it on your head, "Come on, show your gratitude. You don't have to be shy."

“Are you stupid? Did Hakuji punch you so hard that you lost all your brain cells?”

“As if. He wishes he could punch that hard.” He gives you a mischievous grin and you roll your eyes at him,“But Keizo-san will if we don't get going. By now he must have realized that I didn't do sh*t.”

The two of you get up from under the tree, and you take a deep breath beforemakingyour way toward the dojo that you have been callingyour home.Akio walks beside you, a slight distance apart.

“Can I ask something?”Helooks back at you, his face stillcarefree as ever.

“Since when did you need my permission? Your whole personality is built on being noisy.” You reply with a shrug of your shoulders.

“Well, you're right about that part,” He pushes you playfully, maintaining a comfortable atmosphere to not scare you away with his next words, "Why did we even stay in the first place? Don't get me wrong, it's nice and everything but you were so persistent on staying with them.”

Youstop walking for a moment to look at him, his question caught you off guard. You try to think about it for a bit, but you can't come up with any logical explanationthat would not reveal anythingtooexplicit.

So you do what you always do when you don't have an answer, you counter-question him, “I mean, nobody forced you to stay. It's not like I begged or anything. So why did you stay?”

"BecauseI don't want to lose my two personal clowns. I will die of boredom otherwise." He answers immediately, with no hesitation, “But you know me well enough to know that I would have continued our travels, and Hakuji that lovesick fool would follow you even into hell if you desire to do so.”

"Alright, now it’s getting ridiculous." You exclaim as you shove his shoulder lightly, causing him to stumble. Your lips form a smile as you gaze at the fake hurt of Akio, what a loser. Trying to entertain you with his little act, even though you both know that it takes so much more to hurt him, "And stop making Hakuji seem like a fool, he has a brain of his own. I think."

"Nah, he isn't a fool but a coward."

A coward? You raise an eyebrow, that's something new. You wouldn't describe Hakuji as a coward, he doesn't shy away from a fight or any conflict, if anything he is most of the time the voice of reason in this little circle of idiots. What the hell is he implying?

"Akio do you perhaps not know the definition of a coward?" You ask, actually starting to frown in worry.

Now you actually worry a bit about the state of his mind.What if he's gonna embarrass himself in front of others with his lack of knowledge? That would actually be fun but you're not that mean. Maybe. Wait. Do they already have dictionaries in the Edo period? If so you know what you're gonna gift him for his next birthday.

"Have you always been this much of an asshole? I'm gonna pretend you didn't just ask me that." He looks at you deadpan, "But it is a good thing that he hasn’t asked you again. You know, to marry him."

"Why do you think so?" You ask him, completely confused about the whole conversation at this point, "Aren’t you the biggest supporter of this may or may not be a relationship?"

"It’s tiresome to watch, you both are so wishy-washy about your feelings." Akio answers as he raises his head,"He’s head over heels for you but is being too much of a coward to ask you again and you’re not even sure what you want in the first place."

"Now I'm feeling pretty vulnerable and honestly attacked, what the hell? Are you my therapist or what?"

How Akio can manage to read you that well, you don't know but you cannot deny this, there's no way you would be against marrying Hakuji but as long as you haven't had your closure from the past the thoughts of Michikatsu will hunt you throughout this life. It was like a curse, a dark cloud that follows you around, never letting you forget.

"Sucks to be you, huh?" he says dryly, "Besides don't you miss it? To go on missions in the middle of the night, to hunt down demons and see their utter despair when they realize they don't stand a f*cking chance against us?"

You giggle lightly at that, and without thinking you answer, "I do. Oh god, I f*cking do. It is so fun to hear them whine and cry about it."

Deep down in a hidden corner, you can be a demon apologist, but that honestly only applies to some rare ones. Mainly because you know of their circ*mstances but you don't have time to hear out every single demon to make a judgment. Even if it's hypocritical of you. But yes, you do miss going on missions, to experience the thrill of hunting down the so-called "Predators of the Night" and watching the despair in their nasty ass faces.

He smiles at you in amusem*nt before continuing, as if he had been reading your mind, "That's because you love your work as much as I do. We are after all proud members of the corps, after picking up the sword there's no going back from it!”

Is he actually trying to make you feel better about your not-so-secret wish to be a full-time Demon Slayer again? If so, that’s really nice and uncommon of him but God, Akio can be such a tolerable person if he wants to be. You are so happy he is in your life, even though you probably don’t deserve him at all.

Before you can even answer him, he's stopping in his track and you notice that you're just a few steps away from the entrance of the dojo. His face turns serious suddenly, so serious that you feel a chill run through you. As if the whole scene is too intense to stand.

So you turn your head to where his gaze is fixed, and the sight before you erupt a feeling inside you that you cannot put into words. Like an invisible cord tightens around your neck, suffocating you. An uncomfortable burn deep in your throat, and the sudden urge to vomit.

At first, you don't understand why. Nothing has changed since this morning, there's nothing unusual at all. It's still the same dojo, as familiar and welcoming as before, the smell of dust and sand permeating the air. You see the training ground and the open-air training area, the same trees planted around the area.

But then you focus on the people standing in the middle of it.

Hakuji is as beautiful as always, with a broom in his hand, grumbling something you cannot pick up from the distance, or your ears simply do not register any sound at all. Keizo who's laughing heartily, patting Hakuji's shoulder with a bit of strength behind it, and Koyuki with a rosy face, hiding her giggles behind her sleeves. It is so normal, so ordinary, so normal.

It is so normal, so ordinary, so peaceful.

This is how it should be right? That is how it was supposed to be right? And yet, the second you focus on them again, they become the source of a thousand needles in your skin. The pressure in your throat grows as you struggle for breath, the feeling of suffocation increasing until you feel your knees weaken.

"So this was your plan from the beginning?" He questions, his golden-like eyes serious, "That is why you wanted to stay with them? So that Hakuji has a home while we’re gone?

"Then why did even ask in the first place when you already knew? And you wonder why I hate you." Despite your playful remark at the end, it doesn't lift the mood, if anything it makes you gulp down the nasty feeling so you ask, "Is it selfish, Akio? That I will leave this all behind for such a swallow reason?"

"Well, what is your reason?" He counters.

Lips pursued into a thin, sharp line, you think of a way how to explain yourself, but does it even matter? Akio is probably the only one you can tell something remotely close to the truth. Hakuji does not know the existence of demons, and how Akio and you managed to keep it that way is nothing short of a miracle.

"There’s someone I’m searching for." You begin and then take a deep breath, "He taught me my Breathing Technique but now he’s a demon. I don’t even know why but I just want to see him again, maybe to confirm it with my own two eyes or, I don’t know. It’s not even about saving anyone at this point."

"Then yes, but it doesn’t mean it’s a bad thing. In the first place comes you, if you think that your decision is the best one for you then it is." Akio looks at you, a knowing glint in his eyes and you take everything good you have said about Akio back. He's like the snake in the Garden of Eden, sugarcoating your doubts and desires."Besides, it’s not like you’re the only one with ulterior motives. I started doing it for the money, saving people is just a pretty neat bonus, isn’t it?"

Buthe's right, this is for you alone. This decision is not for the greater picture but for something as insignificant as you. Even if the price you have to pay is the fragile feelings Hakuji harbors for you, it is one you decided to pay for.

“But in the end, we are Demon Slayers, Hime. And as long as we are, we will always leave and there’s no guarantee that we will come back or stay.” Your heart clenches and you find your hands gripping the fabric of your kimono.The arm around your shoulders tightens, and perhaps Akio sees the same view as you.

A Garden of Eden you cannot enter, a paradise you do not have a place in and it's not as if anyone but yourself is hindering you from it.Saving people is a pretty neat bonus, huh? What a liar. You both are your own prison guards, your own mind the prison. An obligation you both put on yourself, shackles you cannot simply throw away now.

“Look who decided to finally show up again,” Keizo’s booming voice rips you out of your thoughts. "Finally done running away?"

You don't know how long you two have been standing there just watching them but now all attention is on you. Hakuji and Koyuki’s faces light up at the sight of you before Hakuji turns in a frown after seeing the sh*t-eating grin of Akio and the arm that's slung over your shoulder.

And back to being the annoying bitch he is, that was quick. Akio is probably bipolar or some sh*t.Nevertheless, the heavy feeling that burns in your stomach vanquishes as he starts making his way toward you. The broom thrown onto the ground is long forgotten and it makes you smile.

"And you're sure?" Akio whispers as he leans closer, his voice husky, "That you won't regret it? After all, it's your decision now.”

He sends you a look. You send him one back.

He starts to grin even more and looks back at you.

You arch your eyebrow up, shaking your head.

Of course, you're going to regret it. There's no way there would not be one single moment that makes you question your choice but it is what it is. Isn't it almost natural?

He starts tochokeyou with his snake-like arm until he is ultimately kicked to the ground his arm finally losing its grasp on your shoulder. A squeak of panic leaves his mouth and you snickeras you find yourself in the embrace of much more comfortable arms.

Somebody has finally taken mercy on your poor, tired soul and stopped the monster in his stupid antics andyou hear the sweet, charming voice of your savior, "You stupid piece of sh*t. You run away and leave me with all the work and then have the audacity to show up again as if you have done nothing wrong?"

"You sure you're not just jealous I had some sweet alone time with[Name]?"Comes the rushed question of the elder boy still laying on the ground, having no shame as he smiles and wiggles his eyebrows.

A little growl spilled out from him again as he lifts you up by your waist and somehow slid you around his body until you are pressed up against his back, his arms wrapped around you awkwardly.The answer to Akio's stupid question comes in the form of another kick, and another one.

Then a third before Hakuji says, "Who would ever be jealous of you? There's nothing to be jealous of, if anything I pity[Name] that she had to live through your constant harassment."

"So you are!"

Akio truly does not know when to stop. Not only is he bipolar, but he's probably also amasoch*st. If this goes on, then you guess you sent off a prayer.

RIP his last brain cell. You will be missed dearly.

"Calm down, Hakuji,” Keizo suddenly stands beside you and all of the chaos magically disappears. There is something about him that makes Akio actually gulp in fear, not that you would mind. Anyone who can create such a reaction from him deserves your inner praise."I am sure I can come up with a fitting punishment for him."

He does his thing, the whole "I am not mad, but disappointed" dad thing, making Akio promptly stand up as ungrateful and clumsy as he is and start spouting some excuses.

Every single time it works wonders, you wish you would hold so much power over this gremlin, but then again. It's more fun to encourage such bullsh*t behavior. You aren't exactly what anyone would call a good example.

Hakuji just openly laughs at Akio's misfortune as Keizo is giving him a lecture about responsibilities and all these things as if he was a seven-year-old. That's when you turn out the whole thing,they have lost your attention by now.

Sighing softly, you look at Koyuki from the corner of your eyes, fiddling with her fingers until you offer her your own hand to hold. She beams at you, eyes twinkling as if you had just presented her with the most treasured thing in the world before eagerly taking it. Your poor heart, she's so precious.

Oh, right! With the other hand, you take the almost forgotten flower crown from your head and place it on her head, "Here, I made it for you while I was away."

“Thank you so much, [Name]-chan!” She is averting your gaze and reaching towards the delicate flowers on her head. It seems to lift something from inside her. A smile blooms on her lips as if you did some miracle to her. It takes everything within you not to laugh because it's so precious seeing her like this, that little flower crown bringing so much life to her face.

"You don't need to thank me." You give a warm smile, "Next time I am going to teach you how to make one on your own."

"Yes please!" She says with a small laugh and her cheeks grow redder when you pat her head and pull away.

This is once again a moment where your mind cannot comprehend how someone could ever want to hurt something as pure as her. Maybe you should really get rid of the neighboring dojo before they even have the chance to do anything.

But the question is, can you even live with the knowledge that you murdered someone who hasn't even done anything yet? There is no guarantee that they will poison the well, or try to do anything else. Just because they did in the Manga, does not mean they will do in this, uh, world? Timeline? Whatever.

As if sensing your odd mood, Hakuji nudges your head with his own. His soft hair tickled you, making you almost jump if it weren't for the steady hold he has on you. He whispers to you quietly, "Are you alright?"

The worry in his eyes, his gentle grip around yourbody, and the way he holds you close to him as if it is such a normal thing to do that you can't help but melt from all this kindness, makes your heart swell.

Before you can even stammer out any lie, the words on the tip of your tongue are interrupted by Akio.

“I am a responsible person!” That sounds like a lie, but who are you to argue with him now, “We were job hunting, isn't that right little Hime?”

What.

“Job hunting?”Keizo repeats back the question, arching an eyebrow before turning his attention to you, “Is that so?”

What the hell? Your eyes find the golden ones of the person that puts you on the spot until you finally realize–

You have to make a decision, now.

Either you will gothroughwith your decision to search for Michikatsu, the one person you desired to see the most since you have awoken in this time period besides his brother.

Oryou will continue doing what you have been doing until now.Staying here, nursing Koyuki, having a may or may not possible relationship with Hakuji, and waiting for the tragic incident that could happen or maybe even not.

This is your chance to decide. It's now or never. And there is only one way to answer this—

“Yes, we did,”The same content smileonyourface that you wore for the past couple of weeks, as your fingernails dig into the soft flesh of your palm, “And guess what? We got one!”

The little adventure that you three had come to an end now, it is time to go back to your prison and as long as you both have a sword in hand, the verdict is a life sentence.

And you are the judge who sealed this fate.

"The tale takes time during the reign of the Emperor of Engi. There lived a notorious demon named Shuten-doji on Mount Oe in the Tanba Province. He haunted not only the provinces nearby and even the ones far away but also the imperial capital of Kyoto as well, and kidnapped young and beautiful daughters of noble families."

The sky is filled with stars that shine down on the land, and the wind gently blows across the mountainside, carrying the sweet smell of flowers and pine trees.

Koyuki requested that you read her a story tonight before she falls asleep, it's an adorable request, it sometimes makes you forget that she's thirteen but Koyuki has never seemed more innocent than now, there is something very pure about her; it makes you wonder again why someone would ever want to harm her and besides it is the least you can do to make her happy before you will be gone.

Hakuji on the other hand, well, he hasn't talked to you at all since your announcement and you cannot blame him.

You continue reading from the book in your hands, "The worried families spoke with the Emperor, who delegated Minamoto no Yorimitsu and his most loyal warriors Usui Sadamitsu, Urabe no Suetake, Watanabe no Tsuna, Sakata no Kintoki, and also Fujiwara no Yasumasa, an imperial commander, and ordered them to hunt down the demons."

Koyuki looks up at you from her futon, eyes sparkling with curiosity "But why do they have to hunt all demons when it's Shuten-doji who is kidnapping these girls?"

You think for a moment about this question, then answer, "I believe it was because the Emperor feared the demons would take over the entire country if left unchecked. The men were therefore charged with hunting them down and eliminating them wherever found."

Koyuki looks disappointed, and pouts her lips "Are all demons evil then?"

Your heart leaps in your chest, are all demons evil? It is a difficult question, one that has many different answers depending upon whose perspective you choose, some people may see things as black or white while others might view them through shades of grey.

So you are going to tell her your perspective, "I don't think that all demons are evil, just like how humans aren't born inherently wicked so I feel we need to judge each situation separately. Sometimes though the lines between good and evil blur and this is where our opinions clash and it becomes hard to discern what exactly is right."

You almost feel silly to talk about such heavy themes with Koyuki, you aren't even entirely sure if she even understands half of what you're saying. She seems content listening to you however and does not ask further questions.

So you merely continue the story, "The six men were all brave and renowned nobles, and they prepared themselves, knowing that demons are not dealt with by ordinary means. First, they made devotional visits to Iwashimizu Hachimangu, Sumiyoshi Myojin, and Kumano Gongen, and disguised themselves as mountain priests before setting out towards Mount Oe. As they became lost on steep mountain roads, they met three mysterious old men. They gave the nobles sake called Jinpen Kidoku Shu that turns into medicine for humans and poison for demons, and were also given directions."

A medicine that's poison for demons? That can't possibly be Wisteria or is it?

Well, some report says that the stems and flowers of Wisteria were used in Chinese medicine for the treatment of heart ailments which yeah, they aren't poisonous. But the seeds are, consume a bit of them and you are going to be greeted by a burning mouth, nausea, abdominal pain, vomiting, and diarrhea, and if you are not already unlucky enough it is followed by collapse.

If you ever have the displeasure of getting reborn into the Taisho Era you are gonna ask Shinobu more about Wisteria, and after that, you are gonna tell her that her plan is utter bullsh*t. Yes, that's right, you personally think that her suicidal plan is stupid, throwing away her life for revenge. If it weren't planned and written down by the author, there was no guarantee for anything.

You are so deep into your thoughts that you almost didn't notice Koyuki who sits upright on the floor looking intently at you. Her dark hair hangs loosely behind her shoulders and her cheeks glow faintly pink, "So then what happened next?"

"Um... Well, uh..." You quickly turn the page to get to the next part, as Koyuki lays down again, "The six men who successfully reached Onigajyo faced Shuten-doji. However, Shuten-doji and his underling, Ibaraki-doji, suspected that Yorimitsu and his group were not mountain priests but military commanders. But Yorimitsu and his men were able to earn the trust of Shuten-doji, by pretending to know nothing about the strangers they had accidentally met, and by performing a dance, keeping in step with the demons. They were also successful in giving Shuten-doji and the other ogres the special sake that they had brought."

Your mind drifts off for a moment, wondering if maybe, perhaps, Demon Slayer was inspired by this tale. Or maybe it was simply a coincidence? Well, one thing is for sure, Shuten-doji cannot be Muzan. The Demon Lord himself walked among humans without any trouble in that era.

"As he crept into his sleeping quarters, Shuten-doji showed his true identity and slept soundly, in the form of a demon. The three old men appeared again, tied together Shuten-doji’s hands and feet, and ordered Yorimitsu to cut off his head. The old men turned out to be the incarnation of gods. Yorimitsu beheaded Shuten-doji. The remaining five warriors fought with the underling demons. Yorimitsu and his men who exterminated the demons in such a way saved the princesses, and returned to a world of peace in the capital."

When you finish the story altogether, you frown. Not because Koyuki is finally asleep and couldn't hear the end but rather because you are troubled by its ending. No wonder humans think that demons aren't real anymore. Maybe they should have written how miserably they failed.

Failed as you did. Failed as you always going to.

“You can't be serious. Why does it have to be a job where you're away from here for months if not years, and with Akio at that?“

Oh-uh.

Somebody is in some serious trouble, and this time it's you! Well to be fair, trouble finds its way to you like an innocent moth who seeks the golden and luminous light of an electric mosquito killer but this time it's your own fault.

After explaining to everyone what kind of job Akio and you have taken up, which was a big fat lie, and thankful Akio was the one doing the lying while you just nod at whatever bullsh*t he spouted out. And God, it took everything in you not to gap at him or even roll your eyes because how the hell did he manage to think of such a story while nobody even thought about questioning it? Is it some sort of plot armor? Sheer luck??

Because apparently, you both are now official bodyguards for some high-ranking official who wants to inspect the land and it's better to only have two random people instead of their trusted subordinates. If someone told you that story, you would have called them out on their bullsh*t. Maybe Keizo didn't question anything because either of the money that you promised to send over or because he thought it is not his place to object.

Still, naively you had thought that would get at least a good night's rest before the inevitable discussion with Hakuji.

Yeah, no such luck; no sleep for you. Which was to be expected, there was no way that Hakuji would be the slightest bit amused by your spontaneous plan, especially since Akio and you haven't even bothered to involve Hakiju at all.

You were already snuggled in two blankets because if nobody wants to cuddle then you have to compromise it with two or three blankets, so ready to call it a day and welcome yet another nightmare when the door to your room burst open and somebody enters with the grace of an elephant. The lack of elegance would normally indicate Akio but no, it's a wild and agitated Hakuji.

What a nice surprise!

Or not.

But here you are, already forgotten what the hell he just asked you because of the inner monologue that explained what brought you to this point.

You can only stare at Hakuji and hopefully seem as if you only get lost in his beautiful blue eyes instead of the very truth that you paid no attention to his rant at all.

“Are you even listening?” He asks while still staring at you, and you blink twice. Then the other times.

"Um..." You finally manage to mumble. "Have I ever told you that you have stunning eyes?”

Wow. Smooth, really smooth, and extremely stupid.

"Are you serious?" He growls.

“They are mesmerizing?” You try again, and once again your ability to face uncomfortable situations is nonexistent.

Hakuji is now glaring at you, ready to pounce and beat some sense into the waste of space that you call your brain. Yeah, he was actually mad. Well, he has every right to be. After all, you're basically running away and leaving him behind.

You have no idea how long Hakuji stares at you; all you know is that there is a fire in his eyes and you can feel goosebumps crawling up your spine. His gaze seems to bore through you, and it's like every pore on your skin is suddenly filled with hot lava.

You cast your eyes down, unable to meet his gaze as he closes the distance between the two of you, coming so close you swear he will hear how quickly your heart beats against your chest. There's again the cowardly urge to run, crawl, hide, anything and everything besides facing him.

You've already done it once but you are sure that this time you cannot simply vanish into the night and never bring up the issue again.

No sir, this time you will have to face him and explain yourself.

Well. Sort of.

“Look," You say and clear your throat, trying to regain your composure. "I'm sorry for making this decision without talking with you about it first but well it's something I have to do. I was thinking about this for a while now and—"

"And you wanted to avoid discussing this issue with me again? Do you even have any idea how you hurt my feelings with that or do you just don't care?" He interrupts, and you blink. "You did not even have the courtesy to tell me that you plan on taking a job and leaving me behind!”

He is standing there, fists clenched, voice trembling, and looking more furious than you have ever seen him. You feel cold despite the warm night. There is so much hurt in his words, pain, anger, frustration, desperation, loneliness, all the things you would never wish upon him.

“I am not abandoning you. We are coming back after the job is done!” You protest and he just snarls at you.

“You have no way to know that! You are going to be gone for months or even goddam years. While I will be left alone here, maybe you will come back or you could be long dead, and I would never even f*cking know!”

He yells and you are suddenly aware of the fact that you are shaking, your hands clenching and unclenching, and that the blanket slipped down halfway to your waist while you were busy gaping at Hakuji.

“I will come back! I promise, no matter what, I'll be home in a year. Or even a few months. Whatever, I'm coming back.” You whisper, not sure if you should shout or cry or try to sound quirky or some sh*t but in the end, you choose to keep it to a low whisper.

"Even if you promise that you don't know what might happen!" His answer makes your throat tightens around the lump forming there.

Your nose crinkles at that. You're almost a hundred percent sure that you will come back. You are a big girl and there's no way that some low demon could take your life– Well, uh, scratch that, that nasty phantom pain ran through your arm, reminding you of a tiny embarrassing detail.

So, there's no way that a low demon could take your life in the condition you are now! Without the burden of a mark, and without Muzan being hot and bothered about your blood.

And there's a good chance that Michikatsu if you and Akio stumble upon him, will not kill you at first sight! Well, if he even remembers you at all.

It will not be a problem, definitely.

Haha.

Ugh, but of course, you are going to come back! It's just a matter of time, really.

There's just no way you can tell Hakuji exactly that, he would go absolutely bananas at that. He's already going absolute apesh*t about the whole situation without the horrendous knowledge about man-eating demons, or that you are in search of said monster of the night that ironically may be his future colleague that will annihilate his ass in a Blood Battle.

You can’t say that, not really, so you need a better excuse and you're rambling again.

Internally.

With yourself.

f*ck, you really need to get a grip on yourself and start spouting some bullsh*t excuses, “I am sorry. I should have told you, but it's a bit more complicated than that. This job is such a good opportunity for all of us. Akio and I will earn so much money for such little work, and we all could be financially stable for maybe years or even decades!

I know we have enough right now, but someday it's gonna be gone. But with this one job, we can buy a house or even build one, and we don't have to worry about doing odd jobs anymore, and one day you all want to get married to someone and that's also gonna be expensive!”

"What the f*ck?" He asks, voice barely above a whisper.

“Why can't you see how great this opportunity is? I mean, look at it from my perspective! We both know that nobody wants Akio if we do not bribe some poor girl. So what's a year being gone compared to having many years of stability? Plus we cannot solely rely on Keizo-san for the rest of our lives when our money is gone.”

You continue to ramble on and on, trying to convince him that you are only thinking of the best interest of all of you, and maybe a part of you is trying to convince yourself. That you're also doing this because of these reasons and not for your own selfish interest.

“And I promise you, no I swear I will come back alive and when I am back we can go wherever we want, do whatever we want! Besides it's not like Akio would sell me for rice corn or something. He can be dependable if he wants to be but I need someone who is always dependable to protect Keizo-san and Koyuki-chan! That scum from next door is too suspicious and they would totally poison the well you know?”

While you were talking, you never even noticed that you went to grab his hands and pull him down to you, nor did you notice that his body is now so close to yours that you could feel the heat coming off of him.

It was like an electric current ran through you, causing a small spark that caused you to tremble and almost jump out of your skin when you feel his hands on your shoulders, squeezing them to stop you from rambling. Hope burns in your chest for a second as Hakuji’s eyes remain trained on you.

His icy eyes gaze into yours with intensity, trying to read into your very soul. You fidget nervously, the thoughts crawling on the edge of your mind and for a moment you are afraid that he might realize that you have ulterior motives, that he can see through your lies.

But then one of his hands moves to your neck, his fingers curl around the back and he pulls you closer. He takes a little breath, parting his lips to say something, "I don't care about the money."

There's silence and you can only blink at him again.

So we forget about the whole protecting thing and focus on the money? Alright and what the f*ck are you supposed to do? What the f*ck are you supposed to say now? That you very much care about it and only because he doesn't everyone else also shouldn't or what?

A spark of anger flashes through your body, lips pursed into a scowl. Unnecessary anger, by all means, you have no right to be mad, he does. Yet, it doesn't change the irritation you feel that he doesn't want to understand your half-truths.

As if sensing your apprehension, he shakes his head slowly, looking at you surprisingly gently for someone who was super mad at you just a few seconds ago.

"I really couldn't care less about money, and I don't think that they need my protection," He repeats the words more forcefully as if you didn’t understand him the first time, and this time he does actually add your very good point, "But I do care about you, so much, and I trust that you can make it back alive and well, but can't you understand how I feel?"

You deflate a bit and lower your gaze, he says it so softly and with such gentleness that you cannot argue with him anymore, especially not when his thumb strokes against your cheek, making it hard to breathe, but Hakuji doesn’t stop, going for the last, lethal hit. Forgetting all about his Tsundere tendency that he sometimes has.

"I want to live with you, I want to grow old and someday die with you. There’s no future I could possible imaging without you by my side," Hakuji says those words in a low, gentle voice, but his words cut deep inside your heart, like a blade cutting through flesh, "But you're going to be gone, leaving me alone, for many months or years and I cannot protect you when you're gone, and even thinking of the slightest possibility that you could die and I wasn't there to prevent that drives me crazy."

A sense of deja vu is slapping you across your face, this situation, this conversation is so familiar yet so different. It is as if history was repeating itself. It feels too familiar. Too painful.

His words are hurting you. Hurting you because it was also a talk about your future in your room, just with someone different, in a different era. Hurt because it hits home so f*cking hard that it feels as though his words are a physical blow.

Instead of blue eyes, again, you see maroon-colored ones, and the sight hits you like an avalanche. An avalanche of guilt, pain, and confusion. All the emotions you tried to keep in check just come crashing down and overwhelm you.

Why, f*ck, just why do you have to think about him, see him, when Hakuji is so being entirely honest with you? He doesn't stop you from going, he's willing to support you in whatever endeavor you wish to undertake and he will be waiting for you at the end.

The way you said 'We will stay together, right? Like always,' as if it was a thing that could happen as if it were the most natural thing in the world. And how he answered 'Yes, we will, for as long as we can,' as if staying together was something that would happen for certain, that having a future together was a fact, the absolute undeniable truth.

Only a year later you were dead.

And you still think about that other person, about those stupid regrets that never went away, that you never quite got over. About how you f*cked up. About how it must have hurt him. And you feel guilty for hurting him, for leaving him there.

To continue to live for so many decades without his brother and without you.

Akio may be right that right now you don't know what exactly you want from this life, but you don't want to make the same mistake again. To regret yet again, this time with Hakuji, and to hurt him for no reason but your own f*cking fears.

"Hakuji, when Akio and I, no, when I am back,” You stop for a moment because you are not sure if you should say it or not. Ah, f*ck it, you think to yourself, why should you not? It's Hakuji you're talking to, the man who has no problems telling you what he feels, "Let's get married.”

His breath catches and you freeze where you sit, you can feel the blood rushing to your cheeks, your heart thudding wildly in your chest. His lips part just a bit like he might have been planning to say something, but no words escape his lips and he just looks at you.

Instead, his lips are now pressed tightly together, jaw clenched tight enough for his teeth to grind against each other and you start to panic because you haven't even thought of the possibility that maybe he doesn't want to marry you anymore.

But. But. But. He said he wants to grow old with you, which doesn't have to mean in that sense, you can also want that with a friend, or more like someone who you consider family.

f*ck, maybe he really changed his mind already because let's be honest, the idea that one day he may not want to anymore was very real. After seeing how damn cute and adorable and loveable Koyuki is, you too would reconsider your options. You couldn't even be mad if that's the case.

Idiot.

You are an idiot.

He blinks at you, again and again, while his face turns redder and redder as he realizes what you have said. You feel the heat in your own face rise a few degrees, but the blush in your cheeks is nothing compared to the flaming redness that spreads on his own.

Shaking his head at you quickly, his lips curve into a slight smile that he hides as soon as it forms on his face. You're not sure if it's a grimace or a smirk, but you start babbling yet again.

"I-I, ah—" Your tongue feels thick in your mouth, "I mean, of course only if you still want to when I am back. Or if you even want it at all? f*ck, sorry, I shouldn't have assumed! It's totally ok if you don't want to anymore, haha. Just uh, forget I said—"

Hakuji's hand on your face stops you from finishing your sentence.

"Why don't you ever shut up?" His thumb brushes over your lower lip, and then before you even have the chance to comprehend what is happening, he abruptly pushes you backward. You're falling back into the softness of your futon with Hakuji atop of you, his hands beside your head.

You bite down on your lip as you once more look up at him, eyes wide in surprise. Hakuji is not the type to back down from anything but you had never imagined that he would do such a thing, nor did you think he was capable of doing such a bold move. Well, now you know better.

"You should know by now that I want to marry you," He says, his voice low, but it carries across the room. It echoes through your bones, causing your heart to beat faster and your skin to tingle. "I've told you before, haven't I?"

The way he said it with such conviction, you cannot help but feel like an idiot for even considering the option that he may have changed his mind. But, but, you have to say something, explain yourself! You can't just lay here like a dumbass staring at him.

"I didn't think you really meant it, so I didn't–"

He doesn't let you finish, "I have every intention of marrying you. I always have."

A flicker of hope flares in your chest.

A feeling you thought was lost forever, yet he has brought it back to life. The same feeling that made you believe in the future, one where you're going to be happy, where you are not plagued by the inevitable. The one feeling that made you want to live, that someday you do not see that haunting red anymore but instead this captivating blue.

Blue, blue, blue, and not red.

So beautiful, so lovely, so breathtakingly wonderful. Such a blue that you feel like you are drowning and it's right here, in front of you, right now. A blue that could tell tales of the sky, clearer than any sea could ever dream of, and more precious than any gem.

Clear blue eyes that seem to be so fond, so adoring of you, as they stare down at you. You fight back the tears, the ones you have no idea if they are caused by joy or sadness, you don't care. You can't find your voice or your breath because his touch is too much for your heart.

Too much for your soul.

You're starting to drown in a sea of his feelings for you, in a sea of a love that is so pure and true and so full of promise that you can barely breathe for wanting it so badly and you are dying inside, a little bit, every single time he touches you, his fingers sliding over your cheekbones, his thumb tracing the curve of your ear, his nose brushing against yours, his lips so close to yours.

“Please, say it again." You need to hear those words spoken aloud, because it makes everything real, makes it real and possible, making you believe that someday, it may all come true. Your hands move up slowly, cupping the sides of his face, as you plead, "That you will marry me when I come home."

His gaze moves from your face, down to your lips. His eyes burn brighter than they already do and there is an ache in his heart, as he sees how much you want him to say it. How much you wish to hear these words spoken. And it's so strange to see someone so unafraid of the world suddenly become so fearful.

You are not a person who is showing any vulnerability, but right now you do and for him, it is such a rare sight to behold. In a way, it is as if you are giving him a glimpse of a side of you that is so secret, so hidden, that you never revealed it to anyone.

A side that you are afraid to show because it makes you weak, but to him, it's something so beautiful, that only he ever gets to witness.

He leans closer until his lips are just a breath from yours. He cups the back of your head with his other hand, pulling you against him. And when he does, he smiles, because he has been waiting for this moment for so long, for so long, "I will marry you, [Name]."

It is all you need to hear.

You close your eyes for a moment, basking in the warmth and the comfort of his hand on your face, even if it's not tomorrow, next month, or even in a year. Still, you cling to it his words, like a life preserver that is going to keep you afloat for a lifetime that is about to begin because Hakuji says he will marry you.

And with that, his fingers press firmly onto your cheekbone and he is kissing you. There is no hesitation, no holding back. No fear.

Only him, only you, so softly, so sweetly, so tenderly, that you lose yourself in that kiss, letting yourself be swept away on a wave of sensation that you never knew existed.

It is intoxicating, it is dizzying, it is so overwhelming, and you can only cling to him, to that kiss as tightly as you can. Trying to keep him closer, because you do not want to lose this moment. Not because it is right now or this is the perfect time, but because this is it.

This is the future you want to live in.

The future that you have wanted, and never got the chance to experience.

But now you are living it, right now, at this moment. And it seems so right, so pure and true, as his mouth moves across your own, as he kisses you as if he knows what you longed for all this time, how you want him to do this to you. How you want to feel those lips against your own, how you want to press your body against his, feel his heart beating against yours.

Because to you, this is a moment so precious that it could never be taken back, even if you try to, you will always carry this moment with you. A moment you can never forget. A moment that cannot be taken from you.

And when Hakuji slowly pulls away, leaving a trail of kisses across your neck, your cheeks, your forehead, you open your eyes, still holding onto him for dear life.

You feel his fingers in your hair, tugging at the strands as he stares down at you, looking at you with an expression you have never seen on his face before as if he wants to memorize every inch of your face. The way you are looking up at him, the way you are gazing into his eyes.

He leans closer, pressing his forehead against yours, and then he whispers, "Say it back."

"I will marry you," You say, without thinking, without hesitation, without any doubt. Because it's all there, all in front of you. A promise to come, a hope that never left you alone, and a future where everything will be alright.

Hakuji smiles as you look up at him, your hands cupping his face, pulling him down closer. With that, he kisses you again, and once more, he makes sure that you do not forget this moment, this kiss, this touch, this promise. He wants to imprint it upon you forever.

You pull away from his lips, having the need to breathe and look at him. A tear rolls down your cheek, because his eyes are blue and not red but you don't care.

It doesn't matter. Because this is real and he's here, in your arms.

— And alive.

So far, your first few months as a full-time Demon Slayer well, you don't wanna say they sucked but they did.

Surprisingly, it has nothing to do with the notion of slaying demons, or that slowly but surely your arms are adoring new sets of scars. Alright, the demons were on the duller side, and by now they openly show a strong dislike towards you. Be it either that your blood turns them into mindless hungry mutts or that Akio and you simply do not take their existence or slaying them seriously, is a mystery never to be solved.

But if you have to guess it is the latter since their last words are always a string of curses and insults while the last thing they hear and see is mocking faces and laughter that sounds too cheery for this kind of work. As if you two didn't just slaughter a living being and in Akio’s case eat one that was still alive while you are watching and asking unnecessary questions. Of course, only when there isn't a human to witness this ungraceful act.

They hate you both, no, they loathe your very existence.

It is a fact that they cannot hide the sheer amount of disgust and anxiety at the sight of either you or god forbid both of you at once. This actually made you question if demons gossip amongst each other, or if it is just their instinct telling them that Akio and you are bad news at this point.

This honestly does not change the fact that the demons in this era are boring. You haven't encountered any memorable Blood Demon Art, or a demon so beautiful or so grotesque that you had a double take. Just some even dared to spout some nonsense and excuse going in the direction of 'I am not hurting any humans, I feed on animals or corpses. You have the wrong one'.

Yeah, sure you do Edward Cullen.

Since there are so few Demon Slayers the payment for each mission really made you swallow hard. Earning money has never been this easy. At this rate, you can live for a couple of decades comfortably.

So, despite whiny demons, your new interest in demonology which is going nowhere, and living in the uncomfortable wilderness again, doing your job has not been much of a problem for you.

The problem, like always, was humans, the survivors, the people haunted by sins committed just before their eyes, were never grateful to you.

Instead of a simple 'Thank you', it is always a 'Why didn't you come sooner?'. Instead of relief and gratefulness, it is loathing and anger. You see it all in their dark, broken eyes. The shine only comes back to curse you out, to throw rocks at you or simply hitting against you.

At first, you've been shocked, utterly confused, and question yourself, but over time, it became so normal that you don’t remember the last time somebody thanked you. It's no secret that humans are soft, fragile beings. Also that they are egotistical, awful beings, just wearing the mask of innocence.

But have people always been like this, was it the same in the previous era? Or is it quite simple human nature?

You don't remember, you simply tell yourself that you don't need their empty gratefulness. And who are you to tell anyone what they should feel, Hakuji too saved your life and your gratitude came in the form of violence.

So let these people blame you for their misfortune, let them be blind to the bitter fact they were just at the wrong place at the wrong time. No higher power decided that this should happen to them, it was not a punishment from heaven. No, they were just unfortunate to encounter them but were blessed enough to survive while a hundred others fell victim to this cataclysm.

This shouldn't shake your faith in humanity; it is such a petty thing to focus on. It isn't fair to think about a wishful spark of gratitude when every day more victims fall prey to demons. You tell yourself that you do not care, you are trying desperately to no care.

You keep repeating that until the voices become distant whispers until the misdirected violence does not hurt anymore. And with Akio by your side, everything seems less complicated. It makes it easier to ignore these thoughts because his presence alone could calm your inner chaos. He would smile, laugh, make jokes, and talk about anything he feels like giving you not even the room to feel bitter.

It is the unshakable fact that eliminating one demon will save a dozen if not more lives. That truth has always kept you moving no matter how much it aches to endure their anger. So when did it begin that you stopped caring, when did you stop looking at the world through rose-tinted glasses?

When did you start looking at humans the same way as you did at demons?

Looking back at it, it must have been when Akio and you have been summoned to a meeting with the head of the Ubuyashiki Family, the Oyakata-sama of the present era, the venerable leader of the Demon Slayer corps.

The sun is as merciless as ever where sweat trickles down your forehead without pause and then parred with the warm wind that blows around your hair making your body heat up even more under your clothes making you very much want to die.

You're as dramatic as ever, but you cannot find yourself caring to acknowledge your petty mindset when you have been traveling without a pause in this severe weather while sleep was upgraded to be a luxus now.

So here you are, barely having the strength to be standing in the yard of the Demon Slayer headquarters on one of the hottest days of the year while drenched in sweat because it is midday and the sun does not care if you are on the edge of having a heatstroke or not.

And apparently, the calm and caring Oyakata-sama also does not give a single f*ck about your or Akio's condition. You fight back curses that are on the tip of your tongue, there is an acid in your mouth, wanting to be released while you both wait for the leader to appear.

But you can't because Akio must have it much worse than you right now. In his veins still flows a bit of demonic blood, so standing in the blazing sun must feel as if he's burning alive. But he isn't complaining, so you can't whine otherwise he's gonna tell you what a baby you are.

From where you are standing, you can see the Ubuyshiki children patiently waiting in the spacious tatami room near the sliding doors. Not minding the heat at all, either they are oscar worthy actors or it is significantly more comfortable inside.

This brings up the question, why can't they just let you wait, you don't know, inside? Where it is more comfortable and not quite literally hell's kitchen? You are just two people, and from the size of the tatami room, you can conclude with your two functioning brain cells that aren't burnt to the crisp that at least forty people could fit inside.

Do they, perhaps, want you to suffer? Get you tinfoil, this smells like a conspiracy.

Or it is just your bad mood speaking, it probably is, isn't it? There is no way this family could possibly be filled with rude assholes. Huh, wait, nobody is actually hindering you from waiting inside. Who is gonna stop you? These two creepy ten-year-old girls who are staring into the depths of your soul? Jokes on them, you would kick a child in the face for a mochi.

As stealthy as your pitiful state can allow, you whisper to Akio, "Hey, so, why do we wait—"

The twins from The Shining had different plans as they rudely interrupt your best idea this week with their shouting, "Oyakata-sama has arrived!"

The reaction of Akio and you are not as quick as you would think it would be, it's delayed, even more so when you realize that you have to actually kneel. But you both do since there is no way you can show any disrespect towards the person who dedicated their lives to the greater course and endured the horrendous curse that befall his family.

You bow deeply and remain bowed until Oyakata-sama speaks first, "I apologize for keeping you waiting, my brave swordsmen.”

The way he speaks is fluid and gentle, just from this one sentence you can tell that the tone of his voice has a soothing effect on his peers. Making them feel at ease and willing to attend to what he has to say.

It's weird, his voice should make you feel more relaxed, but instead of the predicted result, goosebumps raise on your skin. Maybe it's just your nervousness or the whole situation in general, that doesn't allow you to relax.

"The weather seems to be particularly nice today, isn't it? If I'm correct, it will get much hotter later in the day." He chuckles softly and the twins help him to sit down, "But I am pleased to see you both in good health."

You blink at his statement. Nice weather? Good health? It is a miracle that none of you collapse due to the work and weather conditions. You cannot put your finger on it, but there's just something about this honorable Oyakata-sama that wants to make you roll your eyes and scoff.

The conclusion? That this is one of the infamous cases where you simply don't like someone and there's no deep reason behind it because so far, things seem normal enough.

"Master, it is good to see you so healthy. I pray for it to not change in the future." Despite his words, Akio looks like he wanted to agree with your weird mood by giving you a glance before shaking his head slightly in order to signal that you needn't worry.

And you are thankful that he does the greeting instead of you since you would really hate for Oyakata-sama to take notice of how awkwardly you handle his presence. Yes, you are aware that your behavior sounds extremely offensive, but sometimes your nerves just won't keep quiet.

"Thank you, Akio, I am grateful to hear that," Oyakata-sama says after a slight sigh, which makes you wonder why he sighed at all, "It is such a shame that your family cannot appreciate such a great asset to the organization such as you."

His statement seems to hang heavily over your head, heavy enough to crush every bone in your neck. What sounds like praise or compliment to everyone else, everyone present knows that Akio loathes hearing anything related to his family or being reminded of them.

Just a few weeks ago Akio revealed to you that he's the black sheep of the family. Simple because of his ability to consume demons and use it to his advantage and since he does not stop they abandoned him, saying they have no member in the prestigious Rengoku lineage with such a disgusting ability.

You glance sideways at Akio, whose gaze hasn't left the ground between his knees, looking at the tips of his toes. His demeanor is far better than yours, if someone would purposely add salt to your insecurities like that you would not know if you could ever be as calm as him. Particularly not when it is by someone you are supposed to respect. You would cry, yeah, or go nuts.

“Of course, I am also grateful to finally meet you, Ōzora [Name]. It was quite amusing to hear how you became a member.” Despite his words, there's no amusem*nt present in his tone, “Stealing a sword from one of my brave swordsmen, it makes me wonder why not use the method everyone else did?”

How are you supposed the answer? You don't have a single clue about what he considers the normal method, so you simply say, “My apology for stealing it, I am sure I have caused you and the young man much inconvenience. ”

"Thanks to the inconvenience, I now have a very talented female swordsman in our organization- Also, I'm sure the young man wouldn't have survived the next missions anyway, so he wouldn't have needed the sword anymore," Oyakata-sama explains with a smile, "Someone from the Ozora clan is worth more in this case."

What? Did you just mishear the whole statement?

Your head snaps up immediately and bends over slightly due to the strain on your neck. Your eyes instantly fall on him, his face donning an easy smile, the one which doesn’t put you at ease or helps you breathe easier.

He looks exactly like every Ubuyashiki that you know of, black hair that must reach his lower back, pale skin which is slowly taken over by the curse and everything else seems fine except for the haughtiness, almost arrogantly eyes—the look of someone whose isn't gentle or caring.

Ah, now you know why it feels as if ants are crawling over your skin. He simply doesn't care about his subordinates, only about those who are especially useful in the long run.

"Can we ask why we have been called here?" Akio asks, his voice as neutral as possible, while you are still in the process to comprehend what nonsense this Oyakata-sama just said.

"Yes, unfortunately, two of our Hashira passed away recently. To be precise, the Flame Hashira and Wind Hashira," With those words the atmosphere changes drastically, almost as if it were sucked out of the room and replaced with ice cold air, "Their deaths are most regrettable, they died while doing what they swore to do."

It sounds a lot like they had the misfortune of running into either Michikatsu or even Muzan personally. In this generation, the whole organization is what you would call the epitome of strength.

"That is truly unfortunate," Akio replies with a nod, the tone in his voice nearly sounding more mocking, than sincere, "They will surely be remembered as heroes among us."

Surely not by Akio and you though. Akio will probably do a victory dance about the fact that his father or uncle or whatsoever is gone, and you do not even know the faces or names of these two, and apparently also not by him who's looking at you as if he has already forgotten the Flame and Wind Hashira because of his shiny new toys that are kneeling before him.

"Indeed they shall. However, these sudden losses leave their positions open. We must fill those empty spaces quickly before he takes advantage of the circ*mstances," Oyakata-sama states calmly and firmly, "Who would be more suitable than two talented swordsmen whose ancestors were already active in the Golden Age of our organization? That's why I am assigning you both to this position."

Hashira? You blink, Akio and you? That is not going to work, surely not. In no universe is Akio and you fit to be in such a high position. It comes with so many responsibilities which you cannot shoulder. Your only reason why you have been here in the first place is to find Michikatsu and then you will lay down your sword again.

No, you cannot become a Hashira. Not with your fragile mind and your wavering faith.

"I am honored that you think so highly of me, but I am far from being strong or worthy enough to fill the position as a pillar of this organization," You swallow hard before continuing, "So please forgive me that I refuse this offer."

Akio is quick to follow your statement, "I have to agree with [Name], we are not worthy enough for such an honor. I am sure. There are many more who have proven themselves."

"I understand but this is not a matter of whether you accept or not," His expression remains calm, but you sense the irritation hidden under his composed demeanor. "It's an order, not an offer.

The way he speaks makes you flinch inwardly and hold your breath, trying to avoid letting out your frustration. An order? You wish you could honestly tell him what you think about his stupid order. Where he can take it.

Forcing someone into a position they do not want to be in, speaking of his brave swordsmen as if they are nothing but tools. As if their lives are disposable. Crimson hues are in the corners of your vision, anger playing with your heartstrings, but you can control it.

Just pretend that you bow to his will, it is easier. You close your own mouth and bow your head low. "We humbly thank you for the honor and your confidence in us, Master."

"I am glad, besides this new position may help you find this demon that you are desperately searching for," Oyakata-sama answers without missing a beat, and it leaves you cold despite the burning heat, "I expect nothing less than perfect execution and utmost dedication from you two."

His words sound harsh, especially coming from someone who normally sounds like silk and honey. And with that Oyakata-sama rises from the floor and walks away without another word, leaving only silence behind him.

Slowly, you rise from your position, letting the breeze swirl your hair. The smallest of laughs reinvigorates your chest but it stops as abruptly as it started, "What a bitch."

"I'd go so far as calling him cruel," Akio mutters darkly, "No wonder this organization is on the verge of falling apart."

Akio walks towards the exit first, closely followed by you. Your shoulders slump forward and your steps drag, you still couldn't believe how arrogant and condescending that bastard was, yet he seemed to enjoy it.

"Well looks like fun time is over for us now," You state as nonchalantly as possible while feeling like ripping off the mask of politeness you're wearing and shattering its glass.

The fun time was indeed over.

From that point onwards, your life got worse and worsened. The moment you both completed a mission, you have been ushered towards the next with little to no breaks in between, and every mission brought more and more stress onto your body.

You felt like a walking corpse. A dead person carrying the soul of a living one inside his rotting shell, making sure the latter didn't escape. Even when you weren't fighting, you feel tired and drained, constantly exhausted, and often confused about whether the fatigue and exhaustion were real or imagined.

Every single day feels like it lasted for eternity and the worst part of it is, if you could die tomorrow and sleep forever, you might choose that option.

At this point, you wouldn't be surprised if the former Hashira died due to overworking instead of an impossible mission. In all honesty, it almost seems as if Akio and you are the only Demon Slayers that exist, or as if Oyakata-sama as the wish that you both eradicate every single demon that wanders this filthy world.

Even Akio is at his limit, he's becoming a bit more short-tempered every day, snapping at people around him who once again have not shown any gratitude. Normally he would simply ignore them and move on but not anymore.

It is starting to annoy him greatly. The lack of sleep, the verbal abuse, and the ever-increasing workload. Even the abominable soulless black eyes of the crows that survey your every move, who report back every single thing.

And then there is also the other issue, you've lost count of how long ago the nightmares began again. They happen frequently, and sometimes you wake up in tears or sweating through the sheets because of the intensity of the nightmare, but they never seem to end.

So, you and Akio started having a system to flee these inhuman conditions. While one of you is completing a mission, the other would get a good night's sleep, and somehow, through sheer determination, you both managed to fight on.

No matter how much pain you suffered or how badly you hurt yourself, you never stopped, never even for a second until that one mission.

It was your turn to finish it while Akio is somewhere nearby getting some rest. From the information that was provided by the feathery surveillance camera which by now you named Aniki, so Big Brother, it is an easy enough mission.

Children from the village have been missing and from experience, if a demon targets young vulnerable children it is not a powerful one. Since it has been only happening in one village, the hideout cannot be far, and sure enough, it was easy to find.

Outside of the village, you found a hut less than a ten-minute walk away, the smell of blood and decay was more than clear that you were in the right place. There wasn't any sign of struggle outside the house though, nothing out of the ordinary.

Inside however was a whole other story, it was a slaughterhouse, a glimpse of hell here on earth.

The stench of blood and decaying flesh hit you harder than usual. Blood is everywhere: spattered on walls and splattered all over the floors where most of the bodies lie; too many for you to count at first glance, all in different stages of decomposition. With some, you can just barely see that flesh is missing in different places, some drained until the last drop of blood.

If it weren't human bodies you would almost describe the scene as a garbage dump with the uneaten remains of some lavish feast.

Just down the corridor, you can see a girl who had obviously tried to run and scream before her throat has been slit. Her face frozen in horror as her mouth open wide in what should be a soundless cry as someone came rushing after her, and she bled out slowly, dying alone without anyone hearing her cries. Kneeling down beside her, a shiver goes down your spine, causing a cold sweat to drip off your skin.

The air suddenly chills around you as you realize there are no other wounds, just one slash across her neck. Your heart stops beating, this is too clean for a—

Oh.

It takes a few seconds for your mind to catch up and process the scene you're witnessing but it hits you hard and fast once you do for some reason, despite the sheer amount of disgust that floats your every pore, your body won't stop moving forward.

Forcing itself deeper inside this dark hell hole filled with the corpses of innocent souls. It isn't humanly possible for you to stay calm in here yet your entire being wants to go closer, want to see everything better— need to understand why.

It is the unshakable fact that eliminating one demon will save a dozen if not more lives. That truth has always kept you moving no matter how much it aches to endure everything. But you could not help wondering; just who is that you are saving?

A victim of unfortunate circ*mstances or a true devil disguised in human flesh?

In your false pretend of a heroic act you cannot help to oversee the obvious signs. The husband with a character too forceful, and his wife with bruises too advanced to come from the sudden demon attack. The parents emerge completely unscathed from the sudden onslaught while the children are covered with scratches and wounds.

And now a young child with a slit throat caused by a blunt blade? When all the other bodies have a clear indication of violence committed by a demon? The instant you start questioning the situation, your brain starts going through a thousand scenarios. Is this really solely the work of a demon?

With a firm grip, pull your blade out of the sheath hanging at your waist, feeling its familiar weight against your palm, giving you confidence. There is a trail of blood drops leading farther into the darkness beyond this room and your steps follow the path, leaving behind wet footsteps as you tread further in, and as soon as you enter the room your stomach starts turning upside down.

Another child's lifeless figure lies motionlessly on top of a broken table, covered entirely in cuts, deep gashes cut into their chest and torso area.

He doesn't even look older than eight years old, his sightless glassy eyes staring up at you with empty emptiness and blood oozing from every wound. Each gash went straight through the rib cage and pierced through the front, tearing apart lungs and organs.

And again, his neck is slashed open.

A freezing brisk crawls into your veins, poisoning your bloodstream with venom, and seeping into your blood and bones. this cold swallow every fiber of your body until it arrives at the core of your being, ready to tear even the last piece of your heart apart. There are no words you can say to give you comfort. In this moment your knees buckle under the weight of reality.

This boy must've been screaming bloody murder as he was dragged in here before finally succumbing to his fate. You know the feeling of utter despair, the certainty that your demise would come painfully, and the despair of realizing that there is nothing you could do to prevent it—

And these children who haven't even experienced their life yet, whose future is still ahead of them, must have felt it.

You can't keep standing, your legs are trembling, threatening to collapse beneath your own weight, but you have to move on, you have to eliminate the threat. And so you continue following the trail, stepping over the dead bodies lying along the way, stepping over countless lost futures. All of those precious possibilities were stolen away and for what?

You don't know and yet you step into the last room.

Another body sprawled on the ground, but unlike the others, its limbs aren't twisted awkwardly nor are there any visible cuts or holes, except for a small pool of blood that formed around the corpse's head and beside the body, sitting nonchalantly a woman.

Long black hair, pale white skin, a pale blue kimono, and if it weren't for the blood all over her and the cat-like pupils adoring her green eyes, you'd swear you could have mistaken her for another victim. But her indifference and boredom she displays while gazing at the dead child.

"Are you finally back? What took you so—" She says casually before looking towards you. The boredom morphs into surprise and fear, tears gathering at the corner of her eyes as she realizes that you are the one who will kill her now, "Wait! Please, I beg you! I am not the one who killed them I only—"

Before finishing speaking, your blade slices across her neck, and a splash of crimson appears on her clothing. There is even a need for you to use any of your Breathing Techniques, something as low as she does not even deserve to witness something as beautiful as this shortly before her demise.

The blood dribbles down onto the floor, mixing with dirt and bits of straw, forming a red puddle underneath her body. She falls backward, falling limp and silent. Her lips parted slightly, exposing sharp teeth stained with fresh blood and her head falls with onto the dirty ground with a dull thud.

"But why?! I did not kill any of them, he did it! I did nothing wrong!" Pathetic excuses spin through this demon's lips with an equal manner of frenzy and fear, blood shooting through the irises of her eye. The conflicting emotions radiate from her as her head slowly develops into ashes, "It is his fault, I never forced him to kill any of them, so why—"

Ridiculous. Do you really have to listen to her screams? Gods, you wish she would just shut the f*ck up, you don’t have any patience left for this.

"I believe you but I don't care. No amount of begging could have saved you anyway," As you take hold of the katana's handle, wiping the blood from the blade and returning the sword to its scabbard, "Stop being so pathetic and just die already."

Coldly, you observe her as your feet halt on top of her skull, and something ugly swirls in her eyes at the motion, making her grit her teeth, "But why!? Why am I not allowed to live?! What about him?!"

"Because you had the misfortunate that I am the one who decided whether you live or not. Though don't worry he will join you in hell shortly,"

With that, you stomp onto the weeping head, hasting the process of her end and finally, the annoying wailing stops altogether. It feels good when the noise ends like you got rid of an irritating fly that buzzed incessantly throughout the day.

Your thoughts are interrupted abruptly when something catches your eye behind you, a flash of light reflected into the corner of your vision. You turn around, praying to see another demon charging in at you with fangs bared and claws outstretched but instead, you see a cruel joke.

A man, so unmistakenly human with messy black hair and so much rage in his black tears-filled eyes. A blunt knife in his hand, aiming for your chest— aiming to give you suffering and slow death.

A chuckle almost escapes you, the images of all these children and their slit throats echo in your head, again and again. The image of a crying child clutching the severed hands of a friend, while this human is kneeling above them, enjoying their suffering as he—

Disgusting. So utterly disgusting, you cannot comprehend it. A human, how sick. This scum created this hellhole?

You swing your leg at his wrist, deflecting his attack, and knocking the weapon aside as it strikes the wall. His expression twists with confusion and pain as you grab him by the collar, dragging him close to your face, snarling as you stare directly into his eyes, "Are you the f*cker this pathetic bitch was talking about? The one who did all this?"

His eyes widen and his voice cracks when he screams, his split flying everywhere "Don't call her that you bitch! How could you?! Why the f*ck did you kill her?! You knew she didn't do anything, right?! She was innocent!!"

His raging gaze looks so pathetic, you can hardly contain yourself anymore, the anger rising within you, burning bright. The fury consumes you, pushing out whatever feelings you had left.

"What the f*ck did you just say? Innocent? Are delusional or just f*cking stupid? Do you even realize in your f*cked up brain what you have done?" The hand that gripped his collar is now around his neck, gripping tighter and tighter and it is only thanks to the Constant Breathing that you do even have the upper hand, "You slaughtered innocent children for f*cks sake! With a blunt knife! Blunt! Do you even know how much these children suffered and for what? Tell me, you sick f*ck, tell me why?!”

He struggles to breathe as you tighten your grip around his neck, squeezing ever harder. Your voice grows stronger with each word until finally, it echoes loudly enough to fill every crevice of this dark house, and the sound resonates through the air and the walls, "Why did you do it? Tell me why! Was it for fun? Did you enjoy killing them? Did you get off while watching them scream and beg?!”

His eyes dart around, desperately trying to find something else to focus on, anywhere but your terrifying countenance. He tries to speak but fails because you squeeze even more. His mouth opens and closes repeatedly, attempting to form sounds but none come forth. Your hand is starting to ache from squeezing his neck.

“I– I had no choice! I love her, I did it for her!” He cries and continues, pleading, "What choice did I have? Without these children to eat from she would have died, I would have lost her!”

Love?

The world goes silent as you loosen your fingers and let the bastard fall to his knees. Did he say he did it for love? For love? What kind of sick sh*t was this? Love? You think to yourself. No way in hell could that be true. This man has gone insane. But still, you must be sure.

"Are you joking?" you whisper, shaking your head as if you're having trouble processing everything that has happened since you came inside this house, "You are telling me you did all that for love?”

The man shakes his head rapidly, his eyes glued to the floor as he mumbles, "Yes– yes, I loved her, please understand–"

It can't be true. Not love. If love could make someone do such things then love itself should not exist, it should be abolished, burned, erased from history, banished from existence entirely. And yet, there is something about this man's voice that makes you pause, that makes you consider.

Love never made you ever consider doing anything so depraved or despicable, and yet here you stand, considering whether or not it might actually be possible. Love is supposed to be sacred; it is the one thing that binds us together. It is the one thing that makes us care for others and wants the best for their lives, regardless of who they are or what they may be capable of doing to us. Love is supposed to protect those we care about, and yet somehow, in some twisted, warped, psychotic way, this man seems to believe love gave him the right to murder helpless children.

No. No. That cannot be right. You shake your head again, dismissing the idea of love altogether, and continue, "If you loved her then why didn't you take her life instead? Or better use your own body to satisfy her animalistic hunger?"

A small part of you almost wishes he had done exactly that. If he had chosen death over love, then at least he would not have thrown away his humanity, he wouldn't have become an abomination, he would have been free, and you would not feel disgusted when looking upon him. Yet, even though you wish it were so, it simply could not be so. This man killed innocent children out of love.

"I- I couldn't!" He whispers, "I didn't want to lose her but she didn't want to kill either, not become a monster so I did what I thought necessary to keep her by my side."

That does not sound like love, that sounds like obsession and possession. He loves her too much, he cares for her too deeply, he thinks of her constantly, and fears losing her more than he fears becoming the worst possible being wandering this earth, and yet, there is something about his words that you cannot deny.

Something that makes you wonder if perhaps, just maybe, if you have ever been forced in his position if you had loved someone so intensely, so profoundly, you would have acted just like this man? There is something about this man's face, something about the tone of his voice, that makes you question the very nature of love, its worth, its meaning.

Would you have done the same for Yoriichi? Or for Hakuji? Perhaps. Maybe. Certainly not. And yet, the possibility remains. But no, no. Impossible. There is no way in hell you would ever kill innocent children to save another person you cared for, no matter how much you loved them. You would die before you even considered such a terrible act, and yet, the possibilities remain, and your thoughts grow darker. And darker.

Your mind wanders back to the scene you witnessed outside, the image of those poor, defenseless children, dead and lying in pools of blood, the bodies strewn across the ground. They were innocent, pure, unblemished, and now they lay dead at the hands of a madman. Their faces contorted in agony, the stench of death lingering in the air.

Yoriichi nor Hakuji would ever ask you to do anything of the sort. They would never force you to commit such atrocities against innocent people. Yoriichi loved this world in every single way, he found it a blessing to be even born, and Hakuji loved the world despite what it had done to him. Even if they tried to convince you otherwise, they would never suggest you go against your conscience and morals. In fact, the two of them would most likely turn on you before you ever even took a step toward committing such a heinous crime.

The once-burning anger turns into something unfamiliar, into something sharp and cold. It freezes all of the emotions leaving only pure hatred and disgust running through your veins. A repulsive fury, an intense madness. It's all that is left in you and feeling that being like that at this very moment, is almost alarming. You can't help but think that you should slaughter the man before you. Not just talk about it but truly kill him. As slow and as painful as he did with the children. It's such a powerful, terrifying thought.

You place both hands against his cheek, shoving his face upward and staring into the eyes of this monster, who was just a few moments ago still human to you. You want to gauge them out and crush them under your feet.

"Repeat it," you demand, "Look into my eyes and tell me you did all that for something as absurd as love. That you killed children, watched as she ripped apart their flesh and feasted on them as if these are not just innocent children but some roasted pigs simply for love."

The man nods slowly, "Yes, I did it for her."

He believes it. You know it must be true. You look deep inside his eyes and see only devotion, only devotion to a woman who he loved and feared to lose. He loved her and he did whatever it took to keep her alive and happy. He did it because he loved her.

The next moment a terrifying calmness washes over you, replacing your previous insanity. You are calm when you grab his messy hair, and you are calm as you drag him through this slaughterhouse. Through the many corpses scattered along the way. Through the piles of bones and torn organs and broken spines.

His screams and pleas fall onto your deaf ears, the thought ringing through your head is the word love. His reason for countless destroyed futures, his reason for so much misery and anguish, his reason for the grieving families who will never know what happened to their own flesh and blood.

You stop at the entrance, where you encountered the pile of bodies, the ones he has thrown here as if they are garbage, and now you forcing him to look at the sight before him, forcing him to recognize the reality of his actions. He gasps, holding his breath as though afraid of breathing in this stench that permeates his lungs.

You force him to look at what awaits him.

"Look at what you did for your so-called love. They wanted to be alive, to grow old, to experience the future. Yet you denied them all those things. You murdered them as if they were nothing more than cattle, mere food. And you expect me to let you live because you did it for love?" You press his face closer to the piled remains of the young children, “I refuse to accept this excuse of yours, I refuse to accept the fact that you are even human. You made yourself a monster, became evil incarnate, an animal without humanity."

"But...but I didn't..." The man whimpers pitifully, struggling weakly against your grasp as tears stream from his eyes, "I'm sorry… I couldn't help myself. I had to make her happy."

“I don't give two sh*ts about your reasons anymore, you chose this,” You push his face deeper into the mess, ignoring his pleas and desperate yelping, "If there is anything to blame for your current state then surely it rests upon your shoulders alone. You are a demon, you turned into a monster, a beast."

He begins convulsing violently, his whole body wracked by tremors and spasms that seem to run through his entire frame. It takes effort, but somehow you manage to keep his face buried deep into the bloody pile, ensuring that his last view is exactly as you want him to remember it forevermore: a scene of carnage and horror.

“And I as an honorable and earnest member of the Demon Slayer will put a final end to your wretched existence," you snarl, "Because this is what I swore to do. To purge this land of the vicious demons and protect humans."

The words ring true in your ears as you raise your arm high, drawing the long blue-tinted sword from your scabbard. There is no hesitation in your movements, no doubt whatsoever as you thrust downwards into his back, driving the blade forward, piercing the skin between his shoulder blades. You pull the sword outward sharply, ripping open his flesh in the process, sending his spine and innards exposed.

Blood spurts from the wound, coating the ground beneath you, and his screaming intensifies. He writhes and thrashes, trying desperately to get away, to escape the pain.

It doesn't work, and yet, he does not die, only his shriek pierces your ears. An awful sound, full of terror and agony. The same sounds he must have heard whenever he brought back one of his victims. A scream which always accompanies death. You feel no guilt or shame as he falls limp at your feet, just staring down at the man, who twitches and writhes uncontrollably, dying slowly, painfully until there is nothing but a wet gurgle left to remind you of his presence.

Yet, he lives, and you cannot allow that. Not while he remains a threat, not until he is no longer capable of causing harm or death to others. You pierce your sword through his throat, pinning him down to the ground and you let here it be there. If he miraculously finds the strength to crawl, he will not even be able to move an inch with your katana there. Besides, you do not want to continue using a sword that's caked in the blood of this monster.

But it is good to know that he will suffer, even if it's too late. That someone is going to pay for this atrocity. For this sin. All of those lives are wasted because of one person's twisted desires. Because of a single individual's desire to hold on to a woman, despite knowing that doing so meant sacrificing countless others in return.

You sigh deeply, the rage within you is fading away. It doesn't leave entirely, however, because the memories remain vivid and seared into your mind, reminding you of what happened and what needs to happen to ensure this nightmare never happens again.

You can't even imagine what Yoriichi would say in this situation. Would he scold you for killing this man? Would he call you cruel and heartless for doing so? Would he even feel sympathy for this man's fate, or would he be disgusted by this display, and even more disgusted by the fact that it was you who had done it? You can never know now. But perhaps, perhaps if he had seen the man's face, he might have felt something for him, and he surely would not have slaughtered him like you just did.

"It seems this world isn't beautiful after all," you murmur bitterly, looking down at all bodies piling down at your feet a broken chuckle escapes you as tears sting your eyes.

But you are not Yoriichi, you will never know what he would have done, you can only hope that Yoriichi would understand, that he would forgive you and realize that you did this out of necessity. Yet, even that you will never witness, after this surely there's no place for you in heaven anymore. No matter how you try to justify it.

You walk away, wiping the tears from your eyes and stepping carefully over the dead, heading towards the front door.

The sky above is clear and the sun is slowly rising, promising a new morning, a new day.

Chapter 11: ACT II • Yūgen VI

Chapter Text

It’s a beautiful day. Birds are singing. Flowers are blooming. The sun is shining and on days like these, it almost makes it worthwhile to wander throughout the land and walk the noble path of being a member of the Demon Slayer.

Well, as you said; almost.

"Head northeast! Northeast!" The crow flying above your head has been repeating this simple command for two hours, urging you both to walk even faster than you already do.

Well, you do not walk, Akio is jogging down the road while he's carrying you in his arms as if you are some damsel in distress, a delicate precious princess. You wish that would be true if only to use your royal status and command people to get beheaded.

You almost feel bad for him but your bones feel so old and weary. Every time you move your back it sounds like the Fourth of June or was it July? Whatever, you are currently not doing so well, and having pity for someone who looks a bit too happy about this situation isn't currently on your list of concerns.

So back to complaining out loud you go.

"When does this finally end? When will this cruel world finally show mercy to my wretched soul and let me feel death's sweet embrace?" You moan, by now the thought of just annihilating either the damn crow or simply yourself is a daily occurrence, "Or I don't know, let us take a damn break for once."

"That sounds heavenly,” Akio admits, sounding wistful, "Oh god, just imagine finally resting for once and not getting yelled at by a soon-to-be lunch meal."

Aniki, the bothersome crow, shrieks in pure terror at his statement as you snort in amusem*nt. It would be more amusing if only that annoying bird didn't have the ability to talk back, "I am not food and you have to head northeast now! There was a demon sighting!"

"You’re like a flying disease. You are nosy. You’re a dreadfully nosy, horribly bossy, appallingly flying disease." Akio is fast to answer, with a smile that shows he is completely done. To be fair, who wouldn't be done with their life when you get bossed around by a bird with the brain size of your pinky toe?

"He's right, you better control yourself. You’re victimizing us."You raise your hand and start tracing random lines onto Akio's cheek with your finger, okay, not so random. Just a silent cry for help in the form of some characters that suspiciously spell out 'Kill me'."Is there a boss crow or something? Because I wanna submit one or twenty complaints against you, of course anonymously."

"How much do you even get paid for?" He asks suddenly after the crow throws some colorful insults at you from left and right without any kind of shame whatsoever, "I pay you double the amount just so that you shut the f*ck up."

Good question though—

"Are you even get paid at all Aniki? Don't tell me you work for free?" A dramatic gasp leaves your lips after the crow confirms that it is true that he does not get paid,"You little freak. Who the f*ck would work for free in this economy? Only psychopaths."

You know that it is a bird you are talking about and you shouldn't care, but damn not even some delicious grapes or an apple? But then again, annoying people to death must be some kind of reward.

"Stop ganging up on me and head northeast!" And back to screaming, "It is your job, your duty as pillars of our honorable master."

Both of you give a different answer but at the same time it was the same, dismissing the bird because well, the honorable master can go f*ck himself or better, be a normal functioning human being who doesn't see Akio and you as some workaholic. Maybe lowkey alcoholics but certainly not workaholics!

"Technically, yes, it is our job but in another technicality, f*ck you." A very not-amused Akio answers and you can feel him tighten his grip on you. A bit tighter and he's gonna leave bruises on your already half-broken body.

"This is the worst job I’ve had in a very very very very long time." You roll your eyes, "Seriously, my hair is already turning white from all the stress!" No joke, you're deadly serious. A thick strand of hair turned white, directly on the outer layer which means you can not even hide it.

Of course, you will not tell that stupid bird that you actually think that it looks cute, or that the white hair has nothing to do with the stress per see but an annoying mark on your skin, anyways—

"Enough chitchatting now, you have to arrive before nightfall!" Aniki actually has the nerve to ignore you both,

"Hey," You snap impatiently, trying to catch the bird's attention through sheer annoyance. He ignores you, however, choosing instead to continue staring ahead, not that you care, "Do you know what kind of demon it is? What it looks like? Anything interesting worth mentioning?"

The bird gives you an irritated look, how? You don't know, "A female demon targeting questionable men throughout the region."

At the same time, Akio and you both let out a sigh, traveling together for what feels like years together makes you both creepily in sync.

It has pros, like when you both fight or have to flee some uncomfortable situations you totally did not put yourselves into. But it also comes with cons such as how much you've grown closer which means that sometimes you get really irritated at one another for no real reason other than how close you're acting with each other.

So it is no wonder that Akio instantly noticed that you're not asking for the sake of the mission. You do not care, in fact, you'd become an inanimate object if you care any less.

The thing is, you both would have gone to the mission and maybe saved someone's insignificant life but after mentioning the Ubuyashiki, meh, and now with the knowledge that it will not be Michikatsu that you will encounter there? No thanks, there's just no need for two or even one Hashira to slay the unknown demon.

Let some bothersome rookie do the job or die trying.

Ah- f*ck, that sounded harsh though you cannot help it. Something in you must have been broken, or why else would you simply not care about human lives that much anymore?

The wind blows across your forehead, tickling you. Reaching over you push those strands of hair off your face before they begin sticking to yours. You can barely feel them with your fingers, ever since you were in that slaughterhouse, whatever you touch is accompanied by a tingle of numbness.

To be honest, ever since you have become jittery, and utterly restless. Emotions running high, skin feeling hot enough as if it could melt metal; you constantly sweat, feeling as if your heart beats louder and faster every second until you want to scream. It's hard to keep calm, you don't even know how long you've been traveling.

Despite everything that has happened on this endless journey, despite the humiliation you have to endure and the wounds and scars collecting on your body—

You still do not want to give up.

Is it selfish? Probably. Is it illogical? Who knows. An unhealthy obsession? Oh, for sure.

Yet this is why you cannot wait till you reach your destination because then everything would have been worth it. Then you can forget all these horrible things you went through, then you can finally have the clarity that you have mattered, that you have existed.

That you have mattered.

How depressing. Your gaze turns towards Akio again, telepathically telling him that you do not have the slightest desire to even finish this mission at all. He seems amused as hell seeing that you're so upset but you know that he's going along with this.

Akio stops running and that's your cue to get out of his arms. Thankfully he doesn't just let go of you and have you fall into the mud instead he lowers himself first before letting go of you completely. You claim your place on the ground as gracefully as you can – that’s to say, not gracefully at all, stumbling a bit before finding your footing.

Then he stands straight, placing his hands on his hips to start his dramatic performance.

"How are we even supposed to fulfill this mission though?" He asks, a sh*t-eating grin forming on his face. His golden eyes seem even more amused while you stand there, looking at the crow that is slowly descending onto Akio's shoulder, waiting for him to continue with his drama.

"Just arrive there and slay the demon."

Do you detect the slightest bit of suspicion in the bird's tone or are you getting delusional enough to think that the feathery annoyance can have such complicated emotions?

"But I do not have a sword anymore, Aniki." You reply matter-of-factly while rolling your shoulders to ease out some tension that seems to be building between your neck muscles and spine due to your recent, "Do you want me to fist fight a demon to death?"

The blonde looks at your face and his expression morphs into one of understanding. He tears his eyes away from you and directs them toward your sword, shushing Aniki away from his shoulder. Your fingers reach towards the hilt where your palm gently rests on top of its surface.

"What is going on in your empty head?" The crow asks, almost sounding proud of himself for insulting you, "Is that not a sword on your hip?"

"This?" You pull your blade out of its sheath, holding it up for inspection, then spinning it a few times before bringing the tip down onto the ground, "It is clearly not in a good condition anymore."

It truly isn't. After using it almost on a daily basis for who knows long, plus the fact that you clearly have given up to maintain it properly it would have been useless in a few months anyway. So why not speed up the process and get a fully deserved break? With both your hands holding tightly onto the handle you start bending the blade, making sure it bends easily in ways that are meant for breaking.

Akio comes up from behind you, helping you to break it completely, causing a satisfying crack to sound throughout the area accompanied by the panic shrieks of the crow and laughter that sounds more like evil foxes instead of two very tired Demon Slayers.

After that, you proceed to take your blade apart piece by piece. How? You would lie and say it is because of sheer willpower but even you are not sure. So a mystery never to be solved yet again and you toss pieces of iron everywhere as Akio snickers beside you, unable to contain his amusem*nt and joy.

"See? Broken. Not useable anymore. What a shame." A sigh leaves your lips, you even dare to sound disappointed.

Akio snickers and contrary to his joy says, "How sad. Very sad. Anyways—"

"You idiots! Why did you do that— That— When Ubuyashiki-sama finds out you both—!"

Geez! You’d think you were drowning kittens with the way this crow is screaming at you. You’ve never seen such disappointment in a crow's eyes.

"So? What will your corrupt little organization do about this?" You ask calmly while Akio scoffs next to you, tossing the last part of the sword onto the ground in front of the bird, making him temporarily shut up.

"What am I supposed to tell our leader? This is not funny. If he gets angry..."The bird continues ranting but you stop listening to him after a point.

Instead, you turn around, walking backward while you stare at your companion. He catches your gaze and grins mischievously as he makes his way over to you. You smile softly back at him, giving the smallest hint of a wink, "Well, Aniki, it was a pleasure but we are now officially on a break. How about you go ahead and inform my swordsmith that I need a new one though?"

"Oh, that is your chance to be useful for once," Akio mocks before taking a step forward, pulling you with him as he walks right past the irate crow, leaving him standing in the middle of nowhere, alone except for the pile of broken parts in front of him.

"No, and I hope you both know that I hate you." This is the only answer you both get before it starts flying off.

"Don't worry, we know."

That is what you call a flawless victory.

— Or not.

Despite you having no sword, Akio of course still does and Aniki was almost too quick to assign new missions yet in the end it was still a small victory because the assignments were significantly fewer. You are not a waste of a human being, and certainly not an asshole so you both still did them and maintained the whole one sleeps while the other slays demonsarrangement.

It worked just fine but still no Michikatsu though. So that was disappointing and now you are facing a personal new nightmare.

After traveling for another few weeks and having a very short break because you got lost again, you both stand at the village entrance, while Akio is as always completely unbothered by the strange sight, you seek refuge behind his back like a koala.

Your arms are thrown around his neck, hopefully strangling him, while you suspiciously look around.This looks straight out of a Ghibli movie, and sadly not the good kind with the fluffy romance but the one that gave you nightmares as a child. Mainly, parents turning into pigs, stuffed No-Face chasing after the poor little girl and you cannot forget that weird ass baby.

Yeah, sikes, you are not doing well. Really not. Because f*ck this sh*t.

Masks everywhere, Hyottoko ones, looking at you both, probably, you don't know, but their heads turned in your direction as if you were the weird ones and not them.You don’t want this sort of attention, damn it. It's so freaky, so unnatural to see so many of them, their black eyes have no shine, no soul because, duh, they are just wooden masks but you wanna cry.

“Akio I think we stumbled into a different dimension, or the worst timeline, I don't know but are you sure we are still near Edo? It doesn't look like it!“ You whisper to him, feeling slightly stupid about having a tiny breakdown, “Did we get lost again? Please I can't handle another visit to Osaka!”

God, please, not Osaka again.That's where you found yourself when you got lost and it wasn't fun, truly, you thought it was going to be like the fun times you had in Kyoto, and at first, it was.

Until suddenly the female population decided that Akio and you are fresh new meat in town and ready they were, so ready to throw their pride away to get into your pants, well, more like tie the knot with you.

Sucks to be them, because you have a very gorgeous man waiting for you at home.

Maybe, hopefully.

f*ck.

And while at first, the attention wasn’t even that bad, over time it got actually so uncomfortable that even the ego-hungry trash you call Akio got overwhelmed and promptly decided that you both were lovers and on the run. Not that it bothered them, or that it stopped them, so that was your cue to promptly flee the town after only two days.

Of course after getting enough compliments and flattery that will last a lifetime or even longer and so much free food. Delicious free food.

But that made you question if the male specimen in Osaka is so rotten that they prefer some random swordsmen with unknown origin over something they knew. Like damn, who hurt these poor women that they seriously thought that Akio was such a win?

That, to be honest, was very much amusing. Because he isn't, well, in your eyes at least.

You on the other hand could be a big fat jackpot on the marriage market. It’s not even a question but they also thought you were a man, and probably a bottom after Akio's declaration. But they would be in for an odd surprise the first night together, so meh, at least now you know that you are a handsome man in the eyes of desperate women.

Nice.

Now you are not gonna be scared to get reincarnated as the opposite gender but that’s beside the point.

The point is that Akio and you vowed to never go back there in this lifetime and also not talk about it ever again. What happened in Osaka stays in Osaka, but if he decided to break this holy and sacred oath, you will let Michikatsu kill him.

No, you will beg him to kill Akio in a painful way.

"Of course, we are not near Edo, we are in the Mutsu province. To be exact Hiraizumi," He says back and you see the co*cky smile he has on his stupid face, "Well, you do need a new sword right? And I, as the best travel companion in the whole country, have to make that possible! Praise and gratitude are always welcome, so don't be shy."

What.

Yes, you do need a new sword after the let's say the 'borrowed one', and not the totally stolen one, is now broken after your little tantrum. Sure enough, you could take a demon in a fight, bare-handed and with nothing but your strength and sheer willpower but that would indicate that you have to do this until the sun rises.

You're a natural lazy sh*thead and still haven't discovered the whole bliss that comes from such sad*stic tendencies, so that's a no. For now.

But out of everything he said, two things are the most baffling of them all. Mutsu and Hiraizumi, that's f*ck, uh, let's try to use your brain cells for once. Living in this world, country, and especially different eras you do catch some useful information after all. Well, useful until the Meiji Restoration.

From what you remember the Uesugi clan had a fancy castle in that province, you think it was Aizu-Wakamatsu which is in modern times in the f*ckushima prefecture. Then there was the Nambu near Morioka, maybe? That should be Iwate prefecture, and oh, right, Date Masamune founded Sendai which is Miyagi.

So, haha, Mutsu province, huh, that's quite a long way from the Musashi province where Edo is located.

Now we have Hiraizumi was a kind of important location when it comes to the Heian era, you know, the whole Minamoto thing which you do not go into detail because it's not important. The village or town which again in modern times is located in the Iwate prefecture, is also surrounded by the Kitakami Mountains and more importantly very much destroyed in 1189 and with the fall of the Fujiwara clan.

The modern version of Hiraizumi village will be recreated though! That's cool but right now? In this very moment? It's still very much gone from the map and will be for another many decades. Seriously, this does not make any sense and why do you know all this sh*t?

Oh lord, did you live a miserable life in the Heian Era and are just too stupid to remember? Heh, that would be funny. No wait, it wouldn't because knowing your luck you would have encountered Muzan and—

Uh-no. No. Absolutely did you not, you will not go down that rabbit hole now. Do not entertain that thought any longer because it's probably because your love life was only present in your addiction to some Otome games, especially the ones with historical touch.

So, back to business and you were not expecting such motherf*ckery and you certainly have no idea how this idiot could possibly think that you are currently in the said destroyed village. The most critical question now is: Is Akio stupid?

The immediate answer is yes, but he can't be that stupid.

"It got destroyed, it doesn't exist anymore. This can't be Hiraizumi, you pest!" You stress the last word, snarling your teeth at him, "Did you pull this name out of your ass because you have read it somewhere and hoped I wouldn't know?"

“Not this time, you witch,” Akio answers, in some sort of hushed tone. But for a whisper, it is so loud you are pretty sure everyone hears it, "Maybe I should start calling you Brat instead of Hime-chan because you sure as hell don't behave like one."

"Excuse me?" You gasp out, dramatically holding onto your chest for the effect that Akio can't really see because you're still somehow hanging onto his back, "Did you just call me an annoying child?"

"Yeah! I am showing you something amazing, something not many will ever witness in their insignificant life and you behave like a five-year-old!"

He's sulking, that's cute and you would gush over that but you catch the thousands of stares from the Hyottoko on your back. Awkwardly, you try to make yourself as small as you can, smaller than you already are compared to the sh*thead who starts to walk into this hellhole while you still dangle in the air.

sh*t, sh*t, sh*t, going straight into the deepest pits of hell.

You know it would end up like that, there were red flags everywhere after he dragged you through the wilderness of Japan for days. Without telling you anything. Your life is so hard. Full of misery. But yeah, that was honestly stupid on your part but sadly you have to trust him in this adventure.

Every stupid decision he makes could lead you to Michikatsu, so you cannot complain. Doesn't stop you from officially hating your life though.

"And want is this super amazing and so rare thing that I am supposed to be seeing?" You sigh loudly, shifting your attention to the oh-so-beautiful sky.

Be dramatic everybody. It’s worth it and it'sbetter than observing the twenty mask-wearing people judging you. Yes, you don't have to see their real faces to know. You can feel it and you do not like it and mind you, getting judged by people wearing stupid masks was something so ridiculous that you haven't even considered happening in this lifetime.

“Praise me for I have brought you into The not so well hidden as they thought Swordsmith Village of the Demon Slayer Corps!" Akio bellows dramatically and it would have been almost dramatic if it weren't for you pulling at his face, "Aren't I amazing? What a question, of course, I am!"

"Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait—" Did he just say Swordsmith Village?

"That is many waits," He comments dryly, waiting patiently for you to comprehend the information he just gave you.

"Silence clown!"

The ultra-secret Swordsmith Village which is oh so hidden that the future protagonist has to get carried and transferred by numerous Kakushi who do not know where it is and get directions from crows who also don't know where the location is while being blindfolded so that he can't sell the information off to some demon?

Ok, time to stop. You shouldn't be surprised, actually, you aren't even surprised because you already figured out that this is the Swordsmith Village. There's no need to be a Sherlock when the evidence is spitting in your face with how clearly they are.

"Wait!" This is stupid, by the time Tanjirou is running around and picking up teeth from people he is not close with but surprisingly wants to, Hiraizumi should already be in the making again. How can this be the location then? Historical it doesn't make any damn sense again!

Logically speaking, it kind of does though. Hiraizumi is gone from the map, nothing but wildland to the normal folks and peasants and this general area was famous for its iron industry. If there is also some mystical hot springs around the corner? Perfect.

But why are you even questioning these things in the first place?

The best way to go about utterly confusing stuff is just… empty your mind, just accept what’s happening, and enjoy it while it’s occurring. Stop thinking, because if you start thinking about it, you’ll realize none of this makes sense and you’re lost in a bottomless void.

So just go with the flow. After all, in this world, magical bullsh*t like curses, siren-like voices that bewitch you, or passed down memories that you inherit through ancestry and well, demons are very much real. f*cking hell, aren't you yourself proof enough that not everything has a defined explanation as to why?

Maybe later on it just gets relocated? Maybe you will have the displeasure to find that out, so why the hell shouldn't Hiraizumi be the hidden Swordsmith Village? Just accept it and go on.

"Alright." You answer him finally and now with pure disinterest now.

"That's it?"

"Yeah."

"Wow."

Very deliberately, you roll your eyes. What does he expect? A ten-page written essay about how amazed and grateful you are? A PowerPoint presentation? A five-star Yelp review? 1/10. Would not recommend him, the one point is only because he's nice to look at.

"But I do feel kinda exposed, almost naked." You mumble to yourself, as Akio continues to stride to some unknown destination.

"Why is that little Hime?" Ah, back to the endearing nickname we are. He could never be annoyed at you, well, for long that is. Or that's what you like to believe, the same way that you like to believe that you hear concern in his voice instead of mockery. "Well, if you wanna feel naked and exposed for real, we could—"

Instantly you tighten your arms around his neck. You really do wanna strangle him again but it does jack-sh*t. f*ck, you had hope, a glimmer on this very dark sky that is his soul but he always manages to be a complete disappointment. You click your tongue with dissatisfaction, "How about you shut the f*ck up."

"How about no?" Akio adds without a care in the world.

Your nose wrinkles, but you have more important things at hand. With all the courage that you possess, you look around, "Why is everyone covering their damn face? Even you're wearing your damn blindfold again. You, traitor, should have told me that there's a dress code for this place."

"Why not ask someone if they borrow you one? Or we could just take one without asking. I am kinda leaning toward the second option." He just snickers at your misery. For someone who's a Rengoku, he sure has a trashy personality and you love it when it isn't directed towards you.

"I want my own one and not a borrowed one." You click your tongue with dissatisfaction, "A fox one, or an oni one? Maybe then these little f*ckers will not run the moment they see us."

"Lucky you have your own money because I ain't buying you one." He retorts and you gasp audibly, shocked, appalled and dismayed. Your day is ruined.

You thought in his eyes you're a five-year-old, so shouldn't he buy his unwanted child some nice things? To fill the void created by the lack of parental affection and unwavering love because he's a sh*tty father and thinks material stuff could make up for that?Completely in the sense of the motto 'You break it, You buy it.”

— But that was also your argument to get your father to pay for your therapy in your former non-anime life. He did not pay for it.So time to use your ultimate card.

"It's my birthday today though?"

"It's not."

You twist your lips into a thin line, "Damn it."

But there's another thing you have observed uncomfortably craning your neck to look more around. Not even one person dares to stand in his way as he strides confidently through the village. It isn't surprising because you too would stay the f*ck away if he was waltzing down the road but they all also stop whatever they are doing and just look.

That's too weird and totally suspicious.

"Is it just me or is that hostility that I feel coming from these uh," How do you describe these figures from your future nightmares the nicest way possible? You give up, "Monsters with swords that look as if they do not shy away from using them against you?"

It's not that they are truly freaks or monsters in your eyes, and you do appreciate all the hard work they put into making swords. If you could you would give them all a gift basket but you love your money too much to do that and the whole situation gives you goosebumps.

For f*cks sake, not one demon in this lifetime ever gave you those! No wait, that's a lie, you met Muzan. There certainly were goosebumps involved but also death.

"Yeah, they hate me." The blond idiot just shrugs.

Understandable, you either hate or love him. People just have the tendency to stick to the whole loathing him thing since hatred has always been easier than love. Loving means accepting him with all his flaws and many do not want to make an effort.

This leaves the question of why these little funny people despise him, normally one out of a hundred people like him, but here the statistics don't seem to apply, "Are you going to tell me why or are you gonna pretend to be super mysterious just to wake me up in the middle of the night to tell me anyway?"

"Funny story!" Comes the swift answer and you doubt that it's gonna be any fun, "You know that the village is super secret because they are scared that some idiot would expose the location if they get pushed or threatened enough and how no one but the venerable Ubuyashiki family knows where exactly it is, right?"

"Every member knows that. That's one of the first things drilled into you when you become one," Or not, who knows. Nobody told you anything in the Sengoku Era, maybe because you never asked in the first place.

"One fateful day I stumbled through the area, of course on purpose and not because I lack the sense of direction or anything. Anyway, through sheer coincidence I found this little fancy village and now they are scared that I am gonna be the idiot that exposes the location!" He speaks about it as if it's some great achievement and you hate to admit that it is one, "And since they can't do anything against it, they do not like me who comes here unannounced."

Bitch says what?

The new information just short-circuits your poor brain. He didn't even have the courtesy to maybe send a letter saying 'Yo, I am coming over with a companion. Have a new sword ready at 5'?Alright what do you expect, common sense is something that Akio does not possess.

"I say that with all the adoration I have for you," You take a deep breath, "I'm surprised you haven't been murdered yet."

"I know right? It's so weird." He says, almost ominously, "Let's see if we survive the night and do get murdered while staying here. After all, you are also an uninvited, unwanted guest and another idiot that they gonna fear now!"

f*ck, this is going to be worse than Osaka, isn't it?

Akio and you have some unwritten laws, waking you up from your well-deserved sleep is one such rule.

Having nightmares over and over again makes it almost impossible to even sleep for more than four hours without waking up, so for you, it is a rarity to be able to sleep well at all.The point is you need your sleep, okay? You want your sleep. The whole village could get engulfed by flames, or the earth could split open, you are going to get your sleep, no matter what.

But for the last few days as you sadly predicted Akio had the audacity to shake you awake in the middle of the night.

"f*ck, please wake up— Seriously, I think the devil is finally trying to kill us for real," With these words, he broke the unspoken laws of this little world.

Groaning and blinking rapidly, you try to get used to the darkness only to see Akio sweating buckets and silently point in the direction of the door. You had no choice, and it was also alarming to see fear in his golden eyes, to turn around and see whatever had him almost pissing his pants.

It takes you a second, and then another, and well, no doubt, this is hell.

At first, you thought it was your friendly sleep paralysis demon, Paul, but no. Certainly not. Paul was chill and harmless, but that monster standing at your door is leakingbloodlust in heavy waves.Standing at the open door was one of the residents of the village, with this f*cking creepy Hyottoko, and thanks to the moonlight that illuminates their silhouette, you see the glint of a damn knife in their hand.

The most disturbing part? It happens every night, and you swear by everything you hold dear, you scream pathetically every single time and you're glad that Akio is doing the same. Otherwise, he would never let you live down that embarrassing moment.

It's the scariest thing you've ever experienced, and you don't even know if it's always the same person or if the whole village is on it. You don't know if they just want to scare you or just wait for the perfect moment to slaughter you both but now Ubuyashiki is the one that owes you therapy instead of your father because you are traumatized for the next twenty lifetimes.

"Tell me how long do we have to stay here again? I don't think we will survive another night." You sigh deeply as you stumble out of the hot spring, dressed in some more casual clothing.

The only good place this hellhole provides is truly the hot spring and the water is probably as hot as the depths of hell.

How fitting.

Sadly you do not get a peaceful moment there because your companion does not shy away from your side, at all. You do not care that he's seeing you almost naked and only dressed in a towel that covers everything important. But you want your peace for once and sulk.

Well, now you can say that if every Rengoku is packed as Akio, they are blessed by the gods. Akio on the other hand has the knowledge that he saw you naked before Hakuji ever had the chance to, which explains the everlasting smug expression on his face.

"Haganezuka-san said it would usually take up to three months," He yawns loudly from your right side, completely dressed in his normal clothes with just his sword missing, "But because he and the rest of the village want to get rid of us as soon as possible, a month."

That's right, you have the honor of having an ancestor of Haganezuka Hotaru as your wordsmith, and once again you are reminded of the fact that apparently, you are a magnet for important characters or their family.

It sucksand you're pretty sure he is the culprit of your sleepless nights. You wouldn't be surprised if the fearful faces of you both motivate him every single day to work as quickly as possible. It would also explain the knife.

"Another two sleepless weeks, great." You say absentmindedly.

"Don't worry, I doubt they will truly harm us," He ruffles your hair, ignoring your groan, "But what worries me is that thing. It's getting bigger and bigger."

He gestures towards your chest area and your brain shuts down for a second. Did he just call your boobs a thing? The f*ck? Besides, doesn't Akio know that it's normal for women to have boobs that grow when they hit puberty? He must, he has been around you long enough and you are already way past the puberty phase.

Oh god, what if he doesn't even know what they are called?

"Do you mean my boobs?" You tilt your head, utterly lost on what he is implying, until the realization hits you too late, "Wait— Stop paying them any attention, f*cker."

"In my defense, they are unmissable, and remember you are the one that flashed me," Akio puts his hands defensively in the air, "But I mean the mark, you idiot. It got bigger than the last time I saw it and honestly, I thought it will stay as small as mine but soon you will not be able to hide it from others."

Well, he isn't wrong.

You don't even remember when it appeared. With all the missions you both had to endure without any breaks, it is hard to pinpoint the exact moment. It wasn't until Akio had to patch you up that you even noticed it.

In another life, it was just a tiny mark in the shape of a crescent moon sitting on top of your heart, but now, there are dark lines, that have covered your entire chest area, ranking down your right arm. Even now you can see them peaking from behind the sleeve of your kimono and it's quite scary how much it has grown.

Your finger travels softly over the lines, a tingling sensation, and yet at the same time, it feels painfully numb. It reminds you of how utterly empty you felt when the realization hit you, back then you did not weep or wail. There was no hurtful ache in your heart or unbearable pain.

No shock or denial. Instead, you just asked yourself— how?

How is it that this mark is appearing without the presence of the marked one? How did it even manifest? Was it some sort of punishment for killing a human being or for leaving Hakuji? Is this the prize you have to pay for chasing the past?

It did not make any sense, but there's nothing that you could do against it. There's nobody to blame for your demise but yourself. You chose this path, and now you are paying the consequence.

"Wait." He suddenly stops dead in his tracks, his eyes sparkling as if he just thought about a noble prize-winning discovery, "If it gets even bigger and spreads over to your other arm, then we are gonna match soon! It will probably bug Hakuji so much when he sees it."

And thus your partner in crime is back to his usual self again.

You look at him with a raised eyebrow, still haven't fully accepted this situation but you decide to play along with it, "You do know that this is not something to be proud of right? It’s a death sentence."

I am sorry that because of my selfishness, it is also yours.

"A death sentence? Come on Hime, aren't we a bit too young to even think about that? It will be fine as long as we make the best out of this, right?" He places his hands on his hips in a serious matter. You can see that he's trying to find the silver lining in this situation, but you wish he wouldn't, "So you do think it is going to irk him? I hope so. It's going to be his payback for every time he was a pain in my ass."

"I mean, yeah, he probably will not like it," You reply absentmindedly, but really, there is no joy in your voice, "But you do remember he also has tattoos right? Or did you already forget what he looks like?"

"Ah, damn, I really forgot about his little criminal history," Akio sighs heavily as he ruffles his hair, which had gotten quite long.

But now that you think about it, how long have you been away from Hakuji and the others? Constantly being on the move without a real destination for such a long time, it almost feels like a lifetime. You have been constantly moving forward without ever looking back, never being able to properly face all the hurt and regret you left behind.

Your feet have stopped moving forward, and the words you have to tell him are suddenly weighing so much in your mouth, "How long has it been since we left?"

Akio shrugs and offers a smile, "I don't know, it all blends together into one big mess, but it must have been two years. Almost three."

Oh god.

"Three years?" Your voice cracks slightly, and you clear your throat in an attempt to cover up that embarrassing moment. It has been far longer than you had imagined. Far longer than it should have been. So much for just one year, it's been over two years now.

Another broken promise.

"Don't tell me you want to run back now? I thought you wanna find that demon you're so fond of?" He tugs you forward by the sleeve and you can see his devilish smile, "Or are you scared that he doesn't want you anymore and has moved on?"

You shove him in the shoulder playfully, but you don't miss the stab of hurt in your chest.

For a moment; you want to actually say yes. You want to crawl back to Hakuji and beg for forgiveness because he did nothing wrong.

You were the one who abandoned him, the one who messed up.You were the one who wasn't honest, who ran away from his touch, from his warm embrace, from his everything and the ugly truth is that you actually have not thought so much about him. While you didn’t forget, you put it all aside, too focused on anything else.

And yet you can't help but wonder if he even waits for you anymore; if he still cares about you.

Just the thought of him smiling at someone else or being with another person is enough to drive you mad. The fact that he might have found someone else in your absence makes you feel utterly pathetic. It feels like an open wound and all you can do is swallow the bitter lump in your throat.

How wretched are you? How utterly disgusting and despicable are you? You, out of all people, have no right to feel this way.

As always, you swallow it down, your gaze focuses back on him, and youoffer a weak smile, "Don't be ridiculous, Akio. You know that's not the case."

"Oh, is that so?" Akio throws his arm over your shoulder as you both continue walking, "And here I thought you would at least feel the tiniest bit ofregretor be scared that he would fall for Koyuki.”

He’s joking, you know that he doesn’t mean to hurt you at all. He just wants to check if you still want to continue this path in his own way but you cannot control how your heart skips a beat in your chest,or howyour mouth goes dry at the mere thought of Hakuji and Koyuki together.The mark burns with an aching pain, of course, it isn't a new image for you to picture.

It is something that would have happened if it weren’tfor your selfishness.The mere thought of it hurts so much. It makes you feel nauseous and bitter at the same time but you, of all people, have no right to be jealous over this.You are nothing but aghostin thisstory, just a background characterwho is still stuck in the prior chapters.

"Are you jealous?" Akio continues and you hate him for being able to read you like an open book, "Come on, I bet you are–“

"Isn’t it okay for him to be happy?”Youforce yourself to say and bite the inside of your cheek,thesmile on your face is forced and strained.It burns in your lungs but you can't bring yourself to take the words back, "If Hakuji finds happiness in Koyuki then it's fine, really."

"And what about you?" His golden eyes bore into your soul, his gaze piercing your heart as if he could see straight through you, "You sure you're okay with that?"

“Maybe? Probably not though.” You simply shrug.

The truth is you have no idea how you are supposed to feel. It is all a mess in your head, and you simply do not want to think about this anymore. It's not the right time and place to do so. You need a distraction, and Akio is the only thing you can rely on right now.

Even though he is the reason you thought about this mess in the first place.

"Well, if he doesn't want you anymore," He grins as he pulls you closer against his side, his gaze full of mischief, "Then I am more than happy to take over his place."

You roll your eyes at his words, but you cannot help the little chuckle escaping your lips. In a way you really are blessed to have Akio by your side, he's always there, and even though he teases you a lot, "Sure, let’s say if Hakuji doesn’t want me anymore then hm, let’s marry when we are both 25.”

Your statement has him going quiet for a moment before he looks down at you with a wicked smile, "Aren’t you cruel Hime? To give me false hope and all? I'm gonna cry."

"Then why start something you can’t win?" You smile sweetly at him, your tone full of mockery, and Akio simply rolls his eyes at you.

"Don't be like that, I'm joking. It's not like I have any interest in you in that way other than teasing you to the death," Akio retorts in a teasing manner, but it's obvious that he isn't as joyful as he pretends to be, "I just don't like the thought of you being sad. You are my family after all," His golden eyes have softened and his tone is just that much gentler than before, "So don't worry, everything will be fine. I am sure that idiot still thinks about you, we both know how stubborn he is."

A small part of you wants to believe in Akio's words, but you cannot help but feel like he is also trying to reassure himself, that when you both return home nothing will have changed but it's quite sad, actually, if you think about it.

"I am not worried, moron. I am actually a bit worried about how Hakuji will react when he sees us again," Your voice sounds light-hearted despite the seriousness behind them, "I mean, look at us, these two years really took a toll on us. It's not like we are that pretty to look at right now, is it?"

Akio looks at you for a moment, his expression softening into a soft smile. For a brief second, he seems to be genuinely sad. His gaze is sad, his features are grim and you think that maybe Akio is finally understanding that it will never be the same. That this isn't going to end well.

But no, he is taking in your appearance. The thick white strand of hair and the many scars that have accumulated on your skin over the years, the many cuts hidden underneath your sleeves that you have inflicted on yourself to lure out demons with your blood.Your skin is no longer as radiant and glowing as it was before, he looks at the bags under your eyes, the slight weight loss that has accumulated over the months, and how your eyes do not sparkle or shine like they once did.

All the new wounds and scars that have made their home on your body that is now running on borrowed time since then, the ones he had to patch up after countless missions.But most of all, he looks at the mark that has made its home on your chest.

The dark lines have grown and expanded from the crescent moon, ruling the length of your arm and spreading like an infection. You look nothing like the person he knew from before but despite everything, your smile is still as brilliant as the sun just as radiating but it is a lie that is meant to cover up all the loathing underneath.

He cannot help but wonder if you have also lost yourself along the way and that in turn makes Akio wonder just how far you are willing to go to find that precious demon.Is your mind so full of thoughts of him that it drives you to this madness? Until your eyes are completely dead and empty?

It is a terrifying thought but he wants to meet the demon that have you forgotten all about Hakuji until you get reminded of him.

"You don't look that bad to me. I mean you're still a cutie, Hime," Akio quickly corrects himself as he rubs the back of his neck sheepishly, "I guess you can say that I look like sh*t compared to you though."

The more you look at him, the more you notice the changes in Akio as well.

His blonde hair has gotten longer and is currently tied into a ponytail. There's a sharp edge to his features now that there is a scar that covers the right side of his face. It runs from the top of his forehead down his cheek and stops under his jaw, taking up most of his face. Even now it still looks quite painful.

You know that this isn't the only scar that adorns him now. He also has countless more under his clothes, the ones that didn't heal despite consuming demons. His golden eyes seem dull whenever he spaces out for too long, and his posture is stiff whenever he sees someone new.

When you look at him, you notice all the little details you never noticed before. You notice how he avoids certain topics and avoids talking about certain missions, you realize that he also seems to have lost his spark and that he, too, has been running on borrowed time for a long time now.

"But you don't look like sh*t. I mean, you're not ugly or anything," Your voice cracks ever so slightly when you add, "But we are a mess, aren't we?"

"That's true," He chuckles sadly, his golden eyes shining with an unreadable emotion, but it is quickly replaced by a mischievous glint, "But you still haven't answered my question. Do you want to go home or continue your little adventure?"

You shake your head and offer him a smile, "What do you think? I am getting a new sword and I don't want Haganezuka-san hard work to go to waste."

"He would cry out of happiness since that would mean you two fools would be finally gone." That promptly makes Akio and you stop dead in your tracks, because whomst the f*ck just said that and destroyed the heavy mood you two have been in?

Your gaze travels toward the source of the voice that so-rudely intrudes on your conversation and figures, it is a resident of the village, standing in the forest just a few meters away from you. You sure as hell don't know who that is specifically, for you, they all look the same.

But he has a wooden box that he cannot carry and answers in a natural sarcastic tone.

That alone makes him interesting to someone like Akio and you who can possess the nosiness of kindergarten children, and have mood swings at their finest. One moment you are edgy and gloomy, the next you act normal that is one thing that hasn't changed.

Besides it is a very nice distraction. Plus on the box, there's written quite boldly 'Don't touch, or you're dead' on it.

"Good evening, do you need help with that?" You bow a bit in greeting, just because you are naturally a punishment towards society and certainly would in any other situation dismiss a sarcastic and bothersome kid, you wanna figure out what's in the box.

Thus you have to be polite.

Akio has other plans, "What's in the box?"

Apparently, the young man or, well, child, since you would place him something around fourteen or sixteen, did not expect that you would hear him, or pay him any attention. His whole demeanor changed from sassy to literally screaming nervousness and you can almost see him sweating, or are these tears?

Well, sucks to be him because you don't care and after an uncomfortable long ten seconds without an answer, you try again, just a little bit louder this time, "Do you need our help? It looks as if you are struggling quite a bit."

"N-No! Please, just ignore me!" He definitely sounds as if he's on the verge of crying.

You blink slowly, your head co*cking to the side. Are you both that scary? There's no way. Your whole aura radiates innocence and benevolence, a picture-perfect angel, and Akio— Forget it.

Yes, you both can be scary, alright. But so much that someone starts crying just because they saw you? Demons do, all the damn time but never had a human before.

Before you can ask the obligatory 'Are you sure', Akio is already four steps ahead of you. Hauling the box in the air and out of the hands of the poor swordsmith without breaking a sweat. Now he's crying for sure and you cannot blame him.

"Please put it down, you moron!" And now he's crying and screaming, great, at least he tries to be polite, "It's fragile and I'm going to kill you if you break it!"

"What if I don't though?" Akio doesn't care, and certainly doesn't hold back from being an asshole, "It takes more than a prepubertal pipsqueak hitting me to stop me from doing whatever I want."

"I am eighteen!" Cries the little swordsmith, completely outraged.

"And? You still can't carry the box. How about you show some gratitude that I help you."

"I did not ask you for any help though?!"

"How can you carry this then?" Akio opens the lid just a little bit, enough to see the black silhouette inside but not enough to see any details.

That's your cue to intervene, you're afraid the poor guy will faint if this keeps up. No one wins against the menace to society, the rumored outcast of the proud Rengoku family, when it comes to trying to bring him to his senses or bend him to their will. If he wants to do something, he just does it.

"Hey, Hyottoko-chan just ignore him, he's an idiot," There's a dramatic gasp and you just pinch Akio's cheek, mainly just so that he's gonna shut up for once and let you handle this situation. Turning your attention back to the swordsmith you continue, "Just tell us where to put the box and accept your fate."

And accepting his fate he does, surprisingly without much further resistance. What a clever fellow.

You can still feel the sassy attitude radiating off of him.

While walking to the destination, the swordsmith finally revealed his name because he was already sick of you calling him Hyottoko-chan whenever you got noisy in the last five minutes.

It's Hyōtokusu by the way, so yeah, it isn't even so far off from what you have been calling him in the first place. Not that you would point it out though.

Thankfully it does not take long to arrive at a clearing and you can hear Hyō, his new nickname because you're too lazy to say his full name, sigh in relief, because it means you two will f*ck off now. Everyone does that when they have to be in the company of you for longer than five minutes. So you're not surprised.

"Thank you for carrying it here," Hyō-chan drags his sentence a bit, before he bows lightly, "I sincerely hope we see each other never again."

Once again it sucks to be him because you have no intention of leaving, at all, and Akio makes it clear in the way he starts to laugh, "What do you mean with never? We want to know what is in there and we have plenty of time to annoy you into giving in."

"Two weeks to be exact." You add while nodding, "Do you really wanna see us every single day?"

"There's no way you could even hide from us. We would tear apart the entire village, and wreak havoc just for you." Akio smiles in an innocent way that doesn’t suit his words at all, "Do you really want that little Hyō?"

You two really are assholes, guilt-tripping the poor boy into giving in to your whims and demands without any mercy. Of course, you blame your companion for your sh*tty behavior and every day you care a little less about your blackening personality. Maybe it's because Hyō is truly a clever fellow because it seems as if he has carefully weighed his options, and come to the conclusion that getting hunted down by two idiots isn't worth the trouble of keeping the contents of the box a secret.

"Do I have a choice? Besides it was created for swordsmen after all," Again he sighs for the ninth time, "But it's not a plaything! It's for training and if I see you two do anything suspicious with it besides training I will get you thrown out of the village!"

What the f*ck is he talking about?Now you kind of have a bad feeling about the whole thing, at the back of your mind, there's a nagging feeling that this is really not a good idea and that you are the one that should run.

You throw an uncertain glance toward Akio, but his eyes are trained on the box, sparkling a tad too much. So, he doesn't care that much either, which is reassuring in a weird way but also so irritating.

"We wouldn't dream of destroying something that isn't ours," Akio adds with a casual tone and an innocent smile that doesn't reach his eyes. What a liar.

Hyō is giving you a dubious look, as if he doesn't trust you one bit but in the end, it is good enough for him. He turns towards the box and starts his explanation while opening it, "It's a mechanical doll that one of my ancestors created for the purpose of training swordsmen while they wait for their sword."

"Wait, that actually sounds entertaining?" He literally sparkles now, he is way too excited even to notice that you do not even hear him, "We are finally free from boredom!"

You are too lost in your thoughts, racking up your brain to remember anything about a doll from the Swordsmith Village Arc.

There are moments when you instantly recall an event or a name or for f*cks sake, a single damn line. Then there are moments where your mind is vacant of anything relating to the events, for example, you do remember the name Shinazugawa Sanemi, that he's the future Wind Hashira, and that he's supposed to have some sort of sob backstory.

But other than that, you're drawing a blank for the love of god, you cannot recall how many scars will adore his face or how many siblings he had. Maybe it's because he is not the only Wind Hashira you know of, or quite frankly he is not your Wind Hashira. When you try to picture Sanemi's face it morphs into Suzukaze Shigeo, one of the best people you have ever known and he's dead.

The thought of his death still makes you shiver, you do not even know how he met his end and that's what happens when you think of the Wind Hashira or any other in general. It's like there is a storm of emotions rattling at your ribcage, a cold wind blowing through your heart.

So you don't, in fact, you avoid thinking about any of them altogether, and yet, there are times when you just can't help it, like now, when something about the whole thing rubs against the wrong nerve.

You just tune in again as Hyō is finally raving over the doll, completely matching Akio's childish display of excitement, "—And it has one hundred and eight different movements! Apparently, it's modeled after a real swordsman that lived at one point. They had to give him six arms to even be able to replicate his movements which sounds a bit extravagant I know but it’s true!"

Funny. That sounds almost like— Wait.

Oh, holy f*cking sh*t.

Your shoulders become tense as you remember now but you still try to find any reason that your memory has to be mistaken, that the doll will not have his face or appearance.

Today is really not your day, first Hakuji and now— f*ck, can you even trust your mind, though?

Maybe it’s just your mind jumping to conclusions, and yet, call it a survival instinct or self-preservation of your sanity but the mere thought to see that doll in all its glory is more than enough for you to understand that it will completely break you apart.

For years you have tried to collect every broken piece of you and carefully mended it together.

Piece for piece, yet no matter how well you mend those pieces, you are still a mess, a patchwork quilt. There is no way you could ever be whole again. But it is better than having him inside your head all the time, making you feel like you will never come out of the dark.

Now after almost a decade, you were finally at the point where the flicker of his image doesn't raise the urge to wail and scream, to break down, to tear apart anything you can get your hands on. Where his ghost does not haunt your dreams anymore but solely that of the Demon Lord.

It is such a tragic truth that you even desire him over the man that meant so much to you. But your heart yearns for him nonetheless, like a parasite, it wants to ruin everything you've built up over the years. Now, seeing this creation will add even more salt to the injury, it will only show you how little of him you have and you are afraid, very much scared that there will be nothing left of you to hang on to when they open the box.

And yet, perhaps what frightens you the most is finally seeing his face so clearly, so faithful to his appearance when he was still alive, that you will realize just how distorted and hazy his image is in your memory.

This is going to leave you rotten and bleeding all over again. It will rip your heart from your chest and tear your soul apart and you don't know if you can once again pick up all these broken pieces. You don't know if you have the strength to mend them all back together, and if you do, you don't know what's even going to be left.

What is the use in trying to rebuild then, if you will end up right back here, with the same broken mess you started with?

So instead of giving in to your emotions, you pretend that everything is fine, that you are calm and composed. You ignore the cold shiver that runs down your spine and the sudden stinging pain in your heart as you fake a smile that's as brilliant as the sun.

"Sounds like it's the perfect toy for us!" Akio squeals like a kid, he's so excited that he already forgot to not treat it as such, "Sorry Hime, but I am going to be the first one who tries it."He doesn't notice your inner struggle and neither does Hyō who's too caught up in his own excitement.

“It's not a toy,” You say, barely holding back the sharpness of your tongue despite your smile and that makes you panic. You try to find an excuse, "Besides, how do you even wanna train Kio? We left your sword in our room and I think it does jacksh*t if you just use some random stick that's laying around."

Hyō chuckles and answers you, "That's no problem, Akio-san can use one of the blades from the doll. For now, we will just equip it with wooden ones since you two have never trained with it and I am not in the mood to clean up your remains just because you have overestimated yourself."He finishes his explanation and grabs a few wooden swords from the box before handing them to Akio.

You want to protest but somehow it seems as if you are not entirely in control of your own body. Your thoughts are jumbled up and you cannot seem to find the words necessary to speak your mind. The only thing that comes out of your mouth is a rush, "Well, have fun you two, I am going to get some well-deserved sleep."

But instead of letting you go, Akio takes your hand and tugs on it until you are forced to stand still again, "Wait, Hime, are you sure? If you want to rest then do it here, this is such a rare opportunity."

"You want me to sleep on the ground and get stomped to death because you forget I am here?" You ask as you struggle to pull your hand free of his grasp, "That doesn't sound like a good idea to me."

Akio is too good at reading your expressions, and it's not that he is stupid, it's just that he cares too much about you to simply ignore you. But sometimes you wish he would, especially when he looks at you as if he sees through you.

And as always he knows how to make things worse because he continues, "It's just a few hours on the floor, we do that all the time! Besides, I want you to see how I will destroy Hyō's precious toy!"

"I have seen enough of your destruction," You tell him, even as you can feel your heart pounding in your chest, your body just screams that it's a bad idea. That you should run and never look back.

"I have seen enough of your destruction," You tell him, even as you can feel your heart pounding in your chest, your body just screams that it's a bad idea. That you should run and never look back.

From the corner of your eye, you can see Hyō holding the black cloth that had the doll hidden away, and so in a panic, you turn your attention back to Akio, who is smiling as if the mere mention of destruction brings forth his inner demons as if he can no longer contain himself.It is a look you have seen so often before, and normally you enjoy this side of him very much.

Yet, when they catch your gaze again they see right through your little farce, filled with a hint of worry for you. That's what you truly like about him, even though he is concerned for you, he knows when to not ask any questions and right now, you just want to run for your life.

"Just, please Akio," You turn your head away and focus on the ground as you try to figure out how to escape, "I am really tired and don't feel well."

"Okay," His smile falters but he still nods, not even bothering to hide the eagerness in his voice, "I understand but it's just for a few hours right?"

No, it's not, you want to say, you could feel his eyes boring into the back of your head, but what comes out is a weak, "Fine."

Dawn rises, slowly enveloping the world in the darkness of night as you wander aimlessly around the village with no destination insight. You have been walking for a few hours and it has grown darker and darker the further you go until the shadows of the buildings seem to be pressing down upon you.

But you cannot bring yourself to stop.

To go your room, to lie down, and pretend that everything is all right, that there is nothing wrong with your body, your heart. That you are not a pile of dust and you will never be able to come back from what happened.

One painful step after another, farther and farther away from the heartbreaking image from your past. You try not to think of any of them, not even of the doll. It is such a pathetic attempt, and yet, it's the best you can manage. To shut everything down, to not think about anything that's remotely related to him.

As always you run away, covering your eyes not to remember even more than you already do, hiding away until you can’t anymore, and then you have to once again deal with the fact that you are still alive, while he is dead and gone, nothing but ashes against the wind.

God, you are pathetic.

You were one of the strongest demon slayers, for f*ck’s sake, from the Golden Age of Demon Slayer to exact but you run away the moment something reminds you of that time,and yet you still chase after it, abandoning a perfectly content life for a past you run from.

In the end, you really that you are nothing but a sad, miserable, weak woman and yet, it is not a revelation. You have known it for years. You have spent most of your life trying to convince yourself otherwise, but it only gets more complicated as time passes.

At this point, you deserve, no, you demand a direct apology from the heavens. All of this may be your own fault, but in a sense, it also isn't.

It still doesn't change that a lump forms in your throat, choking back some kind of hysterical sobbing you cannot let free. There is too much on your mind right now and it is hard to hold it together, to think of anything else but this terrible feeling in the pit of your stomach.

“This is the fifth time I have seen your sorry ass walking by my workshop,” A raspy voice calls out to you, and you freeze as you turn around and come face to face with another Hyottoko mask, "It's so damn annoying, you either wander down a different street or stop completely."

The man you observe is tall. Everyone is tall, you’ve been over it so many times, so why does it matter? It still irks you, and it doesn't help that your mood already hit rock bottom.

"Are you the neighborhood watch or what?" You can feel all your strength draining out of you like water down a drain. Forcing a smile, you shake your head and look at him with forced cheerfulness, "You know what? How about I'm going to walk this way twenty more times with my sorry ass, just because you know, I can?"

"I am serious,“ His tongue clicks with irritation, "All your pathetic sighing is bothering me, so if you want your sword as soon as possible. Go away and bother that menace you came with."

"Haganezuka-san, I presume." You say, trying to keep the bitterness out of your voice. He is after all the one who has the misfortune to forge a sword for you and if he's anything like his descendant in the Taisho Era, you sure as hell do not want to be on his sh*t list.

The man snorts with laughter, "And here I thought you were as stupid as that blond moron."

He turns and walks back into the protective walls of his workshop. You are quick to follow after him, taking it as an invitation and hey, it's better than wandering around for another couple of hours. It's not as if you actually did have a destination in mind, and this gives you the option to have a distraction.

Your greedy eyes take in the workshop though, it is small and cramped with tools and piles of metal scraps piled up everywhere. It's a little dirty, but not as bad as you would have expected considering the amount of work he does. It smells of oil and fire and steel, and despite all the dust and grime, the place has a strangely homely atmosphere.

"You look even more miserable than any other time I have seen you running around through the village," There's this taunting tone in his voice. You are on his sh*t list, alright."I didn't think it was possible but here you are."

"Maybe I look so sh*tty because I haven't had a good night's sleep for days?" You retort not hiding your annoyance.

"Oh, how awful, you poor girl," His voice drips with sarcasm and you cannot stop yourself from rolling your eyes, "And why is that?”

Haganezuka, you decide, is kind of a sad*st.

Only kinda means a whole lot in this one moment. He’s enjoying this far too much even though this is the first interaction you both have with each other, but how much amusem*nt can you ever experience when you’re trapped in one village your whole life? Probably not much.

"I don't know, probably because a swordsmith with immense bloodlust took pleasure in standing in my room every night and scaring me with a very sharp knife." You say with a bored expression on your face as if you are talking about the weather, "Doesn't really help with my sleep pattern, you know?"

“That sounds really amusing. Who could do something so brilliant?” He's not even trying to come across as innocent, he is snickering like an evil fox because you know it's him and he definitely knows you know it.

You can only stare into the lifeless black eyes of his mask, listening to him having the time of his life while you do not have the energy to fight back, but you also don't have the strength to simply leave. So you sit down on the ground and sigh, "I suppose I deserve that."

"You deserve much more than that. Coming to the village unannounced, destroying all my work, and disturbing my peace of mind," His voice is laced with bitterness but there is also some sort of happiness, it's weird to say but you can hear it in his voice. "I didn't think that you would be able to ruin my work so easily."

"To be fair, the sword would have been broken in a few months anyway, even without me deliberately breaking it," You answer with a shrug, "So, in the end, I just helped speed up the process."

"Aren't you just a pain in the ass?" He sounds annoyed but you can tell it's not genuine, "Sorry, I’m not taking criticism from someone who’s half my height."

...Seriously, why is every person you met so damn cheeky and sassy towards you? You have known this man for five minutes and he already managed to get under your skin. Even Hyō was quick to throw some insults.

Wait. Are you the problem? No, you don't think you are the problem. Maybe you are.

Oh god, are you the bad guy? The villain of this story? Taking a quick look back on your life and yeah, maybe. To be honest, it does sound right.

“So annoying,” He mutters as he turns away, doing whatever a swordsmith does not that you would have any way of knowing what that is, "Every time I saw you, you had that stupid grin on your face as if there's no thought swirling in that empty head. So why the hell are you so dead all of a sudden anyway? It's creepy."

Wow.

Just, wow. It's alright. Just be chill, [Name], be the bigger person, and just breathe. Do not get infuriated— Ah, f*ck it.

"You call me creepy?" A gasp leaves you, followed by pointing an accusing finger at him, "Let me tell you creepy, alright mister. You guys are the ones who all wear the same mask, that's weird! No joke, do you know how hard it is for me to tell you all apart? Very hard, it's impossible! Do you even have a clue how embarrassing it is to constantly mistake everyone? Never in my life did I have to apologize as often as I did the last few days!"

Not that it matters at all to do so, in two weeks you will be gone and you have the feeling that you will never see this village and its inhabitants again in this lifetime. Still undecided if it's a good feeling or a bad one, but you can be the judge later when it's important.

"We hardly get any visitors anyway, and the ones we have tend to leave after three days," He shrugs, "No one would probably even bother wanting to tell us apart."

You nod in agreement, because yeah, it's pretty much what you thought. The only people who visit this village are the ones who want to get their sword and be done with it, and even if they have to stay a few days longer they would probably either just visit the hot spring, live on the expensive of the village and do nothing.

Basically, that is what Akio and you have been doing the whole time.

Great, no wonder they despise you even more, and you can't blame them. You are horrible, very rotten people. Karma will come kicking your ass again at this rate.

"Why not just, uh, make it easier for people to tell you all apart though?" You suggest and after you don't receive an answer, you continue to explain, "I mean, can't each and every one of you wear a unique-looking Hyottoko mask? Different eye shapes or eyebrows or I don't know, colors?"

"That's a lot of work," Haganezuka says without turning around, "And I have no idea if it's worth it at all, as I said, we don't get enough visitors to even think about such things."

That sounds kind of sad, and you frown.

Of course, you already know that you will not be visiting this place again, but still, there's going to be a future generation of Demon Slayers who are not a bunch of assholes like the current one and they sure as hell want to be able to tell them all apart, and more importantly get to know them.

"Well, it's just an idea, I guess," You sigh and look up at the ceiling, "Would be nice if I could recognize Hyō-chan at first sight and didn't confuse him with ten others beforehand."

He exhales like he doesn’t still believe the world could ever be so cruel as to have someone as whiny as you as a client for his precious swords. In his last life, he must have committed some serious sin to get punished to that extent.

Well, welcome to the club, good sir, because you too are asking yourself at least once a day why you're getting punished by simply existing.

But to your utter shock and confusion, instead of gracing you with any underhanded insult or muttering again what an annoyance you are, he actually takes his mask off, making you loudly gasp at the motion.

Is this real life? Is this just fantasy? Your mouth drops open, and you stare at him in awe.

"Can you stop staring?”

"No."

He is super tired of your unpredictable and childish behavior.In one moment you're all depressed and the next you're stupid and loud, but can he blame you? You always thought their masks were some sacred object they use to keep their identity secret at all costs and he just tosses the thing in the corner like it's a dirty rag.

"Sorry, I am just surprised that you have a very normal-looking human face." You blink still comprehending the turn of events, "For a moment I thought I would get greeted by an Abura Sumashi or something, you know, with you being all smug about scaring me to death."

"You do remember that I am forging your sword right? That I can easily pamper with it so that it breaks when you need it and everyone would think it was an accident?" He sends you an incredulous glare, "So how about you think twice about calling me an old potato-headed goblin?"

Is it suddenly getting really cold in this otherwise hot workshop, or is it just you? Heck, you're sure he's not even joking, so you're quickly turning into a bootlicker, "I think you have a very handsome appearance for your lacking personality, Haganezuka-san, I'm sure that's good enough on the marriage market!"

Nice, you are getting better at the whole being a polite and normal human.

It is not that you are lying. He does look like the Taisho Haganezuka but he just is not as handsome. In a sense, a normal-looking dude who is good-looking enough to have a few heads turned but nearly not as handsome as the Tsugikuni twins, or your two personal gremlins Hakuji and Akio.

But then again, you are super duper biased.

"If only you knew how much I despise you already. If it weren't for the fact that I get paid generously, I would never bother working on a sword for you," He snorts with laughter, shaking his head, "So you have met Hyōtokusu-kun?" He asks changing the subject without looking at you. Cleaning his tools is apparently more important than you and with his next question, he even manages to destroy the cozy atmosphere, "Did he let you use his precious doll or did he try to run when he saw you?"

"Both." A sigh leaves you as you avoid looking at Haganezuka, the same way you always try to avoid everything unpleasant, instead starting to scratch the ground with your finger. "First he was cheeky, then he cried, insulted us, became violent, and ultimately an excited child ready to show off his favorite toy."

"Well, it's not like I expected him to be a good kid, he is a brat," Haganezuka shrugs, "But him being violent is new."

Well, meeting the personification of egocentric can do that to a normally peaceful person.

You don't answer him, instead, you stare at the ground while stifling a laugh; one that would surely come off as too unamused, a bit too broken. But it was nice that you were almost distracted from your problem until you were reminded of it again.

"Alright, your mood swings are annoying. What is it?" He asks, clearly irritated by your constant moping, "Did something happen?"

Is it alright for you to say it out loud, even if it is coated with half-truths? Even if it's only a tiny bit? Even though it is pathetic?

Fingernails are digging into your soft palm, more and more until you feel a sharp pain, breaking the skin. But not even the sharp pain can distract you from feeling utterly hollow. With a heavy sigh tethering at the edges of your lips, you let your eyes rise from the ground only to be met with the intense stare of Haganezuka.

It is better than running, isn't it?

"The doll, you know? The one that Hyō is carrying around, reminds me of someone that I knew." And it is the truth, "But he’s dead now and I don’t think I can bear to look at it. I can even be near that thing without having the urge to run away. Which I actually did! It's pathetic, for f*cks sake, I am a Hashira who faced countless demons and felt not even the tiniest bit of fear but a stupid doll scares me so much that I start trembling the second I am near it."

Your breathing is getting uneven. Not even a second later, your throat closes up, and your lips tremble. A burning sensation appears in the corner of your eyes, but you do not cry. You have been trying to hold yourself together all day, and just because you say it out loud does not give you the right to break down.

"So you have been acting like a coward? I didn't think you were so spineless." You can practically hear the snarky expression on his face as he asks that, and it makes your blood boil but you can't even be angry, not when you know he's right.

"So what? Do I have not the right to feel that way just because I am a strong swordswoman, is that it? Because I'm supposed to be one the strongest, a pillar and hope for mankind or some sh*t, right?" You don't bother to hide the bitterness in your voice, but it seems like Haganezuka does not even care, "This work, this circ*mstance— The things I've seen, never having time to process these things. In order not to wake up screaming at night I have to get drunk so yeah maybe I'm acting like a f*cking child right now but god damn I think I have the right to."

"Well, you are being pretty pathetic right now. You chose to become a demon slayer, that's on you, and with that, you can't change the fact that you will see horrendous things that others can't even imagine," He replies without hesitation, stating the obvious and it takes everything in you to not jump him and choke him, "But the doll on the other hand, how about you grow a spine and deal with it already?"

Uhhh...Wow?

"I don't want to repeat my little outburst but did you miss the fact that I am having a full-blown panic attack when I am near that thing? How the hell do you want me to deal with it?" Your voice cracks as you say it, and you can't help but laugh at the absurdity of the situation.

"God, stop being so dramatic for once," He rolls his eyes, "What you need is to take a good look at the doll, accept the reality, and move on. There's no use crying over something you can't change."

"It's the same as telling a depressed person to quit being sad," You frown, "What the f*ck are you even saying?"

"You told me that he's dead. Then quit thinking about it already and focus on moving on. You're not the first person to lose someone they loved, and you won't be the last either," He states in a matter-of-factly voice and that is the moment where you want to scream, because no, no, that's not right, that's not how things work, not at all, "So stop acting like a f*cking baby, get your sh*t together."

His answer pains you; oh, it pains you so much to think about it. It feels like your heart is being ripped out of your chest and you don't even want to imagine the look on your face. He is only stating the obvious facts, just another bitter truth but this hurtful ache in your heart is nothing against the dread you feel to even think about looking at the doll's face.

"If it were that easy, don't you think I would? I just can't!" You raise your voice, a little out of frustration. You have to bite down on your lip so hard it draws blood in order to not lose yourself completely. This is a losing battle and you know it, but still, "It's not just about me just getting my sh*t together, I can't!"

"Stop being so stupid and listen to me for once! What are you so afraid of? It is just a sh*tty doll without any emotions, not a human who can judge you! " He shouts, and you finally meet his gaze, staring at him wide-eyed. He groans, letting his head fall back, "Did you ever mourn him? Or did you just shove him in the back of your mind and tell yourself he doesn't exist?"

"Wha—!"

"Do you have any idea how lucky you are?! I don't know how much the doll and the man you lost are alike but damn, others don't get that chance to look their loved one in the face one more time and say a proper goodbye. That's a privilege that not many get and yet you are acting like a wailing brat!" He shouts at you, "What a f*cking waste."

And with that, it clicks.

He is right, he is right, he's so right. It hurts, it hurts so much to think about it, but he's right, he's so f*cking right.

There is no guarantee that you will ever find and meet Michikatsu, maybe you have already missed him. There is also no guarantee that he can bring you the desperate salvation that you think you need to finally move on. You have lived and suffered for so long that you are sure you have changed beyond recognition, he may even look at you as if you are a stranger, and deep down, there is even a part of you that knows that seeing Michikatsu will not fix the pieces of your broken heart.

But right now, here in this exact moment— The doll that looks so eerily similar to Yoriichi, the man that you love, that you loved so much. A chance to have a closure on your own, a chance to make some sort of peace with the ghost that has haunted your steps for far too long. You owe that yourself. You owe that to him. Even though you owe him so much more than that, he deserved so much more than that.

With your eyes still glued on Haganezuka, your lips quiver, and your hands tremble. It is so scary, so overwhelming, to be confronted with your own truth, with the weight of the past, but—

"What are you waiting for, coward?" His voice is harsh, sharp as a razor, and he glares at you, "It's not like you will change the past anyway, so just stop wasting my time and go."

As mean as he is, he is the type of person who says what's on his mind, and he doesn't bother with beating around the bush. It's nice, really, you can't lie, it is nice to be called out on your bullsh*t.

"You're so mean but you are so right and I am so f*cking stupid," You mutter, not even bothering to hide the quiver in your voice, "Thank you Haganezuka-san."

Without wasting another moment, without bothering to hear his answer, you walk out of the workshop, taking deep breaths and swallowing the lump in your throat.

You know what you have to do.

You know what you want to do.

It is only a matter of finding the courage to actually do it.

Chapter 12: ACT II • Yūgen VII

Chapter Text

Heading back to the clearing, an invisible thread twists around your throat.

A foreign feeling welling deep in your chest tightens its hold over you as you embrace the darkness, returning like an old friend. The wind is silent. Your steps echo on the wood, marking each one like a funeral procession, only drawing closer and closer.

You can do it. You have to do it. One way or another, this is your opportunity.

You'll never find another chance like this again.

As you finally step into the clearing, you are greeted by the sight of Hyō in the process of cleaning up, his back to the trees behind him, and a smile on his face that is deprived of his Hyottoko mask. A tender expression that was almost childlike in its simplicity, except—when he notices the tension on your face—the smile changes to a slight frown.

"[Name]-san?" He calls out to you, "I thought you were going to sleep?"

Just behind him stands the doll, and you cannot be more grateful that it is standing motionless and silent, staring down at the ground with its back toward you. Seeing the so familiar silhouette alone brings already forth so much pain. Memories of despair flood into your mind. No matter how hard you try to chase the feelings of loss, grief, and regret, they claw at you until you are frozen like a statue.

Fingernails almost pierce the skin of your palms, but the pain is welcomed more than that aching sensation within the chest cavity as it beats rapidly.Like a film stuck on a loop, you can't let go of a life once known.

"I couldn't. I mean, not anymore," A lie easily slips past your tongue. "It's nothing. I just have trouble falling asleep sometimes." You explain as a hand reaches up and rubs the back of your neck, attempting to shake off any feelings of guilt for deceiving him.

His face scrunches up into that of concentration as if to think of a way to cheer you up. After some time, Hyō speaks, "Is it Haganezuka-san again? If you want, I can show you his weak points—"

"Don't worry. It's not him this time." A giggle, barely held back behind the palm of your hand, escapes from you. "But I am always happy to hear about his weaknesses."

His enthusiasm for the topic is a welcomed distraction for what is soon to follow, a pleasant distraction as he starts to rant on and on about all the things that have the blacksmith annoyed or ticked off in one way or another. As time slowly passes on, the boy doesn't notice when the smile slips from your face, and the only thing you can think about is what needs to be done.

"So then there's the fact that he—" Hyō continues his one-sided rant before you interrupt with your voice devoid of the former lightheartedness, and the boy instantly ceases talking to look over at you in confusion.

"Say, where's Akio? I haven't seen him since I left a few hours ago." You begin, shifting uncomfortably from one foot to the other as you glance around the clearing, trying not to linger with your gaze on the doll, "I thought he would still be here."

However, as Hyō doesn't notice anything wrong with the question, he shrugs his shoulders in response, stating, "He left when the sun went down, saying something about life being too short or whatever. Honestly, I don't know. He's probably frustrated because his attempts at training with the doll were, well, ridiculous, to say at least."

A snort leaves your lips at that, "Let me guess. He got his ass kicked because of his own stupidity, right? He surely started to get co*cky and tried to pull off some fancy moves that didn't work, huh?"

At that, Hyō breaks into a grin as he leans onto one of the wooden swords that are resting next to him, stating, "Yeah, exactly! I could only stare at it like, "What a dumbass," you know? Honestly, I'm no help to anyone if they refuse to listen to me or train properly!"

"Yes, yes. That's Akio. He can be a bit full of himself," Your laughter echoes through the night at Hyō's comically animated facial expression.

However, this laughter falls short soon enough when an epiphany reaches Hyō, who glances back to the doll before meeting you with his warm amber eyes full of questions. And it is then that you are met by one single question that leaves a sharp sting through your chest, "Did you come to train with the doll while no one is around, perhaps?"

Averting his gaze, your lips stretch open into a toothless grin, one that's both broken and sincere at the same time—a mixture of all the pain and sadness that keeps tugging at you as you gently shake your head. You can feel eyes boring into your skull; however, a million lies die a million times at the tip of your tongue.

Finally, the words finally leave your mouth with a nervous chuckle, "Yeah, I wanted to ask you something. I wanted to... If possible, would it be okay if I borrowed the doll until dawn? Just to see how I'm doing, I mean. There's no need for Akio and certainly no need for any witnesses to see me failing like an idiot."

For just one moment, Hyō stares you down. When he finds no malice, ill will, or insincerity, the corners of his lips lift up. The boy's gaze softens; his guard has fallen right through your palm, leaving nothing between you and the toy.

"Of course, you can train with it," He begins with a smile, already placing the mask back onto his face, covering his true expressions and feelings—a comforting part of his personality. "But I'd have you keep something in mind, though."

"What's that?"

"You are going to fail, probably, since it's going to be your first time," His voice is cold, and his sentence is delivered without a hitch. You watch him closely as Hyō fiddles with the loose ends of his haori jacket, not once looking in your direction while remaining fixated on the toy next to him. "I hope you don't mind, but it's the truth."

"Oh, I already assumed that," You chuckle, brushing aside the comment. Your eyes are hollow, void of feeling, and empty of life as a serene smile that is little more than the appearance of a calm surface hiding the tumult that lies beneath stretches across your lips, "But I guess I have to try, right? At the very least, I know this isn't an easy thing. But who cares? It doesn't matter. If I fail, I fail. It wouldn't be the first time. I'll do my best, though."

As Hyō's feet lead him towards the heart of the trees again, disappearing into the shadows with a carefree wave in your direction, he adds as he turns his back to you, "Well, do your best. To activate it, you have to turn the key. Oh, and I recommend using the wooden katanas instead of the real ones. Just in case, you know?"

Then he's gone.

And now you stand there silently, you, yourself. All alone with the dark, empty clearing around you. There's silence, filled only by your heartbeat thumping erratically in your ears and the sounds of wind blowing across the plains.

The stars glitter high above, watching the events unfold without blinking as though amused at what they witness happening below them. The moon hangs high, not paying attention but eavesdropping. Gaze drifting around, your attention stops at the doll once more, which is immersed in his still and unmoving state.

A fever has seized hold of your soul; your blood runs cold in your veins.

You try to stop the shakiness in your legs, but it doesn't help at all. Before coming here, the logical part of your mind yelled at you, warning you again and again that this is going to hurt so much when you remember whom the doll was based on: an individual you lost to time itself.

Your hands tremble; your knees feel weak.

This feeling? You know it so well; you felt it once, all those years ago, when you woke up in yet another era. It's a terrible, frightful fear, afraid to turn and see that your memories have become wrong.

That you began forgetting his face, or maybe just not quite remembering all of his features clearly in your mind. That the ghost that haunts your dreams isn't even a memory anymore, and that every day this memory somehow distorts a little further from reality to the point where it is hardly recognizable, and looking over the mechanical doll in front of you reminds you just how useless your feelings are against the clock that is ticking mercilessly, fading your memory further and further away.

No matter how long he lives in your thoughts or how much you claim to love him, these are all fruitless endeavors as he grows farther away from the touch of your fingertips and is just beyond your reach.

You want to desperately look away, and yet at the same time, you long to gaze upon him.

Once your eyes fall on the man again, he will be unable to slip away from your memories. His appearance will once again be fixed in your mind's eye, unable to disappear. Once you meet the dead, red-colored irises, there will be no backing away once those memories begin flowing inside your head again, reaching straight into your heart and devouring you whole.

Slowly, rain cascades down from the heavens, softening the hard ground beneath your feet, bringing comfort as much as sorrow to you. The refreshing droplets caress your face, tracing a path down your jawline, delicately rolling down your cheekbones and eyelashes.

Releasing a shaky breath, you place a hand over your heart. It's beating steadily, yet its pounding is audible.

One shaky step at a time, with your gaze, turned to the ground. Steps that feel so heavy, as if stones were holding them down for you, steps that feel like they will take forever and never end, but they do when you see the familiar sandals and the black hakama pants.

An arm's length, and yet it feels like an eternity stands between you and that doll. So close and yet so far; it's now or never. Take one final step or flee from what's right in front of you.

You let your eyes wander higher, seeing the red haori he always wore, and with trembling hands, you reach out, touching, feeling how familiar they are to the touch. You know that they feel this way, and yet you have forgotten.

It's only now, when you touch them again, that you remember.

They feel real—as real as he was once.

With fingers curling around the fabric, you cling to it as if he would fade away like dust and ashes again at any moment.

Your gaze travels upwards and lands on his hair. It's a beautiful shade of red that you once loved so dearly before the sight of this specific tone of red began to remind you of all the pain, blood, and loss you suffered. Gently you brush a strand of hair away from the doll’s face. There was a time you used to play with and braid his hair when you were bored, even though those moments have been forgotten.

And with these red locks, you also notice the Hanafuda earrings. No, not his, but a cheap replica. His are should be the Kamado family, physical evidence of his legacy, but those that adorn the doll's ears are just a reminder, a mocking representation.

A grim reminder. Your hand comes towards where your own would have been, a habit you thought you had grown out of, and with that movement, you realize that yours are lost. Gone forever, just as the bracelets you gifted them.

You come to a halt and shut your eyes, trying to calm yourself before you open your lids again. And then—

—You see him.

For a fraction of a second, the illusion wavers and dissipates: The doll vanishes, revealing to you a painfully familiar individual and your beloved.It is like staring at the sun after years of being locked in the dark. It sheds light on things you barely remember, on words that remind you of a faraway time, and on feelings you thought were long lost.

Eyes that are full of life and affection accompanied by a smile full of warmth reserved only for you and nobody else. You can't look away, you are hypnotized and drawn to the light, and you are terrified of being surrounded by nothing but pitch-black again. It is not real; you know that it is just an echo of the past, a mirage of your own cruel imagination.

It is not real.

But it is so close to being real, so close to feeling like it was real.

Your eyes are burning; your throat is burning. Your chest is burning, and your entire body is burning, and yet it's as if someone poured icy water over you and made you shiver.

Desperately, you want to believe in this delusion.

That you are basking in the warmth and light of the sun itself instead of the darkness of the night with the sky crying at your misery. That your beloved is truly standing in front of you, with a beating heart and blood flowing through his veins, instead of him being long forgotten, six feet under the ground.

And that he is going to stroke your head and tells you that the last decade was nothing but a nightmare, that you didn't fail him all those years ago. That the price you have to pay for that one mistake is no longer your life, that there is still a future ahead of you, a future that you would get to share with the people you love.

That Michikatsu never turned into a demon, never committed these awful sins against humanity, and never left behind the remains and pieces of your precious bond shattered beyond repair on the ground like a broken mirror. That he never lost himself in the darkness of the hatred and pain, he felt.

That all your friends were waiting at the estate and did not die one after another like disposable chess pieces all alone and so painfully they wish they have never picked up a sword, to begin with. That they are not lying in graves that soon will be forgotten, that they are not food for worms.

It's so easy to pretend it's real, so easy to let your guard down, closer and closer, wanting to feel his warmth. You extend your hand, pleading to the gods that please, just one more time is all you need—

It's so cold.

The tips of your fingers touching the smooth ceramic of the doll, it's cold enough to burn right down to your soul; freezing you from the inside out. There's no shine in these hollow eyes, focusing on you, and yet at the same time, nothing at all. And the illusion is shattered, and again, you are enveloped by nothing but darkness, and reality is harshly shoved back into your face, leaving you completely and utterly alone once again, and your arm falls to the side, limp like a rag doll.

The world feels like it's spinning. Your fingers are cold. It is like the night air is turning the blood in your veins into ice. Your stomach is knotted up as though someone has their fist curled around your guts, twisting them and squeezing them together.

You are coming to understand that you don’t see him, don’t hear him, don’t feel him; he is dead and gone.

Your face contorts into a pained grimace upon realizing the bitter truth, forcing you to your knees, with a hand covering your mouth as a muffled scream passes through your lips. The only thing left behind is your agony; it is all you are and all you'll ever be.

Tears brimmed at the corners of your eyes, threatening to run over, yet, you refused them, not allowing you to feel sorrow and burying deep your emotions to the brink of ruination. The misery on your tongue tastes like honey, sticky and impossibly sweet; drowning everything else out in its sweetness.

Yet there remains something foul behind it, bitter and nauseating; a taste worse than bile.

He is never coming back.

And you've known that for years; however, you miss him. You miss him so, so much. You don’t want to be alone. You want to die; you want to stay here, frozen in time, in this moment. They are all gone and never coming back; you know that too well. It's engraved into every cell of your body, never forgotten, and ever-present like a plague that keeps devouring you from the inside out.

But it is beyond your comprehension why it is you who must come back to the living trapped in this hellish world you find yourself existing within when everyone else had died centuries ago.

Why do you have been doomed to live in pain and agony, knowing that even if you wanted to end your suffering, final rest would elude your grasp for eternity?

Still, you remain.

You will always remain.

The sole survivor; as broken beyond repair you are, as shattered you feel, you have to move forward.

It doesn't matter what you want. It doesn't matter what you feel. You can pretend, and pretend, and pretend, but you can't change the unchangeable; your pain will eat you alive, consume your entire existence, and swallow your entire being like a black hole does with the dying star it sucked the life from.

No tears will erase your heartache, no act of desperation can bring them back, no cry will lessen your anguish, and no prayer will amend your fault. It is not fair.

It's never been fair; it will never be fair. Nothing in this world is fair, and you are well aware of that fact. To let go and make peace with them all, but how can you be at peace with a life left half-done and unfinished?

How can you bear to live on without them all and pretend that their loss doesn't torment you?

The truth is, you can't.

But you have to, just like everyone else who was left behind, who lost everyone they love, who never got the chance to say goodbye or apologize or tell them how much they really mattered to them.

There is no way out of the labyrinth of suffering and despair except forward; as difficult as it might be, you have to keep going, keep walking, and keep living. Even when everything is just so painful and unbearable to bear; you have to find ways to cope with the sadness, to come up with ways of moving on and living with the loss, to slowly rebuild a semblance of happiness again, if at all possible.

So you cry; cry with all your heart.

You grieve; grieve for everything and everyone that was lost, and you keep going because that's what you must do.

And there is one last goodbye that burns on your lips.

A last goodbye that you've always been afraid of, that you always try to avoid, but a goodbye that is so necessary and yet so difficult to say, that is lodged in your throat, that it keeps you up at night. And the moment that you finally allow yourself to say that one last goodbye, your heart will shatter for the last time, and your soul will break beyond repair.

That goodbye, however, will mark an ending and a beginning at the same time: an end to the nightmares, to the tears, the sorrow, and regret that consumes your every thought, and an awakening within your soul that will give you the strength to push forward and live on for another day without him by your side.

"I am sorry that I couldn't keep my promise to you. That I left you behind and put you through so much pain because of my selfishness," Your voice breaks, barely a whisper, as you finally gather your courage and finally manage to speak those words to a figment of your imagination. "But I pray that we will never see each other again, not in the next life or any other."

A part of you dies right there and then, and your heart shatters and shatters and shatters.

As the heavy rain pours from the sky above, you swear that you feel something touch your cheek, just briefly—it could easily be mistaken for the gentle wind or even your imagination running wild with longing. It doesn't stop you as you speak a name. The name you haven't said in so long, the name you will always remember, even if every trace of it vanishes from every corner of the earth.

"Goodbye, Yoriichi."

And just like that, with the pain that seems never-ending, a chapter that ended.

A story that has come to an end, a tragic love that was never meant to be, and as you carefully lay the doll back onto the wooden box it belongs to, gazing at his face one last time, you smile, almost a broken smile.But one that shows everything in your heart and soul.

You take a deep breath, saying one last goodbye to everyone that came before. Every person you had come to know, every part of your life, every memory that ties them to you is over, leaving nothing but a dull ache and the echoes of their ghosts in their wake.

"Oh yeah, before I forget. When I see your brother again, I will take care of him." You chuckle softly, and with that, you softly close the lid of the box, leaving the doll behind, letting the rain wash away the traces of your presence.

And so, with the sound of the pouring rain hitting the earth beneath your feet, and the dim light of the full moon above, you turn your back and leave it all behind. Slowly making your way back to the village, with your hand placed over your chest, a sad smile remains on your lips, and the burning sensation of tears pooled at the corners of your eyes refuses to leave.

It's your final moment, a closure you've always needed for all that has come before and a start for what comes after.

A story of love and grief and a tragic ending in despair.

The walk back to the village is longer than you remember.

The softness of the earth beneath your feet and the warm rain on your face turn everything around you into mud, a muddled and blurred mess that matches the feelings trapped inside you: tangled, twisted, and complicated.

There are no people nor any signs of life to be seen, making your mind wander back to an era long forgotten and leaving a sense of melancholy and isolation as you continue to trudge along the lonely and familiar dirt road. Your heart continues to ache; the pain is still raw as it has ever been.

But it is alright; this was the first bridge you had to burn. And even though it hurt to burn away a part of your memories, it was something that had to be done to keep your mind sane and alive. With each stride, you are closer to what comes next, knowing that tomorrow will not be worse than today. And it can only get better.

So you hold your head high and fight back the urge to cry or scream again.

And definitely do not look in any mirror any time soon. You must look atrocious with bloodshot eyes and dried tears everywhere, and that would just add salt to your wounds at this point, so that's definitely a no-go.

As you arrive at the building you have been staying in for the last two weeks, a thought suddenly occurs to you. One that makes you shiver once again.There's also another problem; it's called Akio.

You hope that he is asleep or at least already too drunk to give a f*ck; you don't need anyone else witnessing the absolute wreck you must be currently. God, you actually beg that the universe would give you a little bit of mercy and Akio would somehow not be in your shared room at all.

It is laughable, honestly. Fate is not usually that kind to you.

Anyway, you steel yourself for whatever bullsh*t is about to hit the fan, or anyone for that matter. Exhaling loudly, you mentally count down from five before swinging the sliding doors of the room open to see Akio in all his glory.

Alas, you're not that lucky, after all, given how quickly he sits upright and fixes his eyes on you, gaze piercing you like a thousand knives stabbing directly into your back. The sh*t-eating grin that appears on his face tells you everything you need to know. And before you can even think of running away from the storm that you caused, the blonde-haired bastard sprinted from his position and lunged toward you, grabbing ahold of your shoulders and forcefully turning you in his direction.

f*ck.

Well, there goes any plan of you somehow sneaking in quietly and hoping the prick hadn't noticed a damn thing. In the span of a second, all hopes that you can brush this off and pretend none of this ever happened disappeared into smoke.

"Did you cry, little Hime?" He co*cks his head to the side and takes in the sight, not bothering to hide a bit of satisfaction as his eyes narrow. "You sure look like a miserable mess. Something you like to share, perhaps?"

"What, no. I did not cry. Did you go blind or something?" You huff and cross your arms over your chest, wincing slightly at the very obvious lie that leaves your lips. Way to go, you idiot.

"Right. And that's why your face looks like a combination of red, blotchy, and tear-stained," He smirks, poking your cheek repeatedly and making you visibly cringe, especially after his description, "Of course, the red-eyed panda look suits you incredibly well, but I'd prefer the constantly tired look, to be honest. With the eyebags and nonexistent will to live. Makes it seem like we have some sort of couple look."

A wave of silence followed those words, with you shifting your weight between your feet and trying desperately not to punch him in the face. Still, at some point, it was impossible not to feel frustrated, especially when Akio's piercing golden eyes watched your every move, analyzing and taking in every detail.

"If you've done checking me out, can we please drop it, Akio? There's nothing worth knowing here. You must be seeing things," Your words ooze with sarcasm, a defensive reaction you immediately realize when the blonde's smile widens, bordering on co*cky and entirely amused, "Maybe you are just drunk? The audacity to get wasted without me. You hurt my fragile heart."

His fingers grab at his own chest, the action earning an eye roll and a snort from you. However, this conversation did nothing but distract you from your terrible attempt at changing the subject, as you hadn't realized that Akio had begun eyeing the muddy trail that leads up to his room, specifically the mud-covered footprints imprinted on the wooden floor and disappearing into the darkness of the hallway.

Damn it.You do not want to be the person who's gonna clean that, and certainly, you aren't nice enough to offer help.

However, while you would expect him to say some smartass comment about it, he just stares intently at the floor as if the answers to all of life's mysteries are written on it. After a few moments of excruciating awkwardness, he snaps his eyes up to meet yours.

"Oh, you traitor. Did you seriously go train with that stupid doll without me? No, scratch that. Did you seriously go train with it by yourself in the dark, with no witnesses?" The grin that bloomed across his features makes your gut twist, the sight alone enough to send you screaming for the hills.

sh*t. f*ck. Oh, and crap. You frantically scramble to think up anything, anything that will convince him otherwise, "Akio, it wasn't—"

"No, no, no, there's no excuse, my dear Hime. Do not try to feed me some nonsense right now. You went ahead and trained with it alone, didn't you?" He quirked an eyebrow, a grin forming on his lips as his hands slid onto his hips.

"It was a spur-of-the-moment decision. I was just curious as to how the doll's mechanics work," With defeat washing over you, your shoulders slump, your whole form slouches in exhaustion, and you stare at him through half-lidded eyes, quickly distracting him from your half-lie, "Stop teasing me; I've had enough, I am soaked to the bone and if I don't change I am gonna die because of a stupid cold."

"Very pathetic," Akio nodded, patting your wet head affectionately before taking a step back, "Don't worry; I'll make sure the funeral is very elaborate and dramatic. I will give a melodramatic speech while sobbing uncontrollably and exposing all your dirty secrets. Just the way you deserve it."

"Thanks, Akio. My highest form of appreciation," Sarcasm dripped from every syllable as you began to take slow and steady steps away from Akio's judging gaze, walking toward the place you know that there are some spare garments. Well, more like you will just take Akio's clothes.

"At least let me play some sad music! Did you know I can play the flute?" His words reached you from behind, "And the shamisen! Trust me. I'd make it a funeral worth remembering!"

"Go find yourself some skill before spitting such nonsense. Musically talented, my ass." You wave your hand dismissively, but there's a smile playing on your lips, betraying the sincerity of your statement.

As you reach the area where the clothes are stacked, you dig through them until you find something that is not ripped, bloody, or stained, which was quite hard, if you have to be honest. And yes, these clothes belong to Akio, who loves to say that everything that is yours is his and vice versa. Your clothing is the perfect example of that, which is stupid because he's much taller and bigger than you.

Just when you were about to strip off all your clothes and drown yourself in the familiar warm embrace of a fresh change, you can hear Akio ungracefully flopping down on his futon, with his typical annoying commentary flowing through the room, "So, are you planning on telling me what happened, or am I going to have to drag it out of you like the shameless man that I am? Because trust me, I'll have it out of you before you can even blink."

"Can't the moment of your death be sooner?" The question came out naturally as you finished changing, not even glancing his way as your voice trailed. You fold your muddy, soaked clothes on a nearby wooden stool, making it ultimately a problem for someone that isn't you.

"I adore you, but my god, you'd seriously make a terrible wife," Akio sighed loudly and overdramatically, throwing an arm across his forehead like a Victorian damsel suffering from a fainting spell, "Hakuji must have had a stroke or thought you were someone else when he asked you to marry him."

"Ha! Bold of you to assume that I wouldn't know that already," Your tone was far too dry, far too unbothered, and all you wanted to do was crawl back into your bed, cover your head in blankets, and not talk about yet another problem of yours until the end of time, "You cannot hurt me with this truth anymore."

"Right, the most beautiful, tragic, and tragicomic love story of this era," Akio dramatically wiped his eyes with his sleeve, acting so ridiculous that it should have made you annoyed or even enraged, except that it was almost comforting to see his theatrics, as ridiculous as it may be, "Truly the stuff of poetry, no, of legends!"

Oh boy, if he already thinks that Hakuji and your little love story, or whatever it is, seems like a tale from a legend, he surely would have a field day if he ever knew about Yoriichi and you—

f*ck, you need to stop. You just let go, and you already think about him again.

"At least I have a love life. As pathetic as it is, it's better than having none at all," You quip as you plop down on your own futon beside him, resting your chin on top of your propped-up knee, "Now stop talking about him. I'm too tired to be feeling sorry for myself."

A frown was all he gave you, a sign that he understood the depth of your mood, and despite his usual antics, he recognized the time for that was not now. Akio then rolled onto his stomach, head tilted slightly to the side, studying your face and analyzing everything you've shown him so far. And his gaze drilled into you, taking every small detail, every movement, every breath that escaped you.

After a few excruciating moments of silence, your friend speaks up, "Come on, your best friend and favorite annoying pain in the ass can keep your darkest secrets and help you through them, yeah?I would say by now, I know you better than myself."

It almost made you choke, but you forced yourself to take a breath, clearing the lump forming in the back of your throat and focusing your eyes on his intense amber ones, refusing to let him know what thoughts ran through your head at his words.

"You're unbelievable. Can't we just call it a night?" You almost sniffle pathetically. At Akio's unamused expression, you groaned and shifted your weight, attempting to remain calm despite theturmoil rising inside, "Seriously. It was just me testing the waters, getting used tothe dollIand its movements."

"Testing the waters, my ass," His eyebrow arched higher, "Youtrainedwith it. So, tell me. How did it go?"

How did it go?

It felt as if a part of your soul was being reaped from your body with a dull knife, the agony tearing and twisting your heart and crushing the remains into dust. Your memories flashed and echoed throughout your mind like a dam bursting forth, sending a torrent of painful recollections into every corner. All you could do was scream internally, wishing that you could simply claw and tear out whatever emotional attachment you may have, knowing that they only bring misery and suffering upon you.

"Terrible. Absolutely terrible," You lie again, this time far more believable and convincing, even going so far as to look utterly despondent, "It's stupid, and I'm never touching it again. You can have fun with it, but I'd never let you catch me so much as looking in its direction."

It felt wrong to say, even more so to lie, but seeing Akio beam excitedly, you found you didn't regret the words leaving your mouth. Even when they brought you no relief or respite, the lies rolled off your tongue. You didn't regret them one bit when Akio spoke up excitedly.

"Thank you! I swear it's looking at me like I'm a bug it wants to squish when it's idle. Something about that thing gives me the f*cking heebie-jeebies, to be honest." He snickers, the words a mumble as he runs a hand through his long hair, "Anyway, for you to feel so sh*tty about training with it that you decide never to go anywhere near it? You must have really had a bad run."

"Yeah, I heard from Hyō-chan that your attempt was f*cking ridiculous, to the point where you did more running away than actually hitting anything," You cackle in amusem*nt at how disappointed he looked, "Was it truly that bad? It sounds like your confidence has suffered an irreversible blow."

You are not above poking fun at his wounded ego, laughing at him even if his expression turned more pout than pouty, and even with a hand coming towards you, ready to ruffle your already messy hair into an even more unruly disaster.

"Okay, wow, not what I meant," He exclaims, not showing you any mercy, "I was just having an off day. Everyone's gotta have those, right? Plus, I at least did not cry like some miserable loser just because I got my ass whooped."

"Must you always be so salty? For real. Why are you such an angry little man?" You respond, slinging a pillow at his face and getting him to shut up when the fluffy object lands right smack dab against his mouth, making him snort and chuckle softly, a sound that never fails to brighten even the bleakest days, "Why am I friends with you, honestly?"

"Oh, the real question is, why do I continue to associate myself with you when you've brought nothing but trouble and despair to my humble existence." His response comes almost automatically, but the mischievous twinkle in his eyes betrays any bite or seriousness he might have initially intended.

"Shame that a wonderful and supportive friendship like ours must be lost, ruined, and thrown away like the trash we both are," You try to smack him playfully, a fake grimace on your features that slowly shift to an unbearable fondness that always seems to linger whenever you are near him.

Akio throws a hand over his chest, rolling onto his side to look at you, still sprawled on his futon messily, with his messy, disheveled hair framing his face perfectly and creating a contrast against the darkness around him. And when he flashes that mischievous grin, you are left once again at a loss as to why this man has become your closest friend when he is so obnoxious, inappropriate, and utterly exhausting to be around.

He opens his mouth to speak, clearly mocking and exaggerating, and yet somehow also completely sincere, "You were a gift that my miserable existence needed, Hime. It would be such a shame to let that go."

You groan, covering your face in a last-ditch attempt to hide your blush at his ridiculous comment. Before he can begin teasing you for becoming a bright pink mess, you hurriedly mumble, "Whatever, asshole. Go to bed now; your ugly face is disturbing me."

"Ugly? Hime, let's be real, you seem to have your eyesight quite screwed up because there is a very handsome man lying beside you!" He quipped, his face lighting up with each syllable.

"Shut it," Is all you can bring yourself to utter, too exhausted and emotionally drained to deal with his relentless teasing and comments, "My sanity cannot handle you anymore."

As the two of you break into a comfortable silence, Akio shifts this time closer to you, the distance between the two futons practically disappearing and leaving only a narrow gap between his warmth and your cool exterior. The room falls quiet; nothing but the soft rustle of leaves can be heard in the night's dead air.

The stillness lingers for a few moments before being disturbed by Akio's dramatic sigh, shattering the peaceful moment you just started to indulge yourself in. Lord, what did you do to deserve this sh*t?

"How about we go and give it one more try? Whack that stupid doll's non-existent ass? You know, revenge for our wounded egos," He continues without waiting for any response, "Well, your wounded ego. I mean, mine is at its peak already and has a f*cking reason to be."

You ignore him entirely, pointedly closing your eyes, preparing for another round of fruitless struggling that only ends with you barely remaining sane. An eventful day always finds a way to exhaust you beyond your limit. He moves around some more, shifting on his futon as you remain with your face buried beneath a blanket, silently willing for sleep or death; you are not picky, to take you.

This goes on for about twenty agonizingly long minutes; only after hearing his constant shuffling and grunts and occasional snide commentary did he stop moving, opting instead to poke your cheek to gain your attention, "Are you all sulky and moody now and just gonna ignore me until your eyes go back to their natural, less shiny, state, huh, little Hime?

After five or six attempts, you give up. There is no use, is there? Akio will whine, grunt, and toss his blankets until you cave or one of his legs accidentally smack right on the back of your head. Instead of fighting him and his stubborn nature, you'd prefer just to save the few brain cells you might have left after these years of suffering.

With a huge sigh, you flutter your lashes open, annoyed by Akio and your own inability to fall unconscious already. When you stare back at him, half expecting the worst and already beginning to mentally prepare yourself for the hell and a half you are about to get.

"Your attempts to mock me will remain pathetic, "The urge to roll your eyes at his childish manner is immeasurable, "And no, I'd rather chew glass and swallow it than do this nonsense you suggest."

"Come on; we'd destroy it for sure. Where's the faith, the team spirit? Together we can accomplish anything—" You'd have punched him if he didn't move away so rapidly, just narrowly missing getting the offending limb right in the gut. How irritating, "Or not."

You pinch your temples, sensing the beginning of a dreadful headache already pulsing behind your forehead. What the hell does this idiot even expect from this? He's delusional, most likely from either lack of sleep or all the alcohol you both consume, which has to be at least half the reason he behaves this way; no healthy human brain could allow you to survive all of this stupidity in your life.

With an incredulous and downright weary look, you sit upright, studying his dumb, stupid, ridiculous smiling face until it feels like you want to just strangle the bastard out of habit. You have no faith in this madness that Akio is currently plotting, knowing his taste for mayhem.If there is any opportunity to hit something repeatedly, make everything burn, or generally cause everyone headaches and damage property, Akio will find and accomplish all that if given the chance.

"There is something undiagnosed about you. Seriously, get your head checked because you don't even understand the meaning of a simple no," You hiss at him and watch with deep exhaustion the way his entire being perks up like a puppy listening to the sweet sound of a leash jingling, "Has that simple concept become a mystery to you over time, or are you just stupid?"

"Harsh, but to answer your question. Just a little bit stupid, thank you." He draws the words, pretending that he's genuinely hurt, only drawing a roll of your eyes as an acknowledgment from you, "Regardless, just consider how satisfying it will be. Plus, no limitations on violence. The opportunities for destruction are endless. Hell, Hyō can probably just repair it. So no consequences!"

This makes you pause.

Despite how obnoxious Akio's whole method to sway you into this madness is, that doesn't seem like such a bad idea, to be honest. The chance to whack the sh*t out of that thing for days, with no consequences nor the need to worry about its health, maybe it could help you, even more to let go of the memories you had associated with that mechanical doll.

It might be an excellent way to, yes, vent out some steam and also to let go of those feelings.

Now if Akio gets so focused on his destructive tendencies instead of focusing on how miserable you feel in the aftermath, that just means bonus points for you, even if only for a few hours. Who knows? Maybe a violent catharsis to put an end to all these stupid thoughts would make you feel good. In the grand scheme of things, there is literally nothing for you to lose.

"If I agree, then will you finally give me some f*cking sleep in peace and quiet, leaving me and my cranky ass alone?" Your voice cracks slightly despite every effort made to keep them steady while trying desperately to ignore everything else going through your mind.

In an unexpected act of wisdom, Akio keeps his lips pressed shut, allowing a pregnant pause to stretch into eternity between the two of you, watching you, scrutinizing and evaluating every small detail with those damned golden eyes and your reactions as if he's looking for any signs that this might be the most moronic mistake of the century.

Or, at the very least, the middle ground that won't kill you both or doom the whole village and the near surrounding areas to oblivion.

"Say, Hime, could it be that you need a hug, perhaps? Because you are certainly projecting some serious, depressing cuddle energy. Maybe even a dose of my soothing and calming presence, my words of encouragement—" He begins his speech in a far too loving and sentimental way, with his eyes closing and his chin lifted, the usual pride that radiates from him during his moments shining bright at that moment.

Without thinking twice, you quickly lift your hand and press it firmly over his mouth. You block his breath just enough to stop him from speaking, hopefully shutting up whatever nonsense he is about to sprout. Tiredly you look at him, and you feel his hot breath hit your hand, giving you the reminder that, unfortunately, he does breathe. That's a shame.

In the silence that followed, Akio's face changed at the sight of the despair lingering in your eyes. Without thinking twice, the blonde pulled you into his arms, letting you press your face against the crook of his neck while his hand patted the back of your head in comfort. His embrace was strong, and he let the warmth of his body envelop you without expecting any response, without demanding any more.

It was more than you deserve, and you know that, especially with his whole antics of constantly causing chaos and making you wish to murder him on multiple occasions. But he still cares, he really does, and somehow in all of this, you ended up growing a dependency on him that was dangerously close to becoming unhealthy.

Not that you would ever admit to that.

Instead of saying a word, you let your hands grasp his sleeve like a life rope, clinging to him as he rubbed small circles on your back with a gentleness that seems impossible coming from someone that resembles a dog barking and bouncing around just to get your attention.

And yet, when he shifts away ever so slightly, pushing your face to look directly into his, and without so much as a thought of shame or awkwardness, a mischievous light dances in his eyes, "Man, you really are a loser, huh?"

"Wow."

All you can do is offer a dumbfounded expression as you immediately start slapping him and trying to punch him anywhere you can land a hit on, earning nothing more than a pained laugh from Akio, who is still embracing you with his arms tightly wrapped around your midriff. It is infuriating! Why is this idiot always messing everything up when you're having a moment?

Unable to wrench yourself away from him, even with your futile attempts to pry off his arms, all you can do is sit there, almost seething as you listen to his insane cackling that gradually grows softer and slower, eventually dissolving into the silence that lingers.

Then comes the sound of his loud, brash voice, "You sensitive, emotional crybaby. Since when did you turn so soft on me, huh, princess?"

For f*ck's sake!

You are going to choke him to death; the rage flowing through your veins is beyond any understanding or comprehension, and with a sudden burst of strength, your elbow meets his stomach, hard and unforgiving, grinning with wicked satisfaction as he chokes, wheezes, and gasps, his arms finally losing their hold on you.

Now, that's a satisfying sight.

Your grin widens as the bastard lies sprawled over his futon, curling inward on his side and grimacing in pain, but his smile remains firmly glued to his face. If the idiot is hurt or annoyed, or truly humiliated, he does not show it once, knowing exactly how to play it all off with a smile. He groans slightly, his eyes narrowing, as he slowly begins to uncurl his upper half and sit upright.

Then his lips quirk slightly at the corner, a mischievous and cruel smirk, one you know all too well and usually spells disaster for you.

Akio reaches out to wrap his fingers around your arm, dragging you unceremoniously toward him, not caring how hard or fast he is pulling on your limbs. And like a rag doll, he is free to do whatever he pleases and tosses you closer to his chest, keeping you locked in his embrace and smooshing your face right against him.

It's pure, absolute bullsh*t! Unbelievable!

The blonde ignores the sound of your complaints, chuckling to himself and playing with your hair as if he does not care that you are very likely on the verge of decapitating him. You sigh, not bothering to remove yourself, instead melting against him as you rest your head on his chest and listen to the calming rhythm of his heartbeat, letting its sound wash over you.

You are gonna kill him one day.

But until that happens, maybe, you will wake up tomorrow to an uneventful day, and you can keep pretending everything is fine, that you have not been reborn from the ashes of the past, and that you still have some semblance of innocence and grace left inside your heart. The trick is to wait for the day it stops hurting and leave the haunting memories behind you.

Until then, at least, Akio's chaotic nature and presence brought you a little distraction from the void in your chest, one that seems impossible to fill or to soothe. Even if no amount of comic relief or distractions can ever fill that emptiness in your heart and can take away the lingering bitterness, it's something you can appreciate as you breathe in his comforting warmth and allow yourself to succumb to your exhaustion.

With your eyes closed and his heartbeat as an anchor, a steady, continuous, calming rhythm to focus on, you finally begin to drift off to sleep, unaware of the exact moment you give in and fall unconscious.

There is a strange calm within, an unbreakable, unmoving strength that never wavers; an aura of self-confidence and poise, a perfected and flawless masterpiece that even the master sculptor would struggle to replicate. He was graceful, dignified, and elegant, with a presence that demanded attention with just a single glance or movement.

And the said replica in the form of a mechanical doll is in the process of whopping Akio's ass once again, but this time you are present to witness it. And, to be quite fair, it is a glorious moment of defeat for the blonde, and totally deserved because the moment the sun rose on the horizon, he didn't even let you wake up properly as he dragged you to the clearing.

As the mechanical doll dives to deliver another devastating blow to your companion, you just sit off to the side with a bowl of rice balls, nibbling and snacking occasionally on one of the ones stuffed with sweet red bean paste, watching the blonde get beaten over and over again. It was certainly an entertaining spectacle to witness.

With your head resting on your hands, you can hear the crack and slam of each katana coming down, as well as the grunts and groans escaping Akio's lips and his continual string of insults that follow shortly after. This is a pure delight at the moment; how long has it been since you were allowed to relax and enjoy the sunlight and not stress and worry about anything?

Each second you sat there, each blow that your former lover's namesake delivered to Akio, you let out a snicker or two, only for a chuckle to eventually escape you, which gradually grew to a burst of full-blown laughter that you didn't attempt to silence.

Then you turn to Hyō, who also does not even tries to conceal his gleeful laughter, chuckling right alongside you, equally amused by the scene of the mechanical doll owning Akio in every meaning of the term.

"Which difficulty level did you set it on?" You question after some time, suddenly curious since the doll is already equipped with the real deal instead of the wooden swords. Besides, Akio does possess the mark coupled with his natural talent and skill; he shouldn't have that many problems.

But Hyō just shrugs and leans against the trunk of the tree, his arms folded over his chest, as an amused look flickers in his eyes, "Akio-chan asked me to increase the level to the maximum. He's crazy and not to mention suicidal."

You hum in acknowledgment. Yeah, that sounds about right, the absolute moron. No surprise there. And, of course, it was his decision. Still, you watch as the two continue to fight, finding no pity for your best friend, not when he dragged you out at an ungodly hour and forced you to watch the show that you are witnessing right now. He brought this misery on himself.

Another hard hit to his side, and he collapses, rolling onto his back and trying to catch his breath, wincing occasionally as he presses a hand against his injuries. Well, technically, Akio's still breathing. For now, that is. But given his bruised and bloodied cheek, his shoulder and wrist most likely dislocated, and the entire range of cuts and bruises scattered all over his body, who knows what damage he actually endured during his training?

If Akio's ego hadn't suffered any significant blows during all these sparring sessions, that's something else to praise. However, seeing the man's unyielding stubbornness, along with his sheer refusal to acknowledge and admit defeat, he must be thriving, thriving in agony and suffering.

A smile creeps up your cheeks as you pick yourself off the ground, walking toward your defeated best friend with a smug look written all over your face. Akio still refuses to move or say anything, just resting on his back with his arm draped across his eyes as he groans and whines pathetically to himself, much to Hyō's absolute delight.

The young blacksmith grins, his eyes glinting with amusem*nt as you gently nudge Akio's battered and bruised foot, making him wince and grimace and scowl back at you. It's delightful, really, and you snicker when you finally address him, "Akio, is the plan to get your ass whooped every time and pass it off as some kind of joke? Because you look absolutely ridiculous."

His lips curl into an involuntary smile as he watches you prod and tease him, "Is there no love, kindness, or gentleness in you, no ounce of concern for my well-being or my safety? Truly a demon hidden beneath the skin of a beautiful lady." He raises his voice, forcing the words out with all the drama and theatrics possible, hoping for a reaction or even an ounce of pity.

But all he gets in return is a scoff, a slight roll of your eyes before you resume with your teasing, "Someone's got to keep you humble and grounded, you delusional brat."

His eyelids flutter open, and with great effort, he manages to prop himself on his elbows and watch you as you kneel down beside him, cradling his hand between yours. He grunts, unable to get the words out at first, when suddenly a thought occurred to him, "Wait a minute. Didn't we say we would do this together, Hime? Why am I the only one doing anything."

Oh no.

You knew where this was going. You see the sparks in his eyes, the determination shining so bright that it is blinding. However, it seems that despite your efforts, there was no escaping the inevitable outcome.

Honestly, though, you had only planned on throwing some salt in his wounds and eating some delicious snacks before retreating and calling it a day, but before either of you knew it, the blonde sprung back to his feet with a spring in his steps, recovering enough strength to spring back into action, grinning like a madman.

In the blink of an eye, he swings his arm and yanks you, pinning you to him tightly and showing no sign of releasing you anytime soon. You struggle, fight back, even slapping and punching every area you can reach, earning yourself an extra tight hug and him snorting a laugh at your efforts, "Nice try, but no, it's time you face off this stupid thing while I laugh at your misery."

In the background, the sounds of his laughter and Hyō's cheering for him mingle, creating a terrible cacophony that reverberates through the air and sets you on edge. They are cruel, entirely devious, and evil bastards. Both of them deserve the cruelest end imaginable insults known to mankind, especially this obnoxious and stubborn blonde bastard who will not take no for an answer.

You cross your arms over your chest stubbornly and refuse to let him get a rise out of you as he carries you over to where the mechanical doll waits. Damn it. A sigh escapes your lips, your hands falling limply at your sides as Akio carries you and plops you down onto your feet, pushing his sword into your unwilling hands.

There are no options left, no excuses, and no reason to run away now.

While Hyō excitedly prepares the mechanical doll, Akio simply sits and watches, taking in every aspect of your posture and the expression on your face, trying to read into every crease and crack to find out what is brewing underneath the surface. But all you can muster is a simple look, one that screams your reluctance and dislike and conveys your message of giving him hell and back, which is adorable in his opinion, but he wisely holds his tongue for once.

"Are you ready, [Name]-san?" Hyō's words cut through the silence, bringing a tense quiet to the area that has the leaves on the trees rattling with nervous energy, or perhaps that was just you.

You do not know how to respond; there is no adequate way of saying your thoughts right now; how can words describe this awful turmoil rising and growing inside of you, threatening to burst forth and expose your greatest secret and pain for everyone present to witness and gawk? How does someone simply pretend they don't remember the overwhelming sense of recognition and nostalgia washing over as the mechanical doll fixed its gaze upon you, igniting emotions that no one had a right to make you feel?

With a deep exhale, you avert your gaze away from these lifeless eyes and steel yourself for whatever may come, quickly accepting Hyō's invitation, "Yeah, let's get this over with. It's just a stupid doll. How hard can it be?"

"Hime, maybe you should at least look at the doll and not the ground?" Akio pipes up, making you stiffen and give him a particularly nasty look, "It's kinda difficult if you can't see its movements and all."

What a way to state the obvious, Sherlock.

Your fingers tighten around the sword in your hand, clammy palms making you release a breath, a pathetic wheeze of pain as your body slowly goes through the motions to prepare for the fight, and like the fool that you are, you scream out the first excuse that your peasant’s brain comes up with, "I don't have to do sh*t. Besides, its face is ugly as f*ck. Gonna make me lose focus."

It's the stupidest excuse someone could ever come up with, something that's so far from the truth. You cringe internally the second those words leave your mouth, especially since you can hear both Akio and Hyō let out a gasp in utter disbelief, letting the world know how stupid and false they think your whole statement is.

"Are you f*cking blind, Hime?" Akio sounds as if you just told him that the earth is flat, not believing how utterly stupid someone can be, which is sending shivers racing across your skin when you turn towards their direction with a deadpan, "Seriously, are you?"

"Wow, you must really have bad taste in men if you think its face is anywhere near ugly," Hyō's commentary isn't helping, not even the slightest bit, not when his words sound so critical and honest, forcing you to bite your lip to silence your frustrations.

"This has to be the most beautiful man I have ever laid my eyes on, and that's just a replica!" The blonde continues, gesturing wildly at the mechanical doll like an exuberant child, "Its perfection, completely, absolutely gorgeous! Half of the time, I lost against the doll because of that distracting face. Its true beauty has me caught off guard."

That's when Hyō throws in yet another comment, "Honestly speaking, I feel like it's an understatement. This thing has a beauty that can rival the gods. It's almost inhuman. I mean, it's just a doll, and yet it possesses something so indescribable, just stunning."

"Right? I actually feel a bit unworthy to call myself handsome after seeing this face," Akio pauses for a moment, his fingers tugging at his bangs as he nods to himself, "Just, wow, I wouldn't even know how to handle it if I ever saw how the person it's modeled after looked like. Just the thought itself might destroy me."

These men, Akio and Hyō, have truly reached an unbelievable level of stupidity and uselessness, saying sh*t like that. But it wasn't like you had room to talk. You did witness his face firsthand, and the memories you harbored are still fresh on your mind, and the thought of seeing it again made you want to scratch your skin until it bled, so yes, you understood their stupid little admiration for its face.

But to you, its face is everything but perfection. A little piece of hell on earth, one that still haunted you every single waking hour of your existence and never failed to torment you, each glance you cast its way only stoked the flames of rage simmering within. To you, it's the most terrifying, terrifying thing in this world.

Yes, you are so angry at yourself because of it.

A horrible combination of resentment and guilt festering inside, twisting and twisting and burning in the pit of your belly until you feel sick to your very core. These emotions shouldn't have been there, and yet the mere sight of Yoriichi's copy made you want to lash out, to tear everything apart and break free from this endless cage you yourself had unknowingly imprisoned yourself in.

For once, you do not want to be utterly and helplessly in love with something that is dead and gone that you cannot even reach.

Yet, in the same manner, that a moth gravitates towards a flickering candle, you cannot help but be pulled right back into the past again, letting it consume you and burn you until there is nothing but a heap of ashes that no longer resembles anything human. The doll in front of you does little to comfort you; it only amplifies that feeling that grows every second you can see its face as if it was mocking you for being so incapable and pathetic, and you hate, hate, hate yourself for that.

Last night you said your final goodbye, and that's it. Stop thinking about it! It has been done and dusted. What more could you add to the f*cking mess you have created? Just stop and—

"Can you two shut the f*ck up now? This is starting to get pathetic." Your voice shakes as you interrupt the duo's conversation, their tone growing more heated and annoying. Their words are just mere background noise, distracting you from your inner turmoil and misery, and you simply can't handle any of them right now.

They stare back, stunned and baffled, like two children being caught in the act of disobedience. Before Akio could utter anything else that would most likely end with you using his remains as fertilizer for the flowers, you can sense a certain shift in the air, a sort of buzzing in your fingertips, like a low drumbeat thrumming steadily against your ribs.

It is like an alarm ringing, triggering you to fall instantly into the familiar pattern, the grip on the sword in your hand firm and steady, as the doll stands before you with a deadly grace that matches yours. Without a single warning, it lunges forward, aiming for your neck. Instinct kicks in, and in one fluid motion, you deflect, jumping away just a fraction of a second too late, and you feel a sharp stinging on your arm.

f*ck, because of your self-pity, you forgot that Hyō already activated that stupid thing, and now one of its blades is stained red, crimson, and thick and dripping, dripping, dripping—It hurts. It hurts so, so, so much.

Then there is nothing but silence, your focus on the red color, and all you see is the pain and misery, all the anger and resentment, and it is all-consuming, so much that you can't even register the sudden change in stance as the doll lunges, lunges at you, lunges.

Not wasting another moment, your body springs to action, jumping back and out of range of the mechanical doll's second attack, twisting and turning around, using every skill you've learned to avoid being hit, knowing exactly how to avoid the blades as if it was second nature, and it is in a sense. You had done this countless times before, knew the motions by memory, knew exactly how to avoid every single blow directed your way, to the point that it came naturally now and without thought.

Just as instinctive and as innate as breathing, metal clashing against metal, blow after blow, parry after parry, and never-ending, it kept coming and coming, like a dream of endless combat, a dance without end, and all you could do was continue and allow your body to keep fighting.

For a moment, the nostalgia washes over you and threatens to drown you, a wave of images and memories so sharp and clear that you might have forgotten where and when you are.

You are stuck in that one moment, reliving that one day, with the smell of dried leaves, grass, and sweat, a flash of red hair under the sun, and the smile on your almost lover's face as you two did go through yet another sparring session on a warm summer afternoon. You remember the breeze blowing, cool and refreshing, as you pushed your limits and used every ounce of willpower and determination to land a blow on Yoriichi, only for him to block it with ease.

It was the same.

This was just like one of those sparring sessions, with eerie, unsettling accuracy; you can barely make a difference, cannot even separate the truth and the fiction, everything blended and blurred and mixed together as you continue to move, to deflect and attack and block, almost like you are dancing, flowing in a cycle that will never end.

But it is not.

The reality crashes down, waves and waves of water, a tsunami falling down and down at you, leaving only the destruction behind. With a rush of air and a blade striking true, and the reality of the present came crashing down, You were reliving a dream, the past replaying in your subconscious, and as you watched the blades clash and crash and twist, your fingers on the hilt grew numb, and a dull ache seared through your chest.

Yoriichi is gone.

There was the metallic sound as one of its swords fell to the ground, glistening in the sun and coated in red, seeping into the cracks and the grass, and it was all a blur, just senseless and meaningless noise, a mess of color, movement, and emotion, a chaotic tangle of conflict and misery, and before you can even register the thought, you swing your sword and sever a limb from the mechanical doll. Letting it fall together with the sword tightly gripped in its hand.

'Four more to go', numbly, your mind provides you with this information, and your heart beats rapidly in your throat; the familiar surge of energy rushes through you, and before the mechanical doll can process the loss, you are moving again.

Faster, faster, you force yourself to be faster, every step a desperate plea not to slow, not to fall, not to think, not to feel, a mantra, a prayer, a wish, repeated over and over in your head, knowing it will never be enough. And, somehow, you succeed, dodging the blades that swung and swiped at you, barely grazing your skin, sometimes missing, sometimes drawing blood, but you cannot bring yourself to care, cannot even register the pain or the wounds appearing on your body.

In the same way, your ears do not want to register the proud cheers erupting from Akio and even Hyō, who should be utterly mortified about the fact you destroy his precious, irreplaceable, and expensive mechanical doll with no guilt whatsoever.

How do you even face the fact that, in your mind, you were fighting someone no longer there, the worst enemy of your heart and soul, and your body only reacted as if it was still him, trapped in that loop with you, a never-ending nightmare?

You cannot.

Just as you strike yet another arm away, you can sense something different, a shift in the mood, a slight pause, a hesitation, as if the doll was rethinking its entire strategy, recalculating and refocusing, a shift of weight and tension.

But, you won't give the thing a chance, swinging your sword and shattering another arm, then another, and you keep going, going, breaking, cutting, slicing, and shredding, without stopping, without hesitating, without thinking of anything other than your purpose, your rage and anguish, your desire to let it all go.

And, without further ado, the final blow, the killing strike, the mechanical doll, Yoriichi Type Zero, finally stops. No blades left in its hands, some arms cut off, and certainly nothing left to attack you with. With a few seconds of silence and the rustling of leaves, you are left standing, victorious, but no true sense of relief can be found in you.

You still feel the sting of wounds and cuts that litter your skin, the ache in your limbs that suggest your body is slowly succumbing to the shock of injuries and exhaustion, but nothing, nothing, even matters at the moment. Because Yoriichi is dead, dead, dead—

And you know that! Goddamnit, you f*cking know that already!

So what? He's dead; who cares? He's never coming back, so who f*cking cares? That's what you want, isn't it?

To move on and let go and never look back, so you shouldn't care. A rotten body that will not speak or laugh or even look at you with that expression that makes you melt or crumble under his gaze.

Wait—

Maybe, in the end, you didn’t deserve him or his love. What were you, after all? Some random, insignificant person who, compared to him and his deeds, was just an unremarkable shadow, a blip of a moment in his life. You are the one that ripped him away from his dream, from the simple life he wanted, the one he could have had. With Uta, but no, you just had to be selfish, didn't you? Demanded his attention, clinging to him, and pushed the burden of the future onto his shoulders without any mercy at all the while, you just demanded and demanded and took and took.

He never wanted any of that, did he? Never planned to go down this path, becoming a sword-wielding demon hunter and fighting alongside the corps, becoming something so much bigger. No, it was your fault, wasn't it? You were the one that ruined his life, and then you died, you died, you died, and Yoriichi did not, and, right, of course, he lived for so many decades after your passing. No way would he have mourned about someone like you that long.

It's impossible. You're so dumb. Dumb and delusional, completely f*cking delusional. He must have resented you, deep down, of course. He must have been happy about your death, right? Maybe he felt relieved, freed, and able to breathe without the shackles weighing him down.

Maybe, no, not maybe, you should be glad he is not in your life anymore, the same way he probably was that you are gone, right?

Should have gotten rid of his memory and his name a long time ago. His name shouldn't cross your mind anymore. Why should it? He had already rotted away, eaten by maggots. Yeah, why waste another thought, right? So no, you don't care, the same he didn't, which, you know it's true, is true, and no need to question.

It's true, true, true, so, so true. It has to be because if not—

Before you can follow this line of thought, Akio's face pops up right in front of yours, his eyes flitting over your bruises and cuts, searching and inspecting as if trying to assess the damage done to you. Then he moves without hesitation, his arms wrapped around you, pulling you into an unexpected embrace.

"Hime, you did it! That was amazing, the way you kept taking out limbs and shattering it like you owned that thing!" As his cheers finally hit your ears, and suddenly it feels as if you can breathe again, "Since when have you been this good, huh? Where did you hide all this talent all these years? f*ck, I am impressed."

Oh, you haven't been paying attention, have you? As always, too lost in your thoughts, in the pain and agony and the turmoil building inside, letting the frustration consume you, distracting you, destroying you, it was the only thing that mattered, and for a moment, you forgot that you are not alone.

Just like him, Hyō was there too, jumping around and cheering like a man possessed, running from place to place, gathering the pieces of the mechanical doll and piling them together while yelling, "I should be mad, super mad because that's gonna take a few weeks to repair but I can't. This was awesome. It was like whoosh and bang and—Ahh, so glad I got to witness it. I must document and write it down right. That is the utmost importance!"

What?

Akio laughs and raises his brow, staring back into your wide eyes that cannot hide your confusion, which has him chuckling in amusem*nt, "You are truly scary and ruthless sometimes, you know, Hime?" His lips quirk slightly, eyes flashing with a hint of mischief and excitement that you find endearing and welcoming, "Seriously, just absolutely terrifying. No wonder demons are getting scared whenever they see you."

Your mouth opens, closes, and then closes, feeling somewhat at a loss for words.

Yes, Akio is a moron, a clown, and a fool, sometimes. Still, he was also your friend, one that could pull you out of your head when things got too much. You were, no, more than friends, partners in crime, a duo of chaotic, destructive, and destructive energy.Without realizing it, he had made your thoughts fade away, chased those dark, lingering doubts and fears away, filling the void with his laughter, his antics, and his obnoxious presence.The spark that was lost in your eyes,a dull, muted expression, he was slowly bringing it backto lifewith everyword falling from his lipsand every gesture he made, pulling you back from the abyss.

It is not fully back, the light so tiny that I could be gone as fast as it came back, butstill, it was something, something that felt like progress, and you didn't realize how badly you needed that.

You almost missed a smile forming on your lips, a soft, subtle gesture as your shoulders relax, and the sword in your hand drops to the ground, your strength draining out with every second. Even at this moment, the pain, the aching in your bones, and the sting of your many wounds come back, throbbing with each passing second, but Akio is still there, an anchor to keep you tethered and steady, supporting you through every moment and refusing to leave.

It was comforting, a reminder of what it is to feel safe and protected, and a strange sense of warmth and happiness swells up inside you as a hand unconsciously reaches up to touch him, grabbing a fistful of his sleeve to pull him closer, not that he minds and welcomes the gesture, even more, wrapping his arms tight and pulling you close to keep you on your feet.

Yes, you are selfish, as greedy as someone can be, without regard for anything else. You throw away your life just to grab onto the illusion of finding Michikatsu, of wanting so desperately to trap him with the knowledge that you are alive, burying your fingers so deeply into his flesh and never letting go, and while you do all that, you greedily live in the delusion that after three years, Hakuji would still want the utterly pathetic shreds that are left of you.

It is selfish, very, extremely, unbelievably selfish, of you.Even right now, you are selfish, burying yourself deeper into Akio's embrace as if he's the only thing that keeps you togetherand doesn't allow you to completely collapse. Even in your heart, you are cruel and unyielding, only thinking and wishing and wanting everything for you and no one else, and you know there is much to think about, so much left unsaid and left undone, but at this moment, this tiny, fleeting moment, you decided to bask in the chaos and laughter.

For once, you would like to stay in the now, not let the thoughts or past creep up on you and drag you downor the uncertainty of the futuresuffocate you.

"How about we go back,eat some delicious and fatty food, and get drunklater tonight?Just the three of us enjoying ourselves,oh, and maybe even with Haganezuka-san?" Yousay suddenly, unable to resist the impulse to enjoy this tiny fragment of joy, whatever it may be, while it lasts.The other two quickly perk up at the sound of your idea, looking at you with gleaming eyes and grins that seem a bit too eager.

"Yes, of course!" Hyō blurts out without thinking twice, nodding his head so wildly it was a miracle it did not fly off his shoulders, "We should definitely have a feast. This occasion definitely calls for a celebration."

Before he can say anything else, Akio breaks in and nods his head approvingly, "Absolutely! Sounds like an amazing idea,Hime, let's get you out of those sweaty clothes,patch you up a bit, and then we will make sure we eat our weight in food.I don't know about you, but I am starving."

"Knowing you, you will also drink your weight in sake." A teasing smile makes its way to your lips, knowing Akio will find a way to drink enough alcohol to sedate a whole pack of wolves.

"Please don't underestimate me.It's gonna be all our weight combined."There is a proud glint in his eyes, one you can only respond to with a scoff and an eye roll that says far more than you could utter with words.

Hyō scratches his head,eyes flickering back and forth between you and Akio as his cheeks flush with an embarrassed tint, "Excuse me, I think you should tone down your expectations. I can barely handle more than a few sips without wanting to pass out on the spot."

"It's alright, Hyō-chan. I'm gonna teach youhow to handle it with finesse," Akio interjects, draping an arm around the blacksmith's shoulders and leaning his weight on the younger male with ease, ignoring the blacksmith's indignant squawk and struggling to pull away.

You can't help the laugh bubbling up your throat, feeling your shoulders shaking with mirth as you watch Hyō's struggle and his horror at being pushed along, dragged forward without any hope of getting loose, helplessly being tossed about in the storm of Akio's presence, knowing fully well that nothing will stop your idiot best friend unless someone chokes him or pries him off.

Well, whatever, it'll certainly make for a fun night for sure.

Just as expected, by the time night fell, somehow, your small group of four suddenly turned into the whole village.

It wasn't just Akio who couldn't control his mouth as he babbled about the "amazing show of skills" you provided. No, even Hyō made it his life mission to tell every person he came across about the gathering that's gonna happen at night.

Perhaps if the two could learn how to shut the f*ck up for one second and not yell and scream and run around, spreading the word like chickens with no brain, but no, no luck there, and not even an hour after the sun went down, you had every swordsmith and several villagers filling the main room, feasting and dancing, laughing and singing to their heart's content.

It felt good, genuinely good, having no thoughts or worries, or guilt weighing you down. Even with your many injuries and the constant aches and pains and sharp stabs, it was strangely satisfying, sitting there, sipping sake and nibbling on snacks, surrounded by laughter, noise, and happiness.

At some point, even Haganezuka, despite his protests in the beginning, joined in, seemingly more lively and talkative than ever.

He told stories and jokes, making the group double over in laughter while talking sh*t with the adults and the occasional children that snuck in. You found the whole thing rather adorable and were thoroughly amused at how quickly he relaxed and let loose. And, most surprisingly of all, he is an amazing drinker and can almost match Akio's legendary tolerance.You even remember howHaganezuka had thrown an arm around your shoulders, giving you a hearty slap on the back,as the conversation between you two was something like this—

"Haganezuka! Forge me a second sword, as in, you know, one for my descendant or something in a few decades!”You had shouted out with a huge grin on your face, already prepared topesterhimfor hours.

The swordsmith blinked a couple of times, looking as if you just asked him for the moon and stars, his features turning into a slight scowl, "Whythe hell would I waste my precious time forging a sword for a brat who hasn't even been born? Especially one thatgonna share your blood?"

"Why not?"You simply shrugged, returning his look with a lazy smile,"Just imagine it,one of my descendants, asstrong and talentedas I am, running aroundwielding your sword, which is very much good quality. Think of how many demons they will slice up and send to hell. It sounds awesome!"You leaned in closer, a devious smirk curling on your lips as you continued, "And who knows, maybe, just maybe, it's gonna be the sword to end it all? Your legacy living on, becoming the greatest weapon, and let's be honest, we both know my descendant will be better than any other."

A silence stretched out, and you could almost hear the gears turning in his head, pondering your words and considering the pros and cons.Then, to your surprise, he mumbled under his breath, "Let's not get ahead of ourselves, though. Your descendant might be a complete failure and a disappointment,"His eyes narrowed, a mischievous glint shimmering in those dark orbs, and you knew you had hooked him right where you wanted, "It's f*cking stupid and insane. I'm gonna do it."

And that was how you got Haganezuka to accept your request, having him drunkenly promise to forge you a superbeautifuland amazing sword that your descendants will absolutely love and cherish. And with descendants, you actually mean yourself.

Well, you think. To be fair, you don't really remember that well if this conversation truly happened that way or not.Probably not.

Ah, well, it doesn't matter too much.Haganezuka has probably already forgotten about it in the morning, anyway.

But you do remember for sure that as the night went on, every time you passed by him, he was either engaging in conversations or cheering someone on in a stupid game or two while Hyō was clinging onto his back, face completely flushedfrom the drinks and unable to speak a coherent sentence without breaking into a laugh or stumbling on his own feet.

And Akio, oh, dear god.The blonde had challenged half the men there to a drinking game, all with different variations, all with the same results, and the sight of him chugging the sake bottles and taking shot after shot while people screamed and cheered him on was glorious, a true spectacle.

At one point, you joinedthe fun, quickly finding yourself matching him with equal measure, even going so far as to suggest a bet and a small prize for whoever won. In the end, you came out victorious, with a smug smile written all over your face, taking delight as Akio groveled before you, declaring you the true and greatest sake-drinking champion of all time and vowing to always worship and respect you with his entire body and soul.

God, what an idiot.

Needless to say, everyone was thoroughly amused and in high spirits, having the time of their life, a temporary break from the constant stress, a break from the worry and sadness of what might come and the uncertainty of their future. While It was chaos, total chaos, and bliss, and it was honestly the best nights you had in months, if not years, and you were thankful that the house had managed to survive the chaos without collapsing on the spot or catching fire, which is quite surprising since there had to be more than one accidental spark.

So yes, you thoroughly enjoyed yourself and spent the next day nursing an awful hangover and trying not to throw up the remnants of all that fat and fatty food. In fact, Akio was nursing an even worse hangover because it took until noon for him to wake up the day after and then another two days to completely recover. From what you witnessed, Hyō was equally as bad but definitely had it worse, forcing himself to get up and be the only productive person of you three by making repairs and fixing the damages to his precious doll and putting the broken pieces back in order.

Haganezuka was the complete opposite, with no hangover whatsoever. He woke up early with a bright smile and an exuberance and liveliness as if he hadn't downed the same amount of sake as the rest of you; he even managed to finish your new sword way before the day he had originally planned.

And with him throwing the sword into your face without any remorse or mercy, it marks officially the end of your short-lived holiday adventure in the not-so-hidden swordsmith village. When the time came to say farewells and bid goodbye, the whole atmosphere in the village was gloomy. Neither Akio nor you would have thought that by the end of your stay, most people in the village would consider you both acquaintances rather than mere annoyances.

However, that isn't to say they would be willing to extend their hospitality anytime soon. Once both of you had finished gathering your belongings and were ready to leave, Hyō was crying while Haganezuka was determined not to show any emotions, though the unshed tears and his pouting lips speak a thousand words, and after plenty of back-pats and promises to come and visit soon. Akio and you parted ways with them and are finally leaving.

The second you are both outside and out of view from the other two, a huge sigh escapes your lips as a pout overtakes you, "Welp, guess that means the fun is over."

Akio is quick to lean on your shoulder, still using you for support, his mind and body not yet fully recovered, "And right back to the horrendous daily life of being the best Hashira in this generation."

"Yeah, and if we are lucky, maybe this time we will have to hunt for only ten days straight because since we have been gone, there are thirty new f*ckers lurking around, and everyone else is just incompetent,” Your voice is dripping with sarcasm and dry humor, "You know, the normal sh*t we have to put up with."

Suddenly, he slaps his hand over your mouth, almost hissing at you, "Shhh, don't jinx it, Hime. Maybe they do not know that we are already left the village. Let's at least keep our hopes up till we get back to Edo."

At that, your eyes lit up because, yeah, maybe there is a sliver of hope. Akio is right, and it's not too much to get your hopes up. It was worth a shot, wasn't it? You smile brightly at him and pat his arm affectionately, "You're right. There is still a tiny chance they haven't even noticed."

It's not like you are completely wrong, just not entirely correct, either. It won't take long until word travels and reaches the demon slayer corps headquarters that two of their best Hashiras left the village and are back on duty, but until then, Akio and you are free to enjoy your peaceful days of being incognito.

"See, that's the spirit, Hime. Let's just try to relax and have a bit of fun while it lasts. Oh, how about we travel to Kyoto again, or I know a great place you would love! How about—"

"You idiots!" Before Akio can even finish his sentence, a loud caw comes from the sky, and Aniki, that stupid ass crow, falls from the sky in his usual dramatic ways and onto Akio's head, scaring the living sh*t out of the blonde, "It's time to get back to work; Master is not in the slightest bit happy about you!"

Oh, for f*ck's sake, of course, it has to be that bastard of a bird.

"Goddamnit, you evil bird. We only left twenty minutes ago. How the hell can you already be here?" Akio wails as he reaches his hands out to grab the bird, but Aniki is faster, flying away and cawing even louder than before.

"I am just an innocent crow doing what my master orders me to do, you imbecile." Its tone is flat and dry, almost unimpressed with Akio's antics, though a hint of amusem*nt seems to linger underneath, "Though I will never understand the sheer idiocy of you people who are supposed to be the best demon slayer alive. Did you seriously think that the master wouldn't immediately be informed about your departure? Now move your ass and hurry east!"

"Okay, first off, that was rude," You speak up, crossing your arms over your chest and frowning deeply at the crow, "Second, what did I even do for you to deserve this treatment? Huh? I didn't say a single word, so why am I bullied too?"

"Shut your traps and run!" It hollers, flying circles above your heads as it looks for any possible way to show you in the right direction, "Stop the drama, no need for excuses, just go! And be quick about it."

f*ck, this is truly the end of your break.

With a deep exhale and a whine, you turn around, with Akio right behind you, and start running, slowly picking up speed as you dart towards the direction the stupid bird is pointing in and disappear into the distant horizon.

You've lost track of how many demons you killed this month, but to give credit where it's due, you and Akio have been quite productive and efficient, so Ubuyashiki isn't necessarily mad per se, just a bit annoyed and exasperated that's why Akio and you both did not have a single free day the past two months.

Yes, that's right. Two whole months. That bitch of a master is seriously resentful and can hold a grudge like no other. He's not even subtle about it, having that damn crow bring you tons of tasks and missions that either require you two to hunt a certain area for weeks or team up with the lower-ranked slayers who either have no clue or refuse to obey.

Whoever said violence is not a solution was wrong.

There is nothing that motivates you more than wanting to bury your fist deep in a low-ranking swordsman's gut and rip its intestines out. Did you? To be honest, you almost did, but not because he was not good at his job. But because the dumbass kept doubting you and underestimating your skills just because you're a woman.

Yay, misogyny. Exactly want you needed. Not.

So, of course, you lost control and beat the crap out of him and Akio, who, of course, got involved in the situation for the sake of chaos and because he wasn't amused by his stupid comments, joined in, and helped you throw the kid around like a ragdoll and remind him of his place.

Anyway, it's been two months, and to say you're exhausted is an understatement, to the point that even Aniki has learned to lay off before he seriously ends up as your next dinner, and without any excuse to relax, you were close to passing out or murdering everyone and burning this whole country to the ground.

Or, for now, just the demon you are currently running after, which is actually super slow. It's just hobbling away like a newborn fawn, tripping over its own feet while desperately trying to keep a few yards ahead of you.

It's kind of sad, actually. Poor bastard is not used to fighting or being chased. Either that, or it's just so f*cking dumb that it can't seem to function properly in general. Regardless, it's a waste of energy and time to keep chasing it when you could simply kill it and move on.

But there's something satisfying in chasing it around, hunting it down like prey. Even with its clumsiness and slowness, there's still a thrill and anticipation as your feet carry you through the field and beyond, weaving around and darting between trees, not allowing it any reprieve. Maybe it is because you know that it is weak, that its death will be swift, that makes it somewhat enjoyable, knowing that you are the superior one.

Or because it is, again, just an evil human being? One that murdered so many without guilt or remorse.

When Akio and you arrived in the small village called Hyakumae, due to Aniki reporting various women going missing and it is suspected to be a demon on the loose, your instincts have been going off, telling you that something is up and not the way it should be. And, of course, you were correct; after the sun had fallen, Akio and you went straight to work, scouring the area for any signs of the demon or the bodies of the missing women.

Nothing could have prepared you for the screams that met your ears, the smell of blood and death filling your nose, and the sight that met your eyes, which threw your mind back to that slaughterhouse—

Your feet froze, your heart plummeting to the bottom of your stomach as it took just one look, a simple glance, and you understood what you were facing. A woman with torn clothes, tears streaming down her cheeks, as she desperately screamed out, pleading with any gods listening to stop the torture, to have someone save her.

You have seen horrors that would scar the weak of heart, and yet what you saw that night was different, far beyond your understanding, so different that it shattered the barrier of sanity and turned your vision white with rage. It took a few seconds for Akio and you to fully grasp what exactly it is that you were witnessing.

Her cries and pleas were maddening, uncontrollably driving you insane as your eyes darted from her to her attacker, the demon who seemed to be enjoying every second of it, buried inside her. It was a monster, not one in flesh, but in its cruel and malicious intentions.

This is no natural evil; this is something crafted by hell itself.

Save her? But it was too late, wasn't it? You will save her life; but no. The damage had been done, irreversible, and beyond repair, one she has to live with for the rest of her life. A nightmare, a wound, a mark that she can never erase or escape from. Just the thought of it made you sick to your core. The hatred bubbling and brewing, rising in your throat until you could taste it, metallic and bitter and vengeful.

There is nothing that can be done, not in the short term or the long, so you had done the only thing you can, the only thing you knew for sure would sate the rage burning inside, burning and consuming everything, everything— You snapped. Akio and you, without even thinking twice or second-guessing yourselves, pulled that beast away from her and threw it down, making sure there was enough distance, far away from the woman.

The moment that beast opened its mouth to speak, plead, or explain, it was met with your voice, dangerous and dripping with venom and the promise of a gruesome end, "You have ten seconds to run because I will not slaughter you before her eyes."

In any other situation, your mind would tell you that it may be a stupid idea to let that traumatized woman be alone with a man after this, but you will not let Akio become a sinner; his hands should be clean of this.

And, of course, the beast knew what that meant, and it ran, sprinted, and disappeared into the depths of the forest. All night, you prepared yourself for a tough fight, only to find the pathetic mess that is stumbling in front of you, just barely able to keep itself together.

Just a human.

Again.

Your tongue is coated with a bitter taste, but it fades away quickly because you've done it enough times. No matter if it's a demon or supposed to be human, the point is, it is a thing that does not deserve any mercy or sympathy; It will get what it deserves. That this is justice, a judgment for the evil deeds it has committed, and this is just another simple kill to stop the never-ending cycle of destruction and agony.

"Please! Please, let me live! Have mercy and spare me!" The demon's wail rings in your ear as it trips once again, rolling a few yards forward, and ends up on its back, helpless and vulnerable. Its features twist into a pathetic grimace, almost desperate.

It should know by now that it's already too late that no one, especially you, would even consider sparing it. A low, ugly scowl etches into your face, "Why the hell would I do that? How can a piece of sh*t like you have any right to ask for mercy?"

Your tone is ice cold and unforgiving, and it only seems to scare it more, its whole body trembling from head to toe. Good, it should be shaking with fear and terror, knowing exactly what is about to happen to it. That thing starts to sob, sobbing harder than you've ever seen someone sob in your life, babbling and blubbering, its tongue seemingly stuck to the top of its mouth, tripping and stumbling over itself, trying to find the right words to make its case.

It is like sandpaper on your eardrum, the noise scratching and scratching and scratching and not giving you an inch to even think. It's annoying, truly, truly annoying. You don't care, don't give a sh*t about its excuses, so what are you waiting for?

Kill the f*cking thing, end it, just f*cking end it. It's just like any other f*cker you have come across. Another number, a meaningless number, just as it was the thousandth kill, so it's no different, no different from any other before it or any that might come after.

Whatever, you don't care.

It was easy then, and it would be easy this time as well. It will always be the same, the same pattern, the same song, and dance.

"You know, the last time I killed someone like you, I shoved my sword so far down his throat that I cut out his spinal cord. How about I try something different with you?" You say casually, your face a mask of indifference as you casually take a step closer, "How about I force my blade up your ass, hm? If I ram it in hard enough, I'll tear your insides to shreds, making you scream and scream and scream. It will be a pain beyond any level of comprehension you can imagine."

The thing shrieks, trying to crawl away from you, but your foot is already on top of its throat, holding it down. It's pathetic, truly, truly pathetic, and your stomach is twisting with disgust at the idea that you are so close to it, "Listen closely because this is the last words you will ever hear, so listen carefully: I will make sure to kill you in an excruciatingly slow manner. With every moment, every breath, you will know what is happening; you will feel every ounce of pain as my blade moves and twists and digs into you."

And as promised, that is exactly what you do.

You begin slowly, prolonging and prolonging, torturing and taunting.

The cries and pleas did not stop, but that is the point, to watch it crumble, to tear and rip it apart, to break and fracture and shatter, over and over again, and it's dying, dying, dying, just like all the rest before it, the life draining out of its eyesand it's making you numb, making you remember and forget and remember again, repeating the cycle, over and over and over, like a sickening cycle that can never be stopped or erased.

Why do you have to witness every sickening and ugly aspect that humans are capable of? Why was this happening, again and again, a never-ending nightmare, repeating and replaying in front of you? It's sick. It's wrong. It's terrible, the ugliest display, an example of what humans have always been and will always be, no matter how much time passes or the world changes around them.

"How annoying, so annoying," You utter under your breath, almost a sigh as if this was just a chore, an obligation you are forced to complete, "So f*cking annoying. I don't get it."

Your mind goes blank, and your ears ring a monotonous and repetitive sound, and then, finally, silence, deafening, deathly silence, but you don't realize or register it.

Instead, you gaze at the mess beneath you, nothing but a corpse, a piece of garbage, an eyesore, but somehow, you feel no sense of accomplishment or triumph, no joy or pride in killing another piece of scum.

It is dead, and that's the end of that.

As you stare at the lump of flesh, its eyes hollowed and lifeless and staring back at you, there is something in your soul that cracks, a shard that seems to fade away into nothingness, disappearing without a trace. And you wonder, a faint, tiny wonder, in the deepest part of you, whether anything or anyone is really worth saving or even worth bothering with.

After all, in the grand scheme of things, who is really a human or a monster, and who can make the call on either side?

With a deep inhale, you straighten, your shoulders stiff, and your body still, staring at the landscape around you, a world that is still spinning, turning, a world that has no idea of the atrocities that occur within its boundaries.

So why bother trying to fix anything? What are you supposed to do, you think? What is your purpose, your value? What meaning is there in all of this, if at the end, the result is always the same, no matter who you fight or kill or befriend or love?

There is no meaning to all of this, not anymore, just the same cycle over and over again, the same ending to your journey, the same conclusion that feels like you have read this story a thousand times.

And you turn away, leaving the lifeless corpse behind, a weight pressing down on your chest, heavy and persistent, relentless and never-ending.

Bile rises in your throat, a wave of nausea threatening to wash away what's left of your sanity.

You keep walking, ignoring the sensation and the pain and the way your whole body feels as if it's on fire, burning up and burning away, and all you know is that the world will continue on, the sun will rise, the sun will set, and it's not just your existence that's pointless; everything is meaningless.

Your knees hit the ground, and your hands move to your face, covering your features and muffling a guttural, wordless cry, and it hurts, it hurts so f*cking badly as if every nerve and synapse is firing and sending signals of sheer agony, every fiber of your being rejecting the idea, this reality, this world.

It's suffocating, choking, strangling as you crumple further, trying to find any air, any relief, any sense of comfort to pull you out of this maelstrom, but there is nothing.

Just the bile that rises higher and higher, tasting so much like iron and shame and guilt.

You can't breathe; you can't f*cking breathe as you heave and retch, blood spilling out from your mouth, thick and sticky and smelly, and you have to calm down, have to think, have to focus, have to f*cking focus, but you can't even think, much less understand what the hell is happening.

Akio—

You need him here; you need him now because you can't think, can't breathe, can't exist!

Where is Akio?

He isn't here, isn't near you, nowhere in sight, and suddenly, the idea of his absence sends a shock wave through your body, and you find yourself hyperventilating, gasping for air, reaching for anything to cling on, but all you touch is your blood and the dirt, wet and slimy against your fingers.

It's too much, too much, too much!

Your mind yells, screaming and begging for help, for someone to save you, to pull you out of this hell hole— And before you even realize it, there is a shadow looming over you as if to mock you, a spectator of your pain and agony, watching with amusem*nt as you struggle and drown and die.

You can't escape it, the phantom, the specter, the demon, the shadow, the shadow in the corner of your eye, a creeping and growing, eating and devouring, pulling you deeper and deeper into a darkness that seems never-ending.

Everything stops as your name is whispered and carried on the wind, as your lungs constrict, and your throat clogs up, and your heart beats faster and faster and faster, and then it's like a switch is flipped as the voice hits your eardrums.

It's a voice you know too well, a voice you have heard before, and you can finally open your eyes again, finally breathe again, finally take in the reality around you, the world back in focus and in motion, and it's not as chaotic as it was before.

And there it is.

That figure, that silhouette, familiar and terrifying all the same, hovering above you, and all you can do is blink up at him as your vision fades in and out, his presence overwhelming, his aura, his existence, everything.

Your mouth opens to whisper a single word— a name, a plea, a desperate attempt at seeking anything, as a new wave of indescribablepain rips through your whole body.

"—Michikatsu?"